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Armand practically flies to the bowling alley the second he sees Raglan through Alex’s eyes. Of course, when he walks in, he is cool, calm, and collected in his half bun and long coat. All eyes turn to him; he’s used to that. He uses that, when he needs to. But he knows the feeling he inspires in the agents surrounding Daniel this morning is not attraction or interest or even awe—it’s fear.
Good. He’s feeling deadly today.
“I assume your business with my companion”—he says the last word slowly so that each syllable stands out—“has concluded now that you have your…” he looks down at the bag in disgust, “...head.”
Raglan smiles, predatory as always, his hands clasped in front of him. The Talamasca agent is a lot of things, but he’s no idiot. He knows Armand would tear him limb from limb if he hurt Daniel. Armand is more concerned about Daniel getting hurt trying to prove a point than about Raglan making the wrong call.
Raglan stares at Armand’s mouth hungrily and it disturbs Armand, though he doesn’t show it. A second later, the reason clicks.
He wants to see his fangs.
“I am not Louis,” Armand says flatly. “I do not exist for your entertainment, and I am not interested in your agenda with vampirekind. I suggest if you do not also wish to end up in a bowling bag, you leave. Now.”
Raglan looks at him with sharp eyes that suggest he sees right through him, but he takes a deep breath and looks at his agents nonetheless, whooshing his hands through the air to get them moving like a shepherd to his flock. “Yes, yes, too true, we do have places to be, things to do.” He smirks. “Heads to reattach.” He walks towards the door behind the last agent, and with more confidence than Armand knows he feels, does not look back as he waves. “See you both at the concert.”
The door to the outside world slowly closes, echoing in the empty bowling alley, and then Armand and Daniel are alone.
Daniel’s gaze stays trained on the door. He’s still livid, his fangs not retracted yet. Secretly, Armand is pleased. He loves the chance to see Daniel’s sharp teeth.
When Daniel finally looks back at him, he startles like he’s just realized he isn’t alone. His eyes are less sure, his posture caving in slightly. “Sorry,” he mumbles.
Armand’s brows raise. “For what?”
Daniel shifts his weight. “Uh, losing Lestat’s head?”
Armand waves off the concern with ease. “He was going to be reattached one way or another, and this saves us a trip to the butcher shop.” He walks up to Daniel, getting as close as he dares, and lifts his hand to readjust the collar of his jacket. It’s mindless, something he used to do all the time, and he likes to feel the rise and fall of Daniel’s chest beneath his hand.
But a chill like cold water trickles down his spine and he stops, his hand frozen between them. He has no right to touch Daniel anymore. Daniel may have agreed to let Armand teach him how to walk in the sun, and agreed to this temporary murder, and even—confusingly—wound up as his companion, but he had made it clear that night in the park that he did not love Armand in return, and never would.
Eternity is a long time. Armand wants to have hope. He wants to believe that as the memories return, Daniel will understand that he did love Armand, once. That this bond between them has not arisen out of thin air, but rather was a spectre pulled forth from the past, desperate to live once more.
His hand falls short of Daniel’s jacket, though it’s obvious what he was going to do, and he shoves it back in his own pocket instead. He does not miss the way Daniel’s eyes track the movement.
“How’d you know he was here?” Daniel asks.
“Alex,” Armand answers. “I was monitoring, through him.”
“You’ve been using Boo Radley as a nanny cam?”
Armand can’t tell if it’s more surprise or censure. He swallows hard. “Yes.”
To his relief, Daniel laughs. “That’s ridiculous.” He looks around. “Hey where is he anyway?”
“Making himself scarce. Sleeping in the car outside.”
“How did he get here?”
“The car outside, obviously. I had one of my followers drive him.”
“Windows are still a problem aren’t they?”
“Not in the back of a hearse.”
Daniel looks at Armand for a second, his face frozen on the edge of disbelief, and then he absolutely loses it. He’s bent over roaring with laughter and Armand can’t stop the grin it brings to his own face to see how he can still make his boy happy.
