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  1. Rec *

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    Summary

    Ilya doesn’t even try to stop the litany of Russian swears from spilling out. He also doesn’t stop himself from cursing Marly’s whole family line, and then verbalizing some of his more homicidal thoughts about Scott Hunter and the kitchen sink. He lets his Russian ranting die out and takes a few deep breaths.

    Everyone has quieted to look at him.

    “Feel better?” Marly asks.

    Maybe Ilya could drown Marly in the sink along with Hunter. Maybe he could kill everyone in the suite before Shane wakes up. He’d have to kill the butler guy, too…and the front of house staff…and the wedding chapel staff…and then convince Shane to run away with him to somewhere that would neither extradite to the US nor prosecute them for being gay. Messy. Too messy.

    OR

    Ilya wakes up with a wedding ring and a WHOLE LOT of questions...but at least Marly and Scott fucking Hunter are having a good time. This is Ilya's worst nightmare which, as it turns out, features a night of blackout drinking, misguided but supportive friends, and some VERY stupid decisions.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,399
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    721
    Kudos:
    3,380
    Bookmarks:
    778
    Hits:
    33,631

    20 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    i don't think i've had that much fun reading a fic in a LONG time. EVERYONE GO READ IT NOW!

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane: You all seriously want to do this?

    Shane: Like you know this is going to be on the internet forever, right?

     

    Ilya: Sorry everyone.

    Ilya: He still has this weird sense of self-preservation.

    Ilya: We're working on it.

     

    Bood: Come on, Hollander.

    Bood: It'll be fun!

    Bood: We'll all look like idiots together.

     

    Shane: That's not as comforting as you think it is.

     

    Evan: Is there a limit on the number of rainbows and dicks that can be on the shirt?

    Evan: Asking for the person I'm buying for who maybe definitely is named Shane Hollander.

     

    Shane: I hate all of you.

     

    Ilya: See you at the airport!! ✈️👕🏒

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,096
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    387
    Kudos:
    7,933
    Bookmarks:
    712
    Hits:
    30,394

    18 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane can’t stand his college roommate and teammate, Ilya Rozanov. Can’t stand his arrogance and his messiness and his constant sleeping around.

    But then the entire team, Shane included, welcomes their families to campus for Parents Weekend.

    And Shane also can’t stand that Ilya is alone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,937
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    792
    Kudos:
    22,576
    Bookmarks:
    5,104
    Hits:
    185,468

    17 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    this was really sweet!

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In a world where David doesn't walk in on Shane and Ilya at the cottage, what happens next?

    Well, Shane is his mother's son. He makes a plan.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,800
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    278
    Kudos:
    4,208
    Bookmarks:
    588
    Hits:
    24,617

    15 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    this was really good!! loved the characterisation of everyone.

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Lily: Sorry, I didn’t get to say goodbye

    Shane had found the message sweet despite his disappointment. Now it just feels… ominous.

    That’s usually the point when Shane has to get out of bed and pace around his bedroom and remind himself that, if Ilya is ghosting him (he is not, he’s not, he’s not), then he is also ghosting the rest of the fucking world. Because that is the thing that truly, really, terrifies him.

    No one has heard of Ilya Rozanov in nearly three weeks.

    Shane hasn’t been getting much sleep lately.

    Or:

    After Tampa. Things between Shane and Ilya are finally starting to look stable… until Ilya drops off the face of the Earth with little warning. Shane spirals (a lot) and decides he’s going to find his man if it’s the last thing he does.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,222
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    2,728
    Kudos:
    4,593
    Bookmarks:
    1,085
    Hits:
    119,105

    15 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    this was so so so so good. maybe my favourite one in the series. SO excited for the next one

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It took a moment for Ilya’s brain to catch up.

    “My father knows about me and Shane?”

    “The whole world knows about you and Shane! Did you not hear me?”

    Or: Shane's phone is stolen in Sochi. They're outed and and have to go on the run together to get out of Russia before being caught by the Russian authorities.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    71,877
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    922
    Kudos:
    4,421
    Bookmarks:
    1,548
    Hits:
    79,059

    14 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    holy shit this was so good!! incredibly well written.

