Chapter Text
imsebastianstan liked your post.
Huh, you sighed exaggeratingly. Took him longer this time. Maybe he was not on his phone but you still felt a pang of disappointment in the pits of your stomach. Locking your phone & throwing your head back, you heard another DING coming from the device in your hand. Whoever it was, you were not in the mood for small talk or any conversation of any sorts. God, you hated yourself when you were like that. A big pile of self-pity, it was ridiculous. Your eyes glanced at the name that was now appearing at the very top of your screen. Sebby, it read. With that stupid emoji. His favorite one, he told you ages ago. Your heart swelled. Breathing was a task you had unlearned in the blink of an eye. Vision blurry, you carefully placed your phone down. The shaking of your hands was so powerful, it was hard to have a solid grip on it. Of all the different scenarios you had spent nights imagining, this was not one of them. Therefore, you had not rehearsed a reply. Did you think he would maybe comment something? Yes. Call you? Maybe. But texting you seemed to be the only thing you had not considered. The Seb you knew preferred having an actual conversation with actual talking. Text messages could distort the true meaning behind words because one could never quite know how they were meant to sound.
A few moments passed, not because you were too shocked to move (okay, maybe that was part of the reason) but because you needed to calm yourself down enough so you could reply properly. Otherwise you would risk pressing the wrong keys & then you would embarrass yourself &-
Your thoughts were forced to a stop. All of this overthinking would be the death of you someday. Collecting yourself & taking deep & steady breaths, you grabbed your phone once more. The reflection of your distressed form was somewhat hilarious. Or these were the first signs to actually going mad. One of those. Though you had every right to go insane right now. This was a chance that had not been given in forever. If you messed this up, then it might as well be for good this time.
Sebby: hi (y/n), i genuinely hope i’m not wrong about your ig post but if you mean what i think you mean then please let me know. i’m not expecting a reply. god knows i don’t deserve one…
(Y/N): depends on what you’re thinking
Sebby: when’s your plane arriving?
(Y/N): 6am your time
Sebby: noted.
(Y/N): what does that mean?
Sebby: whatever you want it to mean. i’m no longer trying to ruin your life. tell me to leave you alone & i will, i promise.
(Y/N): what if i never wanted you to leave me alone?
Sebby: then it’s 6am
(Y/N): i’m scared
Sebby: i’ll try my very best to never put you in such a situation again. but i can’t go on like this.
Some would have said that leaving him on read was cruel. But you were too overwhelmed & too much of a mess to reply anymore. Confusion mixed with heartache equaled a whole lot of tears. While it was nice to have some sign of life from him, the messages still sounded oddly cold to you. It was something you could not describe but the words, from both his & your side, were not filled with as much kindness & love any longer. Or you misinterpreted things. This was the thing with messaging back & forth. If you could not hear the other one’s voice or watch the other one’s body language then how in the hell were you supposed to trace the hidden emotions behind written words?
Eyes red & puffy, mind all over the place. At least, you figured, you could put some effort into your clothing choice. Fishing to the bottom of your suitcase, you pulled a pretty, flowing dress out. It was a piece that always made you feel like a queen. Decisions were made & you put it on. The mirror in front of you somehow highlighted the tiredness coming from your eyes & not the way the dress hugged you in all the right places. Sunglasses then. Airports were usually overflown with people so better to come prepared than to appear like you just had the worst night of your entire existence.
The flight was relatively silent. Minor turbulences, but you went through them quickly. Attempts to drown the racing thoughts with the help of your trustworthy headphones & your best playlist failed tragically. God, you could be such a sad person, it was frustrating. Besides your short text interaction, there was not another word from either side of you. So what if you were getting your hopes up over nothing? But wait a minute…What were you even expecting him to do? Pick you up from the airport & continue on like nothing had ever happened between the two of you? Maybe he could do that but you? No, as much as you hated to admit it, you had a tough time letting the past die. On the other hand, though, you were so tired of all the arguing & ignoring that you genuinely considered just moving on. If he showed up, that was. Would he? Or would he break you once more, just like all those times before? Only the future could tell. And for once you begged the universe for something good to happen to you. There had been so much pain & hurt lately, you needed a pick me up more than anything else. Seb could be your pick me up. You wanted him to be.