Daniel stands straight and wipes the blood tear from his eye. “Fuck,” he says, the laughter dying down but the smile remaining. “You’re a little crazy, you know that?”
“Yes.”
“But you’re also…um…good.” His hand comes up to the back of his neck as he looks down, blushing hard.
Armand frowns. “I don’t understand.”
Daniel scratches at his head and looks away, squinting at nothing in the distance. “Just, that’s nice that you got him a hearse. I don’t know. Nice that you were watching me too, I guess. You’re kind of creepy sometimes, but it’s…good.”
Armand is pretty sure it’s a compliment, so he tries to take it like one. “You would have handled Raglan beautifully,” he offers in return. “But you are mine and I will protect you.”
At that, Daniel stares, dumbstruck.
Armand shifts uncomfortably. “What is it?”
Daniel blinks rapidly, shaking his head. “Nothing. I—I’ve just never, um, really had someone do that before. I was usually looking out for other people. Or, well”—he scratches his head again—“failing to.” He shrugs. “I wasn’t very good at it, honestly. I should never make a fledgling.” He laughs, but the joke falls flat.
Armand tilts his head, taking in the tiny details of Daniel’s face, trying to see if he can find where the insecurity is hidden in the lines. If he can root it out. “You looked out for me.”
Daniel couldn’t look more surprised if he’d tried. “I did? When?”
“Back then. Back when we were…”
Armand doesn’t say companions. He wants to, but he doesn’t have much right to when he was the one denying Daniel the gift for so long. They’re companions now, but frankly, that surprises Armand as well. More surprising still is that it was Daniel who had decided that. On their way to the crime scene, he’d told Armand how he’d mentioned to Louis and Lestat at dinner that he was seeing someone and they hadn’t questioned it. Hadn’t asked anything at all, apart from why he looked like a lobster.
Armand had wanted to cry—of course Daniel had already found someone more worthy—until Daniel turned and looked at him with a grin and said, “I thought calling you my companion might tip them off. But they’re two of the most self-absorbed people in the world. Probably would’ve been fine.” Armand had hardly known what to say, and then before he knew it, they were at the park.
“...together,” he finishes. “When we were together. You took care of me in many ways.”
Daniel nods slowly, biting his lip, but there’s no recognition in his eyes. “Right. Um…” He glances away. “I’m sorry, I don’t remember that.”
Armand sighs. “It’s all right.” That’s his fault too.
“Will it come back?” Daniel asks.
There’s such vulnerability in his voice that it forces Armand to meet his gaze. “Do you want it to?”
“Yes,” he answers immediately. “I’d like to remember my life. You did promise to give me half of it back.” He gives a weak smile.
Armand chuckles, shoving his hands deeper in his pockets. “I did. It will, I think. Most of it anyway. It may just take time. Perhaps certain things to… shake specific memories loose.”
Daniel furrows his brow. “What does that mean?”
Armand is sure he’s blushing from head to toe. “It makes a sort of logical sense, doesn’t it? That something happening now may help you remember a similar event in the past?” His heart beats uncomfortably fast. “Like bowling.” He nods to the lane. “That is something we used to do. You loved it. Does…does being here help you remember that?”
Daniel thinks for a second. “Not…specifically. Not like I’m getting flashes like of San Francisco. But it feels familiar. I feel comfortable here, and I didn’t really know why.”
Armand nods. “Yes. Perhaps it depends on the memory.”
Daniel takes several steps closer to Armand. Armand’s breaths come short and shallow.
“I’ve got a question for you, Armand.”
God he loves the way Daniel says his name. “Yes?”
“Are you just trying to get in my pants?”
Armand blinks. He barks a startled laugh, so hard that he has to take a step back. Daniel has always had a way of saying what he least expected—he’d missed that—but this was the last thing Armand thought he would say.
“It’s not that funny,” Daniel mumbles, turning red and looking away.
Armand doesn’t think; he just places a hand under Daniel’s chin and gently turns his face back to him.
