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2013-05-18
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The Trouble with Sulu and Chekov

Summary:

Sulu and Chekov catch a space disease that makes them act like tribbles: all they want to do is have sex, eat, nap, and coo at each other.

Notes:

Last one! Sorry for spamming the tag.

(See the end of the work for other works inspired by this one.)

Work Text:

Pavel is intensely bored. Usually he can occupy himself with some side research on his data screen if things are moving slowly during his shift, but today he's not interested. He's hungry, and kind of sleepy, and he's still got another hour before lunch. He looks over at Hikaru, who looks just as bored as Pavel feels. Pavel glances over his shoulder at Kirk and sees him deep in conversation with Spock, discussing possible explanations for the readings they took during their last away mission, blah blah blah. Boring. He scoots a little closer to Hikaru, who turns to him and smiles.

"Hey," Hikaru whispers.

"Hey."

"Want to go back to our room at lunch?"

Pavel's smile widens. "I was thinking the exact same thing, Hikashka."

"Shh," Hikaru says, laughing. Pavel isn't allowed to call Hikaru that on the bridge. He forgot. He smiles and admires his boyfriend, thinking about what they'll use their lunch hour for. He's not sure what he's looking forward to more, the sex or the pizza rolls they'll get from the replicator. Mmm, pizza rolls. Sex with Hikaru. His ass clenches in anticipation, and he has to hold in a happy moan. Life has been so good since he met Hikaru, so warm and cozy and content. He scoots a little closer, thinking Hikaru might tell him to back off and act like a professional, but Hikaru moves his chair closer to Pavel's, too, staring at Pavel's mouth.

"You smell good," Pavel whispers. He checks over his shoulder, and when he sees that Kirk is still distracted, he reaches over to touch Hikaru's ear. Hikaru's eyes slide shut slowly, and he sighs as Pavel massages his ear lobe. Pavel's fingers move down to Hikaru's neck, scratching him there as Hikaru tilts his head to offer him better access, and Pavel's leg begins to bounce, his whole body itching to rub against Hikaru's.

"Ahem."

They both turn to see Spock staring at them sternly and Kirk looking confused, his mouth open. Hikaru and Pavel mutter their apologies and slide back to their respective data screens, cheeks blazing.

"Keep it off the bridge, boys," Kirk says, sounding more amused than angry. "I swear," he says to Spock. "They're like tribbles."

Pavel should feel insulted by this, but he doesn't really care. All he can think about is lunch and Hikaru, and their bed, how good it will feel to curl up in it while Hikaru nuzzles and undresses him.

When lunch break finally arrives, Pavel and Hikaru practically run for the lift, and though they're not alone, they clutch at each other as it takes them up to the deck where their bed awaits, Pavel rubbing his face against Hikaru's neck and Hikaru reaching up under Pavel's uniform shirt to rub his back. Everyone else in the lift gives them horrified looks, but Pavel doesn't care. They've never been in love like this.

By the time they reach their room, Pavel is already unbuttoning Hikaru's trousers, making him laugh as he punches in the code to open the door. He picks Pavel up and carries him bodily to the bed, where he deposits him and promptly mounts him. Pavel moans, needing Hikaru so much that he feels almost drugged on the smell of him, and on the taste of his mouth as they kiss lazily, pulling each other's shirts off.

"Mmm, so pretty," Hikaru whispers as he kisses his way down Pavel's neck to his shoulder, licking his freckles. Pavel giggles and humps Hikaru's leg, which is rubbing between Pavel's.

"I wanted to lick you at the conn," Pavel says as he watches Hikaru shove down his pants. "Hikashka, oh, come here," he whines, unable to stand being away from the heat of Hikaru's skin for even a moment.

They can't seem to coordinate once they're naked, and for a long time they just rub against each other and moan, clutching and kissing and pushing contented little noises into each other's mouths. Pavel was in a hurry before, but now that he's got Hikaru pressed against him he doesn't mind if this takes all day.