*
Today was a fairytale
You were the prince
I used to be a damsel in distress
You took me by the hand and you picked me up at six
Today was a fairytale
*
6am sharp, you landed. It was as if your body was following a routine you had never before followed but you went with it anyway. The people around you were pushing to get out as quick as possible & you were this close to scream at the top of your lungs. Time was ticking by & it dragged along until you could no longer tell how late it actually was. But you had one goal in mind. To see for yourself if he was here. For you. Mackie had been right, all this dancing around your feelings was childish & strenuous. So for once in your life, you did not focus on your past but on the current moment. Excitement filled you when you remembered that you & Seb would see each other again. All of your doubts were buried deep within for now. Your overthinking often led to awful anxiety which, in addition to that, led you to missing more chances than you could count. Back straight, head held high, you strutted along the vast airport. You had been here multiple times before so you knew where to go. Frankly, you also knew where Seb would wait for you. If he waited for you. But why the hell would he not? It was him who reached out first, after all. It was him who initiated this entire thing. He had to be here.
Crowds were bustling through the huge building. Some hugging after a seemingly long time gone, others shedding tears before a possible departure. So much joy & sorrow all at one place. You wondered which group you would count yourself to today. An extra group if you very unlucky which you prayed you would not be.
Was it cliché when time quite literally stopped when you met with a pair of eyes that were home to you? Such romance movies always occurred ludicrous to you. Right this instant, though, fate seemed to convince you of the contrary. There he was, as beautiful as ever &, most importantly, real. Mere feet away from you, staring at your form, eyeing you up & down from afar. Neither of you took a step forward. All of this resembled more a dream. One of the good kinds. Your eyes were exposed to him, you got rid of those stupid sunglasses during your flight. So what if you looked like hell? There were other, more prominent problems you had to face.
People around you disappeared, it was just the two of you, completely alone. Fighting the urge to run up to him & have him close was almost unbearable. Taking in his face, you hoped you were not misinterpreting his intentions because if you were you would hop on the next plane available & get the hell out of here. Your legs moved on their own. Until then, you had no idea that you were capable of sprinting as fast as you did.
*
Today was a fairytale
*
Sparks erupted around you as you flung yourself at Seb like your life depended on it. Quite frankly, it somehow did. For a short moment, everything fell right into place. Having him wrap his arms around your waist, his face pressed in the crook of your neck. Yes, this was heaven, you were certain. Tears, after holding them in for unknown reasons, made their path down your cheeks.
“I’m sor-“ he started but was cut off by your cracking voice.
“Don’t.” you mumbled tiredly, voice barely noticeable if it were not for his face being pressed next to yours. “Not right now. Let’s just…have this moment.”
And he did not dare to disagree with you. Not when you were right in his presence again.
Maybe you stood there for 10 minutes, maybe it was just a short amount of time. Whatever it turned out to be, you were certain that it felt heavenly. The two of you departed & immediately, you lacked the warmth that Seb’s body radiated when he was touching you. Still, you were at arms-length with his hands delicately touching your elbows, too afraid you let you go entirely. Because what if you disappeared right in front of him & he lost you once again?
The only time you had ever seen him cry was for his job, when he was acting & portraying a role. But right now, as he was in front of you, you noticed how tears silently rolled down his reddened cheeks. The emotion he emitted was filled with hurt & it demonstrated that, whatever had been going on between you, had not left him completely cold. Your hands moved instinctively & reached to his face. Thumbs wiped away his tears tenderly. He let out a cracked chuckle at your action which you could not help but mimic.
“You…You look amazing.” he managed to form a coherent sentence without his words getting stuck in his throat. All you could do in reply was shaking your head, not believing a single word he said. After all, you were aware that your appearance was everything but pretty, considering that you had spent the majority of your last few weeks & months crying & feeling sorry for yourself. And yet it felt nice to hear this specific phrase rolling off his lips. “It’s true.” he emphasized as he held your chin in between his thumb & index finger, lifting your head so you had no other choice but to lock your gaze with his. The sincerity in his eyes brought on a new wave of tears that you had no energy to hold in. While it was not much, Seb appreciated the small, barely there, smile that started to form on your lips.
