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The Littlest Mage

Summary:

Chaos reigns in the Odinson-Stark home when Tony and Loki decide to go out on a double date with friends. Accidents of a magical variety are bound to happen in their family but no one expected this outcome or this culprit. They will just have to remember that sometimes the best things in life are unexpected surprises.

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Life for the Avengers never ceased to be hectic. When they weren’t defending the city from maniacal villains they were doing publicity events at the behest of SHIELD and the government. Staying on the public’s good side was a necessary, if not annoying, evil. The citizens of the world had incredibly short memories and were even more ungrateful. Almost like clockwork a few days after a major battle, the rumbles of discontent would reach the ears of the Avengers. Pundits on 24-hour news channels questioned whether superheroes caused more harm than good.  It was enough to drive anyone mad. The Avengers, the Fantastic Four, Spiderman, and the X-Men all put their lives on the line to ensure the safety of others. Members of the superhero community were beginning to wonder if it wouldn’t be better to leave the ungrateful bastards to their own devices. Despite their annoyance when the alarms sounded they all rushed out to do their jobs once more, no matter what it might interrupt or cost.

For the last two weeks, Steve and Tony tried to coordinate a time where they could meet for drinks. He very much wanted to catch up with his friend. Despite seeing each other on a regular basis, Steve now felt as if he scarcely knew Tony at all. He had been living a double life for well over two years at this point. The trouble was that neither man had very much time to spare as their schedules tightened even further as Christmas rapidly approached. However, Steve received a rather unexpected dinner invitation from Tony just last night. He and Bucky were invited to dinner at the tower. The eccentric billionaire warned Steve that Loki would be there as well. Apparently, it was their date night and Loki thought it would be fun to make it a double date. Steve was still trying it get used to the idea of Tony being engaged to Loki. It would seem that spending more time with the former villain would be the best way to do that. It certainly helped the other Avengers relax around Bucky to some degree.

Unfortunately, that morning Amora and Skurge decided to wreak havoc in the city.  Three very large dragons flew overhead breathing fire down on screaming civilians while the duo robbed two banks and a diamond exchange. The Avengers and the Fantastic Four teamed up to put a stop to the attack. They split up in two teams to evacuate the civilians and to fight the dragons. In a moment of desperation, they called in Spiderman to try to stop Amora and Skurge. The dragons seemed to like Johnny Storm but he couldn’t convince them to land. They only followed him around the city—giving chase. After two hours of trying to bring the dragons down Director Fury dispatched two fighter jets to shoot them down. All things being equal he would have liked to capture the fire-breathing beasts but they were causing too much panic and the fight needed to end. However, it was Loki who once again saved the day. The Asgardian dropped out of the sky and turned the dragons into eggs. Thor promised to transport the eggs back to Muspelheim where they belonged and far away from SHIELD and Fury. Spiderman apprehended Skurge but Amora managed to get away.

Now Steve was sitting in Director Fury’s office in SHIELD HQ. He was in the second hour of his personal debriefing and all signs of pleasantness were gone from his boyish face. He looked at his watch for what seemed like the hundredth time.

Nick stopped talking and glared at the star-spangled hero. “Am I keeping you from something, Rogers?”

Steve squared his shoulders and replied, “As a matter of fact you are, Director. I have dinner plans this evening and I need to go home to get ready for them. We have already been over the details of what happened today twice and that does not include the debriefing I endured with the entire group. I don’t know what more I can tell you. I don’t know why Loki showed up when she did. All that I know is that she stopped the dragons from doing any more damage without killing the creatures. They weren’t malicious…they seemed scared. Why wouldn’t they be? Amora transported them from their home and unleashed them on an environment they didn’t know or understand. They didn’t start setting things on fire until we entered the fray and began chasing them.”

He ground out, “I want to know if Stark is passing information to his freaky little fiancée. He/she, whatever the horned bastard is going by now, has shown up twice during battles involving the Avengers. I would like to know why. I also want some assurances that Loki didn’t keep the dragons for himself so that he can build an army.”

Fury was extremely uncomfortable with Tony and Loki’s relationship. Stark was a major asset for SHIELD and they couldn’t risk him being compromised.  He had only grown more concerned after Agent Romanov reported the details from the meal she shared with Stark’s ‘family’. However, the one bit of good news was that he had identified their only weakness: the children. Tony had turned Stark Manor into a veritable fortress but there was only so much that could be done to protect them outside of those gates. Fury was compiling every scrap of information he could on their children. He already had impressive dossiers on Peter Parker and Darcy Lewis. However, he now knew that Sleipnir was an instructor at the Xavier Institute for Higher Learning. Jormungand, Harley, and Krissy all attended the school. Hela worked for Loki’s company Maison de Labeau.

Steve’s jaw clenched. “First, when Loki appears as a woman it would be respectful if you used the proper pronouns. Perhaps you should avail yourself of the sensitivity training courses SHIELD so graciously provides on gender identity and sexual orientation. Second, Loki intervened with Doom because Tony was going to die. JARVIS contacted her for assistance because he could not find a way to stop the suit’s rapid descent. She intervened today because the news reported that fighter jets had taken off from the base. Apparently, despite their impressive size, those dragons were children and Loki is very protective of children. Last, Thor took possession of those eggs and transported them to Muspelheim. He told you as much during the debriefing with the Avengers. Now I am done with this for the evening. I will not allow you to make me late. I don’t have any more information to give. Good night, Director.”

