Zesttt



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  1. Rec *

    Tags
    Summary

     “I need your help.” 

    Ilya peers up again and raises an eyebrow. He pauses the video he was watching. “With?” 

    Shane fidgets. “I, uh… I can’t– I mean, I can but I’m not very good– Fuck, listen, just– Ineedyoutohelpmewithsex.” 

    A pause. A long pause. Ilya blinks a couple of times, mouth twitching at the corners. Then,

    “You need me to teach you how to fuck your girl, Hollander?”

    Shane needs help satisfying his girlfriend, Jessica. He turns to his roommate, Ilya, for help.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,079
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    561
    Kudos:
    10,110
    Bookmarks:
    1,904
    Hits:
    67,040

    05 Jun 2026

  2. Rec *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane Hollander has been out of the dating game for a few years. Deciding to get back into it, he goes to a speed dating event recommended by a friend. He isn't expecting much, just a chance to get his feet wet, but is surprised to meet the love of his life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,335
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Comments:
    344
    Kudos:
    1,632
    Bookmarks:
    444
    Hits:
    26,618

    03 Jun 2026

  3. Rec *

    Words:
    12,949
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    996

    01 Jun 2026

  4. Rec *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov really, really wants Shane Hollander's asshole. First they got cockblocked by a snowstorm. Then Hollander, certified anxious flower that he is, decided to play hard to get. Ilya has spent almost two years periodically texting his rival, hoping the latter will finally agree to hook up again. Ilya hopes to stumble upon the correct sexting-to-rage-baiting ratio, enough for Hollander to get over whatever mental hurdles he's having.

    And then, as luck would have it, Ilya meets Shane Hollander's ex-girlfriend Jessica. Of course, Ilya is not above playing dirty in order to achieve his goals...

    Chaos ensues, unlikely friendships are forged through general assholery, and jury's still out on who takes the crown as greatest menace of them all.
    ___

    A mostly funny, occasionally wholesome story about friends who have your back, even when they're dicks about it! Told mainly through texts and tweets.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,176
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    345
    Kudos:
    1,910
    Bookmarks:
    358
    Hits:
    23,225

    31 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

  5. Rec *

    Summary

    A mostly crackfic series that asks, what if Shane and Ilya were slightly out of character? Shane is bitchier, Ilya is manic and philosophical, Cliff Marleau and the Boston boys take turns babysitting their crashing-out captain, and Shane finally gets recognized as the pretty, funny, sassy player he is.

    Nothing is too serious about this, it's a mix of show and book canon, and a healthy dose of fanon (himbo king Cliff). Ilya is allowed to catch feelings early, as a treat and Shane is allowed to let his inner mean girl out.

    Please enjoy these silly boys and their silly relationships! Four works so far with more to come! How much more? I don't know! They keep doing silly things and my brain keeps writing it down.

    Thanks for reading! 💕

    Words:
    36,672
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    1,370

    28 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Lol actually laughed out loud ✨️