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They stumbled over each other as they tried to reach his hotel room door. Lee’s cologne was filling up Richard’s nose, making him more clumsy than usual, and he fumbled in his pockets, trying to get his key. Lee nearly fell on top of him, and he steadied himself with a hand beside the door, pulling away slightly, and it was far too embarrassing to admit out loud how much his skin burned to touch Lee again.
“I’m not always this clumsy,” Lee laughed quietly. He leaned in and brushed his lips over Richard’s cheek, and it was such a casual kiss that Richard couldn’t help but chase it again, for their lips to meet. To taste Lee like he wanted to do for so long, that he hadn’t had a chance to until today when both of them managed by some serendipity to find words that suited each other.
But he held himself back. There were always cameras, especially in hotel hallways.
“I know,” he murmured. I’ve watched you enough to know how graceful you are, he almost said, but he swallowed the words because frankly they might seem a little bit too creepy, even though he knew that Lee had most likely been watching him as well.
Lee’s smile was wide, brightening up the whole of his face, and Richard loved that smile. Loved the way the lines at the side of his face crinkled upwards, and Richard couldn’t help but tip his head upwards, kissing against the soft skin.
(Screw those cameras.)
His fingers finally found the key, and he turned the lock and finally, finally they were his room. He turned around and pressed Lee to the door, slamming it shut. Their foreheads touched, breaths curling against each other’s skin, before he made the final move and allowed their lips to meet again. Lee’s mouth opened beneath his own, and Richard breathed in, drinking in his scent, his taste, and he made a small sound at the base of his throat.
“I’ve been thinking about this for a little bit too long to be healthy,” Lee gave a nervous laugh, his voice half-muffled by Richard’s lips. “Gave me wet dreams of the kind I haven’t had since I was a teenager, really.” His fingers stroked the back of Richard’s neck, and Richard wanted so badly to ask what it was, to beg Lee to not leave him in suspense, but Lee’s hand slid into his hair and words died in his throat.
“Do you know what I’ve done for the past weeks, Rich?” Lee’s shoulders shook, almost laughing. “Aside from working, I mean.”
Richard shook his head. He could feel Lee smile against his skin.
“I would watch you in the day and dream of you fucking me at night.”
His breath stopped in his throat. Richard blinked, stepping back, and he reached out and curved his fingers over Lee’s jaw, stroking against the permanent stubble that roughened the smooth skin whenever Lee wasn’t playing an Elf.
“I don’t-” he licked his lips, swallowing. “I don’t do that very often.”
Lee cocked his head to the side, and his nervousness was well-hidden, but Richard had watched him for too long to not notice it. “What, have sex with men?”
“No, well, not really- I mean, I don’t do that often, I mean-” Richard ducked his head, taking a deep breath. “I mean- I don’t top often.”
Richard was so focused on staring at an indeterminate spot on the wall that he was taken by complete surprise when Lee’s hand moved downwards, nails scraping Richard’s shirt before fingers curled around his half-hard cock. Richard gasped, thrusting forward.
“I’m sure you’ll do fine,” Lee grinned.
I don’t want to disappoint you, Richard almost said. He rarely took the lead with these things, even with women; he preferred to wait until they came to him, until they showed him that what they wanted was what he wanted. There were too many times when Richard was distinctly, belatedly aware that he had missed his chances because he waited for far too long, but feeling disappointment was always so much easier than seeing it in someone else’s eyes.
But Lee was looking at him, his gaze bright and glittering, and Richard leaned in and kissed him again. This time he didn’t wait until Lee’s mouth opened to him, instead nipping at the bottom lip, his thumb rubbing against Lee’s nipple through his shirt until Lee gasped, until his mouth opened because Richard wanted it to, and he darted his tongue instead and touched every single corner of Lee’s mouth that he could reach.
This was what Lee wanted, and Lee had made the first move and told Richard what he wanted. It was something Richard could give; something he wanted more than anything to take because Lee felt so pliable, so malleable in his arms as Richard pushed him back against the door, using the slight advantage he had in girth to plaster their bodies together until he could feel Lee’s thrumming heart against his own chest.