*
Today was a fairytale
I wore a dress
You wore a dark grey t-shirt
You told me I was pretty when I looked like a mess
Today was a fairytale
*
There was an awkward silence threatening to arise & neither of you knew how to prevent it from happening. That was until Seb made the first step & let his left hand wander down to yours, hinting that he wanted to intertwine his fingers with yours. You hesitated in the slightest, not fully sure whether or not you should risk going down that path. But before the overthinking could take over, you grasped his hand without intending to ever let go again. You noticed how his eyes flicked down to where you touched, following by an intense look at you & a short, definite nod. A pull from his side made you start moving, trailing a bit behind him to give him the control. Wherever he went, you would be right there with him. Time around you stopped to still. In reality, everything moved at the same pace but your consciousness allowed you to truly feel whatever your body was going through which turned time into an infinite span. Deep down, you were glad it did. It just made you all the more aware of what you were doing & if you were doing the right thing.
*
Time slows down
Whenever you're around
*
The airport had been exited a few minutes ago & slowly but surely you began to doubt where this was headed. You were used to keeping your concerns to yourself but something about this situation, about being here with him, gave you a boost of confidence. Fleetingly, you eased your grip on his hand & came to a full stop. Not even a second went by before the man in front of you turned around, tilting his head in confusion. His thoughts were running miles in those short moments. What if you had changed your mind?
“Where are we going?” you pressed, waiting for further explanations from his side. His bewilderment became dawning realization once he located the genuine discomfort in your body language. Your arms were in the process of hugging yourself, making you seem smaller than you actually were. Deep down, the tiny voice in your head told you to disappear.
“I-“ he stopped himself before his words had the chance to come out wrong. After giving himself time to collect his thoughts, he tried once more. “My car is parked a few blocks down. I wasn’t sure how many people would be there in the morning & wanted to avoid press as much as possible.”
“Oh.” ashamed, you glanced at your shoes. Now you felt ridiculous. That was exactly what happened when you ran around, assuming the worst from everyone. Even the people who you knew like the back of your hand a while ago. “I’m sorr-“
“No, please don’t apologize.” Seb interrupted you & kept going when he saw that you opened your mouth to add something, most likely to disagree with him if he remembered you correctly. “And no…you aren’t stupid. I could’ve just told you. Communicating & all that.” his hands gestured to bring his point across & you smiled a little at his childish behavior. It was something that you had missed dearly & experiencing it again was like visiting the town you grew up in. Silence was surrounding you & it was only then when you realized that he had been staring at you, waiting for you to make the next move. Because, as he told you, he did not want to make you any more uncomfortable than you already (possibly) were.
Moving past him, you shot him a glance over your shoulder, signaling that you were waiting for him. He did not want to waste any more time so he followed up & you started walking next to each other. Close enough that you could definitely feel his warmth but not as close as touching. Even from across the street, you could spot his beloved car. You had spent hours & memorable road trips in this vehicle & anticipated riding in the passenger’s seat again.
The familiar sound of Seb unlocking his car filled your ears & you were about to open the door before hands gripped your waist & turned you around. His warm body pressing against your front was the perfect contrast to the cold surface of his Jaguar that your back was pressed against. It all happened so suddenly, but you did not dare pushing him way when his lips welcomed you right home. It was months of built up tension & desperation that went into the kiss. Of all the times you had daydreamed about this exact scene happening, not in your wildest dreams could you have been prepared for the rollercoaster of emotions that washed over you all at once. The way he so delicately cupped your cheeks brought you to a high you had not been on in forever. You just hoped that you sparked the same within him. All your worries thoroughly subsided after you pulled apart & saw a glint in his eyes & a smile on his face that was convincing enough.
“I’ve wanted to do that for a while.” Seb whispered, lips brushing over yours with every word he said.
“Oh, is that so?” you playfully teased, letting your eyelashes do their magic.
“Mhm.” he nodded with a small smirk. “Shouldn’t have waited so long.”
