Chapter Text
It was a suspiciously nice day in Gotham as Jason strolled down the street on his way to the nearest grocery store. As he walked past an alleyway, he heard someone crying.
A little kid, about eight or nine, was huddled by some abandoned boxes and a dumpster. She rubbed her eyes and sniffed calming down only to freak out when she noticed Jason. “Stay back! No! Go away!”
“Hey it’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you,” Jason shushed, keeping some distance between himself and the girl.
“No! You have to stay back! I don’t want- Don’t touch me!” the girl shrieked hysterically, trying to meld into the brick walls of the alley.
Holding up his hands in the universal sign of surrender, Jason assured, “I’m not going to touch you. Calm down, deep breaths.”
The girl gulped. “Don’t- don’t come any closer.”
“I’m not,” he promised. “What’s your name?”
“M- I’m Mallory.” Watery brown eyes met Lazarus-green.
“Hey Mallory, I’m Jason. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on? Where are your parents?” Jason asked gently. He inched a bit closer, inspecting the kid’s attire of a plain T-shirt and jeans. Not torn or dirty, so she probably wasn’t a runaway or street kid.
“I got lost and hurt someone… that’s why you have to stay away! I don’t want- I don’t want to hurt you too!” Mallory exclaimed, hopping to her feet and running away.
“Hey wait! Mallory!” Jason called, quickly reaching out. His hand brushed Mallory’s bare arm and bright flash blinded him.When Jason came to, the alley looked a lot bigger. In fact, everything looked a lot bigger.
“I’m sorry! Stay back!” Mallory apologized frantically, disappearing from view as she rounded a corner.
He glanced down at himself. “What the hell?” he said, only for his words to come out as quacks. “Am I a freaking duck?”
“I can’t believe my luck,” Jason groaned. He was minding his own business for once. Well, sort of minding his own business. He wasn’t busting some criminal hideout or taunting a villain. He wasn’t prancing his siblings or messing with his dad again either. He didn’t even blow anything up this week!
Look, Jason may be a murderer but he wasn’t some kind of monster that turned a blind eye to scared kids. But usually helping them didn’t end up with Jason turning into a freaking duck. “I’ll have to look for Mallory later,” he decided and waddled his way out of the alley.
Jason Peter Todd. The second Robin. The Red Hood. Scourge of Gotham’s underworld. The boy who came back to life. The boy who lived had officially been turned into a duck. Jason shook his head in disbelief. “Only in Gotham…”
Jason held out his new arms? Wings? As he gave them an experimental flap, he considered his options for getting help. Flying was a risk but walking could end up with Jason being somebody’s dinner.
He hissed in frustration.
After an unspeakable number of tries, Jason finally got the hang of flying... sort of. He slammed into a window and landed on the fire escape with a thud. Hissing, Jason wobbled back to his feet. He quacked obnoxiously by the fire escape and tapped the window.
Tim sluggishly appeared on the other side of the glass, confused. “Timbo! Fix this!” Jason tried to say, but all that came out was more quacking.
“Huh,” was the only thing Tim said before passing out. Jason hit the glass frantically with his wings. Did Tim get hit with something? Was he hurt and hiding an injury again ?
Upon closer inspection, Tim has passed out from exhaustion if his obnoxious snores were anything to go by. Jason gave the kid a very unimpressed glare and moved on.
“Bruce! Dad!” Jason snapped, tripping his dad for the umpteenth time. His dad merely sighed and moved around him.
Jason flew up and bit his dad’s ear. “Pay attention to me!” Jason yelled internally.
Bruce yelped and wrangled his attacker off of him. He set the offending duck on the ground and said sternly, “No. I know Jason probably set you up to this -how he’s building a duck army to do his bidding I have no earthly idea - but no. Just no.”
Jason wanted to bite him again for that, but he huffed and let Bruce walk away. “Maybe I should start a duck army,” he mused before sighing, “Fine, if anyone can speak animal like a Disney Princess, it’d be Damian. Thanks a lot for nothing, B!”
Jason squawked, flapping his wings furiously, “For all you spout about being useful and all-knowing, you sure as hell aren’t being either of those now, demon brat!”
Like everyone else in his stupid family, Damian hummed and ignored Jason’s words. The kid squatted down to Jason’s level and started petting him, cracking a rare smile.
“Oh my gosh, of all times to smile. Why do you find joy in my suffering?” Jason grumbled, sitting down. He let out a content quack as nimble fingers through the feathers on his head and down to his back. Rolling his eyes, Jason indulged his younger brother as he tried to think of another way to tell his family that “Hello?? He was turned into a duck? A little help would be nice!”
“Uh Cass? Are you petting a duck?” Steph asked as she entered the room.
“Yes. This is Jason’s duck,” Cass replied, petting the said waterfowl who was contently sitting in Cass’s lap.
Jason groaned. Why is everyone in this family so fucking stupid? Family of detectives? More like a family of idiots with the intelligence and self-preservation instincts of a drunk squirrel.
Steph looked confused but joined Cass on her bed. “What was his name again?”
“Red Quack.”
Both girls started petting Jason. “I wonder why Jason’s duck is inside? You think Jason’s planning another prank or something? Where is he by the way? I haven’t seen him all day.”
“Not sure. He will come to dinner tonight though. Promised,” Cass answered. She gestured to the paused movie on her laptop that had been abandoned when Jason broke in. Read: flew face first into her window.
“Sure! What movie is this?”
“The Greatest Showman.”
“Yes, I love that movie!” Steph cheered, reaching over to restart the movie. As the music played and scratches continued, Jason yawned and let his eyes slowly drift shut. Surprisingly, flying took a lot of energy.
“Dick, I know you can see me,” Jason seethed at the doorway. The said human was eating a bowl of cereal with mayonnaise substituting the milk, sitting on the carpeted floor. “If Alfred was home, you’d be in so much trouble. Go buy some milk for goodness’s sake! It’s not like we can’t afford to buy replacements. Bruce is a goddamn billionaire and you have a salary! Heck you even have a trust fund!”
Dick just stared at him. “You’re a talkative fella aren’t you? How’d you get in here, little guy?”
“I’m taller than you!” Jason was seriously considering flying himself to the sun like Icarus. Maybe all these feathers would melt off and he’d turn back into a human. Or maybe he’d become a roast duck and saved from this misery.
“Do you want some cereal?” Dick offered, perplexed by the angry duck quacking viciously at him.
“You are the reason why I lost my faith in humanity, Dickhead,” Jason yelled as he flew away.
“You know what? Fine. If everyone’s going to treat this like a joke and ignore me, so be it, “ Jason decided, grumpily waddling to his room like a petulant child who was sent to bed one mintue earlier than their set bedtime.
He grabbed his current read from his new room that Alfred had set up when he started visiting the Manor more. Not the old one from his childhood. Too many... memories.
Dragging the heavy book down the hall, it took him quite some time to bring it to an isolated wing of the Manor. He found a dimly lit room with furniture protected by white sheets like in the 90’s horror movies. “Perfect,” Jason decided aloud, letting out a content quack.
By the time his book was safely nestled in his newest hiding spot, his bill was aching from dragging the heavy hardcover book.
He settled down in his nest of stolen blankets hidden by the white sheets draped over the coffee table. Flipping open the book, Jason began to read. Who knew ducks had night vision?