Watsonite



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Searching I woke up with a pussy brings anything from porn results to Creepypasta forums. Shane miserably clicks on a Reddit thread, trying in vain to find any sort of answers when there's a knock on the bathroom door. 

    "Shane? Are you feeling ok?" 

    "I- yeah." Shane jumps, nearly dropping his phone. "I'm fine. Why?"

    There's a pause. "Are you sick?"

    Shane swallowed. Was he sick? Is that what triggered this? 

    "You have been in there for almost half an hour. If you are sick, I want to know." 

    "No, not like-  not like that." Shane flushed. God, how was he gonna explain this? 

    ・・・・・

    On their first day of summer vacation, Shane wakes up with a pussy. He decides to hide it from Ilya and wait for it to go away. This decision has consequences.

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    25 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    He only realizes he’s doing it when it’s too late to stop.

    He’s standing in the drink aisle of the grocery store, checking the expiration dates on the cans of Coke, mentally cross-checking them with Boston’s away game schedule, and the reality hits him like someone shook one of those cans and popped it open. A snap. A fizz. A mess.

    Shane is making space for Ilya.

     

    (or, lessons in budget-friendly shopping, home decor, and resisting the urge to neatly combine all your situationship’s shit into a drawer in your bedroom because you might be falling in love with him: a seven-ish step guide by shane hollander, who is so, so fucked)

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    24 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    ESPN: Shane Hollander To the Ottawa Centaurs after Tumultuous End to Montreal Metros Career

    @CentaursGirlie1995: obviously i feel very badly for shane but my beautiful failson of a team getting the two best players because of homophobia is perhaps the only good thing homophobia has ever done

    --

    Or: Shane's first season on the Ottawa Centaurs, as told by everyone else in the world.

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    17 Jun 2026

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    ...oh,” his mom says. “Oh, honey, you were seeing someone? You never said anything.”

    “It’s-it’s complicated.” He catches the present tense too fucking late to do anything about it, and he barely resists the urge to either groan or slip forward to start beating his head against the coffee table.

    Fuck his fucking life.

    “You’re still…seeing this person?” His mom asks, and the amount of control he can hear her exerting is almost painful. “Who is-”

    “Yuna,” his dad cuts in, voice quiet, “maybe give him a second, yeah?”

    Yeah, Shane agrees in his head. Give him a second.

    Maybe give him a decade while they’re at it.

    (when shane's old fake id falls out of his wallet around his parents, he has to explain that it was to book hotel rooms before he was 21)

    (...and then he has to explain why he needed to book those hotel rooms in the first place)

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    11 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya posts a casual video of himself covered in a necklace of hickeys given to him by his beautiful, freaky boyfriend. In an unfortunate turn of events, girls all over the world join forces to share the details and video evidence of their own sexual exploits with Russia’s pass-around party boy. Shane is not at all consumed by jealousy and absolutely does not fall into a spiral of competitive obsession over these events.

    Or, 5 times Shane tries to be as good as every girl that Ilya’s ever been with, + 1 time Ilya shows him that he has always been better.

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    10 Jun 2026