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Vi pressed the door to the bathroom open with her forearm, peering inside. “Cait?”
The inside of the bathroom was quiet, with a jarring amount of fluorescent light that contrasted the dark gym’s pinks and purples. The green stall doors were uniformly closed and went lower to the floor than usual, so it was hard to tell which ones were occupied.
She stepped all the way inside to see Caitlyn popping out of a stall in the middle.
Her hair was down and messy like she’d been running her hands through it, and she wore a shimmering navy dress with a halter neckline. She looked at Vi with tired eyes but her expression was fond. “Thank you for coming,” she said with a timid smile.
Vi smiled back and gestured with her head, still holding the door open. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”
Every movement of their shoes echoed off the tile as Caitlyn walked over. Vi gave a dramatic wave of her hand. “Ladies first.” Caitlyn chuckled at that as she leaned forward through the door and back into the loud gym.
The whole reason Vi came to get Caitlyn in the first place was so she could avoid Maddie. From their texts she parsed out that Maddie had been acting strangely close with Caitlyn but never being direct with her. She didn’t give the specifics though, so Vi wasn’t sure where Maddie was on the scale from irrelevant to punchable. Nevertheless, she came over to Caitlyn’s side to hide her and watch for annoying gingers.
Luckily, most people were either tearing up the dance floor or chatting by the sad looking snack table, so they went by pretty much undetected. A few people waved to Vi as they walked along the back wall, but nobody came up to talk to them or stopped them from leaving.
Caitlyn scoured the crowd with pursed lips and a furrowed brow as they walked together. Almost to the exit, Vi spotted a less than chipper Maddie talking to some blue haired guy on the outside fringes of the crowd of dancers. The girl caught Vi in her vision as she was reaching for the door. Vi thought of a few crude gestures she could give, but decided against it. She didn’t need to deal with Maddie when she was supposed to be supporting Caitlyn.
A push of the heavy doors and they were free of the suffocating atmosphere of the gym. The cold October night was a much better alternative. Caitlyn sighed next to her and rubbed her arms. They walked along the sidewalk beside the large parking lot in silence.
“So how’s your night going?” Caitlyn asked as she scanned the rows of cars. Her jaw was tight and her posture was stiffer than normal (not that there was much room for improvement).
“Better than yours, I think,” said Vi. She hoped humor was the right move to get Caitlyn to relax. “But not by much. It’s so boring in there.”
Caitlyn huffed gently, her breath swirling in the cold air. “I bet you wish you were at one of those so-called ‘worse dates’ you were talking about earlier.”
“Yeah. A funeral would go so hard right now,” she said, bumping Caitlyn’s shoulder with her own. “Speaking of earlier,” Vi paused to take in Caitlyn’s still agitated state, “would you like to speak about it? You don’t look super over it.”
She sighed, “It’s not like Maddie’s doing anything wrong, it’s just… I need to be direct with her. It’s a lot to get into. You’ve got the gist of it through my texts. I wanted to keep the peace because we’re doing a partner project together in International Law right now but it’s just terrible for both of us.” Caitlyn kept her eyes on the cars as they walked past them.
“Anyways, I don’t want to think about it any more tonight,” she said. “She’s a problem for Monday. Which one is your car?”
Vi could work with that. She wasn’t the best at giving advice or comfort when it came to people problems, but she could sure as hell do distractions. Of course, if Caitlyn wanted her advice she’d become better than a magazine girl-problems advice column. She would really do almost anything to help her. But she was glad it was already in her wheelhouse.
“Right over there,” Vi said, pointing across the parking lot to a beat up red sedan. “My pride and joy.”
“Really? I always thought you’d be the type to have a truck.”
Vi smiled, “I’m full of surprises.” She put her hands in the back pockets of her dress pants. “My dad helped me save up for a car as my 16th birthday gift. I got my first job at this little ice cream place and a few months later I saw this baby at a used car dealership and took it. I don’t care what kind of car I have as long as it’s got good memories.”
