Rookie27
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where is the real me (i'm lost and it kills me) by Ellitheria
Fandoms: The Rookie (TV 2018)
11 Apr 2024
Tags
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
- Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Tim Bradford & Lucy Chen
- Tim Bradford
- Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- post breakup
- post 6x06
- end of season spec
- breakups and makeups
- Tim goes to therapy
- Tim writes letters
- Tim pov
- Angst
- Angst with a Happy Ending
- Angst and Hurt/Comfort
- Ambiguous/Open Ending
Summary
Removing myself from the equation would be best for everyone.
But I’m selfish and I want to see you every day.
I need to see you every day.
I love you, baby, and even though I know my love isn’t enough, I cling to it like a life raft at sea.
I think I’d just drown if it weren’t for you.
Yours,
TimOR
Tim goes to therapy and heals in stops and starts. He writes Lucy letters along the way.
Series
- Part 7 of Season 6 Episode Follow-Up Fics! ✨
Bookmarked by Rookie27
12 Apr 2024
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You are the best thing that's ever been mine by niamsagram
Fandom The Rookie (TV 2018), The Rookie - Fandom
- General Audiences, Teen And Up Audiences, Mature, Explicit
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- F/M
- Series in Progress
20 Jun 2026
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
- Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Tim Bradford & Ashley McGrady
- Lucy Chen & Chris Sanford
- (mentions of Lucy & chris)
- mentions of Tim & Ashley
- Tim Bradford & Angela Lopez
- Lucy Chen & Tamara Collins
- Isabel Bradford & Tim Bradford
- Lucy Chen & Noah Foster
- Lucy Chen & Smitty
- Lucy Chen & Angela Lopez
- Lucy Chen/Chris Sanford
- Lucy Chen & Aaron Thorsen
- Tim Bradford & Aaron Thorsen
- Isabel Bradford & Lucy Chen
- Gennifer Bradford & Tim Bradford
- Tim Bradford & Rachel Hall
- Lucy Chen & Rachel Hall
- Lucy Chen & John Nolan (The Rookie)
- John Nolan/Bailey Nune
- Wesley Evers/Angela Lopez
- Gennifer Bradford & Lucy Chen
- Lucy Chen & Nyla Harper
- Lucy Chen & Jackson West
- Tim Bradford & Smitty (The Rookie)
- Celina Juarez & John Nolan
- Tim Bradford & Lucy Chen
- Lucy Chen & Vanessa Chen
- Lucy Chen & Patrick Chen
- Tim Bradford/Ashley McGrady
- Tim Bradford/Rachel Hall
- Isabel Bradford/Tim Bradford
- Tim Bradford & Tamara Colins
- Tim Bradford & Wade Grey
- Tim Bradford & Tim Bradford's Nephews
- Lucy Chen & John Nolan
- Tim Bradford & Noah Foster
- Tim Bradford
- Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Angela Lopez
- Tamara Collins
- Ashley McGrady
- Isabel Bradford
- Noah Foster (The Rookie)
- Chris Sanford
- Noah Foster
- Smitty (The Rookie)
- Lucy Chen
- Nyla Harper
- Vanessa Chen
- Aaron Thorsen
- John Nolan
- Celina Juarez
- mention of Ashley McGrady
- Gennifer Bradford
- Avery Bradford (OC)
- Tim’s daughter
- Rachel Hall
- John Nolan (The Rookie)
- Bailey Nune
- Wesley Evers
- Original Male Character(s)
- Jackson West
- Lieutenant Pine (The Rookie)
- Patrick Chen
- Tim Bradford's Nephews
- Ava Bradford- OC
- James Murray (The Rookie)
- Kojo the Dog (The Rookie)
- Tamara Colins
- Wade Grey
- Ava Bradford-OC
- Rosalind Dyer
- mention of Caleb Wright
- Carradine
- metro team members
- Original Characters
- Ava Bradford- Original Character
- Daisy Bradford- original character
- Dylan- OC
- Lauren- OC
- mention of Chris Sanford
- Chasity - Character
- Blair London
- Miles Penn
- Emmett Lang
- Joy Bradford
- Gennifer "Genny" Bradford
