WhyNoDogs



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger somehow managed to act cordially when they had to room together in the eighth year dormitory at Hogwarts. So when a paperwork mix-up means they'll have to do the same at Oxford University, Hermione assumes it won't be so bad.

    But something is off here at Oxford, and she can't quite put her finger on it.

    She's definitely learned one important lesson at university: everyone should give a fuck about an Oxford comma.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    195,707
    Chapters:
    34/34
    Comments:
    453
    Kudos:
    408
    Bookmarks:
    260
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    20 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 63

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    Summary

    Draco had a problem.

    It was a Hermione Granger-shaped problem. It walked like Hermione Granger, it talked like Hermione Granger, and (when he was lucky), it chewed him out like Hermione Granger.

    But he knew, deep down, that it wasn’t Hermione Granger.

    Because there was no way on God’s green earth that Hermione Granger had those fucking tits.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,852
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    529
    Bookmarks:
    63
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    4,301

    14 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “When I want the world to know I’m fucking you, Granger, you’ll be the first to know.” He grunted, digging his fingertips into her hip and leaning into her. “Right now, you’re mine.”

    Hermione is at a dead end in her career and her relationship, and her self worth has never been lower. Although she loves her job advocating for creature rights as a mid-level bureaucratic drone for Blaise Zabini's law firm, Hermione has found that it's more of an escape from her miserable relationship. However, one wizard sees through her carefully cultivated facade and offers her a deal that she can't resist: in exchange for funding research necessary to garner support on a piece of legislation for creatures rights that she's been working towards the majority of her career, Draco Malfoy simply wants Hermione's company—and anything else she's willing to give him.

     

    *Not abandoned, I'm just a trash panda with the attention span of a gnat at the moment lol*

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,659
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    123
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    801
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    233
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    26,157

    25 Feb 2026

  4. Rec *

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    Summary

    A young Hermione Granger is sorted into Slytherin House alongside the King's nephew, Draco Malfoy.
    There's Gods, Duels, Mermaids, Excalibur, Dragons, and a stupidly clever Hermione.
    Set Hogwarts years 1-7 and beyond.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,727,779
    Chapters:
    215/?
    Collections:
    11
    Comments:
    5,878
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    7,791
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    2,239
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    656,853

    22 May 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Wonderfully inventive story with H&D. Includes kings, mermaids, gods and a really, big dragon king.