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She ran, Tachyon ran like her life depended on it, her legs ached from weeks of not using them to their full extent — it burned, but it still felt amazing… she felt free— she felt alive… After so long, she finally felt like herself, she felt completely and utterly free, such as weird thing to say, but it felt true… it felt real— she didn't have to be on the sidelines anymore, not… not having to look at something she thought she'll never be able to do again, being able to do something without the fear, controlling her… but, finally— after so long… she ran— she felt tears flow from her, but she didn't care…
She felt free— so incredibly free, that she just kept running, faster, harder— running to feel something, running, because she could— because she wanted to… because she could, no formulas on how she can get less air resistance, better traction— no… she just ran, just for her— and… and it felt amazing. She could already imagine herself running with Danstu, with Cafe, and with Pokke, run side-by-side with them, together, not just watch them on the side…
It sounded like a dream come true….
But… that's not what's gonna to happen, is it?— that won't happen— it's not going to happen… she's not getting a happy ending, will she— she's never going to be able to run with them… it was just a dream… A hopeless… pathetic dream…. that'll never come true.
She didn't know what went wrong… how it went wrong, so horribly, horribly wrong, but she fell, she fell hard onto the pavement— she felt her arms scraping against the floor, it burned… and her legs— she felt her legs crash onto the solid ground, she felt them break underneath her, she felt something split open… she didn't know… But she was helpless to all of it— she felt her body fall apart, and all she could was feel it…
She felt her hope and happiness shatter into millions of pieces, just like her body… and she could do nothing to stop it… it hurt, and she could do nothing….
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She didn't feel anything, she opened her eyes, she couldn't see anything, all around her, pure emptyness, she couldn't feel anything, but at the same time… The emptiness, felt cold... it shouldn't feel cold. This isn't what was supposed to happen-- it's wrong, this is all wrong, everything is wrong. she did what she was supposed to. she followed her plan, the exact process of it. This isn't fair, it's just not, she was supposed to get better, she was supposed to be able to run again, not make it so she could barely feel anything, she felt it-- she really felt that... that spark, back when she saw Pokke, running, running without care, without worry, she wanted that again, she wanted to run again, she wanted to feel that again, and-- and she thought she could, she felt it heal, she could walk without it hurting. So what went wrong, was she careless? that couldn't have been it, she always knew what was going to happen, she always planned for... for it. Or was it just that she was just always at a disadvantage... too weak to fully use her legs— stuck in a body, forever broken, and yet... her mind bursting with thousands of possibilities, all so close that she can almost see them, almost reach then, but-- she couldn't, so was her place just to observe? all she could do is watch as others take her place, leave her behind, continue to grow and get faster... All while she keeps getting worse, keeps slowing down, keeps getting dimmer, and dimmer. Was that her purpose? In a body, now so permanently broken— she knows that she can't even run even if she wanted to.... she doesn't even know if she'll be able to walk…
But what's next… is she stuck here? will she wake up? is she even asleep?… she's scared— she doesn't know what to do… Tachyon is scared and she doesn't know what's next…. or if there's even something for her…