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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Rozanov: i added hollander

    or, Shane's experience in the Ottawa Centaurs group chat. He learns quickly that it is nothing like Montreal.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,307
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    857
    Kudos:
    5,210
    Bookmarks:
    1,196
    Hits:
    112,180

    19 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Nothing feels right or good. Not the weight of his pads or the glide of his skates over fresh ice. Not the crispness of the rink air or the roar of a sold out Montreal crowd. Not his teammates’ triumphant shouts when he sinks a goal or cool water in his throat after a hard workout or well wishing texts from his parents before every game. It’s all just… faded.

    Grey.

    Empty.

    Shane doesn’t know how to bring color back into his life. Not when he leeched it out himself with every step he took away from the only person who has ever truly, honestly seen him.

    • • • • •

    After Shane walks away, his life falls apart one piece at a time.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    65,368
    Chapters:
    15/25
    Comments:
    1,315
    Kudos:
    3,500
    Bookmarks:
    1,331
    Hits:
    105,775

    19 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane tries to remember, peering into the darkness surrounding the car with a furrowed brow. It hurts to move, and he feels something warm and slick sliding down his cheek.

    More blood, his mind supplies rather unhelpfully.

    He was driving after dark, but he shouldn’t have been. He wasn’t supposed to be. They had all night together, so why is he here?

    I already chose you, Hollander.

    Shane inhales sharply as his mind slowly fills in the gaps in his memory. They fought. Ilya told him to leave. Shane did.

    And then he crashed.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,913
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    264
    Kudos:
    10,768
    Bookmarks:
    2,027
    Hits:
    107,410

    19 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    It seems silly to ever, ever be sad when this is his life.

    Yet, the brilliant sunlight today seems to be tinged with a gray tone he can’t blink away. A filter over his eyes, over his heart, making his limbs feel like lead. Fear, palpable and boiling in his stomach. He has everything he ever wanted, and what if- god what if he lost it?

    Thoughts of his mother, too. The beautiful, funny, brilliant woman who used to comb his messy curls and call him her little angel whenever she spoke to him. The woman who soothed his aches when he was hurt, who brushed the harsh words of his father right out of his ears with her own gentle ones.

    He gets why she left. He doesn’t blame her, not really. Sometimes, he thinks he might really understand it. Days like today, he thinks, which is a bit scary.

     

    -ilya has a bad mental health day on a babymoon trip to the cottage with shane and their daughter. his family is there for him-

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,778
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    33
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    669
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    143
    Hits:
    6,578

    19 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    [Today]

    So, yeah. That’s how it started.
    Rozanov gave Hayden a pale pink leaflet and told him that his best friend offered Hayden a free prostate massage.
    And Hayden accepted it.
    Technically, it’s his own fault, but Rozanov really is the best scapegoat in the world.

    Hayden thinks if Rozanov knew about all of this, he’d blame himself, too.

    or: Cliff Marleau is a masseur who offers tantric massages and Hayden gets a sample... of fucking course it spirals out of control.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    64,467
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    292
    Kudos:
    694
    Bookmarks:
    188
    Hits:
    13,573

    18 Jul 2026