Chapter Text
hadowheart was currently in the midst of doing something that she knew she was going to regret later. Lying to the Mother Superior and leaving her authorized zone to go out and talk to a private investigator. It had taken a month for her to get the nerve to do that.
Half of that mouth was spent just going back and forth with it, trying to weigh the risk and consequences against curiosity she’d battled with for most of her life. With the support of her only friend, she steeled herself and went through with her mission. There was only a few times a day she wasn’t monitored, and most of the time was when she wasn’t proselytizing.
Nocturne reassured her that she would make sure she could do this without anyone noticing. Shadowheart believed her, even if she’d had a pit of nausea pooling in her stomach for the past few hours.
She needed to stop second guessing herself, and by extension her best friend as well as her goddess. She prayed to Lady Shar the entire night before, asking for signs that she was doing something wrong. When everything went according to plan, she took that as a sign of her Lady’s approval.
She was at the private investigator’s door.
Vaelyn - a drow that had been getting so much press that even her cloister had seen a few news headlines lately - lived in an apartment that was conveniently far enough away from the cloister that no one would actually see Shadowheart coming to visit. It was, however, close enough that Shadowheart didn’t have to worry about getting back in time before her absence was noticed by more than just Nocturne.
There were two entrances to her office on the ground floor. One that was easily accessible by the street. One that was hidden from plain view that she had to inquire about on a payphone ahead of time.
She might be paranoid.
It was better safe than sorry.
She pressed the buzzer and waited, her body brimming with nervous energy.
Is this stupid? Maybe this is stupid.
She shouldn’t be doing this.
She was taking a risk. Going against the things that she believed in and for what? A question that had gone unanswered? Life was full of unanswered questions and Shadowheart should know how to deal with that by now.
“State your name and business,” The person on the end of the line answered. The voice belonged to a rather surly woman. She spoke with a similar sternness to Mother Superior, but there was a warmth to her voice Shadowheart was unfamiliar with.
“Shadowheart… I have an appointment.”
There was a pause before the door unlocked.
“Come in.”
Shadowheart let herself in and walked up to find a half-elf working at the front desk. The woman looked vaguely familiar, like she might’ve seen her before, but Shadowheart couldn’t really put her finger on it. “Ah, I am glad that actually worked. I don’t usually work the front desk, but her other receptionist was out. I’m Jaheira. I’m told you can go in.”
“Great,” Shadowheart said. “Thank you.”
She was glad that she didn’t have to do any small talk. She hadn’t really planned talking to anyone outside of Vaelyn and the group of addresses she was supposed to go doorbell to doorbell to.
Shadowheart wasn’t sure what she expected. She knew drow had a reputation for being rude and arrogant. She knew that while Vaelyn had solved a lot of cold cases and also reunited a lot of people with their families, she had been reported to be abrasive and hard to work with.
Maybe she was expecting someone more grizzled? Shadowheart couldn’t put her finger on it.
Vaelyn was not that.
Vaelyn was standing, looking at a board full of post-it notes scrawled in horrible handwriting. She had this slightly willowy look to her, simultaneously looking strong but able to be bent over by the wind at the same time. Her auburn hair caught the sunlight coming in through the window behind her. Her coloring reminded her of the banned books she used to read about pretty dryads finding their naiad soulmate.
Shadowheart felt her cheeks heat up. She cleared her throat to get Vaelyn’s attention. The drow turned towards her. “Ah. Shadowheart, I presume?” There was this distant look on her face. One that Shadowheart didn’t know how to judge. It was unlike the sorts of expressions that Mother Superior had taught her how to read before.
“Uh, yes. I was told it was alright to come in. Hope I’m not interrupting something.”
“Nope,” Vaelyn replied. “You’re not. Come. Sit. You were rather vague in your communications. Tell me why you’re here.”
Shadowheart took a few steps forward and then stopped herself. “It’s probably best if I stand. I can’t be too long.”
“Alright,” Vaelyn didn’t push at all. She cocked her head to the side, eyes still distant but locked on to her. “Go ahead, tell me what you need.”
“Okay...first I need to ask you what you know about the Church of Shar?”
“Enough,” Vaelyn replied. She held up her hands, the first clear expression on her face. Disdain. “If you came here to proselytize, you’re wasting your time. I’ve had enough religion to fill several of your life times.”