- Fluff
- A little angst
- Tim just wants to know
- They love each other
- Comfort
- Relationship Talk
- wedding vows
- absolutely fluff
- tim loves Lucy so much he cries in this
- Lucy cries too though
- so does Angela
- it’s not angsty
- It’s fluff
- Fake Proposal
- good communication
- tim & Lucy talk
- Talking
- post 5x21
- Angst
- Honesty
- Tim would do anything for Lucy
- Jealously
- tim loves Lucy though
- Insecurity
- Isabel being there brings up feelings
- Love
- Jealousy
- tim wonders
- they talk like always
- Lucy reassured him
- Pining
- pining and drunk
- Lucy confesses love but not to Tim at first
- Hurt
- she thinks he doesn’t love her but boy is she wrong
- I can’t tag for shit
- 3+1
- Idiots in Love
- Tim is mentioned and then he shows up
- he loves Lucy
- Post 5x22 hug
- Established Relationship
- Lucy is Worried
- Tim reassures her
- Post-UC (The Rookie)
- UC talk
- they talk and fight
- puzzle talk
- A lot of angst beware
- they take a break
- UC work
- Tim is nervous
- Angst with a Happy Ending
- Happy Ending
- talks
- Lucy is honest with Tim
- Tim and Lucy love each other
- Tumblr Prompt
- Established Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- mentions of Tim & Ashley - Freeform
- Hurt/Comfort
- Fluff and Angst
- Light Angst
- Domestic Fluff
- Love Confessions
- Taylor swift lyrics as usual
- Lucy is jealous
- Tim knows kind of
- Talk about the first kiss
- Pre-Relationship
- Emotional Hurt/Comfort
- lucy gets hurt
- Aaron is afraid of Tim
- lucy just laughs
- Alludes to 5x20
- Protective Tim Bradford
- Hurt Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Fight & Makeup
- actual communication between adults
- smitty talks too much
- Tim is upset
- Lucy is upset
- Sickfic
- Worried Tim Bradford
- Parent Tim Bradford
- Parent Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Mention of the possibility of miscarriage
- Pregnant Lucy Chen
- Girl Dad Tim Bradford
- Truth or Dare
- Lucy forces Tim to play truth or dare
- Grumpy Tim Bradford
- they just talk tbh
- it doesn’t get saucy till the end
- Tipsy Tim
- tim is jealous
- Noah is just there for a good time
- Marriage Proposal
- Bomb threat
- they are saved
- Protective Parent Tim Bradford
- little angst
- Chenford become parents
- Tim is a girl dad
- Tumblr Prompts
- Chris is a dick
- i don’t like Chris if you couldn’t tell
- First Anniversary
- This is pure fluff
- Some angst
- tim bradford is a softy
- Pet Names
- tim calls lucy baby and I need it to be canon
- work vibes
- Tim encourages Lucy to talk to Rachel
- a little hurt
- Soft Tim Bradford
- Tim Bradford & Lucy Chen Talk
- Wesley messes up
- writer does not like Chris Sanford
- talking about exes
- chris Sanford mention
- ashley McGrady mention
- Falling In Love
- Almost Love Confessions
- Soft
- Sick Character
- Tim takes care of Lucy
- this is pure softness and fluff
- Tim is confused by his feelings
- Genny and Lucy hang out
- girls night
- Lunch
- Honesty talk
- undercover work talk
- Mention of Isabel - Freeform
- Lucy teases Tim
- and this becomes soft
- 4 + 1
- Smut
- Laundry room hookup
- 5x21
- Canon Compliant
- lock the door first
- insane
- during a UC op too
- Lucy leaves drunk voicemails
- this covers all the seasons 1-5
- mention of Caleb
- Angst and Feels
- I forgot to tag???
- Smitty finds out
- heatwave 5x13
- hurt!fic
- Worried Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Hurt Tim Bradford
- Tim is a daddy cop
- daddy cop
- Lucy is horny
- tim is horny
- tim in metro
- mostly everyone is in this.
