almoststranded



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    Stuck in an alt-world where he and Shane never hooked up as teenagers, Ilya is determined to get Shane back. To do that, Ilya has to figure out a way to get Shane to see him as anyone other than the Russian asshole who has spent a decade pissing him off. It can't be that hard to make your husband fall in love with you... right?

    Basically: Shane Hollander makes a wish with good intentions. Ilya Rozanov wakes up confused, single, closeted, and miserable in Boston.

    +Bonus Chapter where AltWorld!Ilya wakes up confused, married, out, and carefree in Ottawa

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    Chapters:
    8/8
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    22 Feb 2026

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  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane: Why is Melissa from the Raiders Foundation texting me?
    Shane: Ilya
    Shane: What did you do

    Ilya: ah
    Ilya: you are wag now yes?

    Shane: Ilya

    Ilya: i gave your number to hammersmith’s wife
    Ilya: she thinks i need help with the charity basket
    Ilya: and you know all my favorite things

    With Shane's new WAG status comes new responsibilities. Particularly with the Boston Raiders Foundation.

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    10 Jun 2026

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    “Okay?” Ilya’s voice is softer now.

    A thousand questions underlie that single word. Are we really going to do this? Are we willing to admit that this is worth finding out about? Is this worth fighting for?

    They can’t. Maybe they could have before, but if this is true, if Shane is— Shane can’t.

    “Okay,” he breathes out, instead, foolish and doomed.

    Or: Ilya comes from a line of vampire hunters. Shane gets turned into a vampire right after finding out.

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    10 Jun 2026

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    Emmy: When did you first hook up with him?
    Jane: 2010
    Caro: WHAT
    Megan: GIRL
    Tia: SEVEN YEARS??
    Megan: My jaw is borderline unhinged rn

    Or: In 2017, Shane finds a place where he can talk about his sex life...a group chat for girls who have slept with Ilya Rozanov

    Language:
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    16,282
    Chapters:
    7/12
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    01 Jun 2026

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  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya: Are you waiting for my plane to leave, Hollander?
    Jane: No
    Ilya: So we leave the cottage and you don't want to be honest anymore?
    Jane: Ok fine. I am. Is that silly?
    Ilya: No. I am taking photos of birds just to have something to talk to you about.
    Jane: You can always talk to me
    Jane: And you can always be honest with me. We should probably try to keep that cottage honesty thing going as long as we can?
    Ilya: Ok

    Or: It's 2017, and Shane and Ilya need to figure out how to be long-distance boyfriends. Most of the time all they can do is text each other.

    (Fics in the series are standalone stories that share loose connections and references.)

    Series
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    English
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    6/6
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    28 May 2026

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