“I agree.” you leaned back to have a clear look at his face. “You could’ve saved us a lot of trouble…& pain.” you mumbled the last part, almost inaudibly but not quiet enough for him to not hear it loud & feel the echoing of its meaning.
“I’m sorry I put you through this.” he sighed, furrowing his eyebrows & mentally slapping himself for being the dumbass that he was.
“It’s fine.” you assured but as you were speaking, you knew as much as he did that it was nothing but a lie.
“I’ll spend all of our following days making it up to you. No matter what, I’ll keep fighting for this. I need you to know that.” his eyes searched yours & only when they locked did you answer.
“Okay.” the word that willed to put your trust in him. Another appreciative smile from his side & he opened the door, helping you in. He did not know how nice that was but you did. Hopefully, you thought, the squeeze of your hand expressed your genuine gratitude.
*
Can you feel this magic in the air?
It must have been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standing there
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
*
There were no other words shared throughout the ride. The only background noise that played quietly was a random radio station blasting whatever people listened to nowadays. Truthfully, you could not have cared less at the moment. Because your focus was not on the song but on the man sitting next to you, carrying the car with a lightness that made you weak at the knees. As his head moved to look at you, he chuckled slightly.
“What?” you snapped out of your trance, raising your eyebrows & waiting for Seb to elaborate.
“You’re staring.” he stated & you huffed out a laugh of disbelieve. Though you did not even try to deny it. Your silence spoke volumes of its own.
“You’re making things up.” you commented with a sarcastic undertone.
“Sure.” he dragged it out, throwing his head back a little before fully focusing on the road ahead again. Seb could not hide his growing smile & you could have sworn that this was the most beautiful sight you had ever witnessed.
*
Today was a fairytale
You've got a smile
That takes me to another planet
Every move you make everything you say is right
Today was a fairytale
*
Your body found its way through his apartment like you had not ever spent a second away from it. The familiarity was a welcoming feeling that made you believe you were right at home. Your hands brushed over the broken spines that were lined up on his bookshelf. Another thing you had missed deeply was reading in complete silence, stealing glances over the ends of your books, smiling sheepishly whenever your gazes met. The memory made you smile lovingly. Seb had his eyes on you from across the room. Watching you dance through his apartment was something he had done multiple times but never before had he truly seen & appreciated the way you moved. So carelessly, almost as if you were floating. How had he ever let you go? How had he ever thought settling for someone else would fulfill his dreams? This time, it was you who caught him staring & you called him out with the slightest hint of a flirtatious tone. It really could have been that easy all along. The two of you could have lived your happiness if you just had admitted to yourself, & each other, that there was more than mere friendship. Because watching this unfold showed you how much you relied on one another. How much you needed the other one in your life to be the person that you wanted to be. If only you had not wasted so many possible memories…
*
Today was a fairytale
All that I can say
Is now it's getting so much clearer
Nothing made sense 'til the time I saw your face
Today was a fairytale
*
Strong arms circled around your waist, pulling you to an equally muscular chest. Enveloped in his embrace was as if you finally achieved the goal you had been working so hard towards. And it felt even better than you would imagine. His head nestled in the crook of your neck, his beard tickling your sensitive skin. Even though you could not see his face, you definitely made out that he was grinning like crazy. As were you. You two knew that this was only the start & you had a bunch of trauma to work through but currently, you simply wanted to enjoy some quiet moments with someone who completed you in the best way possible. All the bad things could be pushed aside for now. Together, you walked over to the door that led you to Seb’s bedroom. On the way there, he slowly started kissing your neck. Pressing a few gentle ones here & there. Your back hit the mattress & his body followed closely behind. His lips met yours & again, those butterflies reemerged, your stomach doing flips that you could not quite describe. But you knew you never ever wanted this to stop.
*
Time slows down
Whenever you're around, yeah
*
A knock rudely interrupted Seb & you so you unwillingly parted before any of this could turn embarrassing. Your body flinched when you heard the front door opening right after. You shot him an unsure look but his gaze was fixed forward.
