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Rey looks over the twin suns. She had been on the Skywalker homestead for two weeks now. All her days seemed too bled into each other. Waiting. Just waiting for him to show.
Tears seems to fall even when she thought she had run out of tears long ago, but the aching void inside her, the bond silent and cold, trying to tell her something. Rey shook her head, fighting back more tears. She wouldn’t give up on him. Ben solo would come for her, she was sure of it. He would!
-
Something terrifying familiar, about finding herself alone – again - on a dessert planet, waiting for the person she loved to come back for her. Rey sighed and looked to the horizon, still hoping to see a familiar form. She knew she couldn’t leave here, she had to stay put next to the lightsabers. Hoping they, if not herself, would call out for him.
The first days and nights was spent in silent denial. Her mind insisting that Ben had only come through the bond to aid her. He had disappeared, but he would come, Rey would assure herself. He would come back for her. She was sure of it.
Then after days of meditating and seeking out her bond mate, trying to find him in the Force and trying to ignore how the bond was hollowed out, then reality came crashing down in the most brutal and painful way. She had not cried that much since her parents left her, begging and pleading to the Gods to have mercy. To give her Ben back! Her chest and throat hurt, curled up outside in the sand where she fell, screaming and sobbing in the fading light of the setting twin suns.
-
So now her days melted into each other, every morning waking up only to remember what happened and began to cry. Still clinging onto the hope that he would seek her out as a Force Ghost, even if it was only for goodbye.
When she had to make some of her dehydrated food packs from the Resistance base, it felt like the universe itself caused her this slight. Alone again… making these dehydrated nibbles while waiting for someone who would never show up. It was a cruel reminder how she was back where she started, abandoned to loneliness by the people she loved, however her bond with Ben left a hollow ache in her that no meditation could erase, no Force healing could heal. Rey hitched her breath, holding back the sobing.
Only when the last light was gone over the horizon, Rey finally allowed herself to drag her tired, cried out body to the small cot inside, huddling under a dusty blanket and whispering his name, praying to Ri’ia that he would come for her. “Please, Ben” she sniffled into the thin pillow. “Please, I need you here… please”.
-
With a heavy heart, Rey slowly began to realize Ben wouldn’t come back for her. she was truly alone. A disconnect inside her closing around the bond and her heart, making her numb as she stood sentry, looking over the horizon for him. He might have given up or even disappeared, but Rey wouldn’t … couldn’t give up on him.
She was tired. So very tired. Tired of crying, of being alone, of trying to be strong when she felt like crumbling down. Rey shook her head and dried away a single tear escaping. No, no more crying. She had to stay strong, she had to wait. He… he… had to come! A sob tore through her, the pain visiral inside her. she held her arms around herself, trying to control her breathing in vain.
“Of all the places I thought you had gone to…” a voice behind her made her turn. “… this was probably the last place I had imagined”. There in front of her was Ben Solo. Her Ben, as real as herself, standing there smiling at her.
“How” Rey choked out, her body swaying with dizziness. Quickly Ben was at her side, holding her up, looking down at her with those beautiful loving eyes. He gave her a little smile. “Did you really think I couldn’t hold my own with a little Force projection through our bond? Compared to my uncle who denied the Force for decades, I had trained endlessly”.
A sob tore from her and tears started to fall, her hands grabbing for his shirt, to touch him, to know he was really there. “You’re really here” she whispered. A bright smile spreading over her lips. Ben smiled and stroke away her tears with his thumbs. “I’m here”.
Overwhelmed, Rey met him in a passionate kiss, feeling the bond and hear heart open up once again, her sorrow lifted away from her and all she could do was smile against his lips, laugh and cry. He was here. He came back for her.
Ben embraced her in a hug, squeezing her close and whispered into her hair “you are not alone, Rey! Never again. I’m here”. Rey’s cries of joy and relief shook her entire body and Ben held onto her so fiercely, letting his side of the bond soothe her, assuring her through the bond as well, that they would always be like this. Together.
We are not alone anymore, she thought happily. Never again.