“It must be nice to have that much autonomy. I practically had to beg my mother to let me get my license and I have to borrow my father’s car if I want to drive anywhere myself.” Caitlyn ran her hand over the car’s hood when they got to it. Her fingers stopped to examine where the paint had been chipped and then covered with a stroke of bright blue.
Vi unlocked the car with her key fob, opened the driver’s side door, and gestured for Caitlyn to get into the passenger’s side. “Yeah, that’s rough.” A pause. “At least they can’t tell you what to do during a dance, right?”
“I wouldn’t put it past them honestly,” Caitlyn replied with a laugh. She ran her hands over her own arms again and leaned back into the seat. “It’s really just my mother who’s overprotective. My father goes along with it because she knows how to work a hunting rifle better than he does.”
Vi chuckled back while reaching into the depths of the back seat, then brought out a black sweatshirt and offered it to Caitlyn. She looked at it tentatively until Vi said, “You looked cold.”
Caitlyn looked up to Vi, then back to the sweatshirt with a smile. She cautiously lifted it out of Vi’s hands and slowly slid one arm into the sleeve and then the other. Vi had to keep a poker face after seeing the open back of the dress before the black fabric covered it. Caitlyn’s slightly toned back was not something she was expecting to see up close and personal. Not that she was complaining.
“Thank you,” Caitlyn said, wrapping her arms around herself.
They sat in silence for a minute as Vi contemplated what to say. On one hand, she could keep going with the funny angle to see if she could get Caitlyn to loosen all the way up.
On the other hand, Cait looked so gorgeous in her sweatshirt with pink cheeks from the cold that it was hard to ignore. This slightly messier version of her felt so real and personal, like an invitation to know her past her many facades. She wanted to tell Caitlyn how much that meant to her, maybe accented with a confession of undying love or two.
But it didn’t seem like the right moment to reveal any of that, so instead Vi stuck with being incredibly amazing and funny. “Are you sad you’re missing out on the slow dancing,” she asked, leaning her head to the side.
“Oh God no,” Caitlyn groaned. She tucked her hair behind her ear.
“Are you sure,” Vi prodded. “‘Cause you seem like you were really hyped for it.” She pulled out her phone from her back pocket to queue up a song.
“What are you doing?” Caitlyn tried to look over at Vi’s phone but she pulled it away to hide the screen. “Seriously, show me!”
Vi giggled as she slid her back to rest up against the inside of the car door, legs up as defense. “Bringing the slow dance to you,” she exclaimed as she tapped on her phone and Ed Sheeran’s “Perfect” started to play.
Caitlyn slapped Vi’s calf with a snicker. “Turn that off!” Vi held her phone as far away from Caitlyn as she could as she reached for it.
“Never,” Vi yelled as she pushed Caitlyn away with her knees. Adrenaline rushed into Vi’s chest as she realized this was going to be a whole duel. She waved the phone around wildly to taunt Caitlyn, which just made her more ambitious. She tried to use Vi’s left knee as leverage to reach the phone, but Vi jolted her leg to the side to make her fall.
Vi realized that was maybe not the best move, seeing that Caitlyn had fallen into her and she could feel her nose pressing into her abdomen. She felt her heartbeat accelerate as Caitlyn pushed herself up, unsure of what to do next. Caitlyn definitely would’ve sensed the energy shift Vi went through in that split second given her very obvious hitched breath. Yep, her eyebrows were halfway up her forehead and her ears were going pink. Shit.
That brought her back to the decision before—play it safe with comedy or risk it all with romance?
Luckily, Caitlyn decided for them before Vi could have a brain aneurysm about it. Her determined expression returned as she pushed herself even more far forward to reach for Vi’s phone. Accepting the challenge, Vi held her phone as high as her arms could go, but Caitlyn’s arms were longer. She had to outsmart her instead.
Quickly, Vi leaned to her left to make Caitlyn’s stance unstable, pushing her chest up with her free forearm to get her to back off. While Caitlyn regained balance, Vi leaned further to slide her phone to rest by the brake pedal. She came up with her palms out to show Caitlyn she’d won. “You can try but you’ll never silence the power of overplayed slow dance music.”
