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It's already a routine to her,but she can't help her heart from beating faster.
Abigail brushes her hair,carefully untangling all the little knots,eyes fixed on the mirror but not quite watching.It hurts to know she's hunting for others like her,when she know she was the prey,always.She was the original sin.
She lets it fall against her shoulders,dark and heavy,maybe just to mask her scar a little more.The mark of her father does not leave her,but she thinks it better that way,better to bear his sign upon her skin,like a warning to any that might come close.
Her mind does not bear any scars,but it harbors the thoughts of her father.She replays the memory of him in his cabin,his voice smooth, whispering instructions as he sets the knife in her hands and she listens.She has to,or she'll ruin them.And then,what is the point?
She puts her make up on,bright red lipstick and dark eyeshadow. It makes her pop,her mother used to say.
She puts her clothes on.Alana chose them for her,as if a piece of cloth could help to fix her up.You can't stick a broken glass in glue and hope it'll stay together.She appreciates the thought,though.They change her up,make her stick out,make her normal.She grabs her heels and hopes she'll find someone to settle her mind.
~~
The bar is crowded,men and women tangled together in conversations,the light chatter almost overshadowing the booming music,but Abigail doesn't mind squeezing between them.She makes her way to one of the chairs and sits,pulling a cigarette from her pocket.She doesn't like smoking per se,but Marissa did,and they shared one from time to time. Plus,she's allowed to be a little poetic,isn't she?
She looks around a little,trying to spot a pretty lady,but there's none that she needs in sight.
"Long dark hair,soft and pretty.Big blue eyes,as bright and alive as the sea itself.Not too tall,not too short,just right."
The bartender makes her way up to her,chatting with all the men gathered around while cleaning a glass,but Abigail doesn't notice her until she taps her arm. Abigail gasps,though not because of the contact.Her eyes are blue and her hair is dark,although it curls a little more than is should.Linda,her name tag reads,watches her face smirking.
-Did I scare you?she asks and her voice is sweet and if not a little mischievous,tinged with a southern accent.
-A bit,yeah.Abigail grabs at her earring and looks down,carefully remembering her intentions.
-Well,sorry about that.Anything you wanna have?
-You.
The word escapes her mouth before she can stop it and for a second she thinks she screwed this up,but Linda laughs and shakes her head.Abigail realises she's older than her.
-Wow,aren't you honest?
Abigail bites her lip and doesn't answer.Linda casts a look sideways and makes a sign to the other bartender to keep her place for a couple of minutes.
-Kid,what's your name?
-Abigail.Nice to meet you,Linda.She smiles to cover the nervousness that her surname brings,even when unspoken.
-Nice name.
Abigail swallows around the nod in her throat.
-Say,Abigail,are you busy later?
-No,not really.
-Good. Linda leans forward,motioning her to do the same. 'Cause i wanna fuck you.
A shiver runs down Abigail's spin and she crosses her legs,breathes in.She catches a bit of Linda's perfume, sweet and flowery,before she retracts behind the counter.The woman reaches for a piece of paper and scribbles down something.
-I get off at 12:30. If you ain't going to sleep,come at this address at 1.Come on,kid,make it worth my time.
Abigail takes the paper and folds it,shoves it down in her pocket.Linda licks her lips and takes off to do her job,and the girl can't help but watch her walk away.her cigarette lays forgotten in her hand,the ashes scattering onto the floor.She takes a long breath,then gets up from the chair.
~~
The clock strikes 12:55 before Abigail is at her door.She takes a deep breath in,fixing her clothes, and arranges her hair in the window of a car nearby. Her whole body is tingling,hands seeking skin,lips seeking lips,teeth seeking flesh.
She knocks on the door twice,then pulls the knob and lets herself in.The apartment is a bit small,but there's only a pair of shoes at the entry.Enough space for one.
Linda gets out of the kitchen,wearing different clothes than she did at the bar,and Abigail feels a little lightheaded.She doesn't know how,but she gets closer,almost as if she's floating and unzips her jacket.
-Hey,kid. How you feeling?
-Good,hope it's gonna get better than that.You?
-You know how I feel,otherwise you wouldn't be here.Wanna drink something? Linda asks,but she doesn't seem to mean it,so Abigail doesn't prolong things for no reason.That would be cruel,she learned.
-Nope.