“Hey Sebastian, where are you, man? I brought the script we were talking about a few da-…Oh.” Mackie came to a halt in the doorway of the bedroom. While there was a good amount of distance between you two, even a blind person could tell what was going on here. “I’m interrupting something, aren’t I?”
“You think?” Seb answered, bringing one hand up to rub his eyes. Even if you wanted to explain yourself, your mouth did not comply so you simply sat there in silence, waiting for the two men to start up the conversation.
“Hey, hey, hey! I’m not complaining!” Mackie put his hands up in defense, smirking as he switched his eyes between your awkward figure & Seb’s more relaxed one. “Good to see you again, (Y/N). How was your flight?”
“Um.” you got stuck on your words but after clearing your throat you managed to croak something out. “Alright, I guess…”
“So are you two…” he motioned between you. “Like, cool again?”
“We’re taking things slow.” Seb nodded & you valued his efforts of not erasing what had happened but rather leaving space for it to be addressed in the near future.
*
But can you feel this magic in the air?
It must have been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standing there
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
*
“I don’t knooooow.” you whined exaggeratingly & threw your head back on the cushion of Seb’s couch. He laughed when he walked over, putting two steaming cups of coffee on the small table. Looking over, you noticed that he chose your favorite mug & you were sure that he made yours just the way you loved it. He knew you well enough & had prepared your drinks more often than you, it seemed.
“Let me see.” he gestured to your hand & you extended your arm to pass your phone over to him. “Looks good to me, what’s bothering you?”
“Yeah?” you asked, rather unsure of his support. “You don’t think it’s too…”hey, we’re starring in a Christmas rom-com.”?”
“Would that be so wrong?”
“No, but cheesy nevertheless.”
“So?”
“So? Sebby, this is serious business.” you kept complaining & definitely testing his patience. But he did not let it get to him.
“It’s really not that serious if you think about it.” he playfully rolled his eyes before nudging you with his elbow. That snapped you out of your thoughts.
“Or we just wait until the award show next week?” you suggested & watched his reaction closely. But there was not a single doubt on his features, he was fully supportive, whatever you were more comfortable with.
“Okay, let’s do that then.” he gave you a reassuring smile & kissed your forehead before you ended up resting your head on his chest. His heartbeat lulling you to a much needed rest.
Whether you made your relationship official through Instagram or at an event did not matter. What did matter, though, was being happy with whatever decision you went with. And a picture seemed very unlike the two of you.
*
Time slows down
Whenever you're around
I can feel my heart
It's beating in my chest
Did you feel it?
I can't put this down
*
The last time Seb & you were walking a red carpet was when you were still very much fighting & there was another girl at his side. That night changed everything for you. Seb broke up with his wonderful date & you realized how important he still was to you. Even after all the painful nights, all the tears & everything.
But now, sticking right by his side, having his arm around you, you were no longer nervous or anxious. Cameras flashed, not getting enough of the talk of the event. All headlines would contain your names tomorrow morning & your pictures were already making their way through social media as you were walking past interviewers. For some you stopped, answering a couple of questions which were mostly about your relationship. Or better said, confirmation on your relationship. You expected this to happen. And you did not mind it. You thought you would but you found that, with having this man by your side, there was nothing you could not do & nothing you could not handle. So the cameras followed you everywhere & despite it all, you had the best night imaginable, surrounded by tons of talented people, some of them including friends & co-workers.
*
But can you feel this magic in the air?
It must have been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standing there
It must have been the way
*
So this was it. Looking back, seeing how far you had come, you could barely believe how you started out in the first place. How silent cravings turned into severe heartbreak. How the pain changed you, for the better & the worst. How this hell-like journey gave you everything you had ever asked for. And this everything was sitting right next to you, head buried deep in another book as one of his hands lazily drew circles over your knee, your legs comfortably spread out over his lap.
How you would describe this story? Well, it was not necessarily easy to put a label on it. Maybe just as it was.
Your very own & personal fairytale. With all the ugly & all the pretty & everything in between.
*
But can you feel this magic in the air?
It must have been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standing there
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
It must have been the way
Today was a fairytale
*
Today was a fairytale
*
THE END.