Fury leaned back in his chair and scowled at Steve. “So you just trust that motherfucker now? Do you not remember all of the death and destruction that Loki brought to this world? Thor promised that his father would punish Loki but instead he just fucking let him go with a slap on the wrist! Please tell me that you aren’t swayed by a pretty face and a nice ass.”

Steve said, “I don’t trust Loki but I don’t think she is the same person that led the invasion. Loki helped us defeat the Skrulls and hasn’t committed any crimes beyond the occasional prank. She will never be clean of the innocent lives lost here but then again none of us will ever be clean of the innocent blood we have spilled.” He opened the door and then stopped, “There is no reason to speak so crudely about her and I’d be careful doing that around Thor or Tony.”

He left the director’s office and walked to elevators. Steve wondered how long Tony would allow SHIELD to maintain their HQ in the base of his tower if Fury continued his campaign against Loki. The inventor had made his position very clear. He and Loki were a package deal and he had no qualms about walking away.  

He walked into the elevator when the doors opened and looked down at his watch. He had just enough time to get dressed for dinner. He hoped that Bucky was already dressed and ready to go. Steve felt a bit nervous for a multitude of reasons. He really wanted Tony to feel as if the team accepted his relationship with Loki. He would have a hard enough slog with the public. He should at least have the support of his friends. Steve was also nervous because he had never been on a double date with Bucky before.

The Avengers all knew about his relationship with Bucky but they mostly steered clear of the couple. It was partly out of respect for Steve’s privacy and it was also because they were concerned about Bucky’s potential for a relapse. Dinner with Tony and Loki would be an interesting experiment to say the very least.

Steve smiled brightly when he walked into his apartment and found Bucky already dressed in a blue, slightly iridescent, suit. He was speechless for a moment because it was the closest he had seen the man look to the old Bucky Barnes since he found him again. His hair was still longer than Steve remembered but he had obviously gotten a trim and a shave this afternoon.

The suit wasn’t something Bucky would normally wear but he understood how important this was to Steve. They never went on actual dates in public because he worried about how people would take the news that Captain America was gay. He was willing to do whatever necessary to make this easier for him. However, he ditched the tie because he just couldn’t bring himself to wear something that felt so much like a noose.

The shaggy haired brunette man flashed a half-smile at Steve. He said, “Tasha helped me pick it out. I didn’t tell her what it was for but she has her ways of finding things out. I am still not convinced that she doesn’t have most of the tower wired for sound.”

Steve crossed the room quickly without even realizing at it first. “I’ve often thought the same thing. You look…”

Bucky laughed and said, “Go get dressed or we are going to be late. I know how much you like to be punctual.”

He nodded and trailed a hand down the black button up shirt Bucky was wearing beneath the suit jacket. He cleared his throat and said, “You are right. We don’t have much time. I’ll enjoy all of this later.”

Steve disappeared into their bedroom and made quick work of changing into a charcoal suit with a blue dress shirt and tie that matched his eyes. He brushed his hair into place and then went into the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of wine from the refrigerator. He intended to buy a better vintage this afternoon but Amora and Skurge had ruined all of his plans. It was really just a gesture anyway. Tony had an impressive wine collection and probably would not drink the bottle Steve brought him.

He joined Bucky in the living room and smiled. “We should head up to Tony’s penthouse. Loki doesn’t seem the type to start anything late.” Steve pressed the button for the elevator and climbed on with James the moment the doors opened.

Bucky had to admit that he was looking forward to seeing Loki. He enjoyed working with the Asgardian during the Skrull invasion and on occasion, they got coffee together. They weren’t exactly friends but rather understood each other perhaps just a bit better than others did. Tony’s experience in Afghanistan made him kind. However, Loki and Bucky’s experiences hardened them.

When the elevator doors opened again, they were at Tony’s now rarely used penthouse. The table in the middle of the room was set for four. AC/DC’s Highway to Hell blared loudly in the background.

Steve muttered, “I will never get used to what is considered music now.” He walked into the penthouse and looked for Tony. He stopped in his tracks and had to laugh at the sight in the kitchen.

Tony and Loki were both dancing and singing to the song. The inventor was dressed in a tailored slate gray suit. Loki was dressed in a green and silver silk halter dress. Despite being pregnant, she was wearing a pair of sky-high silver stilettos.

Tony looked up and laughed when he saw Steve and James watching them. He said, “JARVIS turn off the music and next time you could warn us that we have guests.”

The music ended and JARVIS replied, “You were expecting Captain Rogers and Sergeant Buchanan. I didn’t see the need to warn you of their impending arrival. I am sorry, sir.”

Loki laughed fondly. “You are a cheeky thing. I think Hela is influencing you with her love of mischief.”

“I can neither confirm nor deny that accusation, Madam.”

Tony shook his head and then walked over to Steve and Bucky. “Hey. Thanks for coming. I thought you were going to be late when I heard Fury pulled Steve back in for a separate debriefing.”