"I want to fill you up," Hikaru whispers, his voice cracking as if he can hardly stand how true this is. "Need to -- empty myself in you, baby, make you full and wet and --"

"Yes, yes," Pavel says, scrabbling around on the bedside table until he finds the lube. "Yes, Hikashka, fill me, oh, put your seed in me, I need it."

Pavel has never called it or even thought of it as Hikaru's seed before, but that's exactly what it is, and the idea turns him on tremendously as Hikaru begins to finger him open. Pavel rolls over, wanting doggy-style right away, though they usually start with Pavel on his back and just finish this way. Hikaru seems to like this plan, and he slides over Pavel's back as he pushes into him, making little mph, mph! noises that Pavel has never heard from him before. Pavel's moans come out squeaky and high-pitched as Hikaru begins to fuck him, holding him tightly around his chest and licking the back of Pavel's neck in long, hot strokes.

"So good, so good," Hikaru says. "My baby, so warm, and -- oh, I love you, Pasha, I love you."

Hikaru sounds like he might cry, and Pavel yelps out his agreement, pressing his hips back to meet Hikaru's short, quick thrusts.

"Love you, 'kashka," Pavel says. "W-want you inside me always, all the time."

"Yeah, oh -- oh, Pavel, here it comes, gonna fill you baby, fuck, oh --"

"Da, give to me, please, I need it, Hikashka, need all of it, oh!"

It's rare for them to come at the exact same moment, but it happens now, Pavel squealing and Hikaru grunting, his teeth closing over the curve between Pavel's neck and shoulder as he pumps Pavel full. They collapse onto the sheets, panting, Hikaru licking over the bite mark he left on Pavel's skin. He pulls out and rolls Pavel into his arms, wrapping his leg around Pavel's waist and rubbing his face against Pavel's, smiling and making soft noises. He's cooing at him, and Pavel is going to laugh, but then he realizes that he's doing it, too, contented little squeaks pushing out from the back of his throat, and he smiles, reveling in the afterglow.

"Are you hungry, baby?" Hikaru asks.

"Yes, very hungry," Pavel says. He covers Hikaru's jawline in little licks, not sure if he can bear to let go of him long enough to eat.

"Let me bring you some food," Hikaru says. He kisses Pavel's nose and wraps him in blankets before getting out of the bed. Pavel whines at the loss of his touch, and appreciates the view as Hikaru goes to the replicator naked, his cock still stiff and shiny, just beginning to soften.

"God, I love you," Pavel says when Hikaru returns to bed with pizza rolls, apple slices and chocolate milk. They sit with their backs to the headboard while they eat, the blankets pulled up to their chests, Hikaru's arm snug around Pavel's shoulders as he feeds him pieces of apple. Pavel giggles between every bite, squeezing and rubbing Hikaru's leg under the blanket.

When they're through, they shove the remains of the meal onto the bedside table, and Pavel curls up on his side, full and sleepy, ready for a nap. They've probably got time before they go back to the bridge. He considers looking at the clock, but then doesn't bother when Hikaru curls up behind him and begins licking the back of Pavel's neck, slow and soft, soothing him into sleep. Pavel hears himself making the cooing sound again, only it's muted now, less squeaky, more like a purr. He can feel Hikaru's come leaking from him, and though the sensation usually sends him running for a cloth to clean up with, right now it feels like the most profound thing he's ever experienced, reminding him of how well Hikaru filled him. Pavel feels marked, claimed, and he loves it. He pushes back more snugly against Hikaru, who is still licking him just under his hair line.

"Mine," Hikaru whispers, giving Pavel a squeeze. Pavel smiles and hums in agreement. He belongs to Hikaru, and Hikaru's come belongs inside him, and they belong together in this bed, tired and well-fed and warm. Everything is perfect.

They've only been asleep for ten minutes when someone pounds on the door. Hikaru sits up with alarm, turning his back on the door and hugging Pavel to his chest. He's looking over his shoulder at the door, frowning at it like he's ready to attack anyone who tries to come through it, and Pavel is hiding against Hikaru's chest, his heart beating fast.