“Okay,” Richard opened his eyes (he didn’t even realise that he closed them). He looked at Lee for a long moment, trailing his fingers through the short strands of his hair. “You’ll have to tell me if- if I do anything wrong.”
“Well, I don’t think you can,” Lee said, and his smile was made obscene by how swollen and red his lips were from their kiss. “If you can’t find the right hole, I’ll lead you to it, I promise.”
Richard choked and could feel himself starting to blush. Lee was always disarming when he said something like this and it always took Richard by surprise no matter how many times he did it. It just didn’t seem natural that a man with such a sweet smile and gentle eyes could make such filth come so easily out of his mouth.
He shook his head hard, but before he could even think of a reply, Lee grabbed hold of his wrist and was tugging him to the bedroom. Richard looked at him through his lashes and saw the tension wound all over Lee’s shoulders, watched as he almost trembled with every rapid step he took. Lee wanted him, and the words he said wasn’t something to make Richard do what he wanted – it was simply the truth. Heat shot down Richard’s spine, and he practically fell forward, hands clenching onto Lee’s shoulders as he slammed him against the bedroom wall, hard enough to make the nondescript landscape paintings shake.
“You need to stop talking like that,” he said, and was surprised at how desperate his voice sounded.
“What are you going to do to shut me up? Kiss me?” Lee grinned, and he pecked him on the lips, the tease in his voice twining around Richard’s spine and sending a shot of heat downwards. “That’s not a deterrent, Rich; it’s a reward.”
Richard stared at him, speechless and flushed, wondering how on Earth he could take the lead when everything Lee did seemed to arouse him until his hands and knees felt weak and he could barely breathe.
“C’mon,” Lee said. “Let’s get to bed.”
He didn’t need to be told twice. Stepping away from the wall, Richard pulled Lee with him, shifting the two of them around until he could push Lee towards the bed. Step by step they took, an arrhythmic dance that ended when Lee bent his knees and fell backwards, and Richard crawled over him, the mattress sinking underneath their combined weight. Lee’s eyes were blue-grey and the heat of his skin was so near, and Richard took a long, deep breath. He couldn’t tell the kind of cologne Lee used, only knew that he hated it at the moment because it masked the scent of Lee himself.
Lee shifted on the bed, spreading his legs around Richard’s hips. He tipped his head back, allowing Richard to pull open his shirt, tugging his collar away to reveal freckles dotting his shoulders. Richard had noticed them the very first time they changed together in the shared locker room back in the Wellington studio, and he had wanted to see if they tasted different since then. Keeping his eyes to Lee’s, he dipped his head down, teeth scraping against skin before he licked a long line from Lee’s collarbone to his Adam’s apple.
His cock was hard, pressing against the constraining zip of his slacks, but Richard ignored it. Salt of sweat, and something else he couldn’t name, and Richard chased the taste, licking again, wanted to have it on his tongue until he could find the words that could describe this.
But there was something more important than words. Eventually he pulled himself away, and found himself relishing in the small noise that Lee gave him, a deep sound that came from the very base of his throat.
“I hate to break the mood,” Richard said, licking his lips. “But I don’t have condoms.”
It would kill him, he thought, to have those things and be reminded every night of what he didn’t have, what he never thought he could have. Now he regretted his fear, his uncertainty, because his desires were made full form in Lee’s body underneath his, and he couldn’t take him.
Lee grinned at him. He nudged at Richard, pushing him away before he dug his fingers into his pants. Richard watched, slightly wide-eyed, as Lee pulled out his wallet from his pants and withdraw a whole strip of condoms from the back.
“Confident, aren’t you?” He couldn’t help but tease.
“More like hopeful,” Lee shot back. He pushed at Richard’s shoulders again, placing the condoms in his mouth. “Get on your back, you. I want to try something.”
