Chapter Text
Saturday, February 21
Taking a deep breath, you stare blankly at the screen in front of you. The blaring white of the digital page is nearly blinding. "How hard is it to write a few paragraphs?!" you mumble to yourself, your frustration mounting as you stare at the blink of the cursor. You start counting the flashes, 1, 2, 3, 4... you realize you've zoned out again and you blink rapidly to restore the moisture to your tired eyes.
You've been wanting to write this story for over a month. When you're at work, you can almost see it playing out in your mind, but then when you get home from the long day, inspiration has gone out the window, along with your will to do anything else aside from eat ramen and mindlessly consume a never-ending string of YouTube videos. Variety shows, meme compilations, music videos, and idol vlogs. So many that by the time you're done, the night is gone and you tell yourself it's ok, you'll try writing again tomorrow. You're sure the inspiration will come, but then the pattern repeats itself.
Today, you were determined to break the spell. But now that you're here in front of your laptop, the writer's block that seems to have plagued you is back in full force. Your eyes tilt to the side where the small shrine adorns your desk. Photos of your favorite person in the world stare back at you. Judging you. "I'm trying, ok??! What do you want from me?" you ask. He doesn't answer back and you let a heavy puff of air escape your lips. Then it happens, you start typing, inspiration strikes, you can see it all unfolding in your head as you quickly type out the words that build the small piece of this world you've been envisioning. Hours pass in what feels like moments and finally, back aching, stomach growling, you realize you're at the stopping point for the first chapter. A tale of pirates, espionage, deceptions, and love. Lost and found family. It's a beautiful start to something you know could grow into an incredible story that you've been dying to tell.
You look back over to the photos and softly smile. "I hope you're happy now. I think you'd like this story. Why am I talking to picture..." you say as you slowly come to the realization that you sound just a little bit insane. You gently close the laptop and head to bed for the evening. Finally feeling a bit of peace in your soul for starting this journey. "I hope people will read it. If even one person enjoys it, I'll be happy." you whisper to yourself as your eyes drift shut.
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Wednesday, February 25
You walk into the coffee shop you frequent every Wednesday afternoon and plop down into a corner booth with your drink and laptop in hand. Work has been swamped and you haven't had a chance to catch up on your socials whatsoever since the weekend. You get settled and open the laptop, waiting for everything to come to life while you sip at your drink. You pull the notepad and mechanical pencil from your bag and get settled in so you can jot down notes as you write. Not wanting to forget or lose track of a single detail. Ready to start chapter 2, you open up the webpage to your profile and go back to review what you'd written previously.
That's when you notice the comment.
"Is this really how you think I behave?"
You stare at it for what feels like an eternity. Then shake your head, someone is just trolling you in the comments. You decide to continue on with the story, doing your best to ignore the nagging feeling in your chest and the discouragement that has settled into your psyche. You've always been sensitive to criticism and you are doing everything in your power not to let this comment have a negative impact on you.
Once you start writing the second chapter, time moves by rapidly and before you know it, your drink is empty and the chapter is complete. You proofread it for errors and once satisfied, your cursor hoovers over the "Post" button. The fear of logging back in and finding another negative comment resurfacing. "That person was just bored. I doubt they even remember which story they commented on." you say to yourself and click "Post". Closing the laptop, you pack away your things and head back home for the evening. Trying to push the comment from your mind at last.
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Thursday, February 26
"Another long day of work." you say to your cat as you enter your apartment building at the end of the day. "Did you miss me, Sandeoki?" you smile at the orange tabby as she rubs against the doorframe of your bedroom. You change into your favorite pajamas and settle into the desk chair to begin writing. Logging into your account, you once again check the view count on your story. That's when you see a new comment has been added. Hesitantly, you click the button to view the comment.
"I like where the story is going, but that's not what I would do in that situation. Maybe try making me a bit.. tougher?"