- tagged it M just in case
- there is a hard case at the end
- Lucy wearing Tim’s clothes
- Secret Relationship
- parent Lucy Chen
- chris isn’t bad in this he’s just kind of an idiot
- Engaged Chenford
- Bank Robbery
- mention of past child abuse
- Tim’s mom
- birthday celebration
- Traditions
- tim is a softy
- Lucy loves him
- no judgement
- 4+1
- Sexting
- they sext at work
- lucy gets a hickey
- it’s not mature until the end
- hurt lucy
- Protectiveness
- Fluff and Smut
- The lose their clothes
- but find them
- Nightmares
- secret confessions
- idiots in love but they don’t know it
- There’s a lot of feelings in this one
- Angela is a good friend - Freeform
- Chris is annoying
- Chris is a dick in this one
- Canon Divergence
- post DoD
- Fear of small spaces
- Panic Attack
- Trapped in Elevator
- Mentions of Chris - Freeform
- mention of Rosalind
- Past Trauma
- Secret Admirer
- Mild Hurt/Comfort
- Mostly Fluff
- Fix-It of Sorts
- What-If
- Pre Canon
- 5x08
- Really Lucy just thinking about everything
- Introspection
- Future Fic
- married chenford
- tim meets Lucy’s parents
- lucy parents are not understanding in this one
- Tim Loves Lucy
- Meeting the Parents
- Secret Marriage
- Marriage
- pure fluff
- In Love
- 5+1
- angela calls them out
- They can’t keep a secret
- Chenford
- stressed out Tim Bradford
- Alternate Timeline
- before Vegas
- Tim has feelings
- established chenford
- Dancing
- at a wedding
- Nolan and baileys wedding
- tim thinks about past relationships
- lucy chooses him
- Mentions of past child abuse
- Also his past girlfriends are just mentioned they are not physically in it
- why do I prefer this timeline
- I Wrote This While Listening to Taylor Swift's Music
- Fertility Issues
- trouble getting pregnant
- Parenthood
- This is heavy
- Domestic Bliss
- ashley is there but she’s blah
- lucy gets all the snacks
- Game Night
- Meddling Angela Lopez
- Setting up Chenford
- Like Confessions
- they are in love but they just got together give them a break
- Horny Teenagers
- Angela just wants them to stop being idiots
- Humor
- light angst though.
- Chris’s version
- he’s between an idiot and a clueless clown in this
- Lucy puts him in his place
- Originally Posted on Tumblr
- tumblr promot
- Tim Bradford in Metro
- quality sexy time
- Circa S4
- Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen Have No Personal Space
- Confessions
- high on painkillers
- based on new girl episode
- Episode: s02e19 Quick Hardening Caulk (New Girl)
- It’s great
- feelings come out
- So does Lucy
- Co-workers
- Living Together
- Heavy Angst
- Tim gets shot
- Lucy is pregnant
- this is based on a Friends episode
- the one where Ross finds out
- Drunk Voicemail
- Tim leaves a drunk voicemail for Lucy
- emotional angst
- Ashley is barely in this
- Family fun
- Ava Bradford is chaotic but she’s cute
- seriously fluff galore
- Beach Day
- mention of double date
- Chris and Ashley too
- catching stares
- Daddy’s girl
- Tim Bradford is a girl dad argue with the wall
- tyler Bradford approves of Lucy Chen
- Chris is an idiot
- alludes to doppelgänger episode
- Pregnancy Scares
- lucy is in her feelings
- So is Tim
- observations on chenford
- Hurt Lucy Chen
- tumblr post
- Protective
- Angst and Hurt/Comfort
- Engaged Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Smitty being smitty
- Sad Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Nyla is a good friend
- exasperated Lucy Chen
- based on the end of 5x03
- Protective Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Chris and Ashley aren’t in this much
- tw: alcohol as comping mechanism
- Making Out
