Archive of Our Own

Harry lay on his bed in number 4 Privet Drive staring at the ceiling and reliving moments in his recent past. Sirius falling back through the veil, Dumbledore pleading him to stop making him drink, Snape leveling his wand at Dumbledore, Hagrid carrying Dumbledore's body... it was replaying in his mind like a muggle movie and he couldn't stop the images. He didn't want to stop them. He wanted to wallow for a bit. He knew he'd have to fight soon. Knew his moment to face Voldemort was fast approaching, but he didn't want to think about anything but his own pain and grief. He was tired of being The Boy Who Lived.

Glancing at his watch he realized he'd soon outgrow that title. In 27 minutes he would be a man by wizarding law. In 27 minutes, he would be able to cast the spells he needed to leave Privet Drive and Dumbledore's protection. The Dursleys were well aware of this fact and had been summarily silent throughout dinner. They even allowed him a second serving of roast beef and when he retreated to his dormitory without a backward glance or word, no one said a word in the contrary.

23 minutes and all would be different. He'd avenge Dumbledore's death... he'd find the slimy Potions Master and make him pay for his betrayal!

21 minutes and he'd have his chance. He'd find Voldy's hag and teach her what real pain feels like!

17 minutes... he'd ease the pain in his heart.

13 minutes... he'd track them down and one by one destroy all who'd taken everything from him.

9 minutes... in less than ten minutes he'd be on his Horcrux search and finally put an end to the bastard's reign of terror. It had to stop.

The door blasted open and in seconds, Harry had his wand leveled at the shabby-dressed man before him. The tattered robes of his former DADA professor were soot-covered and before Harry could utter a curse or ask why Remus Lupin had to blast into his bedroom, he found himself enveloped in a body-wrapping hug.

"Re-remus" Harry stuttered while pressing his face into his chest and inhaling deeply. "What are you doing here? I mean..."

"Harry, no time really now, we have to move out of here. They're close. I can feel them." Remus said hurriedly, shifting Harry around until his back was pressed deeply into Remus's own chest. Placing a quick kiss on the crown of Harry's head, Remus summoned Harry's trunk and quickly Apparated them away.

As they landed in a single roomed abode, Remus whirled Harry around, casting one charm after another. Within seconds, Harry felt the tingle of protective spells fly up around the room. As that was accomplished he felt Remus relax.

"Prof - Remus, are you going to tell me what's going on..." Harry began, looking to his mentor for some answers for their quick departure.

Remus held him tight and whispered, "I love you, Harry." Three words he'd never quite thought to hear from his former professor and definitely not from the man who was like a father to him. Pushing against Remus' chest, his eyes flashing in anger and chest heaving, he glared at Remus.

"What?"

"I love you, Harry," Remus repeated quietly. He stood almost stoically, blinking slowly, his eyes fixed on Harry's.

"I heard what you said, but why are you saying that?"

"Because I do," Remus replied. "I love you, Harry."

"Stop saying that!"

"Why? Will it make it less real if I do?" Remus asked taking a step toward Harry who quickly backed away. "It's alright if you don't feel the same."

"Feel the same?" Harry asked aghast. How could he possibly expect him to say something like that... to a teacher no less! He'd loved people before, he understood the concept, but... to just say it so freely and without warning or reason. "It's very presumptuous of you isn't it?"

"What? To tell you that I love you? Even if it is presumptuous," he said closing the distance between them. "It's true." He took Harry's wrists in his and brought him flush against him, wrapping his arms around him protectively.

Harry began to melt into the embrace. "You can't love me. No one can love me. You'll just get hurt. I'm not...I'm not good to be around"

"You won't hurt me Harry. I know you won't" Remus replied matter-of-factly. His hands still stroking up Harry's back, trying to soothe away the tension.

"But...I have to go, R-remus. I have to kill him. I won't let him ki-hurt anyone else." Harry collapsed, trying not to sob into the older man's chest.

"You have your job, Harry...and I have mine. You have to get rid of the snake bastard. But it's my job to take care of you. I'm here to protect you. I love you."

