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Somehow, he’d gotten permission from the hard-assed bastard to let Ichigo sing with him. It was closer to his younger brother than he’d gotten all week, thanks to Aizen’s interference. But for whatever reason, Aizen had agreed to let Ichigo accompany him on stage, provided that his servant, the stoic and emotionless Ulquiorra, come along to supervise. Hichigo suspected it had something to do with the fact that Aizen apparently didn’t quite know how to deal with him and his open hostility, and the fact that he enjoyed showing off his “Pet” to everyone else on this god-forsaken luxury space-station they’d all gathered at for an interplanetary conference. It was called the Yukinos Pleasure Station, and while it orbited Rakunda most of the time, it could function as a fully independent station outside the gravitational field of the planet.
‘Pet, my ass. He just enjoys the excuse to break what’s left of my baby brother, but hopefully, this will open his eyes a little bit more.’ The singer thought irritably as he finished changing into his costume; a pair of soft, loose black pants that rippled around his legs like water when he moved. His chest and arms were bare, all except for the Asian-style dragon that had been painted in gold all down the milky white skin of his torso. It started from under the top hem of his harem pants on the right side, and then it snaked around to the other side, and curved up his chest, where the head was imprinted on his right shoulder. It shimmered and glowed in even the dim lights of the dressing room. His long white hair, shot with temporary steaks of crimson, was done up in an intricate fashion, to expose the golden decoration on his back. Gold bangles circled his wrists and bare ankles, and gold earrings, decorated with black diamonds hung from his ears.
He glanced over his shoulder and grinned when he saw the profuse blush on his younger brother’s face. The orangette was currently having the exact same dragon painted on his chest by the two excellent make-up artists he’d brought with him from Rakunda, only in silver, and in reverse, like a mirror. Ichigo’s harem pants were going to be white, and the jewelry he was wearing were copies of the ones his brother was wearing, but again, these were silver, and they had white diamonds instead of black ones. His orange hair had been run through with streaks of black, and done up in the same way his brother’s had. He looked embarrassed, and distinctly nervous.
Hichigo came up to his little brother, who was trying his best to hold still for the artists, ignoring the silent Ulquiorra who had taken up residence in an out-of-the-way corner. “Lookin’ good, Ichi-brat.” He purred.
Ichigo’s brown eyes looked up at him, and his blush deepened, “I . . . I don’t know if I can do this, Hichi-nii.” He mumbled.
“You can do this. You’re going to do this. You’ve got as much talent as I do, so there’s no need to worry. It’ll be easy.” Hichigo replied flatly, smiling still. “I’ll be right there with you.”
Ichigo looked down at his hands, clenched in his lap. “What if . . . what if . . . he doesn’t approve . . . ? What if he gets angry . . . about the song . . . ?”
The elder of the two put his hands on his hips, careful to avoid smearing the still-drying paint on his skin, and gave his younger brother a flat stare, “What the hell is he going to get angry for? We’re singing a song that I wrote, and that you haven’t seen before today. If he’s going to get angry with someone, it’d be me.”
A look of abject terror flashed across Ichigo’s face, and his whole body tensed, causing the make-up artists to pause in their work, alarmed.
Hichigo waved a hand to tell them to continue, and then put a hand on Ichigo’s free shoulder, the shoulder that wasn’t being painted on. “Hey, think about it this way. We aren’t on Tengoku, he doesn’t have jurisdiction here. If anyone does, it’d be the Emperor of Rakunda, who’s actually a personal friend of mine. He wouldn’t let anything happen to me.”
“But I . . . .” Ichigo murmured, trying to force himself not to tremble.
“It’s going to be fine, Ichi. I promise. This is to help you. Just relax. Okay?”
~
It was to be the night’s main event. The famous Shirosaki Hichigo was to take the stage, and dazzle the leaders of more than forty planets and all their personal guests and attendants. Only, they had announced that the hotheaded Rakundan singer would be joined by his younger brother, Kurosaki Ichigo. People murmured in surprise and speculation, and said ‘Wait, isn’t that the name of Aizen-sama’s Pet?’
Aizen himself was sitting at a table near the stage, ignoring the curious, even suspicious stares people were giving him. He wanted to hear his Pet sing, even if it was a song his volatile older brother had written, as he had only gotten to hear him sing once before. His Pet didn’t have the professionalism or the trained skill in his singing voice that his elder sibling had, but there was something so earnest and somehow innocent in his voice that lended it the same beauty as someone who had been trained for this profession.
The lights dimmed, and over the PA system , in all the different languages spoken by the different planets, there was an announcement that the event was about to begin. People in the truly massive dining hall quieted and returned to their seats, waiting for the duo to appear on the white marble stage which was currently shrouded in darkness.
When the lights came on above the stage, they were a mixture of red and blue. The blue lights illuminated a figure shimmering silver, and the red captured a man dazzling with gold. It took Aizen a couple of seconds to figure out who was who, but he quickly realized that the one surrounded by the blue lights was his Pet, while the one awash with red was the elder brother. Their appearance was beautiful, and it was apparent that their costumes had been designed to mirror each other, make them exact opposites of one another, and he had to admit, he was liking the silver paint on the orangette’s fair skin and black color in his hair.
Music trembled out of the speakers, a somewhat harsh, but commanding melody and grabbed everyone’s attention. The two brothers started dancing, a simple but somehow dark pattern of movement that still mirrored what the other was doing, while remaining perfectly in sync. Hichigo took the first stanza. He looked as fierce and beautiful as he always did, the golden dragon painted on his skin only accentuating the brilliant gold of his irises.
