makattack444
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“You sold your dick?” Eddie says, voice pitching higher than it should. Everyone snaps to look at him, and Eddie’s cheeks suddenly flush with warmth. Okay. Maybe he’s drunk.
“No…not exactly,” Buck says, “I let them like… take a mould. Take some pictures. That’s not— it could be the lie! You guys have to guess!”
“No,” Eddie slurs, tilting forward, an accusatory finger pointed. “I don’t believe you. And the car thing is—” A slightly drunken hiccup. “Bullshit. You can’t tell two lies.”
Horrified at the allegation, Buck gasps, hand slapped against his sternum. “You think I’d— Eddie, the sanctity of two truths and a lie is really, really important to me.”
OR: One Life-Altering, Buck-Dick-Shaped Truth.
Bookmarked by makattack444
12 Jun 2026
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Eddie interrupts. “Well,” he says, turning fully to their waiter, “today’s kind of a special occasion, you see.”
Sven smiles. “Someone’s birthday?” He looks between Buck and Eddie.
“It’s actually, uh, our anniversary,” Eddie says, reaching out a hand to place over Buck’s.
Buck chokes, even though all the bread is safely in the bread basket.
or, buck wants a free tiramisu. eddie has a tried-and-tested plan to get it.
Bookmarked by makattack444
11 Jun 2026
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Eddie climbs onto the bed. They sit side by side, legs extended, two letter L’s protruding off the page. Instead of pressing play like Eddie is expecting, Buck laughs.
“What?” Eddie asks, an instinctive smile caressing his lips.
Buck grips his jaw, thumb brushing over his teeth before he bites at the broad nail, stifling. “Just—did you ever see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?”
Eddie nods. “Gene Wilder.”
“That’s the one,” Buck chuckles around his thumb, then lets it slide free. “You know the grandparents?”
Then Eddie’s laughing too. “Jesus,” he says on an exhale.
“I’m just saying,” says Buck, still giggling. “I’ve seen our future, and it’s bright.”
Or: God created the world in seven days. It only takes Eddie six to surreptitiously move into Buck’s house.
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Bookmarked by makattack444
11 Jun 2026
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Make a Deal With God (For Fifty Lemons) by beetlesandstars, twoslicetoast
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
29 Jun 2025
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Eddie: Steve just told me he and Buck went out the other night
On a dateJosh: Who is Steve?
Eddie: My gay gym buddy
Josh: Oh I’m sure
Hen: Wow
How do we feel about this?Eddie: Vindicated
This happening twice is a pattern, right?
I make a new friend, Buck tries to date themJosh: Yes
Hen: Yes
Karen: Yes
Or: Eddie makes a new friend and Buck is predictable.
Series
- Part 8 of 9-1-1 chat fics
Bookmarked by makattack444
11 Jun 2026
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Eddie huffs. It’s respectable and masculine, probably. “You know I’m not interested in—”
“Yes, Eddie, I know,” Buck drolls. “You’re off the horse. The meat market is closed. Your dick is on Do Not Disturb. I just think the pot shouldn’t be calling the kettle out,” he gestures between them with an emphatic finger, “for bad dates. Not when the pot is, ostensibly, a born-again virgin.”
“I’m not a born-again virgin,” Eddie grumbles. “Don’t start this again.”
“I’m not starting anything,” Buck lies. “I’m watching the movie.” Another lie. Then he flops unceremoniously back down, head strewn across Eddie’s clenched thighs.
Or: Buck’s mouth moves faster than Eddie’s brain.
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Bookmarked by makattack444
11 Jun 2026