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Hi, my fellow freaky loons!
As a 29-year-old fangirl who’s recently come out of retirement, I have to start off by saying that I never thought I’d be back here. I signed out one night over 11 years ago and never signed back in, leaving my smut writing days behind me in my adolescence. Spoke of it as something cursed I used to do back in the day, and grew out of.
“I can be normal about this.” I thought, firing up ‘Heated Rivalry’ for the first time. “Surely, this won’t activate anything in me like a sleeper agent.” I told my fiancé, as I ordered all 6 books. “This is only for reading purposes!” I cried as I signed up for a new A03 account.
In my defense, I resisted the smut-writing demon for a good, long time. But then, Criminal Minds.
He had the nerve to go on Criminal Minds.
My favorite TV show.
And, as I delved back in to revisit the previous 18 seasons as a lite refresher course, (the girlies who get it, get it), I was activated again.
Ah, yes. My favorite ship. Reid and Morgan. Grumpy x Sunshine. Athletic x Autistic. Sweet, tortured characters coming together in a found family. Two idiots standing in their own way. Big, dumb, protective jock man and bookish nerd learning to work together and oh. OH. Oh. There’s something here.
A03 and HR called to me like the Green Goblin mask, and well…
I’ve decided these smut-writing skills aren't cursed. They're gifts. And, while pain can't be avoided... it can be shared. Vigorously.
I’ve come to gift you some pain, my dears.
Now, a warning.
We’re going to have a “Dead Dove, Do Not Eat” situation here. Please read the tags. I am writing in the Criminal Minds universe, and respectfully, some f*cked up sh*t happens in that show, and to those characters. I’m not shying away from that. This means you’re going to read plot lines that could live/exist in that universe. Characters will die and exit the plot in similar fashions.
H O W E V E R, your main characters as you know them both in CM and HR, will live! No MAJOR character deaths, I promise. I am also going to promise you HEA here. You also have my promise that storylines around SA won’t be included, and will be excluded from plots/cases that had them initially. Yes, it’s a part of true crime, but it doesn’t have to be a part of the story here, and as a boundary of my own, it won’t be.
Please know, this is all the warning you will get. I’m an old-school fangirl approaching middle age; I’m not arguing with you. Go argue with your mama, I’m not listening. I’m doing this for funsies, and I will pull the whole thing if we as a community can’t act right.
So, walk with me if you want to, and come on this journey as we fight to get these characters together despite themselves!
We’re mixing show/book canon, and Criminal Minds canon events and ships, with a good amount of non-canon, timelines, etc. If you think you know a plot line, no, you don’t. We’re mixin it up over here. That said, I intend to show you all a great time!
TL; PR:
If storylines around violence, murder, drug use, kidnapping, and potential side character death/removal or deviation from familiar storylines upsets you, then please, don’t read this one. Don’t eat the dove or open the bag. This is not the fic for you, and that’s okay! Thank you for being here. I promise I’ll write some fluffy stuff eventually that you can come back to visit.
For the rest of you, enjoy!