“Hey you, look what you do to me
You bend and you bruise me
Why, you try to control me
But, you don't know me,”
“How come you just want to hurt me?
How come you just want to push me?
I can't ignore you anymore,”
Somehow, Aizen was very much aware that the pale haired man’s gaze and his sharp and scathing tone were directed solely towards him at the moment. He held in a sigh. As much as Shirosaki irritated him, and made him want to just do away with the man, there were a plethora of reasons why he couldn’t do that. Besides, it would have made Ichigo sad, and perhaps . . . might break him completely.
Even so, he knew Shirosaki was trying to help his beloved younger brother, in his own way. Ichigo never did talk to him openly, but always acted fluttery and shy, terrified of saying or doing something wrong, always telling him what he thought he wanted to hear.
“Cause everywhere I turn you
You burn me, you break me
You always want to take me down with you
What do you want from me?”
Aizen could hear the genuine emotion his Pet put into the words of his part. His pain, confusion, and his fear. And . . . it pained him, inside his chest.
The voices of the two brother’s joined together for the chorus, a haunting, two-part harmony, with Hichigo’s slightly deeper, darker voice acting as the undertone for Ichigo’s lighter, sweeter voice.
“I don't wanna be afraid,
I don't wanna run away
I don't want to be here fading,
It's more that I can take
I'm never gonna be the same
I threw it all away
I don't want to be here fading
Just let go! (Look what you do to me)
Let go! (Look what you do to me)”
The chorus spoke of being released, of escaping, of wanting to get out from underneath the crushing weight of desolation and solitude. It was Hichigo’s vow, and Ichigo’s plea. The brown haired lord knew that the reason behind this duet went far deeper than what either of them was experiencing now, that it stemmed from emotions and experiences only enhanced by their current situations.
He was not willing to release Ichigo, to give him the freedom he knew the orange haired teen so desperately desired. But he did want to make the boy happy, as happy as he could under the circumstances. If he only knew how . . . .
“Hey you, look what you do to me
You burnt and you scared me
With all that you tell me (but I don't listen!)”
While he still believed that the majority of Shirosaki’s words were aimed at him, this time, the white haired male’s song felt less direct, as though he wasn’t the only person the singer wanted to speak to through his songs. He knew from what he’d gleaned from the conversations between the brothers that Hichigo had left Tengoku, and somehow hit it big on Rakunda. However, the space between when he’d left and when he’d made his debut was shrouded in mystery and shadows. Not even Ichigo knew what his brother had experienced in those years. If anyone did know, it would have been that Pet he’d bought, fell in love with, and freed.
But from his words and his intensity, it was likely that he had suffered greatly, at the hands of others.
“You love me, you hate me
You always want to take me down with you
What do you want from me?”
This song . . . . why Ichigo seemed so genuine on stage, when at his side, the teen seemed so closed and afraid . . . Aizen understood. This was Ichigo’s way of telling him exactly what he was feeling, exactly what he was thinking, exactly what it was that plagued him, day and night, and made him seem so timid and scared. This was why he was breaking.
“I don't wanna be afraid
I don't wanna run away
I don't want to be here fading
It's more that I can take
I'm never gonna be the same
I threw it all away
I don't want to be here fading
Just let,”
Their voices stopped, suddenly, and faint guitar riffs could be heard, and the lights intensified and narrowed, a single beam of brilliant blood-red light focusing in on Hichigo, who stood frozen, his face shadowed, his gold-on-black eyes blazing out from under his hair, in a way that was both entrancing, as well as creepy.
Ichigo was trapped in a pillar of deep cobalt blue light, his natural beauty only extenuated by the cool color, the silver dragon painted on his chest glistening ice-blue, his chocolate brown eyes filled with an unnaturally bright gleam.
“You kept pushing me
You keep using me
You keep twisting me
You keep breaking me
You can't have me anymore
You can't have me anymore
You can't have me anymore
You can't have me, let go!”
Hichigo’s voice took over the first part of the bridge. His voice was almost demonic in is whispered, almost screamed tone, but it defiantly drove a dagger into the hearts of those listening. His voice was fueled by anger, by some sort of long-carried pain he’d kept inside him.
“I don't wanna be afraid,
I don't wanna run away
I don't want to be here fading
It's more that I can take,”
Ichigo’s voice was brought out by his own emotions, his sense of loss, his aching despair, his plea for understanding, for release from all the terror and agony he found himself buried in. His broken state was giving his voice strength and fullness. The two of them were united by their pain.
“I'm never gonna be the same
I threw it all away
I don't want to be here fading
Just let go! Let go! Just let go!
I don't wanna be afraid
Let go! (I don't wanna run away!)
Just let go! Let go! Let go!”
Amidst the cheers and wild cried of acclimation and praise for their glorious work, Aizen Sousuke, ruler of Tengoku, owner of the Pet known as Kurosaki Ichigo, couldn’t help but notice that neither of the performers were smiling. Ichigo gazed out at the crowd, straight towards him, his expression somewhat sad, but otherwise unreadable.
Hichigo went up to his younger brother, and drew him into a close embrace, in which Ichigo buried his face into the crook of his elder brother’s neck, and left Aizen wondering . . . if he would ever be able to hold Ichigo like that, and not have to feel him tremble with fear or sorrow.