Loki smiled slyly. “I assume the thorough inquisition has to do with my appearance today. I do apologize for the inconvenience, Captain Rogers. I just couldn’t let SHIELD kill those dragons. They were merely babes.”

“It was no trouble. I am used to his bluster and I am grateful that you rescued the dragons. Creatures that wonderful shouldn’t be killed. As for Director Fury, he is just taking awhile to come around. This relationship comes as something of a shock to all of us.”

Tony laughed and asked, “Really? I love all things that are delicious, dangerous, and possibly bad for my health. Loki really seems like an obvious choice.”

Loki smirked at Tony and then turned her attention to Bucky. “Good evening, James. It has been awhile.”

Bucky stepped forward and kissed Loki’s cheek. “It has been too long. Although, I suppose you can’t really drink coffee now.”

She laughed. “I still drink coffee on occasion much to Tony’s annoyance. However, I also enjoy ice cream and there is a lovely place close to the Stark Manor. We should try to get together after the holidays.

Tony looked at the bottle of wine Steve was carrying and smiled. “You shouldn’t have, Cap, but it is appreciated. Dinner is ready. Why don’t the two of you have a seat?”

Steve smiled and handed the inventor the bottle. He said, “Well, I just wanted to thank you for inviting us to dinner, Tony. I appreciate the gesture. I feel as if I have missed a lot of your life lately. I would also like to get to know Loki better.”

“I look forward to getting to know you better as well, Captain.” Loki walked into the kitchen.

Bucky and Steve walked over to the table and sat down. They both jumped a little when several serving dishes appeared on the table.

Tony chuckled as he uncorked the bottle of wine. “I probably should have warned you but seeing your faces was worth it.” He poured three glasses of wine and said, “I hope Indian is okay.”

Bucky’s face lit up. “I love it.”

Loki walked over to the table with a pitcher of mango lassi and said, “I remembered you mentioning it once. I happen to be a great fan of Indian cuisine as well. Please don’t be shy in taking as much as you like.”

Bucky’s hand shot out first and he started ladling chicken vindaloo onto his plate. He grabbed a couple pieces of naan as well.

Tony smirked and playfully said, “You are going to start making me jealous, Cupcake.”

Loki laughed as she sat down and said, “You may rest at ease, Stark. I do believe I am not James’ type whether I am male or female. He has a fondness for blondes.”

Bucky lips turned up into a half-smile and looked over at Steve with unguarded fondness. He shrugged. “I don’t know if it is all blondes or just this one.”

Steve’s cheeks flushed pink and he tried to think of a way to change the subject. He asked, “Who is looking after the children tonight?”

Tony smirked at Steve but mercifully allowed the change of subject. He said, “Well, Fulla and JARVIS are always on duty but Sleipnir, Hela, and Darcy are at home as well. They try to pitch in on date nights to keep the kids occupied. Jormungand and Harley could care less if we leave but Krissy and Fenrir get a bit clingy. I didn’t know if we were going to make it out of the house tonight. They both threw a fit.”

“Hope they are okay,” Steve said, he looked genuinely concerned.

Loki’s expression tensed a bit as she remembered the scene as they tried to leave. “We have a routine at night and they become a bit agitated when it is interrupted. I am sure they both calmed down once we were out of the house. Darcy is good at distracting them.”

Steve steered clear of the obviously spicy chicken vindaloo and instead opted for chicken korma. He ladled some of it onto his plate and said, “I didn’t know all of your children lived at home.”

Tony tore a piece of naan and stuffed it into his mouth. He said, “I wouldn’t say that they all live at home but they all certainly have their own spaces in the house. Peter lives here in the city with Mary Jane most of the time but occasionally they both come home to stay. Hela splits her time pretty evenly between our house and the hole in the wall Wade calls home. Sleipnir and Wanda live in the guesthouse on the property full-time. Darcy and Johnny both live in the house with us full-time. However, since my relationship with Loki is about to become very public they will all be moving back home until further notice. We won’t let them become targets if the reaction isn’t exactly favorable.”

Steve frowned deeply at the idea that people would try to exact revenge through Loki and Tony’s children but he knew how little honor was left in the world. Honestly, there wasn’t very much honor in his day either.

Bucky said, “That sounds like a lot of people in one house.”

He couldn’t imagine being around so many people. Bucky needed space and often took off without warning for days at a time. The feeling of being confined was too much for him to bear even if it was just being confined in a swanky penthouse with his partner. Bucky knew it made Steve worry about him but the man understood his need to roam.

Tony chuckled. “It is a fairly large house and I don’t mind it. It feels like family. I can’t say that I have ever had that before because I was an only child but it is nice.”

Loki said, “And I grew up in a palace where people were always coming and going. The higher ranking members of the court lived in the palace with us along with the servants. I am used to the hustle and bustle of a large household.” She took a sip of the mango lassi and asked, “How goes the job search, James?”

He shook his head. “I’m not exactly the most employable person on Earth. SHIELD has come knocking a few times but I am not interested in getting back into the killing business. I’ll feel like I am in the same situation but with different masters.”

Steve bristled but tried to hide it. He thought he had thwarted Fury’s attempts to recruit Bucky. He was fairly certain that he had made himself very clear to the director. It would seem that another conversation was in order.