Caitlyn finally gave up, sitting back in her own seat and resting her elbows on the center console. “I hope you know you’ve just killed the mood.” She leaned her chin into her palms.
“I really feel like I just made it better,” Vi said, crossing her arms.
“Yeah, it’s bringing me back to sixth grade winter formal when I had the most horrible first kiss imaginable. My favorite.” Caitlyn enunciated her statement with an eye roll. Her hair was even messier now and she looked so cozy in Vi’s jacket.
Vi nudged Caitlyn’s arm with her knee. “Oh, you wanna talk horrible first kisses? You’ll never beat mine.”
Caitlyn nudged Vi’s knee back. “Please, enlighten me.”
“Well,” Vi said, reaching down to retrieve her phone. “Hold on for a sec.” She tapped the screen a few times and looked cheekily up at Caitlyn as the song ended and the same song started again.
She laughed as Caitlyn looked at her incredulously. “Again,” Caitlyn asked while holding back laughter. Her eyes were soft and strikingly blue in the warm light from the parking lot.
“I had to keep the mood going! Anyways,” Vi shifted back into her seat and let her legs relax by the pedals, “my first kiss was in fifth grade, and first of all it was with a boy.” Caitlyn mouthed an “ew” as she tucked back into her own seat, crossing her arms and leaning one shoulder against the seat back so she faced Vi. “I know, gross. He definitely had cooties or whatever. But it was at a friend’s birthday party and she made us all play spin the bottle, and I got him—and mind you this was pre side-shave—so he just goes up to me and grabs both sides of my hair. He’s just straight up yanking on my hair while we’re kissing!”
Caitlyn tilted her head back in laughter, which made Vi join in. “Okay, you had a worse first, but I bet I’ve had worst overall,” Caitlyn said. She paused in thought, a ghost of a smile still on her face. “Hm… there was this one time that I snuck a girl in through my window, and it was our first kiss together and she led with full tongue. Like actually just licked my lips like a dog.”
“Wow, I didn’t know you were in the business of sneaking girls in,” Vi said, eyeing Caitlyn up and down with one eyebrow raised. Caitlyn just giggled and gestured for Vi to pause.
“I don’t do that anymore. But there’s more to the story! I was shocked to say the least, but I did actually like her so I gave it another go… and then my mother walked in.” She hid her chuckle with the hand that was out before. “I got in so much trouble for that.”
Vi wasn’t really aware that she’d made them start talking about kissing until this point. Well, obviously she knew what words were coming out of her mouth, but she missed the implication given the push and pull of tension and comedy that they had going on. But Caitlyn seemed to be enjoying herself, and Vi would talk like this to any of her other friends. She could do this and not make it awkward.
“I’ll do you one better. I was making out with a random girl and she was definitely sick, but she didn’t tell me and it was dark so I had no idea, until I felt the snot dripping out of her nose.” Vi brought her hand up to her forehead in embarrassment. “And wouldn’t you know, two days later I had to stay home from school ‘cause I got a cold.”
Caitlyn pondered again for a second before putting on a cocky smirk. “Hm… what about in a grimy public bathroom?”
“Disgusting. But it’s better than getting too handsy on the theater sex couch. I don’t even act!”
“Not as bad as getting wet nail polish in my mouth.” Caitlyn put a hand up again as Vi took a breath to interject. “Don’t ask.”
Vi sat up a little bit to prepare for her takeover. “Okay, you’re really asking for the big guns then. I ended up at this bonfire at the beach and this girl was eyeing me the whole time, so we walked along the beach to find somewhere not in front of everyone and we ended up by this rock that was literally in the water. Sand everywhere. And I got salt water in my hair and eyes from the waves splashing against the rock.”
Caitlyn rolled her eyes again. “That’s not that bad.”
“That’s ‘cause it’s the tame part. When we started walking back, a flock of seagulls flew over us and we both got mega pooped on. Then she started freaking out and crying because of the bird poop, and I didn’t know what to do so we just kept going. Then when we got back she ran over to her girlfriend, who she explicitly told me she was not dating, and told her the whole story while I was right there!”
