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Sharing a house permanently with Buck was an adjustment, but not as big of one as Eddie’d anticipated. It wasn’t technically the first time they were roommates, or even shared a bed – that had been during the height of lockdown in Buck’s old loft.
A lot had changed since then. For one, back then they hadn’t been aware they weren’t straight. On Eddie’s part, at least, there was an underlying sexual tension now that made it hard to adjust to being around Buck again. They had a couple of weeks of awkwardly shifting around each other, jerking away when they brushed shoulders, and being overly polite when they tried to walk through the same doorway.
Getting back to work helped. Things were a little different now that Buck was pregnant and had adjusted duties on the job, but after a full twenty-four where touching each other was both utilitarian and deeply-ingrained muscle memory, and they got home and played video games with their shoulders pressed against each other until one of them (Buck) fell asleep from exhaustion – after that whole day, they remembered that the world wouldn’t end if they touched. The simmer under Eddie’s skin didn’t go away, but the comfort of finding their friendship rhythm again more than made up for it.
It was their day off. Entering the front door after driving Christopher to school, Eddie heard clanking from the kitchen indicating the grumpy sleeping beauty had finally gotten out of bed. He smelled the reheated coffee pot (fucking Hildy) and gravitated toward the smell.
Buck was leaning against the counter finishing a bowl of cereal. He’d combed his hair and thrown on a lightweight hoodie. Eddie poured himself some coffee. “Good morning.”
He got a grunt in response. He got out of the way so Buck could put his bowl into the dishwasher – with just a touch more force and noise than necessary. He looked up to and glowered when he saw Eddie watching him.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“You’ve been cranky.”
“I’m growing a person, sue me.”
Eddie pretended to think about that then said, “Mm, nope. I know you and that’s not it.”
“How could you possibly know that? It’s not like you have all my other pregnancies to compare it with.”
He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Eddie kind of liked when Buck got salty like this. When he was mad, Buck normally withdrew into himself and got passive-aggressive, so hearing such open sarcasm from him was an interesting change. It was a little hot. But Buck was usually hot to Eddie.
None of that changed the fact that Buck was clearly bothered about something and refusing to spit it out.
“Come on, tell me what’s bugging you. Even if I can’t help, it might feel good to vent.”
Buck groaned. “It’s embarrassing.”
Eddie scoffed. “How embarrassing could it be?”
The look Buck levelled at Eddie promised danger. Like Eddie didn’t know what can of worms he was opening and he’d better brace himself. He was all dark blue eyes and shiny honey-colored curls this morning and Eddie felt his heart rate pick up. “Fine. You really want to know? I’m in my second trimester and I’m so turned on all the fucking time that I’m going insane. Happy?”
And oh, if that didn’t make the pounding in his chest so much worse. Eddie wasn’t sure what he expected, but this sounded like an extremely fixable problem to him. Tempting, at minimum. “That’s it?”
Buck stared at him, offended, then snorted and rolled his eyes so hard he’d give their teenager a run for his money. “That’s it? ‘That’s it?’ he says, standing there with his second cup of coffee of the day looking all – I don’t give a crap how much Catholic repression you’ve got going on; nothing gets you pent up like pregnancy hormones.”
“Not even your heat cycles?”
“That’s different. That’s more like a fucked-up twenty-four-hour flu, at least for me. This is more like a full-body itch on a hot day and it just won’t go away.”
“And you haven’t done anything about it? Taken care of things yourself?”
“Hormones, Eddie! It’s not that easy. Plus, we share a bed and it’s not like I can take a shower ten times a day. The water bill would give me nightmares.”
Eddie laughed lightly. He put his coffee mug down and pushed off the kitchen counter, slowly moving in Buck’s direction. “No, I believe you, that does sound frustrating. I’m just saying there’s a pretty obvious solution. If you want to take it.”
Buck’s unimpressed expression slowly melted into this cautious, longing smolder that made Eddie want to burst into flames. “What kind of solution?”
“The kind where we share a bed.” Eddie kept closing some of the distance between them.
Buck visibly swallowed. His eyes were such a deep blue in this morning light and Eddie couldn’t look away. He didn’t want to try. “We haven’t since…you never said anything about…why we started in the first place.”