- Horny Chenford
- mention of Caleb and DOD
- copycat Caleb
- Feelings
- Protective Boyfriend Tim Bradford
- Ashley and Chris are in this but both get dumped
- rain kiss
- Lucy can’t
- Lucy checking Tim out
- Tim & Lucy friendship
- I’m not sure how this got so long but here we are
- Ashley is insecure
- Lucy is in love
- so is tim but not with Ashley
- Sick Fic
- Sick Lucy Chen
- tim checks lucy out
- He gets distracted in this a lot
- Tim Bradford is a girl dad
- Proud Tim Bradford
- Stubborn Lucy Chen
- Comforting Tim Bradford
- Soft Lucy Chen
- she loves him so much
- Lucy is his work wife and wife
- Fluff and Humor
- Detectives
- Detective Lucy Chen
- Taylor Swift Lyrics
- Ava is chaotic as usual
- Storytelling
- After 5x13
- I changed it a little bit
- heat wave
- Post 5x11
- baseball Tim bradford
- TO Tim Bradford
- undercover lucy
- Isabel returns
- mentions of UC school
- Noah ships Chenford
- Chris is once again a complete dingbag
- Tim is Not Having It
- I’m counting this as my Labor Day fic
- Alludes to 5x03
- pre canon Chenford
- lucy did deserve better
- and Tim proves that
- this was fun to write
- fake engagement
- Office Sex
- rated E
- they are both horny lol
- Horny Tim Bradford
- Horny Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Drunk Tim
- Set During 5x01
- drunk Lucy
- Drunk confessions
- Married Couple
- Twitter Prompt
- dancing at wedding
- Dancing at others wedding
- and then at their own
- Chris is just there
- Tim Bradford Has Feelings
- Lucy misses him
- good thing he has his own office
- Redo of 5x16
- sad Lucy Chen
- Emmett comes back
- Tim gets hurt
- Canon Divergent
- Sexual Tension
- mention of Caleb Wright - Freeform
- mention of Rosalind Dyer - Freeform
- alludes to DOD
- Secret dating
- angela knows but she is also nosey
- Morning After
- after 5x12
- after glow
- Both in their feelings
- first time sleeping together
- alludes to 5x01
- tim has questions
- Lucy is tired
- silly fluff
- Communication
- Moving in Together
- oblivious Chenford
- Alludes to 5x12
- Jealous Tim Bradford
- this one got away from me
- SO FLUFFY
- Rainy Sunday
- so in love
- Chenford In Love
- post 5x10
- First Date
- what if
- Aaron messes up
- Tim is not next to Lucy
- No MCD
- Tim panics
- he asks a question at the end
- lucy comforts him
- Sad Tim Bradford
- Happy Tim Bradford
- a lot of emotions in this one
- Tumblr Ask Box Fic
- alternate for 5x16
- fighting Chenford
- Mention of Child Abuse
- Mention of gunshot wounds
- mention of the military
- Insecure Tim Bradford
- this is soft
- Chenford is not perfect in this
- takes place s4
- ashley is not nice in this
- manipulative
- Love Letters
- Not Actually Unrequited Love
- happiness
- Ashley is controlling
- Tim is not happy
- Happy Chenford
- post 5x22
- Sweetness
- based on the fake proposal
- some smut
- hitting milestones
- Fluffy
- work husband
- Tim is not amused
- annoyed Lucy Chen
- annoyed Tim Bradford
- don’t mess with Tim’s girl
- a gift
- New Year’s Eve party
- chris is a whiny ass
- worried Lucy Chen
- Secret Dating Era
- Fluffy Ending
- 5x09 canon divergent
- a what if
- Chris is clueless
- fluff at the end
- Spoilers for 6x02
- Medium Angst
- NGL prompts
- Kind of angry sex
- Rated M
- Based on 6x01
- based on 6x02
- Spoilers
- twitter prompts
- based on 601
- Lucy POV
- Anxiety
- Panic Attacks
- Fun
- Tim is a bug killer but he’s cute
- And he does it for love
- Chenford is a romcom couple
- mention Jackson West
- secret relationship era
- Ashley is an idiot
- trashing Ashley
- mention of Ashley McGrady - Freeform
- Mention Of 4x09
- jealous Lucy Chen
- Sick fic!
