Chapter Text
“See you…”
Bakugo felt a smile pulling at the corner of his lips while watching Midoriya’s green curls dance in the wind. Absentmindedly, his arm continued to wave as Midoriya returned the gesture and continued down the walkway. His form became smaller and smaller before being completely enveloped by pedestrians crossing from both sides. Bakugo’s slight grin slowly evaporated, and his hand began to lower. Instead of returning to his side, he found it outstretched and reaching into the void where Midoriya stood just a short time ago. Fingers twitched and trembled in his friend’s direction before words finally broke free from Bakugo’s hesitation and spilled over his lips.
“…Come back…”
The words were whispered under his breath as all background noise faded, and a ring began to fill his ears. The low and subtle sound grew in intensity until it reached a feverish pitch. Bakugo’s red pupils darted between both sides of the sidewalk and expected that damn nerd to appear from the crowd with his infectiously bright smile. As the desperate thought began to fade, his mind fogged with an unknown feeling. He struggled to identify what was going on. Bakugo swore his watch vibrated with a warning about his rapidly increasing heart rate.
“Hey, man! Are you ready?”
Bakugo’s nervousness was banished back to whatever hideous hellscape it had spawned from as he felt Kirishima’s arm sling over his shoulder. The sharp-toothed smile on the redhead’s face quickly dissipated.
“Woah… everything good?”
Kirishima’s red eyes widened with concern as they caught his friend gazing into the abyss. Bakugo shook his head before darting his attention away from Kirishima’s gaze.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“I said I’m fine!”
A faint glimmer of sparks ignited in Bakugo’s palms, causing Kirishima to throw up his hands in defense and take a measured step backwards.
“Just checking! No need to get all explode-y on me...”
Kirishima lowered his hands before shrugging and walking back towards Ashido.
“It’s no wonder you can’t find a sidekick,” Kirishima muttered just out of earshot.
Ashido asked a question that Bakugo was unable to hear, causing him to deem their conversation irrelevant. He gave a final glance down the sidewalk and hoped for some miraculous reason that Midoriya would be standing there once more. He turned from the empty pavement and followed behind the duo.
As the two conversed, Bakugo lingered shortly behind. Whatever had caused him to lock up no longer had control over his thoughts, but he still found himself unable to precisely identify what had just occurred. He slowly raised a hand and glared down at his scared palms. Bakugo rolled his fingers individually and struggled to comprehend why they had frozen just mere moments before.
“Hey, Bakugo! What do you think?”
He looked up to find they had stopped in front of a bar. The large neon sign buzzed overhead and bathed the trio in a somber, pink glow. A cartoon cowboy illuminated between different frames of tipping his hat and giving a wink.
“If the two of you want to get trashed at some dump, then go ahead. Don’t let me stop you from getting drunk on some cheap, imported American piss water.”
Kirishima snickered and curled an arm around Bakugo’s.
“Oh, come on, stop being such a drag,” he spoke with a laugh while dragging the blond towards the building. “We’ll be just a little bit. Besides, you really look like you need to get something in your system.”
Ashido let out a high-pitched squeal and clapped her hands together.
“Please, Bakugo! Pleeeaasssee?”
The unpleasant begging made Bakugo lash out and explode a small fireball on Kirishima’s arm. His friend’s skin hardened and absorbed the blast.
“I said no, you fucking pointy-toothed bastard!”
Kirishima dropped his efforts with a defeated sigh and Ashido pouted. Without another word, Bakugo turned to leave the area while tossing his car keys in the air. Kirishima still had a gut feeling that something was not quite right with his friend’s behavior. He jogged to catch up and Ashido rolled her eyes before doing the same.
“Fine, you win, but can you at least give us a ride back home?”
Kirishima’s question caught Bakugo off guard. The blond ceased walking and stood in silence for a moment.
“Are you two bums too lazy to walk?”
“You do realize we can’t all explode ourselves through the sky? We and all the other commonwealths have to walk,” Kirishima let out with a snicker.
Bakugo tried to stare at them with disdain, but Kirishima noticed his eyes lacked the full sting that usually flared behind those red pupils.
“Ugh, fine,” Bakugo begrudgingly let out while tossing the key fob into the air.
Kirishima took the small victories with Bakugo where he could and pumped his fist in celebration. He and Ashido followed Bakugo, and she gave a glance over her shoulder to bid a depressing farewell to the neon cowboy as it gave her a wink.