It took Eddie a moment to realize what Buck was getting at. Buck didn’t know if Eddie still thought of himself as straight. It struck him as a bit silly, because what kind of straight man buried himself between another man’s legs night after night? Would let himself get kissed stupid by another man and split open on his cock? He knew now what his sexuality was, the label new and strange but comfortable. But he was nervous to verbalize it to Buck. I’m demisexual. I need a deep emotional bond to feel attraction. Buck hadn’t gotten into this expecting anything serious; he’d been looking for a rebound. Of course Eddie would end up with a sexuality that all but forced him to admit being in love with somebody just by coming out.
Instead of saying any of this, Eddie took another step towards Buck. “Well. Definitely not straight.”
Buck glanced down at his lips. “So, you want to start having sex again?”
“I mean,” They were so close now, Eddie could feel Buck’s body heat, “it is kind of my fault you’re in this predicament. I should take responsibility, right?”
“It is a hundred percent your fault.”
“Mm, fifty percent.”
“What happened to ‘taking responsibility?’ Step up, Eddie.”
Then Eddie was crowding Buck against the fridge and kissing him, one hand on the back of his neck and the other on his waist. Buck’s back hit the refrigerator door and Eddie heard a couple of magnets clatter to the floor. Buck’s hands moved up to grip Eddie’s upper arms and the touch burned through the thin sleeves of his t-shirt. Buck smelled amazing and he was warm and his growing belly was firm under Eddie’s wandering fingers and he hadn’t had this in months.
He could and would have stayed there forever, holding Buck against his body and while they kissed each other senseless, but a soft whimper and a roll of hips reminded Eddie that he had a job to do. One he would take great pleasure in fulfilling.
Eddie ran a teasing finger just under the waistband of Buck’s sweatpants, and pulled away. He’d intended to take Buck’s hand and lead him back to the bedroom, but Buck responded by grabbing his waist and yanking them back together. He kissed him again, before moving his lips along his cheekbone and working his way to the shell of his ear. Buck nibbled and licked at the sensitive skin, and Eddie all but collapsed into him, holding himself up with his hands on the fridge. His face fell into Buck’s neck.
He breathed Buck in. He’d gotten well-acquainted with Buck’s smell while they’d hooked up, and he thought he remembered it well. But as he mouthed along his neck he swore the scent had changed. It was headier, sweeter. Buck shivered under his lips; he wanted to taste more of him.
Eddie slid his hands over Buck’s shoulders, down his arms, and onto his hips; then he dropped to his knees. He traced the divots of Buck’s hipbones under the hoodie, barely dipping under the waistband of his sweats. Buck’s hips jerked and stuttered. Eddie didn’t have much teasing in him after several months of nothing, so he quickly pulled down the elastic far enough to release Buck’s throbbing length.
This was something they’d built up to when they’d started fucking. They’d begun with making out and mutual hand jobs, which had quickly escalated to Eddie topping Buck.
That had been Buck’s suggestion. He’d reasoned that it was easiest logistically and more similar to sex with cis women than the other things they’d eventually try, since he could get wet naturally. Even if he weren’t an omega, when Buck had suggested experimenting together, Eddie’d been relieved he wasn’t being thrown into the deep end of gay sex all at once. Having a dick in your mouth or up your ass was, ehrm, a big adjustment. Trust Buck to think about how to ease him into sleeping with another man. He’d been just so…Buck about it, gentle and playful and sweet, that Eddie’s nerves and years of repression hadn’t stood a chance. Within a couple of weeks he was tentatively taking Buck’s cock into his mouth. He’d found it wasn’t better nor worse than having his face buried in someone’s pussy, but the noises he could illicit out of Buck were downright addicting.
There was nothing tentative about what he was doing now. One hand braced on Buck’s hipbone, keeping him steady, and the other going to stroke Buck’s cock. He was hard and bright pink and Eddie needed it in his mouth right now.
“God, Eddie,” Buck moaned. The sound was beautiful and Eddie needed to hear more. He slid his lips over the head of Buck’s cock.
The weight of it on his tongue and pressing on his cheeks became familiar again fast. He relaxed his jaw and slowly started moving his head back and forth, making sure to get as much slide as possible.
Buck whimpered and moaned above him. The noises sent a shudder down Eddie’s spine. He might otherwise take his time with this, mouth down Buck’s torso and lick his cock until he was begging for it. It’s been ages since he had Buck at his mercy like this. However, the kitchen tile was already digging into his knees, and Buck was already more pent-up than he’d ever been. He picked up the pace and, remembering he had a hand as well, started stroking the part of the shaft his mouth couldn’t reach. A thump and yet another fridge magnet clattering to the ground let Eddie know Buck had thrown his head back.
Eddie pulled off to make sure he wasn’t hurt. “You okay?”