“Beloved, I am not laughing at you because it is absurd. Believe me, I would greatly enjoy getting in your pants as you say. I just did not expect that.” He smiles, relaxed for the first time all night. “If you thought letting me inside your pants might help you remember things…I would be more than happy to, but I am just happy to be near you again. To teach you to walk in the sun. To spend time with my fledgling.” He says fledgling, but it sounds like love.
Daniel is staring at him, his mouth hanging slightly open.
Armand’s brows knit together. “What?”
“Beloved, huh?”
It’s Armand’s turn to feel the hot wave of humiliation. He hadn’t even realized he’d said that. All these years later, it still felt so natural, especially when he was touching Daniel.
“My apologies.” He takes a step back. “Force of habit. Decades later, but I suppose muscle memory is stronger than I gave it credit for.”
Daniel is still watching him, and Armand understands now what Daniel means when he says Armand watches him like a bug.
“If muscle memory is so strong,” Daniel says slowly, “maybe we should give it a try.”
“Oh,” Armand says, feeling something die inside of him. “Of course. We could do that.”
Daniel laughs uncomfortably, crossing his arms over his chest, and the words are tinged with a self-deprecating sarcasm. “Don’t sound so eager, boss, I might actually think you like me or something.”
Armand tilts his head, feeling lost. “I do like you, Daniel. I thought I made that clear.”
Daniel just looks at him, and Armand feels the urge to squirm under such unrelenting observation.
“Armand…” He says his name so softly, Armand shivers. “I know you’re not used to having people want you without an ulterior motive, so I feel like I need to say this plainly. It’s not about the memories.”
“It’s…not?”
“No.”
Frustration blooms beneath his skin, stretched too tight, and he feels like screaming. He settles for groaning, flapping his arms—hands still in the pockets of his coat—and walking in a short circle until he’s facing Daniel again. He takes a deep breath. As calmly as he can manage, he says, “Then I really don’t understand.”
He’s tired and the extremely long night is weighing on him. Armand doesn’t sleep much, but he wants to now. He wants to lie down in his coffin with Daniel pressed up against him, with anything Daniel will give him, but Daniel is currently confusing him at every turn.
Daniel…also looks mildly concerned.
Wonderful.
Armand watches the Adam’s apple in Daniel’s throat bob.
“Armand…that was me flirting with you.”
That smacks him in the face and he stops all his fidgeting. His amber eyes go wide. “Flirting with me,” he says as if the words taste bad. “Why?”
The corner of Daniel’s mouth pulls up. For once, Armand is glad he can’t read his mind. He doesn’t want to know what Daniel sees when he looks at him. Not anymore. Not when it used to be filled with love and devotion and now the love of his life, his one and only fledgling, is older and acerbic and Armand cannot offer him anything anymore.
“I have nothing more to give you,” he says quietly, desperately, begging Daniel to understand. “If it would help you remember your life, then that is what I promised to do and I would stand on that. You do not have to–to patronize me.” He scrunches his eyes closed. “I do not want you to flirt with me to achieve your goal. Just ask for what you want and I will give it to you. I would grant your every wish.”
Armand startles when he feels a soft hand cupping his cheek. He opens his eyes to see his own molten orange irises staring back at him.
“I’m not flirting with you to make fun of you,” Daniel says sincerely. “I know I’ve been kind of a dick, but…” He shrugs one shoulder. “I don’t know. Spending time with you lately? Practicing daywalking? Watching you buy things from Amazon on your phone when you think I’m not looking because you know I’d have questions, and I do, Armand, because what the fuck do you need fifty blenders for?” Daniel shakes his head. “But no. That’s…I wouldn’t do that to you.”
His voice is stern, but the ire is not directed at Armand.
“I’m not flirting with you to make fun of you or because I know you have feelings for me. And I’m not doing it to try to get my memories back, either. I’m doing it because I want to. Because despite your batshit craziness, I also kinda can’t look away.”
Daniel has not let go of his face. Armand scarcely breathes, afraid to displace his hand.
