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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Tim falls into a pollen-induced coma, courtesy of Poison Ivy. It takes a while for the Bats to figure out that he isn't just sleeping.

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    07 Sep 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “How long have we worked together -- seven years?” Hal asked. “Did you know Batman was married?”

    “No,” Barry said, shrinking back a little in his seat.

    “No offense,” Oliver said, turning back to Bruce. “But who would be unlucky enough to marry you?”

    or, the one where Batman lets a crucial detail slip during a Justice League meeting and an unlikely ally steps in.

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    31 Aug 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Tim Drake? I’m calling in regard to Damian Wayne—”

     


    When Tim said he’d do anything to get out of work this is not what he meant.

     




    Or, Damian Gets In Trouble And Tim’s The Only One There To Pick Him Up, Misunderstandings Ensure


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    28 Aug 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    At first, Sirius had simply perfected the art of silence under Veritaserum, and been content with that. Silence was safest in that house. But Walburga had not relented in the frequency of her dosages, and Sirius, who had always been a perfectionist, took it as a challenge. By fourteen he could tell a lie unflinching while it coursed through his veins. By fifteen he could do it with a smile on his face. By sixteen he could make it look effortless.

    Tell us something.

    Sirius grinned sharply, and with practiced ease, he lied: “I am the pride and joy of the Noble House of Black, and Walburga’s favorite son.”

    OR

    The Marauders take Veritaserum, and quickly realize it’s not Sirius’s first time.

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    25 Aug 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    A Disclaimer From Your Friendly Neighborhood Oracle:

    The following is a transcript of Patrol Communications Audio written by state of the art transcription technology, IRIS (Interpretation of Recorded Intelligence Software). IRIS was created to provide easily searchable records, automatically, and eliminate the need to transcribe each patrol audio log manually. That being said, IRIS is still experimental, and may not always be entirely accurate.
    -
    (01:25) Red Hood: (Mild static) (Out of breath, slurred) You motherfuckers. Put some fuckin-

    Batman: (Shaking) Red Hood-

    Red Hood: Shut up. Put some fucking respect. On my name. Start fucking copying me. I just got thrown fucking. Um. 40 feet. Into a fucking uh. What's it. Ditch. I'm still fucking conscious.

    Batman: Red Hood, do not move, we're en route-

    Red Hood: What'll I win if I stand up.

    Batman: (Loud) Do not stand up.

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    19 Aug 2025