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He’s with her again. They’re in a part of the Circus Jack’s never seen before – tucked away from the others, colors strangely dull. It’s like the room is trying its hardest to be comforting. It’s not working. He doesn’t tell her.
The Jester is sitting on the ground, he’s laid down with his head in her lap. His gangly limbs are all curled up, somewhat like a dog. She’s petting him. Slowly, her hand runs over his head and down his ears. Her touch is cold and stiff but he still leans into it. His cheek is pressed against her thigh and he’s sure she can feel how warm he is.
“You did good today.” The Jester praises. Jack swallows thickly, nodding a little. He doesn’t feel good. He still remembers the feeling of Jangle’s mask – her head – in his hands, so brittle, so breakable. He almost snapped it. His fingers still twitch with the urge to.
Jack’s stomach churns.
“Thanks.”
The Jester hums, and he can hear the satisfied smile in it. He hates not being able to see her face. He wants to know where she’s looking. He hopes it’s not at him. He hates when she stares at him. Uncomfortable in all senses of the word, Jack shifts to try and quell a cramp in his leg. Her hand lands softly on his shoulder and he goes instantly still. He’s terrified, for a moment, that she’s upset with him, before she begins to trace a finger across his clavicle.
The Jester’s voice is strangely soft when she asks, “Have you figured out the censors are gone yet?”
Jack is quiet. He doesn’t know how to respond. Caine was easy to placate but she… she was irritable. Erratic. Jack could use one wrong word and she’d snap at him. He worries about it whenever he’s near her. “...Yes.” He replies cautiously. As soon as it leaves his mouth it feels like the wrong thing to say. Everything feels like the wrong thing to say.
“Exploited it yet?”
Jack hesitates again. “Yes.”
There’s an agonizing couple moments of quiet. Absolute quiet. Jack’s anxieties crawl under his skin. Then, The Jester chuckles. The petting resumes and he finds that he’s missed it despite himself. “I knew you would. Don’t worry, I disabled it on purpose.” – He tries his best not to sigh too loudly – “Have you had sex?”
“No.”
“Hm.” Her petting stops again.
The Jester’s hand is on his hip. Jack is paralyzed with fear. Every muscle in his body tenses at once. His breath hitches.
Her touch comes back to his head once more. “Good. They wouldn’t deserve that from you, anyway.” She purrs, both clinical and malicious. His body relaxes but he’s sick again. He wants to get off the floor more than ever. He wants to run away from her. But that would make her mad. Tears sting the corners of his eyes. Jack prays she doesn’t notice.
“Yeah.” He mutters airlessly.
The Jester leans down to kiss the side of his head. He blushes and hates it. “Yeah.” She parrots. He hears the self-satisfied smile again. “I like having these talks with you, Jack.”
Jack curls up further. His voice shakes. “Me too.”