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Patrick first noticed the queasiness after a trip to Elmdale’s only Thai restaurant and didn’t think too much of it. He certainly had experienced that before, but when it lingered for more than a few days, he started to worry. They had been so careful. There was their anniversary trip to the spa about a month ago...and the hot tub.
“Stevie, can you meet me at our apartment for lunch?”
“Why Patrick, you’re a married man! I can’t go behind my best friend’s back.”
“Please don’t say anything to David.”
Something in Patrick’s voice told Stevie to just let it go.
“Of course. I’ll be there at 11:30.”
Stevie let herself in and found Patrick pacing back and forth in front of the door.
“Hey...what’s going on?”
“Ohmygod, Stevie. David is going to kill me.”
“Did you shrink a McQueen sweater?”
“Worse. Stevie, I’m pregnant!”
Stevie was quiet for a minute and looked at Patrick with big eyes.
“Wait. What did you just say?”
Patrick flopped down on the couch.
“I’m pregnant. David is going to...”
He’s cut off by Stevie hauling him to his feet and enveloping him in a giant hug.
“Oh my god, Patrick! This is incredible! I am so happy for you! I’m going to be an aunt! I’ve always wanted to be an aunt!!”
Stevie was practically vibrating with excitement.
Patrick sat down on the couch again.
“Have you met my husband, Stevie? David doesn’t want kids.”
“Are you sure about that? When your niece was here last month he looked quite smitten.”
“That was because he got to give her back at the end of the night. And he knew she wasn’t going to stay for 18 years. Oh my god.”
“Haven’t you ever talked about having kids? Surely you have.”
“Yes, but in the abstract ‘someday’ sense. Not NOW!”
Patrick was starting to hyperventilate.
“Take a deep breath and calm down. David loves you and if he talked someday you’ll just have to move the schedule up a little to now. You just have to find the right way to tell him.”
“Oh god, I haven’t even thought about that. Do I have to tell him?”
“In about 3 months he’s going to notice for sure, so I suggest telling him now. Are you 100% sure you’re pregnant?”
“Unless 6 home tests and the blood test at the doctor this morning are all lying, I’m definitely pregnant.”
“Hey, how are you feeling?” David walked into the bedroom where Patrick was sitting on the bed, sipping some tea and nibbling on dry toast.
“Ummm. I went to the doctor this morning.”
“And...”
“I....I don’t know how...,” Patrick couldn’t finish his sentence. The tears started.
“Oh my god. Are you sick? Is it that bad? We’ll get through this. I’ll do whatever you need. Do you need a kidney? I have an extra one. You can have it!”
Patrick starts laughing.
“Wait. What’s so funny? First you’re crying and telling me you’re sick and now you’re laughing?”
“It’s just...currently I have two extra kidneys, David.”
“Ohmygod...it’s a brain tumor, isn’t it? You’re delirious.”
“It’s not a brain tumor, David. It’s an entire person. I’m pregnant, David.”