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Seven members of the Ottawa Centaurs stand in the backyard of Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov. Each of the men holds a bag of candy as they joke with each other while Harris Drover sets up the shot. The sun is beginning to dip in the sky behind them, and the Stanley Cup sits on a makeshift stand made out of a cushioned lawn chair. Shane hovers close to the cup, and can be seen eyeing it with concern as Ilya watches him with amusement.]

    Shane: That doesn’t look very stable. We could have at least dragged the patio table out here.

    Ilya: It’s fine, sweetheart.

    Shane: I know, but it’s my day with the cup, I don’t want anything to happen to it.

    Ilya: Bood seasoned jerk chicken in there, yesterday. I think it will survive a little trauma candy salad dump in our backyard.

    Shane: That feels like a famous last words kind of scenario.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    285
    Kudos:
    8,675
    Bookmarks:
    757
    Hits:
    35,364

    13 Jul 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    He doesn’t mean for it to happen that way. He sees the asphalt before he reaches it.

    He thinks, Ilya.

    He doesn’t remember much after that.

    -

    SHANE HOLLANDER, CAPTAIN OF MONTREAL METROS, FOUND UNRESPONSIVE AFTER FALLING FROM APARTMENT BALCONY
    The incident occurred mere hours after rumors of the hockey star’s sexuality started circulating, stemming from an online video of a private conversation between the young captain and actress Rose Landry. There is no update on his current status after being moved to…

    Or, Shane gets outed and accidentally hurts himself, the world thinks he's tried to end his life, and Ilya struggles to come to terms with mortality in more than one sense of the word.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,264
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    1,053
    Kudos:
    15,152
    Bookmarks:
    3,976
    Hits:
    217,766

    13 Jul 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Text] LaPointe: You two can vote too I guess: which of you is the mom and which is the dad?

    [Text] Ilya: I am papa clearly

    [Text] Shane: We're neither. Because we're not your parents...

    [Text] Luca: That feels like something only a dad would say

    [Text: LaPointe: And not a very good dad 😔

    ----

    or, a month of texts between Ilya, Shane, and their rookies

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,423
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    470
    Kudos:
    18,815
    Bookmarks:
    1,487
    Hits:
    95,944

    10 Jul 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Tweet] @EvanDykstraOfficial: If hypothetically someone needed to get gum out of their toddler’s hair before their wife gets home, how would one do this? Asking for a friend

    [Tweet] @roz81: use olive oil. rub into gum. ta da gum gone

    [Tweet] @hazyhayes: Get a lot of gum stuck in your hairdo, Roz?

    [Tweet] @roz81: no but holmberg does not know how to spit gum out before napping on plane

    -----

    or, a childless Ilya Rozanov is somehow the go to guy for everyone's parenting advice needs

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,209
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    325
    Kudos:
    20,707
    Bookmarks:
    1,767
    Hits:
    130,185

    10 Jul 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Tweet] @roz81: what is omegaverse

    [Tweet] @rozbaddiesunite: SHHHH nobody tell him!!

    -----

    or Ilya discovers the omegaverse and makes the idea of a pregnant Shane everyone's problem

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,227
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    408
    Kudos:
    15,636
    Bookmarks:
    1,229
    Hits:
    106,045

    10 Jul 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Tweet] @roz81: I am coming moi malyshi. do not get into any strange white vans in meantime

    [Tweet] @roselandrysmistress: Why does he sound like my mother

    [Tweet] @TroyBbaby: Years of practicing and perfecting

    -----

    or the young Centaurs players have made it a goal in life to stress Ilya and Shane out at all times.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,801
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    242
    Kudos:
    17,355
    Bookmarks:
    1,394
    Hits:
    126,782

    10 Jul 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov is happier than he’s ever been and it’s all due to Jane. And yet, for some reason that Cliff can’t fathom, he refuses to propose to her. Cliff’s had enough. Rozy is going to buy a ring today.

    Cue Ilya buying a men’s engagement ring.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,530
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    336
    Kudos:
    12,802
    Bookmarks:
    1,386
    Hits:
    52,816

    08 Jul 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    [Ilya Rozanov yawns and stretches shirtless in his kitchen. Pajama pants hang low on his waist, and his hair is rumpled from sleep. He smiles and waves at the camera, and when he comes closer, he leans down so his face is level with the camera, his eyes bright even though he’s obviously tired.]