"Just stop SAYING THAT" Harry yelled, pulling away from Remus. "You don't understand I have to go, I have to leave and take care of this."

"No, Harry. You need to stay here. And you need to listen to me. I've been tasked to protect you. You are mine. And I won't let anything happen to you. I love you."

Remus lay soft kisses on Harry's head, his hands caressing Harry's back all the while whispering how much he loved him. Harry wanted to push him away and turn his head up to kiss him all at the same time. The conflicting thoughts were warring in his mind when Remus' words caught up to him.

Tasked... tasked to protect you... protect you.

"Protect me?" Harry finally asked, pushing away from the warmth of Remus' chest. "Tasked? You're doing this because you were ordered to protect me?"

Sighing, Remus looked into Harry's eyes then lowered his gaze. "You've been awarded a Protector, a wizarding guardian to do what is necessary to ensure your safety, yes. But, I wasn't ordered to love you."

"Who ordered you?" Harry roared. "And stop saying you love me? Do you even know what it means?"

"To love someone unconditionally? To feel your soul tear at the loss of one you love?" Remus asked cupping Harry's cheek. "To watch him falling through to the other side over and over again?" He whispered against Harry's lips.

"Stop it," Harry whispered, his bottom lip trembling with the effort to keep from crying. "Don't mention him!"

Running his tongue across Harry's bottom lip, Remus looked into Harry's eyes. "Who do you think asked me to protect you?" He caught Harry's lips in a bruising kiss, threading his fingers in Harry's unruly hair and swallowing Harry's gasp of surprise. He sipped from Harry's mouth, nibbled on his bottom lip before coaxing Harry's mouth open with his tongue. Demanding entrance, he deepened the kiss, his tongue sweeping across Harry's.

I'm kissing a Professor... the man my godfather left to protect me... a werewolf…

Harry's eyes snapped open and wide-eyed he watched as Remus' eyes slid closed.

 

Harry reveled in the soft, warm touch for a few moments longer before he pulled back. Not wanting to lose the contact completely, he stayed within Remus's embrace, resting his head on the older man's shoulder.

"Protector" Harry felt a spark of energy flow through his body as he whispered the word. "How can you protect me? This isn't your battle to fight."

Remus sighed as Harry pulled away, but was happy as he realized the boy wasn't struggling any longer. "Just what it sounds like. You may be out to save the entire world. But I'm here to save you."

Harry murmured something quietly into Remus's shoulder, and tightened his grip around the bony shoulders. Lifting his head, he stared at Remus with a piercing glance. "You said that Si- that he sent you. That you're my Protector. What does that mean?"

"A Protector is something of a proxy." Remus began explaining, "Protectors were usually created to ensure the safety of a child. They are created from love. When a person passes on, the power of that love is passed onto The Protector. Your parents made Sirius your Protector when they were...when they died. And Sirius made me your Protector. In this way, it's very true - the ones who love us never really leave us. That love is just multiplied."

"So, that's why you keep saying you love me." Harry whispered, scrubbing at the pricking tears. "You have to love me because Sirius made you."

Remus captured Harry's face in his hands, and forced the boy, no...Now a man, to look at him. "Harry, I loved you before any of this happened. I think I've loved you since I first saw you. This..." Remus pulled Harry's hand and placed it on his pounding heart. "This has nothing to do with any promise I ever made anyone. I love you, Harry."

 

So many thoughts were now racing through Harry's mind. He wanted to believe... wanted to really believe that this was true. That this... feeling was real. The thumping beneath his hand was real enough. The love reflected in Remus' amber eyes was real enough... wasn't it?

"Don't think," Remus whispered, lifting Harry's chin to meet the young man's gaze. "Feel," and taking Harry's hand, he guided it down the hard planes of his chest to his stomach and lower until he felt Harry resist.

"I can't love you... I've never..."

"Never loved?" Remus asked kissing the corners of Harry's mouth. "Or never..."