"What?" Hikaru asks.

"Uh, you two are late for your shift. Captain said you weren't answering when he tried to call your comms. So he sent me to get you."

It's just Riley. Hikaru and Pavel both relax, Pavel nudging his nose against Hikaru's jaw. He wants to be fucked by Hikaru again, not to go back to the stupid, boring bridge. But Hikaru is sighing and climbing out of bed, pulling Pavel with him.

"Come on," he says. "We'll get in trouble if we don't hurry."

Pavel whines as he gets dressed, but Hikaru is right. He's not sure what's come over him, but at the moment the idea of anything other than languishing in bed with Hikaru and getting filled up again and again and again seems like torture. He holds Hikaru's hand as they walk down the hall toward the bridge, and Hikaru stops twice to press Pavel against a wall and rub against him. Pavel doesn't protest, even when people walk by stifling laughter, he just coos and licks Hikaru's face, wishing they could go back to bed.

Once they finally make it to the bridge they're both looking a little disheveled, but Pavel doesn't care. He doesn't care about the conn or the course or anything except that Hikaru is here with him, not touching him. Pavel can't stand it. He puts his elbow on the conn and rests his chin in his hand, gazing across the cold, white space between him and Hikaru, who is sneaking sad little looks at Pavel.

"Ensign!" Kirk snaps. Pavel turns and gives Kirk a look of vague interest, his chin still in his hand.

"Da?" he says. Kirk's eyebrows shoot up.

"Da, really? You're going to address your captain that way on the bridge?"

Pavel sighs and sits up straighter, struggling not to roll his eyes. Kirk just doesn't get it. None of this 'bridge' nonsense really matters. The only thing that matters is getting Hikaru in him again and quickly.

"Sorry, sir," he says. "But I am tired."

"Oh? You're tired? Is that why you and Lieutenant Sulu were both late getting back from lunch?"

Lunch. Pavel's mouth curves into a smile when he thinks about it. Oh, lunch had been so good. Hikaru fucked him so well and made him so full of his hot, wet seed, oh --

Before Pavel can overthink things, he gets up from his chair with a whine and dumps himself into Hikaru's lap. Hikaru clutches him needfully, as if he was suffering, too, being so far away from Pavel. He holds Pavel against him as Pavel writhes and purrs into Hikaru's ear, his smile stretching wider and his eyes falling shut.

"What the --" Kirk is making some noise. Who cares.

"Yeah, baby," Hikaru whispers as Pavel begins to properly hump Hikaru's chest, his cock growing stiff. "Yeah, oh, so pretty when you feel good --"

"'Kashka! Oh, so good, need you --" Pavel is licking Hikaru's face madly, trying to spur him into action, to make him put Pavel over the conn, tear his clothes away and put his big, thick cock deep inside Pavel's body, oh, he needs it --

"Oh, Jesus Christ!" Kirk shouts. "Spock, I thought we had sex pollen filters installed on the bridge after -- last time."

"We did, Captain. I check them daily for functionality per your instructions."

"Then wha -- what -- Spock, don't just stand there! Call McCoy!"

Pavel wishes Kirk would be quiet so he can concentrate on kissing his Hikaru, and swallowing down the throaty, pleasured noises Hikaru is making as he kneads Pavel's ass with both hands. He can feel the stares of the others and he knows that they're jealous, that they wish they had been claimed by someone as strong and virile as his Hikaru, who's going to fill Pavel with come until he overflows. Hikaru pulls Pavel's shirt off and whines with delight at the sight of Pavel's stiff nipples. He licks them and licks them and licks them, and oh, so good, Pavel might come in his pants just from this.

"What in the name of --"

That's the doctor's voice, but Pavel doesn't even open his eyes to acknowledge him, just throws his head back as he arches into the feeling of Hikaru bathing his nipples with that hot tongue and making sharp mph, mph noises as if he can hardly stand how good they taste.