As if reading his mind, Bucky said, “I can handle turning down the director on my own. His one-eyed scowl doesn’t really do much in the way of intimidation for me. I always think about plucking the other one out and it makes me smile.”

Loki laughed genuinely because she often thought of the same thing. Fury reminded her too much of Odin but at least the All-Father had the good sense to know when he was outmatched.

Tony smirked. “Maybe Lokes can hire you as security or something. She has a fashion show coming up in January and you would get the opportunity to ogle all of the insanely beautiful half-dressed models. Trust me…Loki only hires the most stunning models.”

Steve gave Tony a disapproving glare. He didn’t understand how the younger man could be so flippant about being a cad with his partner sitting right beside him. In that way, he was very much Howard Stark’s son. The elder Stark never met a woman he didn’t want to have relations with.

Tony laughed and asked, “What? I like to look but I don’t touch. Loki likes to look, too.”

Even Bucky had to chuckle quietly at Steve’s look of surprise. He had caught his coffee companion checking out attractive men and women on several occasions.

Loki shrugged her shoulders and said, “I’ve never let a silly little thing like gender constrain me. Much to Thor’s chagrin I bedded his male and female friends in nearly equal parts.”

Tony snorted. “Whore.”

Loki smiled deviously, “Pot, meet kettle.”

He chuckled and kissed Loki’s cheek. “Touché. However, in fairness you’ve been at this thing a lot longer than I have. We might need to break out an abacus to tally all of your sexual conquests.”

Steve blushed furiously. “Tony…”

Loki smiled and said, “There is no need to admonish Tony. He is quite right about my promiscuity. I was very much like your Captain Kirk. I have bedded persons in almost all Nine Realms. It is a great deal of fun really—especially the elves.”

Tony nodded. “You are looking at Asgard’s very first teen mother!”

“I wouldn’t say that I was the first but I am definitely the most well-known. The All-Father was so very disappointed,” Loki laughed lightly.

The inventor chuckled and said, “Let’s change the subject before Steve’s face gets stuck that delightful shade of red. Steve you said that you wanted to know more about my life. What would you like to know?”

The star spangled hero looked a bit out of sorts because of the question. There were too many possible answers. He asked, “When did you decide to adopt Harley and Krissy?”

Tony couldn’t say that he was surprised by Steve’s question. It just wasn’t a story he liked to tell. However, in the interest of transparency he was willing to tell it to Steve. The man was putting forth the effort and Tony wouldn’t discount that.

He put his fork down and said, “Well, I can’t say that it was anything I had planned. I met Harley during a difficult time in my life and the little guy was actually a lot of help. More help than anyone else had been. He was in a bad situation at home but I tried to help as much as I could from afar. I paid his mother’s bills and sent him tech but then one day she left and didn’t come back. He called me after two weeks of trying to take care of Krissy on his own. I flew there immediately to see what I could do for them. The rest is history really.”

Loki discreetly squeezed Tony’s hand in support. She knew how angry he was about the state he found those kids in when he arrived. It was a rare and special thing to see Tony truly lose his temper. Loki was just glad she was in Milan at the time. She didn’t know what she would have done if she saw those kids in such a sorry state. She had far less control than Tony did in these situations.

“It is a great thing that you did, Tony. There are so many children that aren’t lucky enough to find a family to adopt them. That’s especially true for a child of Harley’s age. They seem very happy with your family.”

Steve was of course talking from personal experience. He was more than a little loss after the death of his mother.

Tony nodded and said, “They are happy with us.”

Steve felt terrible that he had obviously dredged up bad memories for both of them.  He said, “Loki you mentioned that royalty from Jotunheim will attend your wedding. Do you have family there still?”

“Ah, yes. My brothers Helblindi and Byleistr will attend the wedding with their families. We have not been in contact very long but we have formed a sort of bond. It turns out they hated Laufey a great deal as did many on Jotunheim. No one had been able to wrest control of the realm out of his psychotic hands. Helblindi now sits on the throne of Jotunheim and Byleistr acts as his ambassador with the other realms. He will meet with your world’s Security Council while he is here.”

Loki’s phone began to ring. She looked at it and said, “I am sorry. I must take this.”

Tony’s eyebrows rose at that. Loki rarely took calls during date night.

She said, “It’s Hela. I will be back shortly.” Loki left the table to answer the phone.

Tony frowned. “JARVIS, is everything okay at home?”

“Yes, sir. However, I believe it would be best if you and Madam came home soon.”

Something about JARVIS’s voice made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. “Okay…”

Loki walked back into the room looking alarmed. “I am sorry but we are going to have to leave early. Hela said that she thought it was best that we come home. She promises that everyone is in good health but she refused to give me any more detail over the phone.”

Tony shot out of his seat and said, “I just got the same vague answer from JARVIS.” He looked at Steve and Bucky. “I’m sorry guys but we’ve got to cut and run. Stay and enjoy dinner. It would be a waste if you didn’t. Don’t worry about cleaning anything up.”

Steve stood as well. “Are you sure everything is okay? Do you need my help?’

“No, I don’t think so. Hela and JARVIS would be honest if anyone was in danger. It might be that Krissy and Fenrir are upset and won’t settle for them. I’m sure it is nothing serious but we should go home now all the same.”