    Ilya: Good morning! It is ass o’clock, and I hate that I am awake, but today you are going to spend the day with me and my boyfriend. And I know what you are thinking, ‘what man could possibly be worthy of you, Ilya?’ and I get it. I ask myself this every day, but my boyfriend is very wonderful, even if he is much, much less famous than me and not nearly as good at hockey, and I think it’s about time you all get to know him. So, yay boyfriend reveal! And now I’m going to make him his disgusting breakfast smoothie, and then bring you along for our day together because my friend Harris Drover says I need more content on the internet, and what better way to do that than to tell you I’m bi, and that I have a boyfriend, and show you how disgustingly in love we are?

    [Ilya straightens so that his bare torso is the only thing in the frame, his abs flexing as he reaches over to turn on the blender.]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,293
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    470
    Kudos:
    11,851
    Bookmarks:
    1,188
    Hits:
    58,667

    08 Jul 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The group chat elects a new Head of the WAGs

    Harris
    Good morning, Roz

    Ilyusha 🩵
    Hello, traitor.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,693
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    310
    Kudos:
    7,624
    Bookmarks:
    497
    Hits:
    33,458

    08 Jul 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Luca: i fucked up
    Luca: i told ilya he was hot
    Luca: i showed him my fanart
    Luca: i SENT him my fanart

    G: LMAFOOOOOO
    G: literally why would you do that omg 💀

    Luca: I WAS DRUNK

    Or, 5 Times Luca almost revealed his Tumblr past and 1 time the Cens found out

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,227
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    107
    Kudos:
    2,080
    Bookmarks:
    253
    Hits:
    13,542

    07 Jul 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Several MLH players have their phones hacked.

    Most people find embarrassing photos.

    Ilya Rozanov accidentally leaks five years' worth of sex reviews.

    -

    You know that TikTok trend where people rate how good the sex was in front of their partner?

    Yeah. It's that.

     
    📢📢📢
    UPDATED: (second chapter) July 12, 2026

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,045
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    848
    Kudos:
    21,607
    Bookmarks:
    3,975
    Hits:
    166,421

    06 Jul 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After Scott Hunter comes out on national TV, Ilya wants nothing more than to go to Shane's cottage and figure out a way to make their relationship work. Too bad he broke things off and blocked Shane after the Montreal/Boston game that sent Shane to the hospital. Upon discovering that Shane has blocked him back, Ilya decides to show up at the cottage and win his Hollander back.

    Snippet:

    “Jane would not block me,” Ilya insisted again, even as his chest constricted with uncertainty. Ilya Rozanov did not get blocked, especially by pretty, pouty, freckled Canadians who meant everything.

    Marleau threw his hands out in helpless surrender, Ilya’s glare fierce enough to send him scurrying from the kitchen. Ilya waited a beat before carefully tapping Shane’s contact to call. He held his breath, heart sinking to the pit of his stomach as it rang once and connected to voicemail. Clenching his jaw, he hung up and tried again. Then one more time, torment ripping through his already tattered heart. This time when it connected, he left a message. Short, sweet, and full of intention even if Shane wouldn’t hear it. “I’m coming to the cottage.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,707
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    351
    Kudos:
    4,667
    Bookmarks:
    1,024
    Hits:
    58,832

    05 Jul 2026

  19. Public Bookmark 32

    Tags
    Summary

    “I think you could come six times in a night.” Ilya says, lounging on Shane’s large sofa one evening in Montreal.
    (In which Ilya uses Shane's competitive nature to wreck him, completely.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,591
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    206
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    4,993

    04 Jul 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov, captain of the Boston Raiders, has a boyfriend. A definitely real, suspiciously (and boringly) handsome, conveniently offline, consistently unable to meet up in real life boyfriend.

    Who lives in Canada.

    Unfortunately for him, absolutely no one believes him.

    The more serious Ilya gets about his Totally Real Canadian Boyfriend™️, the more concerned his teammates become that someone either needs to call MTV and get him on the next episode of Catfish or that he's slowly losing his mind.

    Shane Hollander is, fortunately, very real, very sarcastic, and increasingly delighted that an entire NHL locker room seems to think that he's a government psyop to distract Ilya from his game.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,633
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    1,275
    Kudos:
    16,803
    Bookmarks:
    2,790
    Hits:
    114,034

    04 Jul 2026

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