"They just went crazy!" Kirk sounds panicked. Pavel giggles.

"Fucking -- sex pollen, again?"

"It can't be! Spock has the anti-sex pollen thingies turned on!"

"Jesus -- well. Here."

The doctor is coming toward them. Pavel whines in fear and sinks down to hide against Hikaru's chest. Hikaru's arms wind around Pavel and he glares at the doctor.

"Mine," he says, not the way he said it in bed, kind and soft. Now he sounds angry. Pavel whimpers and hides his face against Hikaru's neck.

"I'm not going to -- oh, for fuck's sake."

McCoy stabs something into Hikaru's neck, and Hikaru goes limp. Pavel screams, agony ripping through him, his body going stiff as if its been thrown into ice water. His Hikaru, the doctor hurt him --

"Ouch!" he manages to shriek before he passes out himself.

*

Pavel wakes up strapped to a bio bed. Panic shoots through him as he searches the room for Hikaru, but he's there, making pained sounds and straining against his own bonds, staring over at Pavel. McCoy is standing between them, staring down at a scanner and sighing.

"Never seen anything like it," he says, mumbling.

Pavel sobs, fighting his restraints, needing to get to Hikaru. This only seems to agitate Hikaru further, and he whines desperately, thrashing on his bio bed. He's so far away. Pavel is going to die.

"It doesn't affect the brain's pleasure centers like any sex pollen I've ever seen," McCoy says. "There's more to it than that -- oh hell, nurse, will you sedate them again?"

"I have an idea, actually, doctor," Nurse Chapel says.

"Let's hear it. I'm fresh out, and I can't even think straight with these two crying for each other like puppies."

The idea involves wheeling Pavel and Hikaru into a private examining room. They're released from their bonds, and Pavel immediately shoots off of his bed, panting with relief as Hikaru runs forward to pull him into his arms. Ohh, it feels so good, Hikaru's body pressed to his, it's paradise, and Pavel's frantic heartbeat finally begins to slow as they sink to the floor together, Hikaru's hands roaming all over Pavel's body. They lick each other's faces, rutting and purring, whimpering as they're encased in the comfort of being close. Though they're not using actual words, Pavel can interpret every one of Hikaru's soft, cooing noises: You're safe now, he says, Don't be scared. Dr. McCoy groans.

"Well, if this doesn't work, at least they'll enjoy themselves while we figure out a solution," he says. He throws something into the room -- lube, fantastic! The economy-sized bottle rolls over to a pile of pillows that have been arranged beside a basket of food, and Dr. McCoy slams the door shut. Pavel doesn't care if they're locked in here together forever. Hikaru is all he needs.

They fling their useless clothes away and crawl over to the pillows. There are blankets, too, and Pavel flops down onto them, spreading himself open for Hikaru with a smile. Hikaru kneels up over him and licks him, locking an arm around the small of Pavel's back. They continue speaking to each other in this purring, wordless language, Hikaru asking Pavel if he's ready to mate again, and Pavel's squeaks growing higher-pitched as he rubs himself against Hikaru, saying, Yes, yes, again, have me, take me, I'm yours.

After the initial excitement of being reunited, they slow down and fall into a routine: sex, food, sleep, the sex being the longest stage of this cycle. Pavel lies on his stomach or gets up onto his hands and knees and Hikaru takes him from behind, holding Pavel's body against his the whole time, giving him rough licks and little love bites. Pavel goes wild for this routine, sometimes coming two or three times before Hikaru finally unloads inside him. When Hikaru cuddles him afterward, inside the nest of pillows and blankets that they've arranged just so, Pavel feels like he'll evaporate into a mist of nothing but perfect happiness. Hikaru is so tender, his petting and cooing so soothing, and Pavel turns to jelly under his ministrations, a smile permanently stretched across his face as he sighs and licks at Hikaru in sleepy appreciation. He'll usually doze off for a few seconds before the food portion of the cycle, and Hikaru will wake him by gently placing a slice of fruit or a cracker against Pavel's bottom lip, making him giggle and open up for a snack.