“Damn,” Caitlyn said with a sly grin. Then she saw Vi trying to hold back a fit of laughter and they both fell apart.
“I know,” Vi said in between laughs. She curled into her seat, hand over her mouth. The laughter fizzled out with sighs as they collected themselves. Vi took a moment to admire the trees past the sidewalk through the windshield. Then she turned back to look at Caitlyn and it was all over as soon as they locked eyes.
Caitlyn slapped her knee and looked away to her own window, body shaking with quiet laughter. The sweatshirt was barely secure on one shoulder, showing the strap of the dress and all of the glitter that had transferred over to the soft black fabric on the inside. Vi couldn’t even bring herself to mourn the glitterfication.
“How do you have so many stories about bad kisses,” Caitlyn asked while wiping a tear out of the corner of her eye. “It’s honestly just sad at this point.”
Vi shrugged and shook her head. “I don’t know! I just keep showing up at parties and all these girls wanna kiss me, it’s wild.”
“Well then, maybe I should start throwing parties,” Caitlyn said nonchalantly as she leaned back into her seat and stared out of the windshield. Her ability to flip from messy to composed like a light switch was jarring, but also badass.
“Why? So girls will kiss you or so I’ll show up?”
Caitlyn looked at Vi through the corner of her eye. “You’ll have to find out when I start throwing parties.”
Vi leaned closer to Caitlyn, resting her elbow on the center console. She studied Caitlyn’s eyes as she whispered, “I’d rather find out now.”
Caitlyn gave her a coy smile as she turned and leaned tantalizingly closer. Everything about her enveloped Vi’s mind. Her eyes wide and so, so blue, with slightly smudged mascara. Her hair that was now even messier after fighting for the phone. Her lips covered in a tasteful fig colored gloss. All of her.
“Someone’s impatient,” Caitlyn whispered back. She stayed there like there was an invisible console-sized barrier keeping them apart.
Vi leaned in a fraction closer, intentionally looking down at Caitlyn’s lips and slowly back up to her eyes. Caitlyn was focused on something past Vi’s face. As Vi started to look at what Caitlyn’s gaze was fixed on, Caitlyn threw her upper body into the driver’s seat, reaching for the phone. She was practically laying in Vi’s lap by the time she managed to actually grab the phone despite Vi’s attempts to kick her hand away.
With the phone clutched to her chest, Caitlyn turned fully on her back, winked right up at Vi, and scrambled back to her seat.
Vi barked out a laugh and said, “You fuckin’ tease,” as Caitlyn tapped on the phone screen, hiding the contents with her left hand.
Caitlyn tried to nonchalantly look up at Vi, but she gave into a giddy smile when their eyes met. “Password?”
If Vi was mentally stronger, she probably would’ve tried to get her phone back, but Caitlyn’s strategies were working on her. “2008,” she said with a sigh. She acquiesced only to calm her pounding heartbeat before Caitlyn put her into cardiac arrest.
Caitlyn raised an eyebrow. “You’re that young?”
“Nah, that’s the year my car was made.” Vi patted the dashboard of the car. She moved her hands to the bottom of the steering wheel and tapped her fingers there as she waited for Caitlyn to finish whatever she was doing with her phone.
There was something new between them now. Even though that had all been a ploy for more mischief, Vi could tell there was sincerity behind Caitlyn’s words. She didn’t know if they could go all the way back to normal with the thought that they could actually kiss lingering in the air.
The song changed to something more subdued, with soft guitar and sparse percussion. “There,” Caitlyn said as she set the phone into the cupholder. Vi looked back out through the windshield as she listened to the song. She swayed a little to the beat as the chords ebbed and flowed. She closed her eyes as the chorus came up, then raised an eyebrow and turned to Caitlyn.
“Is this the song from Twilight?” Caitlyn laughed and nodded. “Seriously?”
“It’s better than what you were playing,” she replied.
Vi knew Caitlyn was right, but she took a moment to listen and consider. “Okay, fine. It’s better.”
