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Veronica Sterling was many things, but she wasn't a coward. So why did kissing her best friend seem so scary?
They had been really close during the last few weeks. She knew he was a person she could rely on no matter what. They could trust each other with secrets, talk about serious things, laugh about anything, like best friends do. The thing was, she didn't feel the same for him as she did for Scarlett. He was her best friend, but she wanted to be more than that.
She realized it when she felt a little buzz in her stomach when he hugged her for her birthday. Then she started to notice that she smiled at everything he did, that she was always looking forward to seeing him in class, the little things that make you realize you like someone.
She was scared to tell him mostly because she didn't know how he felt. Of course she had a feeling he liked her back, but what if it was all in her head?
Veronica (or Ronnie, like he always called her) started to pay more attention to how he treated Scarlett, and it was different from the way he treated her. He didn't make much of an effort to touch their friend. He didn't look at her with those huge brown eyes. He didn't cuddle with her every time they watched a movie together.
So based on that, she came to the conclusion that she should take the risk and go for it. She could keep the most important person in her life as a friend and get jealous of every girl who got close to him, or she could be happy with him. She chose the second option.
It was a Friday, and they were having movie night without Scarlett, who was visiting her father for his birthday. Since Veronica shared her dorm with the other girl, it was only him and her.
When he arrived, he hugged Ronnie like he usually did, but it felt different from the other times somehow, maybe because it could be the last time if she confessed to him and he didn't feel the same. She shook the thought away.
“What are we watching today?” Tanner asked, already lying on her bed with his head on her pillow.
“Um, I don't know. You pick. But not horror, please,” Veronica replied while grabbing the snacks she had stocked on her dresser.
“Damn it, I had the perfect horror movie for us tonight. Let's watch it, please. I'll be here if you get scared. C'mon, Ronnie, please.” He looked at her with puppy eyes. How could she say no to that?
“Fine, but only if next time we watch the most tooth-rotting romcom,” she replied while lying down next to him. Really close to him. She didn't know if it was her imagination, but they seemed closer than usual.
“Ugh, okay. Anything for you, I guess.” He pretended to be bored, but she knew he was only being dramatic. He had always done anything for her
They started watching the movie on her laptop. Cuddling in a bed. Friends, my ass.
Their hands rested on the blanket, inches apart. Ronnie tried to focus on the movie, but every time Tanner moved, her attention snapped back to his hand.
His fingers brushed hers for a second.
Neither of them moved.
Ronnie's heart started beating faster. It could be an accident, but she preferred to think it was on purpose.
As the night went on, the movie continued, and it didn't take long for a scary scene to come up.
The jump scare made Ronnie gasp and grab Tanner's arm.
“Told you you'd get scared,” he laughed softly.
But he didn't move his arm away. Instead, he wrapped it around her shoulders.
Ronnie suddenly became very aware of how close they were.
His face was only inches from hers.
She couldn't help but stare at his facial features: the focused eyes, the tense jawline, the freckles on his face.
“Ronnie, are you okay? You look like you're not paying attention.”
“Yeah, sure.” Lies. She was worried that telling him how she felt would just make things awkward between them.
“If you're scared, we can watch something else. I don't mind.”
“No, I'm okay. Don't worry.”
The movie was still playing, but now she felt like neither of them was paying attention to it.
Ronnie looked at him and found him already looking at her.
For a moment, neither of them spoke.
Tanner opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then stopped.
Fuck it. If she didn't do this now, she feared she never would.
“Tanner, I want to tell you something.”
“Go ahead,” he said, leaning toward her and looking at her with such a caring expression that she felt like she could melt right into him.
“For the past few days… Not that it's wrong… Look, I know we are friends… No, that doesn't sound right either…” He kept staring at her with a curious expression. “Tanner, you are one of the most important people in my life. Our friendship means the world to me, and I can't imagine surviving college without you.”
“Aww, that's cute.”
“Wait, there's more,” she continued. “You are so important to me that I want to be more than just your friend. I want to be able to hug you, to kiss you, to tell everyone you're mine. I've been feeling like this for a while now.”
“Ronnie…”
“Let me finish,” she cut him off. “I know this might be awkward if you don't feel the same, but I think it's not fair to you if I don't tell you the truth about how I feel. I really like you—more than I've ever liked any other boy before. But if you don't like me back, don't feel pressured to. I'll understand. I just needed you to know.”
She looked into his eyes, trying to find an answer, hoping she hadn't screwed up everything.
The biggest smile appeared on his face.
“Tell me this isn't a dream, because it sure feels like it,” he said, and she laughed. “Ronnie, you're the most amazing person I know, and I'd be a fool if I didn't have feelings for you. Of course I like you too. You have no idea how many times I've tried to tell you but got scared. I'm glad you were braver than me.”
Both of their hearts felt like they were going to explode. They were unconsciously leaning toward each other when Tanner cupped Ronnie's cheek with his hand.
“Do you know that your pupils are dilated?” he said as he got closer to her face.
She wasn't looking at his eyes, but at his mouth. She wanted to kiss him so badly.
He leaned closer.
Ronnie could feel his breath against her lips.
For a second, neither of them moved.
“Are you sure you wan—”
He got interrupted.
“Tanner, just shut up and kiss me right now.”
And he did.
He gave her a passionate kiss that started a little awkward and crooked, but they would fix it with time. They had no rush.
After all, they had the whole weekend to learn how to kiss each other before they had to tell Scarlett.