Whymsie
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Summary
Much to Elias’ dismay, Jon doesn’t actually want to be an Archivist.
Also… well, as Georgie put it: “There are only two situations where you’d say someone ‘died in the line of duty’: if they were actually a literal soldier, or else if you’re a serial killer and you’re not actually that committed to pretending you didn’t kill them. Unless Gertrude died in a top-secret war that’s going on in the basement of the Magnus Institute, I see only one option here.”
Jon glared, but Georgie shrugged. “Sorry, Jon, I just call it like I see it. Your boss is a serial killer and you’re next on his hit list. Probably best not to take his creepy cursed job position.”
~
In which Jon and Georgie are flatmates, the archives crew rock their dysfunction to the fullest, and the only thing that resembles canon is the way absolutely no one is cishet.
Series
- Part 1 of Anchorage
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,887
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 3
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- 255
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Bookmarked by Whymsie
18 Jun 2026
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Martin makes Jon tea for the first time about a week into his transfer. It’s horrible. Gag-reflex inducing. Somehow sporting all the wrong flavors.
For some reason, he does not have the heart to break this to Martin.
Little does Jon know that Martin actually makes wonderful tea. Just not for him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,336
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 357
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- 4,844
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- 1,082
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- 26,867
Bookmarked by Whymsie
18 Jun 2026
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Then a man walks past him, he looks at him, and a swooping sensation in his gut says yes. It isn’t the vampire part of him. He’s just… really pretty. Really Martin’s type. Short and small, neat and well put together, tired and professional, with perfect posture and a quick, impatient stride. He looks like he works in an office. He looks about a decade older than Martin. He looks important, and dignified, and hot. In that very particular way that Martin’s always been into.
Not that… not that attractiveness should have anything to do with picking a meal. Oh, it sounds bad to call people meals. Victims? Even worse.
Martin should in fact not pick this man, specifically because of how attracted he is to him. It would be the responsible thing to do.
Except he’s already following him. And he’s hungry.
Series
- Part 1 of enthralling
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,553
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 459
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- 4,960
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- 800
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- 40,009
Bookmarked by Whymsie
17 Jun 2026
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“It’s a preexisting condition,” Jon explains, sipping more bitter tea. “I sort of got—hm. You know Spiderman?”
Tim raises an eyebrow.
“Heard of him, yeah.”
Jon nods, studying his tea.
“It’s sort of like that,” he says. “A spider killed and ate me when I was a child, and now I can’t stay dead.”
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Resurrection isn't all it's cracked up to be.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,587
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 7
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- 517
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- 5,084
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- 1,814
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- 52,468
Bookmarked by Whymsie
17 Jun 2026
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Summary
10:12 PM
Jared Boneturner:
the arm bone was a femuur :) i looked it up
Elias:
Humerus.
Jared Boneturner:
yeah it was pretty funny :)-
i just want the avatars to have 1) a groupchat 2) twitters. and i dont have any photoshop skills but i CAN write a chatfic like its 2014 again.Series
- Part 2 of elias gets bullied
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 22,309
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Comments:
- 1,857
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- 6,071
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- 845
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- 70,331
Bookmarked by Whymsie
17 Jun 2026