As they continued towards the parking lot, Bakugo found his mind wandering back to the farewell with Midoriya. As much as he tried to force himself to suppress it, the image of green hair vanishing into a swarm of pedestrians continued to play on repeat in his mind. Multiple times along the way, Bakugo felt his wrist vibrate as his watch buzzed to warn of an increased heart rate. He ignored it.
“Who am I taking home first,” he asked once they finally reached his vehicle.
“Ashido is on the way to my place, so I guess drop her off first.”
“Fine.”
Bakugo pressed the ignition button, and the engine roared to life with a rumble. As they pulled out of the parking lot and onto the highway, the gentle rumble from the road almost immediately put Ashido to sleep. Her head rested against the rear pillar, and a gentle snore could soon be heard emitting from the back seat. Bakugo reached for the volume knob and turned up the music. Whatever station it happened to be on did not matter to him. All he cared about was filling the silence and avoiding conversation.
Kirishima pretended to be occupied by the passing cityscape outside his window but would occasionally give side glances to his friend. Bakugo’s crimson eyes stared at the road, his facial muscles relaxed and unbothered for the first time that Kirishima could remember in quite some time.
“Yeah, I’m fine”
Bakugo’s words echoed through the redhead’s mind. No matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise, Kirishima knew that something was digging at him. The phantom glow of streetlights danced in Bakugo’s eyes, and his friend remained quite the entire ride home as the radio drowned out any awkwardness.
Eventually, the car pulled up to the curb outside of an apartment complex. Bakugo put the vehicle in park and climbed out to walk Ashido inside the building. Kirishima watched as the blond assisted her out of the backseat and escorted her to the front door. As he made sure she arrived safely inside to the security guard, Kirishima realized a window of opportunity was open and quickly closing in front of him. As Bakugo turned from the revolving glass door, he found Kirishima stepping out to the curb.
“What the hell are you doing,” Bakugo asked with stinging aggravation.
Kirishima could tell his tone still lacked any real threat behind it.
“I know I’m just a couple of blocks up the street, but I figured I’d save you the trouble and walk. I thought it would be easier for you instead of making you drive further and then turn back to go home.
Bakugo froze and stared at Kirishima with a neutral gaze before walking around him and back to the driver side door.
“Whatever. Do what you want.”
Kirishima’s jaw dropped slightly. He expected some sort of angry response, even if it did not warrant the threat of any real action. Hearing such a blow-off retort was unexpected.
“Katsuki, wait.”
He reached out to grab his friend’s arm, causing Bakugo to swivel and immediately swatted the hand away with disgust. As Kirishima’s face sagged, Bakugo’s stern demeanor faltered. His eyes widened slightly, and Bakugo looked at his friend with as close to an apology as he could muster.
A cold silence hung in the air.
“Are you sure that you’re alright,” Kirishima asked. He was unable to keep the stinging pain from bleeding into his voice.
Bakugo flinched at the realization of what he had done. Not knowing how to alleviate the situation, he let his shoulders sag with defeat.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he let out with a heavy breath. “I’m just tired and need to get some sleep.”
As Bakugo climbed back into his car, Kirishima gave a wave and slight smile that Bakugo ignored. The car revved again before speeding off under the streetlights. Kirishima stood motionless on the sidewalk as the taillights faded into the night.
Bakugo spun the volume knob hard to the left and drove home in complete silence. He eventually reached the sanctuary of his complex’s garage and backed the car into his numbered spot. Killing the engine, he stepped out and grabbed the duffle bag containing his hero suit. Bakugo slung the strap over his shoulder while giving a quick glance to the “CLASS 1A” custom license plate mounted to the car’s bumper. A honk signaled the vehicle was locked, and he continued to the elevators.
As he pressed the up button and waited for one to arrive, the lobby became dimly lit by the green arrow signaling an elevator was on its way to him. He became increasingly impatient and convinced that the color was mocking him. The doors finally opened, and Bakugo smashed the button for his floor. It hummed as the carriage jolted towards the upper floors. Bakugo caught his reflection in the mirrored walls. Red eyes stared back at him with what he could only identify as the slight look of defeat.
A weak electric chime echoed in the cramped space and the doors slid open with a groan. Bakugo stepped out and turned the corner towards his unit. He approached the door and stopped to stare down at the “Go Away” door mat. The gift from Todoroki usually brought at least a little light entertainment to Bakugo, but he simply stared at it with neutrality.