- Caring Tim Bradford
- Tim is stubborn
- post 606 ish
- No Angst
- Pregnancy Scare
- Post Break Up
- Chenford makeup
- lots of F bombs
- Seasons 1-5
- Twitter and tumblr prompts
- post breakup
- Tim goes to therapy
- Supportive Lucy Chen
- Jake Butler comes back
- lucy has nightmares
- Feelings Realization
- AU s5
- CHENFORD COMMUNICATES
- Small Doses
- Post 610
- patient Lucy Chen
- patient Tim Bradford
- hopeful happy ending
- Celina shows up for a minute
- season 5 of The Rookie
- AU
- Lucy Chen has a crush on Tim Bradford
- Angela is sly
- Hurt and comfort
- post 6x10
- small doses era
- Fluff and Hurt/Comfort
- Pining Tim Bradford
- Competitive Chenford
- Chris Sanford is an idiot
- amused Lucy Chen
- Undercover Lucy Chen
- Sex
- Incorrect rookie tweet
- Drunk Lucy Chen
- Tim Bradford Loves Lucy Chen
- Lucy Chen Loves Tim Bradford
- AU 5x01
- real conversations
- Undercover Tim Bradford
- This Is A Little Messy
- But it ends happy
- Locker Room Hookup
- Soft Ending
- Vulnerable Tim Bradford
- Vulnerable Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- 5+1 Things
- between 517 and 518 and beyond
- ngl prompt
- Getting Back Together
- My home is your home
- Tired Lucy Chen
- in love Tim Bradford
- Sleep Deprivation
- Tim Bradford Comforts Lucy Chen
- First Time
- Flirting
- Fade to Black
- horny idiots in love
- Song: Paper Rings (Taylor Swift)
- mention of the hammer
- The Rookie (2018) Season 7
- The Rookie (2018) Season 5
- Season 5 AU
- Misogyny
- Police Sergeant Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- rated T
- Sexism
- abuse of the job
- Supportive Tim Bradford
- Lovesick Tim Bradford
- Found Family
- Title from a Taylor Swift Song
- Angry Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Post 7x06
- Alternate Ending
- Pregnant Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- parents to be
- Unexpected Pregnancy
- Soft Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen in Love
- getting caught
- down bad
- Based on a Taylor Swift Song
- Getting Together
- crashing a wedding
- Declarations Of Love
- Happy Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Happy Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Miscarriage
- baby loss
- Sad with a Happy Ending
- Blood
- References to Depression
- Married Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Not Happy
- Tim Bradford is Soft for Lucy Chen
- Hopeful Ending
- mention of miscarriage
- mention of baby loss
- Scared Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- Kinktober 2025
- Strip Tease
- Strip Poker
- Funny
- Confused Miles Penn
- Crack Fic
- Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen are Idiots in Love
- exasperated Tim Bradford
- The Rookie (2018) Season 8 Speculation
- Fix It
- Tooth-Rotting Fluff
- So Married
- Their Love Is So
- under 1000 words
- Miscommunication
- Tim Bradford and Lucy Chen Talk
- Tim Bradford and Lucy Chen Being Idiots
- Fluffy and feels
- Feels
- True Love
- Horny Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Parallels
- Tim Bradford and Lucy Chen Use Their Words
- Trust
- Celina Juarez Ships Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Celina Juarez Ships It
- Jealous Lucy Chen (The Rookie)
- newlyweds
- Happy
- cryptic pregnancy
- Good Parent Tim Bradford
- Family Feels
- Happy Beginnings
- Forgiveness
- Mistakes
- Angst and Humor
- The Rookie (2018) Season 8
- Soft Tim Bradford/Lucy Chen
- Rants
- Emotional Roller Coaster
- Dreams and Nightmares
- The Rookie (2018) Season 3
- The Rookie (2018) Season 4
- The Rookie (2018) Season 6
- Episode: s03e14 Threshold (The Rookie)
- Episode: s04e18 Backstabbers (The Rookie)
- Episode: s05e10 The List (The Rookie)
- Episode: s06e02 The Hammer (The Rookie)
- Episode: s07e06 The Gala (The Rookie)
- Pre-Canon
- Short & Sweet
- The Rookie (2018) Season 9
- Romantic Fluff
- Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence
- The Rookie (2018) Season 9 Speculation
- rehearsal dinner
- Weddings
- Bad Parents
- good parents
- Tim Bradford is in Love
- Lucy Chen Comforts Tim Bradford
- Emotional
- Drama & Romance
- PTSD
- Banter
- Ghost Jackson West
- Background Jackson West
- RIP Jackson West
- Guilt
- Misunderstandings
- 5 Times
- Planning Adventures
- Phone Sex
Summary
Chenford Prompts + Taylor Swift Lyrics
- Words:
- 466,802
- Works:
- 216
- Bookmarks:
- 133
Bookmarked by Rookie27
12 Aug 2023