Loki was already putting on her jacket and grabbing her clutch.

Tony picked up his car keys and said, “I’m sorry. We’ll do this again sometime soon.”

Steve said, “Don’t worry about it. Go check on your family, Tony. Let me know later on if everything is okay.”

Tony nodded. “Sure thing, Cap.”

Loki and Tony took the elevator down to the parking garage and climbed into their car. “I should just teleport us home. Driving will take too long.”

He started the car and said, “You used way too much magic earlier today when you teleported in from Miami to take care of the dragon problem. You said yourself that magic tires you out more when you are pregnant. There is no need to risk dong something that will use so much energy.”

Loki huffed but relented because Tony was right. She had meetings all over the globe and she teleported to them to save time. Loki wanted all business completed before Christmas so that they could enjoy it as a family. Life was going to get very complicated after the holidays.

The inventor sped out of the garage and tore through the city to get home sooner. He still didn’t feel right about the way JARVIS’s sounded. Tony didn’t think he had lied to him but his AI was being evasive as hell and that was never good. The more time JARVIS spent interacting with the family the more his personality developed outside of the lines of code Tony provided. JARVIS had long since passed the Turing test—he was already sentient. What had been happening to him the last few years was something very different.

The drive to Stark Manor was silent as they both worried about what might have happened. Tony stopped at the gatehouse in front of the Manor when they arrived.

JARVIS’s voice intoned, “Good evening and welcome home, sir. Please enter your five-digit access code.”

Tony quickly entered his code and asked, “Is everyone okay, JARVIS?”

“Yes, sir. There was a mishap with magic but everyone is safe and accounted for in the house. Master Sleipnir is waiting for the two of you at the main house. Sir, please place your right hand on the biometric scanner.”

A panel shifted to the right and revealed the biometric scanner. Even Tony was subjected to intense security measures to pass through the gates. He had too many clever enemies for anything to be taken for granted. He trusted JARVIS to keep his family safe and this was just one of the measures.

The inventor placed his hand on the biometric scanner.

Loki said, “I don’t understand why Hela didn’t just explain what was going on over the phone. It’s not like her to be so obtuse.”

“Unless she’s up to something,” Tony replied.

JARVIS said, “Thank you for your cooperation, sir.”

Loki shook her head. “I don’t think this is a trick. She wouldn’t interrupt our date night unless it was important. Besides, I heard worry in her voice. Something has gone wrong. I can feel it.”

Tony revved the engine and stepped on the gas as soon as the gates opened completely. He quickly drove up to the main house and parked in front of the walkway. He turned off the car and took a deep breath. Tony tried to make his home as safe as humanly possible for their children but he knew nothing was foolproof and accidents happened.

Sleipnir was standing outside on his cell phone when Tony and Loki pulled up in front of the house. He quickly ended the call and shoved the phone into his pocket. Sleipnir walked out to the car and opened Loki’s door. “I’m sorry for interrupting your date night, Mom.”

Loki climbed out of Tony’s impossibly low to the ground Lamborghini and asked, “What happened, Sleipnir? Hela wouldn’t go into detail over the phone but she wouldn’t call if it wasn’t important. Your sister is stubbornly independent that way. All JARVIS told us was that there had been a mishap with magic but Jormungand and Harley know better. They wouldn’t practice without my being present.”

The God of Mischief and Chaos started teaching Krissy and Harley magic after they eagerly watched Jormungand practicing one day. It wasn’t that mortals were incapable of magic it was that the knowledge of how to tap into it died out centuries ago. Some mortals like Doom and Doctor Strange harnessed the ability in some small fashion. However, their capabilities were laughable compared to how Harley and Krissy would develop under Loki’s skilled tutelage. They would surely become skilled mages in their own right, as they grew older. The downside to teaching the children magic on Earth was that there were fewer protections in place. Asgard was a hearty realm steeped in magic. It could take a few realm-altering accidents caused by inexperienced mages.

Tony walked around the car and rested a hand on Loki’s back to calm her down. They had been tense the entire ride home but he wasn’t as worried anymore. JARVIS assured him that everyone was still alive and that nothing was broken beyond repair. It was practically a miracle where their brood was concerned. Having eight children ripping and running through the house at various time led to interesting accidents. Hell, their adult children were more likely to destroy something because they were stronger and more powerful.

Sleipnir shook his head. “I think it would be better if I show you and Step-Tony what happened because I honestly don’t have the words to explain. I definitely don’t understand how it happened. I was in the guesthouse when Hela freaked out. I could hear her scream for me all the way out there.”

Tony cleared his throat and said, “Maybe you should just take us inside to see what happened. You are only making your mother more upset and scared.”

Sleipnir nodded and headed into the house. He led the way to the game room on the first floor where some of his siblings were waiting. Jormungand and Harley were off playing video games. Peter was missing because he was patrolling the city as Spiderman. However, he would soon join the fray because Sleipnir called him home.

Loki huffed. “I am not scared. I just want to know what happened. We shouldn’t have left the children on their own tonight. Fenrir cried as we tried to leave and Krissy locked herself in her room. It was a sign that we should have stayed home with them. Something was off and I felt it but I ignored those feelings because of my morbid curiosity about Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes. They make such a charming couple.”