“I have nothing to offer,” he says again, voice barely above a whisper.
Daniel tilts his head, eyes tracing each inch of Armand’s face. “Can I kiss you?”
Armand breathes, rapid and shallow. “You’re asking?”
“Yeah,” Daniel says, the gentlest smile Armand has ever seen on his lips. “I’m asking.”
Armand nods once, barely a gesture, but it’s enough. Daniel leans in slowly, giving Armand time to pull away if he changes his mind, but he won’t. He’s been wanting this since Dubai. Since 1985. Maybe since always. He moves the last half inch to meet Daniel’s lips.
The kiss is soft, almost chaste. Daniel doesn’t let go where he holds Armand’s face. He softly caresses the cheekbone beneath his thumb as he pulls back to slot their lips together again. He pulls Armand’s bottom lip between his own with gentle force, but does not ask for more.
When they separate, Armand feels awe and panic in equal parts.
“Don’t leave,” he says. “Please.”
Daniel’s brows draw together and he frowns. “Why would I leave?” He huffs a laugh. “Where would I go?”
“You don’t remember. You may have loved me then, but you don’t remember. You were always angry at me. I would not turn you. You left, all the time. You came back, but you left, and now—you have the gift. You have no reason to turn back.”
I will burn in hell alone.
Daniel doesn’t move back. He just stands there, running his thumb gently over Armand’s skin before moving his hand to the back of Armand’s neck, fingers carding through the hair that hangs down from his bun.
“I remember enough.”
He leans back in and captures Armand’s mouth one more time, and it is bliss.
This kiss is hungrier, more desperate to reclaim something long lost. Daniel’s other hand flies to Armand’s waist and pulls him so their bodies are flush. They kiss so roughly teeth and tongues clash, but they also breathe into each other’s mouths and Armand holds Daniel’s face in both hands like he is something precious.
“Daniel…” he pants as Daniel pulls his shirt from where it’s tucked into his trousers and slips his hands beneath it, against Armand’s back. His touch on Armand’s bare skin feels divine.
Daniel nips at his lip, sucks on it, tastes the inside of Armand’s mouth. His breaths are hot and heavy and he’s hard against Armand’s thigh.
“Daniel, please…”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Oh—” Armand shivers, his eyelids fluttering shut as he presses himself harder against Daniel’s body. “You used…” He tilts his head to give him better access as Daniel moves to kiss down the column of his neck. “You used to call me that.”
“Fuck—” Daniel slides his hand beneath Armand’s thighs and lifts, Armand instinctively jumping into the move. Daniel may not remember it, but Armand does. Armand remembers how Daniel loved to pick him up and move him wherever he wanted him. This time, Daniel carries him to the bench and sits with Armand in his lap.
Armand peppers Daniel’s face with kisses, his hands sinking deep into Daniel’s white curls. “Beloved…” he whispers against his skin. “My beloved…”
Daniel moans, crushing Armand tighter against his chest and rolling his hips beneath him. “God, you’re so fucking pretty.”
Armand has never cared for that compliment. After all, it is no great accomplishment to be beautiful. But when Daniel says it, he doesn’t feel judged for his value, his worth. He feels seen.
“Daniel…” he whispers in prayer. “Please…”
“What do you want, baby?”
“You.” He leans his head back as Daniel’s hands skirt down his sides, fingertips leaving a tingling path of want along his skin. “Just you.”
“I don’t have any lube on me,” Daniel says. “I wasn’t counting on this happening today, here.”
“I don’t care,” Armand says, and he really doesn’t. He needs Daniel even if it burns, even if it hurts, even if it is nothing like he imagined their reunion. Daniel is in his arms again, kissing Armand, wanting Armand, maybe someday capable of loving him. That is all Armand has ever wanted. “Use the blood.”
Daniel reels back and looks at Armand horrified. “No. I’m not gonna hurt you. I’m not—” He swallows hard, seemingly warring with himself. He shakes his head. “I’m sorry for everything you’ve been through that makes you think that’s okay, and I’m sorry if this pisses you off, but I’m not gonna sit here and pretend it’s fine to make you suffer just because you don’t think it matters if you do.”
