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“Janus, will you please come down for family time?” Patton pleaded with the teen.
The foster kid looked up from his phone and said, “I don’t have to come down ‘cause you're not my family.”
Patton held in a sigh and left the room quietly. He went back downstairs feeling very dejected. He had tried everything to get Janus to open up and spend time with them, but nothing was working.
“Well? How’d it go?” Logan asked him.
Patton just sighed.
“That bad huh?”
“He’s like a clam! Almost impossible to open, but once you finally get it, there’s a beautiful pearl inside!” Patton exclaimed.
Logan looked at him sympathetically. He went over and gave his husband a small side hug. “We’ll figure it out Patton. He may just need time.”
“At this rate, he’ll be going to college before he lets us in, Lo,” Patton countered, half joking yet there was a serious undertone to it.
“Patton, my dearest, some people take longer to build trust. We don’t know what his last home was like or what else has happened to him.”
Patton nodded. “Yeah, you’re right-”
Logan threw in a quiet, “Of course I am.”
“-but maybe we should try to show that he can trust us other than just using words.”
Logan tilted his head slightly in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“We’ll start small! Maybe a plate of sugar cookies and a nice note for him! It’ll be like the holidays but in September!” Patton said, instead of answering Logan’s question. Patton grabbed Logan’s arm and dragged him to the kitchen to start on a batch of cookies.
Janus watched from his hidden spot at the top of the stairs and sighed quietly, going back to his room. He fixed the makeup on the left side of his face and put on his combat boots, haphazardly throwing on his leather jacket. He grabbed a hidden box of cigarettes and some stashed cash before climbing out the window and onto the tree that was right outside his room. Once he got closer to the ground he jumped and landed quietly on the grass. Janus made sure to keep low to not be seen by either Patton or Logan. He got out of sight of the window and stood up straight, walking leisurely to his hideout.
Janus reached his hideout, which was just a treehouse hidden away in the trees, within a few minutes and let his shoulders slump into a more relaxed position. He collapsed onto a bean bag and got out a cigarette, lighting it and puffing some smoke into the air. Janus closed his eyes, relaxing into the bean bag. He stayed like that for a few minutes, and then forced his eyes open and stood up, going over to a small drawer. He opened it and pulled out a box labeled “Escape Fund”. Janus opened the box which was full of bills and coins and one piece of paper, which he pulled out and added another $30 to the total that had been there before.
Janus sighed. He still needed quite a bit, but it was progress. He decided he would take a walk and blow off some steam. He wandered around the trees, kicking small rocks across the ground, but not straying too far from his hideout.
He was so angry at everything. It wasn’t fair how he couldn’t trust anyone. It wasn’t fair how he couldn’t show his emotions in fear of the consequences. It wasn’t fair how he couldn’t be himself around anyone in fear of being mocked or punished. It wasn’t fair how he had to make so many facades that their weight was starting to get to him. It wasn’t fair that he couldn’t be a normal kid because adults were stupid and fucked up.
Janus sat down on the ground, leaning against a tree and pulling out the necklace that was hidden under his shirt. He opened the locket and smiled at the picture of him and his big brother. Janus had always looked up to Virgil. He was Janus’ hero. Then they had split them apart and that was the last time he had seen him. That happened almost 10 years ago. That was the last time he looked up to anyone.
Janus stood up with a wistful sigh. He should get “home” before his “parents” call the police or something dramatic. He meandered his way back home, making sure no one saw him or where his hideout was. He climbed back up the tree, crawling in through the window. He froze as he heard a knock at his door.
~ ~ ~
Patton piled the sugar cookies onto a plate and grabbed the note. He went up to Janus’ room where the door was closed. He knocked lightly and spoke, “Janus? Kiddo? I’ve got some cookies here for you if you want them.”
Patton was met with silence. He waited a moment and then deflated slightly as he set the plate on the floor. “Alright. I’ll leave them out here if you change your mind!”
Patton went back downstairs, flopping face first into the couch. Logan quietly started rubbing his back comfortingly.
Janus opened his door a crack and opened it the rest of the way when he was met with an empty hallway. He stooped down and picked up the note and the plate and shut his door. He read the note.
Hey there kiddo! Lo and I made you some cookies! Happy Holidays but September!
- Your happy pappy Patton
Janus rolled his eyes and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen, scribbling down his own note to Patton. He left it with the cookies outside his door and went to his bathroom to remove the makeup on his face.
~ ~ ~
Logan climbed up the stairs to try to talk to Janus. He stopped short in front of the teen’s door. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he picked up Janus’ note and the cookies. He went back downstairs and gave the note to Patton who read it aloud.
“Bribery doesn’t work on me anymore. Good try though. Leave me alone.”
Patton frowned deeply. He looked up at Logan and said, “I think we need to clear some things up with Janus.”
Patton stood up and went up the stairs, knocking sternly, but not harshly, on Janus’ door. “Janus, it’s Patton. We need to talk.”
“Then talk,” Janus responded, sounding nonchalantly, but inwardly was very much panicking. He had already taken off his makeup. If Patton came in, he would see it. All of it.
“That’s not what he meant and you know it,” Janus heard Logan say. “We read your note and we need to discuss it with you.”
Janus was panicking a lot more at the implications of that statement. Still, he kept his voice cool and collected. “If you read it, then why aren’t you leaving me alone?”
Janus heard one of them jiggling the door handle and in the blink of an eye, he was getting shoes on, ready to bolt.
“Janus, please, let us in. We’re worried about you,” Patton pleaded, but Janus didn’t hear it over the key before inserted into the lock.
He didn’t even care about his jacket as he grabbed his phone and started opening the window. The door opened as Janus finally got the window open. He hid the left side of his face as he tried to hurry out the window, but a strong hand grabbed onto his arm and Janus’ brain seemed to shut down, moving solely on instinct.
Janus twisted whoever had grabbed his arm and ran to the bedroom door, knocking items over to block the other person’s path. Somehow in his rush, he managed to grab his jacket. He ran to the front door, throwing it open and running, not bothering to close it behind him as he sprinted down the street.
“Janus!!” Patton called after him, but Janus didn’t stop and Patton followed after him. “Janus, wait!” Patton rounded a corner, where Janus had gone, but he couldn’t see him anywhere. He went a few more steps before realizing that he wouldn’t find Janus. He ran back to his house and looked for Logan who was in the living room.
“Are you ok Lo?” Patton asked.
“I’m fine Patton. He just twisted my arm a little. I’m not hurt.” Logan paused as he noticed the lack of the teenager. “Where is he?”
Patton took a deep breath, preparing to say it all in one breath, “He ran down the street and turned the corner and when I turned, he wasn’t there and so I came back here to check on you and I think we should call the police.”
Logan nodded and dialed 911.
“911, what’s your emergency?”
“My foster child has run away and is missing. We don’t know where he would’ve gone,” Logan replied coolly.
“Alright, please remain calm and describe what they look like to me,” the operator said.
“He’s a teenage boy, 16 years old…” Logan continued to give a description of Janus while Patton looked out the window as if Janus would suddenly appear and Patton could run outside and hug him tightly.
Patton didn’t even notice when Logan hung up and came over to him.
“We’ll find him Patton. I promise,” Logan said and pressed a kiss to his forehead.