The inventor only nodded in agreement. He knew better than to argue with Loki when she was emotional. She got a bit irrational about the children even when she wasn’t hormonal and five months pregnant with his half mortal/half Jötunn spawn. Loki was a fierce mother or father depending on the form she took on a particular day.

Sleipnir opened the doors leading into the game room and stepped out of the way. He still struggled to wrap his mind around how this even happened. He learned magic on Asgard with a teenage Loki as his teacher and even he had not caused such mischief. Perhaps it was because Heimdall’s watchful eye was always on him as a youngling. Loki had been a powerful babe and Odin worried that his grandchildren would possess the same power. He put as many safeguards as possible in place to protect them and Asgard.

Hela and Darcy were sitting on one of the sectional couches with Krissy sandwiched in between them. The little girl looked perfectly fine as she watched some animated show on a StarkPad. She was dressed in a pair of yellow and blue footy pajamas.

Hela looked on with some interest. Her normally stark white hair was now an impressive shade of electric blue. It appeared that she spent her evening dying her hair. Hela was ever the chameleon. She often changed her hair and eye color using mortal products and on rare occasions magic. However, she was not a shapeshifter like her brothers and Loki. The only form she could shift into was that of a Jötunn.

Darcy on the other hand was actively biting her fingernails. The nail biting was a nervous habit from her childhood that she had yet to break. She felt a bit guilty for what happened. Darcy told Fulla to take the evening off because she would look after the kids and then she promptly called Johnny because—young love. He was excited to tell her all about the dragons he flew around with that morning.

Loki walked over and picked up Fenrir who had been quietly playing with his blocks in the middle of the floor. He was dressed in the Spiderman pajamas Peter bought him for his birthday. She hugged him to her and sat down on the couch.

Tony sat down next to Loki and said, “Well, out with it. What happened here tonight?”

Hela said, “I washing my hair when I heard Darcy scream. I ran into Krissy’s bedroom and found a strange man there. I couldn’t understand how he had gotten past JARVIS or Fulla for that matter. I was about to…handle the situation when Darcy stopped me. She said that he was JARVIS—our JARVIS. I thought she had lost her mind for a moment.” She belatedly added, “Sorry.”

Darcy shrugged her shoulders and said, “To be fair I thought I had gone crazy for a moment, too. I won’t hold it against you. It’s definitely the strangest thing that has happened around here and that is with Sleipnir shapeshifting into a talking horse for kicks and Peter covering the entire house in his webs that one time.”

Tony blinked at his daughters and then started to laugh. “If this wasn’t the best prank I’ve had pulled on me in years I would be pissed that you interrupted a perfectly good dinner. This was spectacular. You have both done me proud. The way you got Sleipnir to pretend to be so disturbed was magical.”

A young man in his early twenties walked into the room. He had chocolate brown hair and honey colored eyes. He cleared his throat and said, “Uh, sir. This is not a prank. I am afraid to inform you that I am the magical mishap.”

Loki’s eyes went wide and she looked at Hela. “Was this Jormungand or Harley? They know better than to practice magic without me. It’s the only rule…because things like this can happen.”

Tony was too dumbfounded for words because slowly he realized it was like looking at a younger version of himself. He slowly stood up and approached the young man whose voice sounded very much like a younger JARVIS—if his AI was capable of aging in the traditionally human way.

Hela cleared her throat and said, “It was neither of the boys. They were playing video games with Sleipnir in the guesthouse. Fulla, Darcy, Krissy, Fenrir, and I were the only ones in the main house tonight.”

Loki’s gaze shifted to Krissy and she uttered a soft, “Oh.”

Tony meanwhile stopped in front of the younger man and stared. He resisted the urge to poke him because that would be rude and weird under the circumstances. Tony still wasn’t convinced that this wasn’t some elaborate prank. Could anyone really blame him? He lived in a house with the God of Mischief and their magic wielding/partially superhuman children. He asked, “JARVIS, buddy, is that really you in there?”

“Yes, sir. I am afraid that it is me.”

Tony shook his head in disbelief. Part of the inventor accepted this was happening but the poof-based part of his personality needed something more than his own gut instinct. “Tell me something only JARVIS would know about me.”

The younger man leaned in and whispered, “You keep ten original Nancy Drew books in your workshop because they belonged to your mother when she was a little girl. The pages are littered with the artwork she drew as a child. The late Mrs. Stark gave them to you on the occasion of your fifth birthday because…”

Tony waved him off and said, “Okay. It’s you.” He took a breath and ran a hand through his messy hair. He stopped mid-rake as a cold wave of terror washed over him. “If you are here then who is protecting everything. Your voice greeted us at the gate.”

JARVIS’s voice over head said, “I exist simultaneously at the moment, sir. I am at once inhabiting your systems and the body before you.”

The inventor turned and looked at his fiancé. “Explain, and none of your hand waving mumbo-jumbo about the vibrations of the universe.”

Loki scowled at Tony for his derisive description of magic. However, since the calamity was at least 30% her fault she decided to be benevolent. Loki said, “Krissy is responsible for doing this but she’s so young I’m not sure she even understands how it occurred.”