Caitlyn’s expression softened as they paused their conversation. Her eyes flickered between each of Vi’s. Her mouth parted slightly so Vi could see the slight gap in between her front teeth. She felt Caitlyn’s fingertips touch her shoulder and slide to feel the collar of her barely pink dress shirt.
“You look good in this outfit by the way,” Caitlyn murmured. Her eyes wandered down to where her thumb and pointer finger grasped the material of the collar. The first few buttons of the shirt were undone, leaving the collar looser and more outward. Caitlyn rested the back of her hand against Vi’s chest as she held onto the collar.
“What are you doing,” Vi asked through a small lopsided smile.
Caitlyn looked back to Vi and bit the inside of her lip so the movement was just visible. She tilted her head to the side. “What do you think I’m doing?”
Her hand gracefully flipped over to rest on Vi’s shoulder, rubbing her thumb against her collarbone. Vi, eager to make Caitlyn’s stomach flutter the same way she had done to her, reached over to adjust the jacket’s sleeve back over Caitlyn’s shoulder. She kept her hand there to mimic her. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”
At that, Caitlyn huffed and leaned just barely forward. Vi knew she was doing all this to tease her, but that didn’t stop it from working. Instead, Vi found herself leaning just a bit forward too, stuck at that invisible barrier.
Now that it was a game of follow the leader, Caitlyn took pleasure in having Vi copy her every move. First, the other hand came up to the shoulder, but closer to the neck so that the thumb could rub against it. Then a tilt of the head and another slight lean in. Then the first hand moving to cup the cheek, fingers curving around past the jaw and into hair.
Caitlyn kept them like that for an everlasting moment. Their eyes communicated all of their wants and wishes, stripping away whatever emotional walls they once had. Vi leaned her face into Caitlyn’s hand and sighed, hoping it conveyed the overwhelming affection she had for the girl in front of her.
This wasn’t just a kiss to Vi. It was a promise that they were something more than friends that flirted. It wasn’t casual. She didn’t want it to be casual, at least, because the more she got to know Caitlyn the more she knew they fit together. She needed to know that Caitlyn knew that too, that she wasn’t like any other girl Vi had kissed one time and then forgotten about.
The corner of Vi’s lips tilted up about as subtly as they could as she poured all of her feelings out through her gaze.
“Are you actually gonna kiss me this time,” she pleaded.
Caitlyn’s thumb rubbed against her cheek. “Yeah. I am.”
They pulled each other in delicately, breaking the border Caitlyn had set in her teasing, until Vi could bump their foreheads together by just tilting her head. Caitlyn’s breath was warm and it smelled like mint and the school’s terrible excuse for fruit punch.
Their finesse from before was gone as they hesitated there. Caitlyn tried to move in a few times, but stopped herself to change the angle or position of her lips. It was excruciatingly cute, but Vi just really, really wanted to kiss her, so she brought her other hand up to Caitlyn’s cheek and used her thumbs to tilt her face back the slightest bit.
Caitlyn’s arm wrapped around Vi’s shoulders as they finally let their lips touch.
They pressed together delicately, and Vi could’ve melted from the feeling of Caitlyn’s soft lips. It was short, but perfect as far as first kisses went. Vi pulled away to let them revel in their new progression, but Caitlyn just exhaled and kissed her again immediately.
She was more forceful this time, more confident. Vi could feel the pressure of their lips together as they readjusted. Her right hand slid down from Caitlyn’s cheek to press into her shoulder. Even with just this lip to lip action, Vi could feel Caitlyn’s hunger. After so long of holding herself back, Vi let it all go.
Pushing forward, Vi matched Caitlyn’s intensity with deeper kisses. Caitlyn inhaled forcefully through her nose, unable to keep her breathing steady. Vi needed Caitlyn closer to her. She wanted to fuse their bodies together so that every inch of skin was touching. If they weren’t in the school parking lot, she would’ve climbed over the console right then and there. Instead she moved her hand from Caitlyn’s shoulder to hold her back and pull her closer.
Months of longing culminated in their embrace. Vi tried to imbue every motion with her adoration for Caitlyn. She stroked her thumb across Caitlyn’s shoulder blade as if every back and forth was another confession. Caitlyn responded by hugging Vi tighter, sighing against her lips.