Beep
His door unlocked with a keycard held to it. Stepping inside, Bakugo dumped the bag from his shoulder onto a bench by the doorway and strolled towards the kitchen. Along the way, he stepped on the heels of his shoes and tossed them to random spots on the floor. Lights flickered to life as Bakugo proceeded down the hallway until he reached the kitchen overlooking his living room.
He immediately went to the refrigerator and opened the doors. After glancing over its contents, he was unable to convince himself that anything was worth eating and closed it. Unscrewing the cap on a bottle by the sink edge, he popped one of the heart medications before turning his head under the faucet. He swallowed after a couple of gulps before wiping his mouth with the back of his wrist.
Beep
The heart monitor on his watch sounded in an almost mocking fashion.
“Shut the fuck up! I didn’t even do anything!”
He ripped the canvas strap off his wrist and slammed it down on a charging pad at the edge of the counter. The watch turned green and blipped at Bakugo with a comical chirp. He stared at the lightning bolt symbol for what felt like minutes before snapping back to reality. His gaze eventually diverted to his liquor cabinet and the glassware glistening under the accent lighting.
Without realizing it, a rocks glass was soon clenched tightly in his grasp. Bakugo’s eyes darted between the various labels that populated his small collection. Spare a few bottles of his own choosing, most of the assortment was compiled of random gifts whose origins had long since fled his memory. He rarely touched any of it, and most of the bottles had developed a thin film of dust. One eventually caught Bakugo’s attention that he had received after his agency officially opened.
I don’t know much about whiskey, Kacchan, but I’ve heard that this one is surprisingly good!
Bakugo’s eyes fell on the beige label speckled with cherry blossoms. He stared at the bottle before eventually grabbing it from the ledge. He proceeded to grab a few ice cubes from the freezer and let them clink into the glass. It was moments like these that he wished Todoroki were there to freeze the glasses and chill the liquor in an instant like he had done at numerous parties. Regardless, he let the amber liquid spill over the ice and proceeded to take the glass and bottle into the living room.
Without awareness, Bakugo gulped half of the drink before setting it down on an end table. He turned on his speaker system and sat on the edge of the cushions. He scrolled through the music library on his phone before eventually tapping on a song. The strum of an acoustic guitar filled the room as he collapsed into the cushions. Taking another large gulp, his eyes stared beyond the stereo and over the bustling street below his building.
“…Put your hands on the wheel, let the golden age begin…”
Bakugo groaned and ran a hand through his blond spikes. That wretched feeling began to creep back, causing him to take another large sip in a fruitless attempt to keep it at bay. Ice cubes chattered against his teeth as he drained the remains of his drink. He grabbed the bottle and dumped another considerable pour into the glass. The bottle rested back on the end table without Bakugo caring about the spillage that ended up on the floor and part of the upholstery.
“…Gotta drive all night just to feel like you’re okay…”
Bakugo’s sips became sloppier as the last one left whiskey running down one corner of his mouth. He wiped it away with his wrist and a slight mutter of disgust.
The image of Midoriya waving goodbye repeated in his mind’s eye, causing Bakugo to immediately try and suppress the memory. He threw back his head and dumped the entirety of the glass’ contents in his mouth. Bakugo felt another stream of liquid running down his chin, causing him to aggressively wipe it from his face. The dried path was soon replaced with more as Bakugo was stunned to find that he was not wiping away whiskey, but hot tears. He froze for a moment before wiping his eyes with the back of his arm. Bakugo’s jaw clenched and teeth gritted together as he struggled to comprehend his sudden emotional freefall.
“…Oh-oh…These days I barely get by…”
He twirled the empty glass in his fingers and watched the light refract in its intricate pattern. More tears ran down his cheeks, and Bakugo suddenly hurled the glass at the floor, causing shards of glass to scatter across the hardwood. He watched the chunks settle in various corners of the living room without a care about having to clean them up in the morning.
“…I don’t even try…”
Bakugo grabbed the bottle by the neck and took a swig. The throbbing behind his eyes had faded by this point but had instead been replaced by an ache in his chest. He ran his fingers on the shirt above his scar and let out a deep sigh. A few more hot tears trickled down his face. He wiped them away with aggravation.
“…I don’t even try…”