Chapter Text
It’s late summer when Asher takes them out of the city, along the country roads into the mountains.
He won’t tell them where they’re going, but the rest of the pack knows - and they catch the knowing glance Milo had thrown them when Asher had asked to borrow his dad’s old jeep, and they can guess that it has some significance to them.
But Milo doesn’t give anything away when he hands over the keys, a smile playing on his lips as he reminds Ash that the transmission sticks, and to call ahead when they’re on their way back.
Wherever they’re going, it’s a couple of hours drive from Dahlia, taking them through the forests that surround the city. The redwoods tower above the jeep, old and vast and beautiful.
But of all the things they’d been expecting when they finally arrived, it wasn’t this.
He’s brought them to a meadow. The wildflowers are in bloom, a carpet of colour stretching before them out towards the horizon, untouched by civilization. It’s beautiful, a little refuge away from everything, and it’s theirs, he explains, a small smile creasing the corners of his eyes as he watches them take everything in, gaze soft in the early morning light.
“This is where I first shifted. Where all the members of the pack make their first shift. Gabe - the original alpha… it was his place. Then David’s place after that.” His voice catches on the name, his eyes fixed on a point of the horizon. But still, his hand remains in theirs, holding tight. “Now it’s mine.”
He takes a deep, steadying breath, holding it for a long moment, before letting go.
“I wanted to bring you here. Show it to you. This is where we welcome the new members of the pack.”
He turns to face them, finding their gaze and holding it, and- oh.
Their heart thumps heavily inside their chest, once, twice. They can feel themselves trembling, and his hand finds theirs again and squeezes, reassuring.
“You’re one of us. You have been for a long time. But… I wanted to ask. If you’d join us.” He cracks a crooked grin. “Formally, I guess.”
His eyes on theirs are soft. They’ve grown so much softer in the time they’ve known him, flecks of blue and green bright in the late afternoon light. He’s beautiful, and they can barely breathe looking at him, a swell of emotion sitting high in their chest.
“But it’s - it’s not just that. There’s… more.” He breaks off, huffing out a laugh as he looks down at his shoes, the grasses of the meadow reaching their calves. “Fuck, I’m not good at this.”
“I care for you. A lot. Too fucking much. And I want you to stay with me. Always. But I know I’m not - mate material.” His tone turns sharp, self-deprecating, and he’s so wrapped up in his words that he doesn’t notice the way their breath catches in their throat. “I’m still pretty fucked up. There are parts of me missing that I don't think I will ever get back. Things that no amount of time, or healing, will change.”
“And you’re - you. Kind and caring and good. Too good for someone like me.”
“It would make sense if you didn’t want me back. Not in a long term kind of way. So - I’m not gonna ask you to be my mate, as if that’s some sort of barrier to you being pack. As it isn’t. You are pack. My pack.”
His eyes flicker shut as he turns away, his profile gilded by the sunlight.
“Just know… that if you ever wanted to be more… all you’d have to do is say the word.”
Fuck.
“Asher.” They finally find their words, taking a step forward to close the distance that’s grown between them, their hand raising to cup his cheek, tilting his head down to meet theirs.
He takes in another shaky breath before meeting their gaze. “Yeah?”
Their other hand raises to press against his chest, above his heart, as they trace their thumb along the curve of his cheek, pressing at the place where his dimple sits. They can feel the race of his heartbeat under their palm, echoing theirs.
“I care for you, too.” The idiot goes unsaid, but he catches it nonetheless, that dimple forming under their thumb. “But it’s more than that.”
If he can open up to them like this, then they can do the same for him, and they steel themselves to say it, all of it. He needs to hear it. They need him to hear it.
“I- I’m not perfect, Ash. I can’t say I know what will happen with us. With - anything.” The fall of the Meridian looms in their thoughts, an ever present threat - but they push it away, just this once. “But I do know one thing, and that’s my feelings for you. I love you.”
They can feel the stutter in his heartbeat as his breath leaves him in a long rush. “Fuck. You mean that?”
“Of course I do.” He grins, a crooked thing, soft and sweet enough to take their breath away. Their heart is beating so fast, they think it’s gonna burst out of their fucking chest, and shit.
“You don’t have to say it back. I just didn’t want you thinking-”
He moves almost too fast for them to follow, his hand cupping their jaw as he cuts them off mid sentence and crashes his mouth against theirs, and fuck. His kisses are heated, searching, as he closes any remaining distance between them, until all they can feel is him.
They’re both breathless when they break apart, wrapped around each other, and there’s that smile on his lips again, soft and so fucking sweet. “I love you, too. Fuck, I think I’ve loved you for a long time.”
They had a feeling, but to hear him say it? For the first time in a long time, their heart feels light. “So we’ll try this?”
“Yeah.” His eyes are bright, glittering in the sunlight as he releases a shaky breath. “Yeah. Me and you.”
Leaning in, he kisses them again, soft and slow. He tastes like summer, like the sun around them and sweet wildflowers, and they sigh when he pulls back, pressing soft kisses down their jaw to the line of their throat.
“Thank you. For - for everything.” His voice is soft, the words pressed into their skin, and they can feel the heat of his breath as their fingers tangle in his hair, holding him close.
It’s many hours before they return to the den.