Work Text:
“So… um… I was wondering if you could sleep on the couch tonight. Kurt’s—”
“No.” She drops her spoon in her cereal bowl with a clang and glares at Blaine. “No, I’m not going to sleep on the couch to you and Kurt can go at in one room while Cedes and Sam are going at it in the other.”
“TayTay, please—”
She sighs, brushing her hair from her face. It’s not even eight in the morning and she’s already being kicked out of her room for the night. “Blaine, Kurt has a bed too. A much bigger bed.”
“But Kurt doesn’t have walls,” he whines, peeling his orange. “We have walls and doors—”
“And I have a dance rehearsal until ten tonight, won’t be home until almost eleven and would like to sleep in my own bed.” She leans back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest. “Blaine, come on, I slept on the couch four nights last week.”
Blaine sighs. He knows she’s right and if the roles were reversed, he would have put up a fight long ago. But Tina’s been patient with him ever since she and Sam swapped rooms several months ago. The only time she wouldn’t vacate the room when he asked was when she had the flu for a week and could barely sit up let alone walk to the couch. But that didn’t really count.
“Okay, we’ll be done by the time you get home, I promise.” He reaches across the table and tugs her hand loose. A smile breaks her stony resolve and she sighs.
“Thank you.”
That night, Tina comes home from rehearsal exhausted and sore and wanting nothing more than a hot shower and to collapse in her warm bed. Which she would do, except her door is locked and the Dalton tie is still looped over the knob.
She groans, trying to mentally block the noises coming from her room.
“—more, harder…fuck, Blaine—”
“—got you, yesssss—Kurt, yes—”
“Are you kidding me?” she mutters, glancing at her watch. The train had stalled and the normally forty-five minute ride had lasted an hour and a half. It was practically midnight. She strips off her coat and scarf, drops her bag with a thud on the floor by the door and goes to the bathroom to shower off the sweat and subway grime. Hopefully they heard her and will be done by the time she out of the bathroom. And that door is locked as well. “Are you fucking kidding me?!”
Over the sound of the water, she can hear Sam and Mercedes’ breathless moans.
“—taste so good, Merce, so good—”
“—uuuuhhhhhh, Sam—”
She stomps as loudly as she can into the living room and throws herself onto the couch and stews for all of one minute before she goes into the kitchen. She throws open the cabinet that holds their pots and pans and pulls out the wok her dad insisted she bring but has never been used. At least, not until now. She grabs a wooden spoon from the drawer and begins marching up and down the hall, banging the spoon on the wok.
“MANDATORY ROOMMATE MEETING. MANDATORY ROOMMATE MEETING. YOU HAVE TWO MINUTES TO COVER YOUR JUNK AND GET YOUR ASSES IN THE LIVING ROOM OR ELSE.”
“Tina, what the hell?” Blaine hisses, throwing open the door. He’s obviously still naked but all she can see is his bare shoulder. “What are you doing home it’s only—” he checks his watch and Tina tries not think about what he’s been doing with this hands “—midnight. Shit.”
“Exactly. Shit.” She bangs on the wok again as she nears the bathroom door. *NINETY SECONDS.”
Blaine closes the bedroom door and she can hear them shuffling around inside. Good. The water shuts off and she smiles. Good.
Less than a minute later, Kurt and Blaine are in their PJs on the couch beside Sam and Mercedes. Sam is wearing the fluffy purple robe that Tina gave Mercedes for Christmas and Mercedes is wearing a light blue nightie that Tina knows she only breaks out for special occasions. She still has her shower cap on. They all look like they just got busted by their moms.
“Look, I love you guys but this is getting out of hand.” She paces in front of them, hands on her hips, heels clicking on the wooden floor. “Blaine, I told you when I’d be home—”
“I know, I’m sorry, we lost track of time—”
“And I was late and you guys were still doing it!” She glares at him and Kurt. “You know, I’m happy for you, all of you, but seriously! I live here too and I shouldn't have to clear out just because I don’t have someone to have sex with.”
“Tina, we’re really sorry—” Sam starts but she silents him with a look.
“And you! You two share a room! And we agreed, no sex in the common areas, including the bathroom!”
“But Blaine and Kurt do it in the shower all the time!” he shouts. Blaine punches his shoulder. “Shit, sorry!”
Tina sits in the recliner, holding her head in his hands. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”
“Sweetie, you’re right, okay?” Mercedes says, coming over to rub her back. She refuses to let it feel good, no matter how tired her muscles are. “We’ll try to keep it to our room and they’ll try to be more understanding, right boys?”
“Yes, absolutely,” Kurt says, a deep blush on his face.
“It’s—I don’t mind that you have sex in our room—” Kurt flushes a deeper red “—just set your alarm, okay?”
“Yes, understood,” Blaine nods, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“You need to get la-OW!” Sam starts before he’s silenced by three sets of hands smacking him.
“Okay, go to bed you nymphos,” she sighs, closing her eyes. “I’ll sleep on the couch tonight, but you all owe me, understood?”
There’s a chorus of ‘Yes, Tinas’ and ‘Of course, Tinas’ as they all shuffle off to bed. She goes into her room to get her pajamas and pillow, ignoring how Kurt spoons Blaine. There is no way she could have slept in there. It reeks of sex and boy and all it does is highlight how alone she is in comparison to her friends. She changes in the bathroom, forgoing a shower to take one in the morning before class. She tosses her pillow on the couch and lays down, shoving her earbuds in and turning on the white noise app she likes. She’s still angry but exhaustion takes over and she’s awake before she realizes that she had closed her eyes.
On the coffee table sits a plate of still warm french toast and sausage links, a cup of black coffee and a gift card to Panera that will cover her pre-rehearsal dinners for the next month.
She’s still angry, but less so. Because even though she lives with a bunch of horny assholes, she loves them and knows they’ll do better.