Pastelion
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The Intern by NailPolisher
Fandoms: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
He used to be honestly excited for being in the Star Wars universe. It’s the Galaxy Far Far Away! Of course he was excited. He gets to be an alien? Great! He loves being colorful and weird looking. He gets to live in Coruscant? Amazing! Public transportation and great food. He’s a tragic orphan? That just means he’s main character baby!
But he doesn’t get any magic powers. He doesn’t get a lightsaber. He can’t afford a ship or the piloting classes, so he can’t even be a smuggler. And he’s a soft man. He can’t fight. Even becoming a bounty hunter is out.
And it’s the fucking clone wars? Are you kidding. He legit didn’t know it was the Prequel Era, Chancellor and Emperor are synonyms, he didn’t question Palpatine’s new title. He literally never interacted with a Jedi. And he doubts he even heard of them in casual conversations until he started collage.
But he can still be like Leia right? Politics it is. He goes for it. And before he knows it, all he ends up with is rent due notices from three months ago, a lot student debt and no friends. So he just repeated his entire first part of his life? Just with a new color grading and different genre background?
No. Nope. Time to get creative about it.
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Ever wake up surrounded by dead people and no idea where you are? Pretty sure I didn't even drink or get hit by a truck last night, either. [A madhouse Self-Insert Sasuke story]
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 310,651
- Chapters:
- 31/?
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 420
- Kudos:
- 1,982
- Bookmarks:
- 826
- Hits:
- 91,990
Bookmarked by Pastelion
01 Jun 2026
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A dead man bound to a chair, his guts spilled into his lap. An Innocence running in the rain, her silver hair stuck to her skull. A spy, his wife, her ex and his partner.
SHIVERS: SHE'S COMING BACK.
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Meredith Dacus has been told her whole life she's going to end up just like her father, Tom Moss, a.k.a. Acidbath. When she gets powers, her worst fears are confirmed, cursing her with a deadly and disgusting power. Joining the Wards was meant to help keep her out of trouble - instead, it sets her on a path towards some of the most dangerous people on the planet.
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Summary
You thought I was above it all, but you'd be wrong! What the hell would happen if I somehow, somewhy landed in Brockton Bay? Well...I guess the universe decided to let me figure it out myself. Waking in a strange house, in a strange body, was concerning, but what did it matter? All of this had to be a dream.
Right?
Series
- Part 1 of ASSIF