Now more content with the closeness, their kisses became slower and more tender. Caitlyn’s hand drifted from Vi’s cheek to the nape of her neck and her fingers were electric against Vi’s scalp as she tangled her fingers in her hair. She tasted like ambrosia. Every inch of their skin that touched felt like heaven.
Just as Vi was about to slow them down to a stop, she felt Caitlyn smile against her lips and then forcefully tug on her hair. She gasped and mumbled, “what the fuck,” in between kisses, amused more than anything by Caitlyn’s callback to their worst kissing stories.
In retaliation, Vi waited until Caitlyn had settled back into normal kissing, then snuck her hand into her hair and tugged back. Except this time, she wasn’t going for unpleasant. Caitlyn let her know she hit the mark with a quiet groan. Vi hummed in victory, keeping her hand in Caitlyn’s hair.
After an eternity—seriously, Vi had no idea how long it had been—gentle kisses became shallower with time for breaths in between. Somewhere between when they started and finished, the song had faded into more music of the same style, auto generated like Vi’s phone was egging them on. Every time Vi thought they would finally separate, Caitlyn came back in for another peck, until they were smiling too wide to kiss anymore. Pulling away felt like leaving a fireplace to go shovel snow off the driveway.
But then it didn’t, because then she could see Caitlyn’s eyes again, crinkled in the corners. Her chest rose with every heavy breath. She could feel their closeness, hands woven around bodies and fingers caressing.
“That lip color looks good on you,” Caitlyn said, trying to regain a semblance of composure. Vi let go of Caitlyn’s face and let her other hand slide down her arm to hold her hand. She turned towards her sun visor and flipped the mirror open to look at her lips.
Indeed, Caitlyn’s dark berry lip gloss had transferred over to her lips. It would’ve looked intentional if it weren’t for the messy application and smudges on the skin outside of her lips. She grinned in the mirror and looked back to Caitlyn, whose own lips had the smudged gloss on them. She had the most adoring smirk plastered on a euphoric face.
“You’re incredible, you know that,” Vi asked. She squeezed Caitlyn’s hand in her own as she started to laugh.
“Now that I think about it, I do feel like I’m missing out on the slow dance. Come on,” Caitlyn said as she suddenly opened her car door and hurried around to Vi’s side. Confused, Vi opened her door and let Caitlyn lead her by the hand to the sidewalk in front of the car.
She placed Vi’s hands around her own waist and rested her hands over Vi’s shoulders. The music from inside the car was barely audible compared to the bass heavy music from the gym (definitely not a slow song) and the sounds of night around them. Caitlyn started to sway along to nothing in particular, pulling them closer together so they were more hugging than dancing.
Vi rested her chin on Caitlyn’s shoulder, taking in her smell and the view of the parking lot. After everything that happened, Vi couldn’t help but latch onto every sliver of imperfection. Their messed up hair and clothes, the gloss on their mouths, the music situation, and every other little detail were proof that they turned a shitty night into a great one. And irreversibly changed the dynamic of their relationship by making out, hopefully for the better.
“We’re never gonna be able to get this glitter off,” Vi said affectionately. She hadn’t seen the total damage, but the front of her shirt was already covered.
Caitlyn leaned her cheek to touch the side of Vi’s head. Her arms wrapped loosely on her shoulders, hands lazily exploring her upper back. “I would apologize, but I like that I’ve made a mark on you.”
“Oh, you can make a mark on me anytime, Cupcake.”
“That’s not what I– nevermind,” she said, resting her brow on Vi's shoulder in defeat.
Vi took a moment to memorize the scene. The atmosphere of late fall, Caitlyn’s warm body pressed to hers, the light swaying. She wanted to remember it in 4K resolution. It was weirdly deep, but the realness of the moment brought her into perspective. She felt like a teenager. She felt content.
“Thank you,” Caitlyn whispered into Vi’s ear. “For tonight.”
Vi brought her hands up to hold Caitlyn’s back. “We should do this again sometime.”