Buck grabbed the fabric of Eddie’s shirt. “Do not fucking stop, please – ”
Well, he didn’t need to be told twice. He went back to sucking his best friend’s dick, breathing through his nose and his head swirling from the musky scent. Buck moaned and panted and cursed. Eddie kept one hand firmly pushing his hips against the refrigerator door to keep him from thrusting. When Buck started clawing at his hair, Eddie knew he was getting close.
He stopped stroking with his hand (much do Buck’s audible displeasure) to slip his fingers farther into Buck’s pants, pushing past his balls until – bingo. Eddie coated his fingers with the slick that was gathering around Buck’s hole, and went back to stroking his cock. This time, he moved his fist faster and out of time with his mouth.
Buck released a choked groan. It was louder than any other noise he’d made this morning and Eddie preened internally. It wasn’t thirty seconds later that Buck gasped out, “Eddie, I’m about to come.”
He took a deep breath and held it, bracing himself. Buck shuddered through his orgasm, spilling into Eddie’s mouth. He swallowed and kept stroking with his hand until Buck was spent, then released his cock. They stayed there for a minute while he nosed along the strip of exposed skin between the hem of the sweater and the top of the sweats that were yanked askew.
Despite having come, Buck didn’t seem to want to release his death grip on Eddie’s hair. But the floor was getting really painful the longer he knelt there.
“Babe – Buck, my knees are kind of killing me.” He hoped he didn’t notice the slip.
“Shit, get back up here.” Buck grabbed Eddie and hauled him back to his feet with astonishing strength, considering his legs had been shaking a moment ago from coming down Eddie’s throat. One moment he was kissing Buck’s hipbone, the next he was dizzy from being pulled up and having his mouth claimed.
God, but Buck was an amazing kisser. He was all passion but deliberate movements, even when he was desperate. His strong hands moved from the grip he had under Eddie’s armpits to hold both of his cheeks, firm but tender, not letting him go anywhere or do anything except stand there and take having the life kissed out of him.
Not that Eddie minded being a little manhandled, but it was time for Buck to get a taste of his own medicine. He wrapped his arms tightly around Buck’s waist and pulled them both away from the fridge and toward the bedroom, dragging Buck along with him. He came willingly, but also slid his hands under Eddie’s clothes, a palm squeezing his bare ass and fingers tracing over his spine while they made out. The result was a lot of bumping into walls and probably a couple bruises, but they arrived safely at the bed and Eddie was burning up where Buck’s flesh touched his.
Eddie’s moment of controlling the momentum passed. Buck pulled away from him for the first time in what felt like hours. His lips were slick and kiss-swollen, his face flushed a beautiful shade of pink, and he was reaching for Eddie’s shirt and yanking it over his head. He was pushing Eddie onto the bed before ripping off his own hoodie and t-shirt.
Time stopped as Eddie laid eyes on Buck’s pregnant belly. The bump wasn’t very large, but then, Buck was a big man already. Eddie sat up from where he’d landed on the bed and his hands went to cup the rounded bump just above Buck’s sweatpants, where his cock was still hanging out from earlier and valiantly trying to get hard again. But here was evidence of what they’d done. A sign of how truly tangled up their lives had gotten, the beginnings of a person they’d made together.
He felt Buck twist his hands in his hair. “Eddie. Eddie, please.”
“Take what you need. I’m all yours, Buck,” Eddie murmured.
There was that look again, like Buck believed Eddie had no idea what he was asking for. But he did – he wanted everything Buck would unleash on him and more. He would happily drown in the storm that is Evan Buckley.
“Take off your pants.” Eddie was quick to comply, unzipping his jeans and shoving them down his legs along with his boxers. Buck finished kicking off his sweatpants. The both moved more firmly onto the bed and climbed on top of Eddie, hovering over him. His baby bump hung more obviously from this angle. The sight made Eddie’s breath hitch.
Buck’s biceps bulged where they held him up on either side of Eddie’s head. He leaned down and murmured into his ear, “I need you to fuck me.” And he leaned back, lined up Eddie’s cock with his opening, and sank down onto him.
Eddie saw pink. For several seconds, he knew nothing but the red-hot pleasure of being surrounded by hot, wet Buck. Buck, who was rocking his hips back and forth to readjust to the intrusion. Buck, who touched Eddie’s body like he was something to be treasured. Buck, who was taking what he wanted just like Eddie told him to. Buck, who was doing all the work when the whole point of this was to take care of his tragically overactive libido. Eddie shifted underneath him to get better leverage and thrust up into him.
