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He won but it didn't feel right. It didn't help that his chin was stinging from the way Danny grabbed it and forced him to look onto Yuta cutting Mina's hair. He didn't need any medic—for once—and he made his way towards his backpack.
He didn't feel sore. He was just off.
He still waited by the locker room for him. He still had some kind of hope that Roddy was somewhere in the building still, that he didn't fully abandoned him tonight.
The rest of the roster that were after them came and went through the locker room, but they weren't Roddy. Neither was the trainers, or the security who warned him of his time, or even the cleaning crew who just swept around him. He was left until the lights finally groaned off, leaving him in darkness. He stayed around still, until he sees the glow of a flashlight passing through the halls. Any will to hide left him, and he lets himself get caught by the bright light. He must of looked worse than he thought to just be let out with a goodnight out the door along with his backpack.
In the cold air, with only the buildings around him, he finally let that unknown feeling wash over him.
He never expressed himself fully. That was always his problem. That's what drove Yuta away, what made Kris and Trent turn their back on him. That's why Chuck is not there by him, not even in production.
He didn't like that it was causing him problems again. So out in the open, where no one was there to see, he could express something.
Orange felt….he felt… He couldn't put a name on what he was feeling right now except that it was building in his chest whenever he thought about him. Months, he's been trying for months to get along with Roddy out of respect for Kyle, who wanted Roddy to not feel alone again and he gets it, he gets it all too well.
Mark and Ishii saved him from himself and though he tried pushing them away and not caring as much, eventually he got close to the two of them. Mark threw the word Conglomeration and next thing you know, Willow then Hologram and others started joining in even for a moment. Kyle sneaked in along with Mark and Orange let himself become comfortable again to be part of a team, one that didn't leave him when he was himself.
And then Adam Cole—Kyle's friend, Roddy's everything, Orange's strange frenemy—made the vaguest hints of hanging his boots with gritted teeth and his positivity cracking with sorrow at All In. Just like that, it was now Kyle and Roddy and Roddy didn't trust easily. Kyle didn't either, but he had put enough faith in the little group that formed to bring Roddy along.
It didn't seemed like enough. Today just proved that all together. Orange didn't want to try anymore.
The most effort he could do now was swipe for an Uber towards the airport, towards Australia. The driver didn't talk to him much, which did not give him the relief he was looking for. Instead, it made that off feeling in his chest grow bitter and warm. Every few minutes, he checked his phone to make sure he was going towards the right place and leaned over his backpack in his lap. He stared at the window, watching the buildings turn into skylines and the lights grew taller until it towered over the road.
The stars were actually out tonight. They followed him from the car until he got underneath the cover of the airport. The off feeling still lingered as he walked through the doors and around to kill time.
He didn't expect to find the cause of it at the makeshift bar nearby. He gets eyes on him, shocked before it shifted to a familiar look. Orange let himself sit a chair over, keeping that distance that Roddy decided to make.
He had the same distrust like Trent did. Same annoyed look too. It softened with everyone else, and completely melts away when Kyle was near. It lingered whenever Orange was around, never changing. Maybe he'll bring out a wrench out next to wack in the back of his head to finish him off next, just like his old friend did.
He'll just choose another weapon for now. "Screwdriver, please." He tells the bartender.
When they walk away, he made his legs anchor himself to the chair instead of moving. He rested his head against his hands, looking everywhere but at the guy next to him, like he probably wanted. (He didn't see that same guy's quick motion to move before stopping himself.) Instead, he focused on watching his drink being made.
The blunt nails he had bites a bit into his cheeks, bringing that same stinging he felt earlier. He felt something else other than off now: it was making everything that happen to finally settle in his mind and it ran hot. He remembers this feeling all too well. It made a weapon he wasn't used to not feel heavy in his hand. It had people looking at him in fear, backing away from him instead of laughing or scoffing.
Orange's stomach turned, just when things moved around him: the screwdriver placed in front of him and a person sitting right in the empty spot. Both were silent in their movement, never addressing him fully. He decides to acknowledge the drink first, taking it and sipping it slowly. The juice did not cover the burn in the back of his throat, but he was halfway through it. He let his eyes close, enjoying the last moment of something that played like peace. No cameras or other members to be by his side this time.
Whatever comes next was all on him.
"Now you're here." No need to hide what he finally recognized as some kind of bitterness from his own mouth that mixes with the tangy orange juice if only for a little bit.
"What is that supposed to mean?" He could just sink his teeth in Roddy's tone, the same kind of burn that lingered in his body as he finally made himself turn away from his drink.