“I-what-no. That’s not why I was asking.”
“Alright. I’m aware of the Church. I’m assuming you’re a member.”
“Yes. I am. I’ve been a member for...what I think...thought…I had been for my entire life.”
“But you believe you weren’t? Do you have any relatives in the church?”
“Not that I know of. I don’t know anything about my family.” She’d had dreams sometimes, though. Dreams of a man and a woman that bore some bit of resemblance to her. A man and a woman that she didn’t remember ever interacting with in her life. “And…I want to know. I want to trust my Mother Superior. She claimed that they abandoned me, that she saved me…”
Vaelyn watched her carefully as she spoke. The entire time she did, Shadowheart couldn’t help but wish that she was easier to read. She was used to seeing clear disgust or contempt on the faces of outsiders that knew that she worshiped Lady Shar. She was used to seeing clear expressions on the faces of others that her cloister would watch in order to learn more on the behavior of people.
She only saw one clear expression the entire conversation, and that was when she thought Shadowheart was there to recruit her. Her face remained a neutral mask the rest of the time.
When Shadowheart was done rambling, she nearly convinced herself that Vaelyn wasn’t going to take the case. She looked over at Vaelyn, ready to hear the rejection, only to watch as she sighed. “I’m going to need a few strands of your hair.”
“My hair?”
“Yes, your hair. Your...superior...doesn’t know that you’re here, correct?”
“Correct.”
“Taking a blood sample would be fairly noticeable. Don’t want you to get in trouble. A hair sample should allow me to check the DNA databases and also get to my wizard friend in order for him to run a few location spells. The first twenty-four hours I work your case I do for free, I can give you a discounted rate. I assume you don’t have your own money?”
Shit.
That was the one thing she hadn’t really thought through. Shadowheart didn’t even have a bank account. Before she could say anything, Vaelyn shrugged. “I read once that your cult—”
“—It’s not a cult!” Shadowheart had heard that before. She should have expected to hear that here.
“—Right, sorry. Your church, supposedly brews their own pain relieving potions?”
“Yes. That’s right.”
“We’ll meet again in half a month. I’ll take whatever you can sneak out without getting caught. If you want to talk about actual compensation at the point of me finding actual results, we can. I don’t expect it, though.”
Shadowheart was stunned.
She was told people outside the church were typically selfish. This type of deal seemed heavily steeped in Shadowheart’s favor, though.
“Really?”
“Really,” Vaelyn returned her attention back to the board she had been scrutinizing earlier. “I’ve had enough work to take barter as payment this time around. Don’t worry about it.”
There was the brusque and abrasive tone that she had been expecting from the rest of the conversation.
“You can go now. Leave your sample with Jaheira at the front desk. Take the back way out again.”
“Oh...okay. Thank you. Really.”
“Of course,” Vaelyn replied amiably.
Shadowheart left, still unsure of how to feel. She thought that she might have to beg a little for Vaelyn to take on her case. Vaelyn’s own demeanor was one that she might’ve expected for someone that would’ve expected full payment. And yet…
Shadowheart left a sample with Jaheira and then left in a hurry. She kept her head down and kept to the alleyways to get back to where she was supposed to be. Nocturne was already waiting for her in the back of the empty cafe that they picked as the rendezvous point. “There you are,” She said, “how did it go?”
“She took my case. Didn’t even want actual money for it.”
“That’s great! That’s what you wanted, right?”
“Right.”
She did want it.
Even though all of her teachings told her that she wasn’t supposed to.
“But will Lady Shar be mad at me?” She asked.
“Oh, I don’t think Lady Shar will be mad at you,” Nocturne replied. “If she didn’t want you to know about your family, she would have punished you already, right.”
“She might still. She might’ve been waiting for me to-to—”
“—Woah, okay. I really don’t think that Lady Shar would be mad about this. It’s not like you’re actually facilitating a relationship with anyone. You’re just trying to figure stuff out about yourself. Plus, there are the dreams…”
“Right. You’re right. I’m just… I’ll be better once the day is done. If we get through this day without getting caught, everything will be alright.”
Nocturne considered this. She afforded Shadowheart a gentle smile. “That’s right. We’ll get through this. Everything else will be alright.”
Nocturne lead Shadowheart out of that diner and back towards the cloister. The whole time Shadowheart just hoped that she was actually right.