It was hard, and messy, and animalistic. Buck dug his fingernails into Eddie’s shoulders while he bounced in his lap. Eddie met every thrust, braced on his elbows and feet planted on the bed, reaching deep into Buck’s body over and over again. His hole was dripping and dark pink where it clenched around Eddie’s dick.
But Eddie wanted more than this rough fuck. He sat up until they were chest to chest and once again breathing each other’s air. One hand still braced behind him, he rocked up into Buck, who rolled his own hips down. His pecs jiggled as they moved and his beautiful pregnant belly sat between them.
It should be weird, thinking about their baby while balls deep inside his best friend. Eddie couldn’t help it; seeing Buck round and full because of Eddie, knowing that part of himself had taken root and mixed with Buck and was growing inside of him – it filled Eddie with a possessiveness and satisfaction he didn’t know he had.
He pressed his palm between Buck’s shoulder blades, keeping them as close as possible. Buck’s collarbone was inches away from his mouth, glistening with a thin sheen of sweat, so Eddie leaned in to nip and suck at it. Buck moaned, and Eddie travelled up his neck with his tongue, still thrusting into him, sucking the skin hard enough to tease but not enough to bruise. He reached Buck’s earlobe and sucked it into his mouth, scraping his teeth gently over the sensitive flesh.
“Oh – oh my god,” Buck stuttered out, whole body jerking violently.
“Te tengo, cielito,” Eddie murmured. “Para siempre.”
Buck pulled back just enough to look Eddie in the eyes. This wasn’t the challenger expression from earlier, the one that braced Eddie to get hit by a force of nature, but something a lot more dangerous. Buck’s face had gone soft with a kind of awe, like he could barely believe what was happening. With one of his calloused hands gently cupping and stroking his cheek, this look made Eddie feel stripped bare in a way mere nakedness couldn’t achieve. It felt like hope.
Buck planted both palms on Eddie’s chest and pushed him down. Eddie’s back hit the covers. His wrists were dragged over his head and secured in Buck’s grip. Buck leaned down ‘till their mouths were inches apart, his legs caging him in, his belly pressing into Eddie’s flesh. He didn’t say anything, just started fucking himself on Eddie’s cock again in this new, unbearably intimate position. He looked directly into Eddie’s eyes like he was searching for something.
Eddie was completely surrounded. Buck was everywhere, hot skin and hot breath making Eddie’s own personal sauna while his dick got repeatedly plunged into hot slick. Buck’s hands moved from Eddie’s wrists and laced their fingers together instead, but still pinning him to the bed. It was too-much-not-enough and Eddie could feel the wave of his orgasm steadily building.
“I missed this,” Buck breathed. “I missed you.”
“I – shit, Buck I missed you, too.” Their lips almost, but didn’t quite, touch as they moved to form the words. Eddie’s undoing was the softest kiss Buck had ever given him, a barely there brush of their lips together. His gut clenched and everything went white.
When he came back to himself, Eddie pulled Buck in for another kiss. This one was deep and long, full of words he wasn’t brave enough to say. He had an arm draped over Buck’s waist and the other hand gently running through his hair.
Coming down from the high, they eventually pulled apart. Eddie couldn’t resist an extra little kiss on Buck’s nose. “Feeling better?” he tried to tease, breathless.
Buck still had his eyes closed. “Much.” He cleared his throat. “We should, uh, get cleaned up.”
They showered, separately. They changed into clean clothes. Eddie’s bone-deep satiation was tempered by the knot in his stomach.
He gathered up enough courage to say something when they were putting new sheets on the bed. “I told Christopher that he’d be the first to know if something changed between you and me.”
Buck looked up at him, tucking in a corner. “Has something changed?”
Eddie opened his mouth. The words stuck.
“Do you want something to change?” Buck pressed.
Eddie tried to speak again, but couldn’t. He looked down at the fabric in his hands and nodded.
A warm presence moved in front of him. “Eddie. Please tell me I’m reading your signals right.”
He looked up into blue eyes that changed color with the weather. Despite his fear, he clung to that familiar safety. “You are. I’m just afraid. I’m really bad at love, Buck, and I can’t lose you.”
Buck’s breath audibly hitched. Eddie knew what he just admitted to, and in this tenuous, dynamic moment, he did not regret it.
After thinking for a minute, Buck replied. “You told me once about loving someone enough to never stop trying. Well, Eddie, I want to try. With you.”
Eddie rested their foreheads together. “Me, too. As long as you’ll have me.”