Armand doesn’t like people talking about his past, not that it comes up much. But with Daniel, it’s different. With Daniel, he hears the…if not love, then at least indignation on Armand’s behalf…in every word.
He smiles and meets Daniel’s eye. “I appreciate your defense of me.”
Daniel shrugs, but he looks away, a pink flush coloring his cheeks. “We’re companions.”
Armand sucks in a breath. “We are…”
Daniel looks back, so unsure. It’s a strange look on such a brash, self-assured man. “Do you…you want that, right? You didn’t just agree to avoid being alone?” He winces, seeming to realize the offense. “Sorry…”
Armand sits up, his knees still bracketing Daniel’s hips, and pulls back to really examine his face. He runs the fingers of one hand across Daniel’s forehead, pushing the hair back and gently rubbing his cheek.
“I understand your question. I am not offended. But no, I did not agree to avoid vampire loneliness. Honestly, I have viewed you as my companion for half a century. Even when you were not in my life, when you did not remember me, when we both went home to others, you were there in my thoughts, in my heart. If you’d have died and a cruel twist of fate forced me to continue to live every day without you with no respite, you would still be the one to carry my soul.”
Daniel’s expression was so open, so broken, his lip wobbling as blood tears glistened in his eyes. He swallowed several times before laughing with disbelief and using the back of his hand to wipe the tears away.
“Fuck, Armand, you can’t just say stuff like that. How am I supposed to live up to it?”
Armand shrugs, an amused grin dancing on his lips. “Daniel…you have been living up to it your whole life. I doubt your death could change it now.”
Daniel laughs. “You know, you’ve come a long way from the guy who thought all fledglings hate their makers.”
Armand did still fear that. “I know how I feel for you and it is unwavering. I hope, in time, you may come to…care for me too. I know there is much still for me to do before I may be worthy of your affections, but if you grant me the time to prove it to you, I promise to be a good and true companion, regardless of the depth of your feelings.”
Daniel was quiet for several moments, and Armand glanced up through his lashes to find him looking at him with more fondness than Armand had seen directed his way since 1985, when a boy lay sprawled in a bed with the ocean breeze coming in through the open doors on an island built for two.
Daniel pushes a lock of Armand’s hair behind his ear. “I think I could love you just like this.”
Armand’s heart beats so fast he thinks it might escape his chest, but he leans into the touch. “Are you certain?”
Daniel smiles. “Yeah.”
He has no words, he can barely feel his body and he might faint, but Armand has the sudden and immovable need to be joined with his companion right now.
He ducks his head to Daniel’s neck, letting his fangs barely graze the skin there, and waits. Daniel shudders beneath his touch, and then subtly presses in to pierce his flesh on Armand’s fangs. The blood hits Armand’s tongue and it’s like a burst of the sweetest fruit he has ever known. He groans and rolls his hips again, relishing Daniel’s sweet little sounds as Armand drinks from him.
His boy, his love, his life. If it were Daniel Molloy, it would not be such a bad life at all.
“Need…need…”
Armand pulls back and looks at Daniel, his gaze crazed and hungry. “What is it, beloved? I cannot read your mind anymore.”
“Please, Armand, need to drink from you.”
“Of course. Of course.” He leans his head to the side and offers up his neck. Daniel latches on, sucking down pull after pull. Armand feels lightheaded and happier in that moment than he could have ever imagined being again.
When they’re both covered in each other’s blood running down their chins, Armand crashes their mouths together again, tasting himself mixed with Daniel. Daniel reaches down between them and undoes his jeans and Armand’s trousers. He maneuvers him just enough that he can free both their cocks, taking them in hand and stroking them together.
“Ah!” Armand shouts, the contact feeling so right after such a long drought. He presses his forehead against Daniel’s, cutting a slice onto his own skin and dripping blood on both their cocks before the wound heals. Daniel groans and strokes them with it, the blood slicking the way.