Eventually, the sleeping portion of their cycle replaces the sex as the longest, but Pavel loves this, too, resting with Hikaru draped protectively over his back, the blankets circled around them and the air in the room warm and dense with the smell of their mating. Pavel dreams that the room is filled with the soft, fuzzy products of their love, creatures made of pure joy that nuzzle and cuddle around them.

He wakes up after a particularly long nap feeling strange, almost hungover, and rolls onto his back. Hikaru is awake, too, rubbing at his face and moaning.

"Wait," Hikaru says, looking down at Pavel. "What -- what just happened?"

"I don't know," Pavel looks around the room. They're in sick bay. He thought that had only been a dream, but -- oh, God. They didn't really dry hump each other at the conn, in front of everyone. They couldn't have.

"Are you two finally coming around?" McCoy barks, and they both look up at the observational window to see the doctor's stern face there. "I was just about to yank you out of here when you finally conked out and stayed out. Forty-two hours of nonstop sex is not healthy, goddammit, I don't care how much you enjoyed it."

"Doctor -- what happened to us?" Hikaru asks. He's pulling a blanket up over Pavel as he speaks, shielding him from the doctor's eyes. Pavel smiles to himself, still feeling the buzz of whatever made them go crazy at the back of his skull.

"Just -- get some clothes on, take a goddamn shower, and I'll explain," McCoy says. He sighs and unlocks the door, then makes himself scarce. Hikaru looks back to Pavel. He's blushing.

"I am so sorry," he says, pronouncing every word slowly. Pavel moans and pulls Hikaru down to him, cradling him against his chest.

"It is not your fault," Pavel says. "I am the one who mounted you on the bridge."

"Oh, God."

"Don't worry too much, Hikaru. Sex pollen happens to everyone."

It's true enough, but not everyone gets an actual sex-related syndrome named after them, portmanteau-style. The following afternoon, Pavel and Hikaru have to return to work just as McCoy is doing a ship-wide broadcast warning the crew about the dangers of Chulu Syndrome, which can be contracted from having sex within ten yards of Risan Tribbles, a particularly randy breed that practically coated the earth on the last planet Hikaru and Pavel visited during an away mission.

"Good to know you two had your mind on your work," Kirk says, but he winks as if he's proud of them. Pavel sinks into his seat in shame. He can't even look at Hikaru, the horrifying mental image of what went on in Hikaru's chair flashing through his mind every time he does. By the end of the day people are snickering and calling them tribble fetishists. Pavel has never been more glad to hide together in their room, under five blankets, Hikaru's warm breath on his face calming his frayed nerves.

"I remember all of it," Hikaru says. "It's like I was there, but I wasn't."

"Yes, such a strange sensation." Pavel sighs. "But -- Hikaru -- for all the embarrassment, I must admit. It was enjoyable. I was so sure that nothing mattered but having you near."

Hikaru laughs and kisses Pavel's nose, then licks it, which makes Pavel smile in the dark under the blankets.

"I kind of liked you as a tribble," he says, keeping his voice low, as if someone will hear him admit this. "You were so -- damn, you really wanted me in you. And I really wanted to be -- in there." He snorts with laughter and Pavel cracks up, punching his shoulder.

"Is not so different from reality," he says. "Food, sleep, sex with you. My basic needs."

"I'm just glad we didn't reproduce every time we did it," Hikaru says. "We would have had, like -- eighty children."

"Yes, but they would have been very cute, I think."

They fall asleep without sex, Pavel still sore from the marathon and Hikaru more interested in resting. Pavel dreams that he is a tribble, a tan, curly-haired little thing, and that Hikaru is, too, slightly larger with black fur. It's a bit of a disturbing dream, but when he wakes up and rolls against Hikaru's chest, seeking comfort, Hikaru strokes his curls and murmurs softly, sounding an awful lot like he's cooing, and Pavel doesn't mind at all.