SarumanMan
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WANTED: Female, aged 20-30, to be my date for Christmas eve dinner with my Italian-American family. Must be willing to eat my mom’s cooking. No physical intimacy required. No strings attached—I will drive you home after. 4pm-10pm, 12/24. Salary negotiable. Call Carmen: (773) 555-0901.
OR: The one in which Sydney just needs a job, and Carmy will die before he proves Richie right.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 100,000
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 909
- Kudos:
- 3,839
- Bookmarks:
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Bookmarked by SarumanMan
11 Jul 2026
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how memory makes monsters into myth by blueskiddoo
Fandoms: Interview with the Vampire (TV 2022)
16 Sep 2024
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“I said I’m fine, Alice,” Daniel snaps, and time itself grinds to a halt.
Not literally. Ha. The things you have to specify with vampires. Daniel wishes he could laugh, but the sound is stuck somewhere in his throat, along with his heart. Now, of course, his hand chooses to be perfectly still.
Why the fuck did he say that?
*
daniel keeps slipping up and mistaking armand for his ex-wife and the more he looks back on his memories, the less reliable they get. he's pretty sure he married alice molloy, but how do you marry a woman who apparently never existed?
armand is armand about it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 54,354
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Comments:
- 734
- Kudos:
- 3,874
- Bookmarks:
- 980
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- 72,126
Bookmarked by SarumanMan
18 Oct 2025
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An Ever-Fixed Mark by AMarguerite
Fandoms: Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice & Related Fandoms
28 Oct 2017
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One would think that having the name of one's soulmate appear on one's wrist on one's sixteenth birthday would make matrimony much less complicated. It mostly does not. And not at all for Miss Elizabeth Bennet of Longbourne.
(A deconstruction of the "soulmate identifying mark" trope, using "Pride and Prejudice." Trigger warnings in the tags.)
Series
- Part 1 of An Ever-Fixed Mark
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 190,537
- Chapters:
- 19/19
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 3,955
- Kudos:
- 6,069
- Bookmarks:
- 2,438
- Hits:
- 290,430
Bookmarked by SarumanMan
08 Sep 2025
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The Cat's Guide to Compromise by pearlyeverlasting
Fandoms: Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice & Related Fandoms, Pride and Prejudice (2005), Pride and Prejudice (1995)
26 May 2020
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Elizabeth Bennet refuses to be compromised. Elizabeth Bennet suspects that Fitzwilliam Darcy is actually a feral cat in a human body. This all works surprisingly well.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,004
- Chapters:
- 11/11
- Collections:
- 17
- Comments:
- 786
- Kudos:
- 3,447
- Bookmarks:
- 1,235
- Hits:
- 55,085
Bookmarked by SarumanMan
04 Sep 2025
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This will sound a little ridiculous, no matter how Sasuke phrases it. I see dead people is embarrassingly tacky, and I'm half-spirit seems like something Sakura might say when she's stoned sky high. So he settles for a shrug.
Series
- Part 2 of Sharingan Rising
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 200,086
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 62
- Comments:
- 2,695
- Kudos:
- 14,312
- Bookmarks:
- 5,183
- Hits:
- 535,155
Bookmarked by SarumanMan
23 Jul 2017