"Either!" Harry said pushing Remus away. "I... I don't know that I can do this," he said gasping for breath. His body was reacting to Remus' and as much as he wanted to deny it, his body continued to betray his thoughts. He wanted to see if under the tattered robes the man was as hard as he was, but he couldn't admit to himself that he was... he was...

"I'm not gay," Harry said quickly, wiping his lips with the back of his hand. "I'm not, I... I've damn near shagged Ginny!"

Remus continued to invade Harry's personal space, taking long strides to stand inches from the shorter man until finally, pressing him against the wall of the small room they were in, he framed Harry's head with his hands and pressed his hips against Harry's.

"I love you, Harry and this has nothing to do with whether you're gay or not," he said grinding his hips against Harry's. "Does it feel good?" Leaning in, he kissed Harry's pulse point and trailed a hand up Harry's shirt.

"Yessss," Harry hissed. Leaning into the caressing touches at so many different parts of his body. His mind was beginning to overload. Dropping his hands, he brought them to rest on Remus's hips, slowing the thrusting motion.

Sliding his hips languorously against the taller man, he let out a small moan and threw his head back against the wall. Seeing the motion as an offer to claim, Remus bent forward and captured the skin of Harry's exposed neck between his teeth and pulled gently.

The combined sensation was too much, too quickly for Harry. But as he tried to squirm away, he was trapped by the wall behind him, and Remus all around him. His scent. His body. His warmth. And suddenly, it didn't matter that he wasn't gay. It didn't matter that he had a mission. It didn't matter that he wasn't supposed to love anyone. He wanted Remus. He wanted to belong to Remus. And there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Raising shaky hands inside Remus's robes, he traced light patterns on the soft skin at his sides. Remus moaned at the light touch, and renewed his attack on Harry's neck, biting, sucking and laving at the warm skin.

 

Remus' skin was warm, warmer than Harry had imagined and Remus' renewed assault on Harry's neck was clouding his mind of anything outside of the moment he was in. Being enveloped by the werewolf completely was making Harry's body react quickly. He was throbbing by the time Remus released his neck and panting through what he knew were likely swollen lips, he looked up into Remus' eyes and almost pleadingly begged for release.

"Hurts," he managed hoarsely.

"Did I hurt you?" Remus asked checking Harry's neck for broken skin. He didn't want to pierce the boy's skin with his teeth and risk infecting him, but he'd almost lost all control.

"No," Harry said licking his lips, "this hurts." He took Remus' hand and brought it to his now pulsing cock, moaning when Remus palmed his erection through his jeans and did the same with Harry's hand.

"Let me make it better," he whispered against Harry's lips and slid quickly to his knees. Unsnapping Harry's flies and tugging down the man's jeans and pants, he licked the tip of Harry's exposed cock and met the almost black-green eyes before wrapping his lips around the base of Harry's cock.

Harry's legs began to tremble and he started to slide down the wall. Remus released his cock with a pop, mumbling throatily, "Bed"

Gathering the young man to his chest, Remus quickly made his way to the bed in the corner. Harry wrapped his arms around, and leaned forward to kiss ever exposed inch of skin he could reach.

"Remusss..more," Harry whispered as he was lowered to the bed. He tugged at his former professor's clothes while the same was done to him. Soon the two men were pressed skin to skin, writhing on the bed.

Remus slowly kissed his way back down to Harry's leaking cock. Looking up at the moaning boy with a gleam in his eye, he swallowed the prick in one smooth motion, not stopping until his nose was nestled in the dark thatch of hair surrounding Harry's cock.

 

Harry hissed as his back bowed off the bed and threading his fingers in Remus' long tawny locks, he thrust his hips forward to delve deeper down Remus' throat. His entire body felt like it was rapidly catching on fire as Remus licked, slurped and swallowed the younger man's flesh. Harry's whimpering moans urged Remus on and lacing his fingers with Harry's on the small bed, he continued his assault on Harry's cock.

Spreading his legs and planting his feet on the bed, Harry undulated his hips on the bed and started fucking Remus' mouth in earnest. The slick heat felt wonderful and meeting Remus' eyes as he moved his hips faster, he could practically feel those three words enveloping him again.