Tony looked at the young man and asked, “What happened from your point of view, Jarvis?”

The young man began to speak, “Miss Krissy and young Master Fenrir were in her bedroom playing before bedtime. I was making the helicopter fly around the room to amuse them as I often do. However, Miss Krissy was crestfallen because you and Madam were gone for the evening. Yong Masters Jormungand and Harley wanted to play video games with Master Sleipnir and she is too young to play their games. Miss Hela was dying her hair and Miss Darcy was on the phone. Krissy became bored and I tried to amuse her but it was not enough. She wanted to know why I could not come out of the computers to play with her and Fenrir. I explained that I did not have a body and could not as much as I might want to do so. She asked why I did not have a body and I told her it was because I am not a human. I tried to explain humanity to her in way she could grasp but…the next thing I knew I was standing in this body.”

Darcy muttered and said, “Gratefully wearing that assemble or this would have been even more uncomfortably weird. And Krissy would have gotten a very early lesson in the difference between boys and girls.”

Krissy looked up from her cartoons at that moment and frowned. “Am I in trouble?”

Tony took a breath and shook his head. He scooped her up into his arms. “No—of course not, jelly bean. You just wanted Jarvis to be able to play with you.”

She shook her head. “Not uh.”

“Why did you do it then?” he asked.

Krissy grinned and said, “I wanted another brother to play with and the baby in Mummy’s tummy is taking too long. I wanted Jarvis to be littler like me but he’s a big person like Petey and Nirry.”

Tony blinked at his daughter in shock. “You wanted Jarvis to be your brother?”

She nodded and said, “He’s a good brother.” Krissy looked up at Jarvis with wide eyes. “Are you mad at me, Jarvis?”

Jarvis took a step closer and smiled at her. “I could never be upset with you, Miss Krissy.”

Her eyes lit up and she grinned at Jarvis with the brightest smile.

Loki handed Fenrir off to Darcy. She said, “No one is angry with you, but we do have to talk about how you did this. Did you use a spell?

Krissy rested her head on Tony’s shoulder and nodded. She opened her arms for Loki to pick her up.

Loki took Krissy and rubbed her back. She sat down on the couch and Tony joined them. She asked, “What type of spell did you use?”

Krissy quietly replied. “A summoning spell.”

The older mage blinked in shock. “Okay. Listen, it is very late—too late for little girls to be awake. It is time for you to go to bed, Kristina.”

She lifted her head off Loki’s shoulder and asked, “Are you sure that I’m not in trouble? Are you going to send me away?”

Tony and Loki both tensed at her innocent question. The inventor was the first to recover. He rubbed her back. “We talked about this. Remember? We’re your family now and no matter what happens you don’t send away family.”

Krissy said, “My first mommy did.”

Loki said, “Your first mommy was sick. She was too sick to take care of you and Harley. She did the very best that she could to make sure that both of you would be okay. Nevertheless, she loved you very much, Krissy. We love you very much and this family just wouldn’t feel right without Harley and you.”

She nodded a little and put her thumb into her mouth. Krissy always reverted to sucking her thumb when she was upset.

Hela said, “I can put her to bed. I know you need to deal with this situation.”

Loki was reluctant to let go of Krissy. She wanted to convince their little girl that they wouldn’t send her away because of a bit of mischief. Harley had figured it out months ago but then again he got into more mischief than his younger sister did. Until tonight, Krissy had never done anything to warrant Tony or Loki being upset with her. They were pretty laid back parents in most cases.

Loki said, “Your big sister is going to put you to bed. She is going to read you as many books as you want.”

Krissy perked up a little. “Really? Will she read Winnie the Pooh to me?”

Hela laughed and said, “I’ll read the whole book if you want. Come on, munchkin. I will tell you about the time when I summoned a dragon from Muspelheim and set Grandfather’s study on fire by accident.”

Krissy giggled around her thumb.

Darcy said, “I will put Fenrir down and then I will tell you about the time when I put too much detergent in the washing machine and flooded the entire room with water and bubbles.”

Tony scoffed and said, “She was 22 at the time. She didn’t even have the excuse of being a little girl.” He kissed the top of her head and said, “Sweet dreams, munchkin.”

Loki smiled and said, “The sweetest.”

Hela picked Krissy up and said, “Say night-night.”

She waved with one hand and said, “Night-night.”

 “Night-night, Jarvis.”

“Goodnight, Gepetto.”

Hela laughed softly and carried Krissy out of the room. Darcy followed them out with Fenrir in her arms.

Tony ran a hand over his head and groaned. “I need a drink.” He looked at Loki and asked, “What happened?”

“I taught Krissy a summoning spell. It is a little spell that can bring books or toys to her. It will help her find her shoes if she has misplaced them. When she used that spell to summon Jarvis, it all went a bit wrong. Her magic compensated for the fact that Jarvis didn’t have a body so it gave him one. The good news is that she is powerful, Anthony. She will grow to be a very powerful mage. Krissy’s magic realized her intent even if she didn’t and it filled in the blanks.”

Tony looked at Jarvis and asked, “How do you feel? I have been so wrapped up in figuring out what the hell is going on that I didn’t ask about you. This all has to be a little traumatic for you, buddy.”