The girl licks her lips and grabs Linda,fingers digging into the soft flesh of her arms,pulls her closer for a kiss.Her lips are chapped but her hands are fast and it's not long before Abigail stands half naked in the bedroom.
They're still kissing and Abigail has to adapt to Linda's weak patience ,her hands roaming the sensitive skin of Abigail stomach,before dropping lower and opening her pants to slither a hand into her panties. The woman plants open kisses on her neck,licking and biting onto her collarbone. Her fingers rub quickly into her clit,twisting and pressing and dipping towards her hole to spread her wide open.
She maneuvers her onto the bed,taking control and climbing above her to suck and caress her breasts with sudden moves,leaving Abigail breathless and wanting.Linda makes quick work of their pants,but she can't help whimpering when her hand returns. She enters her with two fingers,moving them lazily in and out,twisting them just right to make her moan and squirm and grab at the sheets.She arches her back,chanting a string of obscenities and running her hand through the woman's hair.
Linda's mouth finds her nipple and licks circles around it while her hand fiddles with one of her boobs .She wants to close her eyes,wants to forget the world before the storm's coming,but the other presses harder into her,harsh and demanding until she comes,letting the wave of pleasure hit her again and again.Her true hunger rises.
Abigail gets up,twisting her fingers in Linda's hair,imagining how she'd drag her body off the bed and into the kitchen.The corners of her mind go red.The woman lays down the bed,long legs spread and hair tousled in different directions.She looks wild,as if she'd run away from something,her heavy breathing booming into her ears.
The girl imagines chasing her through the woods,like a lion hunting for a deer.She can feel her heart threatening to leave her chest,but she doesn't give up,not when she's just so close.Linda screams but the sound only gets louder as she comes closer.Abigail jumps onto her back,pulls out the rope and-
the girl plants slow kisses onto Linda's nape,running her tongue along her neck,biting and licking slowly down her body.She gets up and grabs her belt while Linda simply looks confused,but she stops to grind her clit onto her thigh as she ties her hands above her head.
In her mind,Abigail counts bruises. Sharp red lines across her torso -she bends down and writes soft apologies into skin with her tongue- decorating her like a present to be kept forever. There should be bleeding cuts onto her stomach,not too many,just enough to make her mouth water.She dreams about sharpening her blades.
She settles between her legs and kisses her way down,lets her fingers twist and play with Linda's clit.She plants soft kisses along her things,imagines taking her knife and digging it into the other's flesh,cutting muscle and skin and only stopping when it grinds on bone.The fresh blood pools at her feet.She puts the meat away.Linda moans and whines,throwing her head back and arching her spine.The moans start screaming pain into her ears.
Abigail bites softly across her stomach,pretending her teeth are steel and cut up patterns of honor into her.She swiftly down lower as she fingers Linda's cunt in shocking waves,hard,running the tip of one along her spot.She spits and takes her clit in her mouth,flicking it,sucking it,kissing it.
She almost feels the hair in her hands as she thinks about brushing it,twisting it into thick braids and cutting in.She could sell it,she considers,but she leaves it like that,grabs a sturdier knife.She raises her head up ,focusing her eyes onto her rib cage,onto splitting it right open in two.She takes the heart in her hand,counts it's beats as they die and rips it
out,bathing herself in blood.The warmth of it welcomes her,enchanting her with the iron smell,protecting her,giving her strength,giving her meaning.
She hears Linda come with a scream and pretends she rips it out of her,one last sign of live.Abigail knows she's wet,so wet, and she touches her own cunt,pumping her fingers hard as images flow through her mind: knife and blood,pale skin,blue eyes dying out,sobs,lungs,bones as white as heaven.She comes so hard she bites on her lip to draw blood and the taste only throws her again over the edge,until she's out of breath and resting her head onto the bed.
She gets up,unties Linda and feels a pang of anger when she hears her voice and feels the pulse underneath her fingers,but she says nothing,just searches for her clothes.Linda gets in the shower,and she's grateful she doesn't have to make excuses about leaving.
~~
It's 3 am when she gets home,but she's still all restless.Her cunt aches and she hears the screams and the steady pump of blood inside her head.Abigail throws herself on the bed and shoves a hand into her panties.And if she stole a hairbrush and a scarf,who could blame her? She likes to honor them,inside her mind.