Releasing him with a pop, Remus licked his fingers and Harry moaned at the site. Running his fingers along Harry's cleft, Remus slid back up to Harry's face and whispered in his ear.

"I love you, Harry. Make me yours," he purred and slipping a finger inside Harry's tight heat, he growled. "I want to make you mine as well."

"Yours" Harry panted, trying to squirm away from and further down the invading fingers at the same time. "I'm all yours Pro- Remus"

Harry kept up a muttered string of praise as Remus carefully prepared him. His cock twitched on his stomach at a particularly deep thrust.

"Fuck me, claim me, I'm yours." Harry began screaming as he thrashed back and forth on the bed.

Remus sat back, murmuring a spell to envelop prick in a warm oil. Leaning forward, Remus pressed his lips to Harry's to whisper, "I love you" before thrusting himself completely inside the smaller man's warmth.

 

Harry gasped and threw his head back, thrashing against the pillow as Remus drove himself balls-deep inside his young lover. His eyes were shut tightly and fisting the sheets, he cursed when Remus drew back and plunged himself deep inside him again.

Lifting Harry's legs, Remus placed them on his shoulders and pushing himself forward, he gripped the headboard and jackhammered into Harry who was now clutching the sheets so tightly, his knuckles were white. The assault on his prostate, coupled with the feral look in Remus' eyes nearly did Harry in, but locking his ankles behind Remus' neck, he clenched around the invading prick then met his thrusts.

"Yours," he panted. "Yours... yours... yo..." His eyes rolled in the back of his head as Remus pounded into him and with a growl, filled him to the brink with hot, thick cum. Harry could feel it oozing out as Remus slowly slid out of him apologizing for not pulling out.

"I'm sorry, Harry," he said lowering his head. "I... I lost control."

Lying there, completely debauched, sweat-soaked and dripping cum, Harry smiled. "I like it when you lose control, Professor."

"Don't call me that," Remus said covering his face in his hands. "I only wanted to protect you. I didn't want to lose control that way."

Sitting up, Harry summoned his wand and cast a cleansing charm before sliding his legs around Remus's waist and straddling the werewolf on the bed. "My turn," he said with a mischievous smile.

"You're not angry with me?" Remus asked wrapping his arms around Harry, smiling when Harry's eyes rolled back again as he licked his palm and wrapped it around Harry's throbbing cock.

"Not...not angry." Harry panted, thrusting his hips upward into Remus' warm grasp. "And you - OH hell - you make me lose - aaaa - lose control...Professor."

"You're teasing me?" Remus laughed, "When I have you like this?" He punctuated each word with a tight squeeze. "Lose control? I'll show you losing control.

Remus quickly flipped the pair of them over until Harry was flat on his back, legs still coiled around his waist. Leaning forward, Remus nipped Harry's ear, sucking even more of the lobe into his mouth as Harry began to moan.

"Close...Prof-" Harry cut off as Remus nipped harder, "Remus, I'm coming - OH OH - NOW". Harry shuddered his orgasm, pressing his face into Remus' warm neck, inhaling the warm scent, while thrusting his hips more firmly into the man above him.

Collapsing on Harry, Remus waited for his young lover's legs to slide back to the mattress before flipping over onto his back beside him. Panting, he summoned his wand and trousers. Searching the pockets, he pulled a box of cigarettes and with trembling hands brought the fag to his lips, lighting it with his wand.

Blowing the smoke away from Harry and staring out of the small window in the room, he sighed.

"Are you... are you angry with me?" Harry asked tentatively.

Turning his head, Remus found Harry's emerald gaze inches from his face.

"I love you, Harry."

"You keep sayiing that, but you haven't answered my question."

Turning his face away from Harry again, Remus smiled. "No, Harry. I'm not angry with you." Crushing the cigarette butt on the small bedstand table, he turned and enveloped Harry in his arms.

"Love you, Harry."

"I love you too... Remus."

 

In the distance, a dog bayed at the moon and looking closely one may have seen the small star glint in reply.