Jarvis said, “I do not have an experience to compare this to, sir. I scanned myself before you arrived and I am in exceptional health. I do not feel any physical discomfort.”

Tony nodded at him. “Good. Can you turn him back, Lokes?”

Loki looked up at Jarvis and said, “If that is what he wants.”

“Why wouldn’t he…wait!” Tony stood up. “Do you want to go back to the way you were?”

Jarvis looked genuinely perplexed. “I do not know, sir. I exert a great amount of control in this world through your systems and your suits. I have access to more information than most humans could ever hope to process and yet this is different. I do not know if I would want to stay this way permanently but I also do not know if I want to return to my former state right away.”

Tony dropped back down onto the couch. “Well, shit. Krissy turned you into a real boy and now you don’t want to go back. I can’t say that I blame you.”

“Are you disappointed, sir?” Jarvis truly looked distressed by the prospect. His purpose was still to serve Tony’s best interest. If he truly wanted Jarvis to relinquish this new body then he would do so without question.

Silence filled the room but Tony shook his head. “No. You are changing, Jarvis. Even without this body I have watched you grow into something more than I ever imagined when I created you. Some part of me expected you would want this at some point in the future. I’ve been working on theories of how an android body would truly function with your programming. I never mentioned it to you because I didn’t want you to feel as if I was pushing you into it. You are your own person, Jarvis. I think it only right that you get to make your own decisions. Hell, you are the more responsible part out of the two of us.”

Jarvis blinked and then smiled at the fond expression on Tony’s face. “I believe I would like a trial period of sorts, sir. Perhaps I can experiment with this new form just until the holidays are over.”

“I am going to add double protection to all of the systems. We don’t know what effect this will have on your ability to control everything. A human mind is very different.”

JARVIS’s voice replied, “I have been running diagnostic programs since this occurred sir. It does not appear that there are any gasps in security or in my overall functioning. I am connected to the mind in that body but I am myself as well. It would seem that I was copied and left intact.”

Tony said, “Good. I want you to run the diagnostic programs on a loop until further notice. I want any changes, good or bad, sent to my StarkPad immediately.”

 Sleipnir and Peter both walked into the room.

Peter’s mouth flapped open as he stared at Jarvis. “Okay, I totally owe you $50. You weren’t kidding. Jarvis?”

“In the flesh, sir. Literally.” He chuckled at his own pun.

Loki laughed and said, “This is what happens when we leave the children alone.”

Tony cleared his throat and said, “Good news, boys. Jarvis is going to stick around for a while in his new body. Say hello to your new brother. I am going to get a drink now—a large one.”

“Uh, welcome aboard, Jarvis.” Sleipnir said, “I think I will join you, Step-Tony.”

Peter nodded numbly. “Make mine a double, Dad.”

Jarvis smiled, “I believe I will have one as well. I have always wondered what the appeal of alcohol was watching you, sir.”

Tony said, “First, I feel weird with you calling me ‘sir’. Just call me Tony. Second, I don’t know if you are even old enough to drink. You are only an hour or so old. I think I’d be a very bad parent to give you alcohol.”

He flashed a cocky grin that was all Stark and replied, “You created me in 1992, sir. I believe that I exceed the legal age limit to consume alcohol.”

Tony just shook his head. “Whatever but you are getting more water than scotch in your glass.”

Peter laughed hysterically. “No way! We are going to celebrate this properly! It is essentially Jarvis’s birthday. He has got to try it all. I think we should do shots and lots of them!”

Tony groused, “How is this my life? I blame all of this on you, Loki. You and your smoking hot magical body.”

Loki shrugged and said, “It really isn’t the strangest thing I have ever seen. I really must take you all to Alfheim sometime. I have a very lively friend there that is a tree. He’s lovely. He is married to a wood nymph.”

Sleipnir clapped Jarvis on the back gently. “Don’t worry about it. Peter and I are going to get you totally wasted. It is a rite of passage. I’ll even teach you a dirty limerick Uncle Thor taught me the first time he took me out carousing.”

Peter smirked. “Johnny is on his way home and we should get Wade over here. We’ll drink til sunrise.”

Jarvis only laughed and let himself be pulled along with Peter and Sleipnir.

Loki stood and walked over to Tony. “Are you truly okay?’

Tony shook his head as he watch the boys walk down the corridor. “Yeah, I want Jarvis to be happy just like the rest of the kids. If he wants to keep this body then I am okay with that.” Tony got ready to leave the room and then stopped. “What’s with his appearance though? Did Krissy’s magic do that.”

She smiled. “No, I believe that this is what Jarvis imagines himself to look like—a younger you. One of the children indeed.”

The idea that any of their children would want to be remotely like him was something he never considered. He was an alcoholic that saved the world on a good day. He knew that. “Come on. I’ve got to make sure they aren’t breaking into the good stuff. You have to build up to that sort of thing—I can’t let them give Jarvis alcohol poisoning his first time drinking.”

Loki laughed and said, “Go on. I am going to check on Krissy and then I will join you.”

Tony kissed her and then left the room.

She looked toward the camera and asked, “JARVIS, are you okay?”

“Never better, Madam.”

She smiled, “Happy birthday.”

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