infernalmelancholy
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Because he is the observer who does not belong to the world he strives to understand. His intelligence is something to own, but never may he dare to use it.
Aventurine’s mind is just as sharp as Ratio’s own, the only difference being Aventurine wields his like a weapon and Ratio clings to his like a shield.
This shield has always been reliable. When the world is too loud, to understand it is to make it quiet. When people are threatening, confusing, contradictory, to study them is to render them unsurprising and therefore harmless.
Behind his shield, Ratio has always been alone. To be alone is to be safe. Comfortable. Undisturbed.
Isolated. Above.
Alone.
Ratio, safe and sound behind his shield, has spent his life watching the shieldless fools fall.
Now, Aventurine has fallen and Ratio yearns for the cocoon of security which would allow him to avert his eyes from the sight.
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Fyodor’s left hand dances through the air, the tips of his fingers fluttering as though they’re pressing strings down against the slender neck of his cello.
Nikolai used to spend hours gazing at those hands as they played their sorrowful laments, dexterous fingers sliding, twitching, pressing, caressing, and his right hand curled so elegantly around the bow, dragging across the strings in smooth motions to produce a wailing so profound, so beautiful, even the marble angels who watch over graves, eternally serene, would weep at the sound.
He dared imagine the tips of those slim fingers pressed against his own skin, one tenderly wrapped around his throat and the other tracing fervent lines across his bowed body, urging his mouth to part and his voice to softly sing, caught on a sigh.
Now, such fantasies are the furthest thing from his mind.
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“You know what’s really sad?”
Chuuya rolls his eyes but there’s a glimmer of exasperated fondness in them and a smile is tugging at the corners of his lips though he’s trying his very best to fight it. “What?”
“We never had a honeymoon phase,” Dazai says with a mournful sigh.
Chuuya chuckles. “We certainly didn’t. Ours was more of a divorce phase.”
Dazai pouts. “I never got to call you sappy nicknames.”
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shattered porcelain by hellishsorrow (infernalmelancholy)
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
21 Jan 2024
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Exhaustion is carved deep into every beautiful line of his face, and it’s the kind of tiredness Tav knows won’t be erased by sleep. Shadows haunt the hollows of his cheeks and pain crests beneath his eyes. And his eyes, usually sharp, piercing, are dulled by unshed tears.
“I love you,” they whisper because they don’t know what else to say. There are no words more true to speak, no comfort softer and no warmth more intense than that simple reminder.
Series
- Part 2 of to heal an eternity
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i didn't choose to depend on you by infernalmelancholy
Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs
25 Nov 2023
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Nakahara Chuuya is the single most insufferable person to ever grace the earth. Of this, Dazai is absolutely certain.
Mori regularly argues Dazai’s certainties by reminding him he’s fifteen and really doesn’t know much at all with absolute certainty. Consequently, Dazai has become absolutely certain that no one, not even Mori, is capable of understanding his level of genius.
Recent series
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to heal an eternity by hellishsorrow (infernalmelancholy)
Fandom Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
21 Jan 2024
Summary
a series of stand-alone oneshots of astarion getting all the love and comfort he deserves.
- Words:
- 4,361
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 3
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My Happiness Is...(Or the one where they figure it out together. Eventually) by infernalmelancholy
Fandom SK8 the Infinity (Anime)
27 Jul 2021
- Words:
- 29,599
- Works:
- 9
- Bookmarks:
- 42
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“I know, I know you work so much. I see that. And all those plans of yours must take so much time… and I, as your loyal servant, understand it all. And no, I wasn’t thinking of rats. Maybe a bird… a dove, perhaps? They’re gentle. Sweet.” His gaze drifted to the floor. The dark lingered there, heavy and patient. The apple would remain where it had vanished until morning.
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A brief conversation.
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"I'm not," Jouno hisses, "fucking scared."
Another clap of thunder sounds outside. Jouno fails miserably at hiding his flinch.Bookmarked by infernalmelancholy
09 Aug 2023