"I. Waited." Orange said slowly, his hands now on the top of his jeans. "In the ring, near the locker rooms, in the building until the lights finally shut itself off—"
"So you stayed, what's new?" Roddy's voice rose but it wasn't as loud as Orange know it could be. "You want me to give you a big old hug for that like everyone else does?"
"No," His legs squeezed tighter against the legs of the chair before saying it louder. "no, but I though you would at least tell me what went wrong tonight. You would for Kyle…" He mumbles out and apparently that was wrong to say.
"But he's not here, is he?" Orange's stomach swoops. "He's hurt because he gave his all for you and the Conglomeration when Mox and his crew was on our backs every week. I can understand about doing it for the others but you…" Roddy growled as finally, finally, Orange decides to chance it and look away from his drink and met that disdain that looked harsher. "I still don't get how you get everyone to fall over you by doing…nothing."
We fought for him, we protected him and he gave us nothing! He flinches. Something in him stirs but all he can do is stare right back at the other man through his glasses. Everything from today was in his shoulders, curling up into his stomach and that bitterness was trying to coat his tongue. Yet Roddy was ignoring all of that, saying something else about him and…
He thought he was doing better. He was trying, he didn't complain about the stinging and the way he fell into bed without caring if he smashed his glasses in. He'd put up with the coldness that felt all too familiar, that fear that he thought he finally chased away this year. He thought he wasn't worried about someone he cared about hurting him again but—
"…did they even put up with you?" Did he even care?
Apparently not.
"I see why Trent—"
His hand slammed onto the bar, hitting something wet and stinging. It was interesting how they both tensed up. Chairs that were next to them loudly slid away. The bartender just gave a quick look at the two before they went back to their job.
His hand was stinging but he'll ignore it for now, just like he's been doing. "Alright. I get it. You don't have to bring him up to say that you hate me." The anger that's been building through was coming through whether he liked it or not.
"I didn't say—"
"Then what do you feel about me?" He just wanted this to finally go away. "What did I do wrong to you, what else can I do to finally just get you off my back? We can talk, I can talk if you didn't know, I just—" That stinging hand went through his hair, already messed up and unslicked from the ring, and the anger was just still there. "What else do you want from me?"
"Fuck." Now it was Roddy that looked away and towards the bar. "I…fuck." The other man's tongue ran through his teeth and Roddy's finally softened that look of his but he didn't. Care.
Anger was something that everyone has to deal with. It made Roddy's strikes harder, his voice becoming venom. It was something that Kyle wasn't afraid of facing as he took that wrench away from Orange as he stared at his old friend laid out in front of him.
It didn't agree with Orange very well. His shoulders shook with the leftover rush he had, the citrus trying to come back up in his throat. He wanted to get rid of it all together. The speakers above him crackle before giving out a number for a flight that wasn't his.
He grabs his bag and walks away like it was.
He didn't even bother looking for him after Australia. He wasn't surprised that he didn't show up to tag this week either. He was more concerned with the way Ishii was holding onto his ribs when they were still in the back. The doctors said it might have pulled a bit, but he was fine otherwise. That was enough for Ishii to brush him off—gently, with a thumbs up that meant he was fine from there—and for Orange to start gathering his stuff and head off again.
The airport gave him time to walk around again. They have similar things in almost every one: food places, merch stores of the city, music that crackles in between calls.
And a bar. He didn't want anything strong today though. He orders some orange juice and waits for his flight.
Just when the citrus hits the back of his throat, his phone started to buzz in his pocket. He makes a noise before slowly pulling it out and seeing whoever was calling him right about now. Might be Chuck or even Kris.
Roderick Strong was not the name he was expecting. He was tempted to not answer it.
But he just didn't care. He swiped at the green and put it close to his ear. He didn't say anything but he gave a grunt.
"Orange." That was his name, calm sounding and a bit friendly.
He still taste the bitterness. "Roderick."
"You and Ishii did pretty good out there." It didn't feel like a compliment.
"Yeah." He gets a sigh on the other side.
"…I crossed a line, didn't I?" He wanted to not feel off again. But that's how he got here in the first place?
He ran his hand, not stinging today, through his hair. "Yeah, you did." Orange firmly said. He waited for that feeling to come.
Instead, Roddy's voice picked up instead. "I…I didn't mean…I didn't mean some of that, honest. Just… give me another week, alright? Then we'll talk, about everything." Roddy was honest. That was something that was he quickly noticed and that was a rare thing to find, especially where they work.
It was hard to doubt what he was saying. Orange gave out his own sigh, letting that off feeling that was trying to sneak on him get away from him. "Alright." He agrees, then, "In person, right?"
"Of course in person!"
"Just asking."