There’s something impossibly intimate about them being hard and pressed together like this, the friction against each other ratcheting up their desire. Armand can’t keep in the feral, primal noises it wrenches from him.
“Oh, Daniel, my Daniel, anything, anything, anything you want.” He holds Daniel tight as he strokes both of them together and Armand tries to hold on. “Beautiful boy.”
Daniel chokes out something between a sob and a whine. Armand is not ready for it to be over.
“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” Daniel says, his other hand holding Armand around his back. “I’ve got you. Never letting go again.”
Armand grasps Daniel’s shoulders so hard his nails pierce pinpricks in the flesh. “Beloved—oh, Daniel—”
Armand can’t stop it. He could never stop anything with Daniel; he was a force of nature. His orgasm crashes over him and he comes all over Daniel’s fist.
“Oh fuck, Armand—” Daniel stares down at where Armand has spilled, pink-tinged cum mixing with the blood as Daniel strokes faster and Armand whimpers from the sensitivity.
Daniel runs his thumb over the head of Armand’s cock where it is most sensitive, and Armand knows without asking that Daniel remembers this, at least subconsciously, remembers how Armand likes to be touched.
“So good for me. So good,” Daniel whispers, Armand moans, and he finally falls over that edge. “Oh, ah, yes yes yes—” He crushes his mouth to Armand’s as he comes all over them both, the evidence of their desire mixing between them.
For once, Armand doesn’t mind ruining an outfit. It was entirely worth it.
He pulls back and rests his forearms on Daniel’s shoulders, blinking sleepily in the afterglow. “So,” he asks, “did it bring any memories to light?”
When Daniel looks up, Armand sees tears running down his face.
“Daniel?” he asks, alarmed.
Daniel looks at him, lips parted, and Armand cannot read the look on his face. Is it anguish? Betrayal? Sadness?
“If it was not…what you imagined,” he says, grasping at straws, “it need never happen again.” Armand’s mouth goes dry, and he feels like he’s bargaining for something he’s already lost. The hazy high evaporates in the face of Daniel’s regret, Armand’s impending rejection. “Please,” he whispers, “please don’t leave.”
Daniel shakes his head slowly. “No, I—” He cups Armand’s face with such gentle hands that Armand feels a tiny sliver of hope. “I remember loving you,” he says. “Not everything, maybe never everything, but I remember how you looked in the Florida sunshine, how you’d curl up on my chest in that big bed in the room with the French doors so we could see the beach.”
Daniel starts sobbing and it’s so concerning, Armand doesn’t know what to do. He brushes back the hair by Daniel’s ears, making soft shushing noises to calm him. “It’s all right,” he says. “You’re okay.”
Daniel presses the heels of his palms to his eyes. “Fuck. Why does this hurt so much?”
Armand has thought about the answer to that for a long time. “Because it is a tragedy. We should never have been apart.” He cards his fingers through the curls, hoping Daniel hears the sincerity in his words. “I’m sorry.”
Daniel shakes his head. “No, I get why you did what you did. And I’m pissed at Louis for his part in it, but I get why you let me live. And you were right, Armand. I wasn’t ready back then. It would’ve destroyed us.”
Armand feels that familiar flicker of hope again and asks quietly, “And I have not destroyed us? Like this?”
Daniel smiles. “No. You made me.” He presses the softest, most reverent kiss to Armand’s lips. “And we’ll make this. Whatever this is. Together.”
Armand smiles with such fondness and feels a part of his soul healing. “Together,” he agrees. “My beautiful boy…”
Daniel nuzzles Armand’s nose and presses a kiss to his cheek. “All yours, boss.”
Armand pulls him in and kisses him again. He kisses him until he feels better, and then for a while more after that. There’s no rush really. Eternity is a long time, and they’ve got nowhere else to be.
We’ll be in hell together after all, he thinks with a smile.
And for the first time in five hundred years, Armand is not afraid.