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Astarion Ancunín is Hollyweald's most talented disaster—an actor whose scandals are legendary and whose ego is even bigger. When his latest meltdown threatens to end his career, his agent presents a solution: fake date Baldur's Gate sweetheart to rehabilitate his image.
What starts as a competitive game of public affection becomes something neither expected. Between red carpets and late-night diners, Oscar ceremonies and midnight confessions, two people who've forgotten how to be real discover that the best performances happen when you stop acting.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 147,805
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 315
- Kudos:
- 208
- Bookmarks:
- 45
- Hits:
- 5,163
Bookmarked by FaveBricky
08 Mar 2026
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Essentially just following the plot of the game and romance with Astarion with a few personal tweaks. Astarion feels the sun on his face for the first time in 200 years and has to befriend some of the strangest people he's ever met in order to survive. He meets Masmalta (The named female tiefling TAV), and sets about earning her trust the best way he knows how: By lying. He refuses to get attached.. even if she is nice.. even if she drew him a portrait..
Masmalta finds Astarion first when falling out of the Nautaloid. She only has one goal: To get back to her baby brother, who she is the primary caregiver for. And she finds herself becoming attached to some of the weirdest individuals she has ever met.
Series
- Part 2 of The Tiefling & The Vampire
Bookmarked by FaveBricky
08 Mar 2026
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The one in which a father losing his mind is the best and worst thing that could happen to a boy.
Bookmarked by FaveBricky
27 Sep 2025
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Harry Potter was the Chosen One, and Neville Longbottom was the boy no one chose. Then Neville defied Voldemort, killed Nagini, and took down Greyback. Neville came out of the war different: You won’t get a rise out of him but you will get a reaction.
After a tumultuous trauma bond with Luna Lovegood and a failed engagement to Hannah Abbott, Neville has sworn off relationships—only to be paired with Pansy Parkinson under the Reconciliation Act. Neville’s running a nursery, guest lecturing in the Hogwarts Herbology Department, and hunting down Death Eaters with Seamus Finnigan, Alicia Spinnet, George Weasley, and the mercenaries Bill Weasley befriended while raiding tombs for Gringotts. He doesn’t need a Slytherin wife whose best mates are Draco Malfoy and Theodore Nott. Or does he? When he and Pansy prove extremely sexually compatible, Neville must confront his own questions about love, trust, and vulnerability—just as the revival of blood supremacy and a renewed veneration of Bellatrix have strange new bedfellows seeking him out.
Featuring sex, violence, and poisonous plants, DIRTY, FLIRTY, AND VINDICTIVE takes place during BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC with flashbacks to Neville’s life between 1998 and 2003.
Series
- Part 2 of THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 172,892
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Comments:
- 5,735
- Kudos:
- 3,985
- Bookmarks:
- 1,271
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- 188,646
Bookmarked by FaveBricky
27 Sep 2025
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Post‑war life was supposed to be easier. Fred Weasley survived — mostly intact — only to find himself stuck in the Ministry’s shiny new “Reproductive Compatibility Programme.” It’s mandatory, humiliating, and comes with questions no stranger should ever ask with a straight face.
All Fred wants is to get through the process with his dignity intact. Instead, he gets the least romantic wedding in Wizarding history, and to a Lestrange, no less.
Bookmarked by FaveBricky
26 Sep 2025