“You’re damned bossy for someone who wants to be fucked,” Richard said, and he laughed nervously at himself even as he obeyed. His back hit the bed, and Lee was looming over him, long body covering Richard’s own almost entirely – and wasn’t that completely rare, wasn’t that something Richard had never expected to have? That he could find someone who equalled him in every way possible, down to the shape of their bodies.
Richard lifted his eyes, and Lee was tearing one piece of silver foil from the others, spitting it onto the mattress while tossing the rest of the strip on the ground. He inhaled, air scratching against the base of his throat when he felt Lee’s breath on his crotch, sinking through the layers of cloth as if they weren’t there.
“Like I was saying before you interrupted me with your cute blushing,” Lee said, and he was still smiling. “I’ve dreamed of this. Dreamed of having your cock in my hand, in my mouth. Dreamed of feeling you, tasting you.” His hands weren’t idle while he talked – Richard felt the cool air of the room ghost across bared skin, and he jerked his hips upwards, arching up as much as he could.
“You have a filthy mouth,” Richard panted.
“You haven’t seen the least of it yet,” Lee said, and Richard could hear the slight tremor of nervousness in his voice, well-hidden by cockiness. He reached down, fingers carding through Lee’s hair, and he wanted more than anything to pull Lee up, to kiss him over and over until they tired of each other’s tastes. But that wouldn’t happen, he thought, and instead dropped back against the sheets, spreading his legs.
“Show me then.”
Lee flashed him another smile before he tore open the condom wrapper. He ducked his head down and did something that Richard couldn’t see, but he didn’t need to because he could feel it – heat, breath, and the familiar slide of latex down sensitive skin. But never like this, never once like this, and Richard’s fingers nearly tore the sheets apart trying to keep from bucking upwards as Lee took him into his mouth, all the way to the hilt until he could feel tiny gusts of breath against the very insides of his thighs.
Oh Christ. If Richard was only half-hard before, the problem was completely solved now. He squeezed his eyes shut, counting to ten in English, then in Russian, then in French, and when he opened his eyes he saw Lee’s smug grin spread around his own cock and he had to shut them again.
“You’re trying to kill me,” he panted, heels digging into the mattress as he felt Lee pull backwards.
“Nah,” Lee said, and his amusement and pride was audible. “I won’t get any fun with a corpse, you know.”
It was so unfair that Lee could still sound so calm when Richard was so close to going to pieces that he surged upwards, grabbing onto Lee’s lapels blindly before he crashed their lips together. Lee’s mouth tasted plasticky, and Richard licked every corner, swiping away the taste until he could found Lee’s own again.
“Get your clothes off,” he demanded.
“Now who is being bossy?” Lee raised his eyebrow. But he shrugged off his jacket immediately, fingers already unbuttoning his shirt. Richard tucked it out, sliding his fingers underneath white cloth, feeling the warmth of Lee’s skin.
“I want to take it slow eventually, you know,” he said, keeping his voice low by instinct. Lee’s skin was so smooth beneath his touch, and Richard couldn’t help but be gentle even though arousal was thrumming through his veins. “I want to kiss every inch of you, find every sensitive spot…” He flicked his thumb over Lee’s nipple, feeling more than hearing his gasp even as Lee fumbled with his cuffs.
“Do you want to do this again?” Lee asked, and there was a note in his voice that made Richard snap his head up.
“Yeah,” he whispered. “Of course I do.”
Lee’s slow-blooming smile was beautiful to see, and Richard couldn’t help but return it. He leaned forward, kissing those lips that curved so sweetly for him, and Lee tilted his head back, an open invitation that Richard wasn’t foolish enough not to take. He moved down, stubble scraping the skin of Lee’s throat even as he pulled the shirt off of him.
“But we’re not going to talk about that now, I think,” he said.
“Not now,” Lee agreed.
Richard looked up, and he saw only fire in Lee’s eyes. He nodded wordlessly, pulling himself away to grope for the nightstand. At the corner of his eyes, he watched a pair of pants and underwear fly over the edge of the bed. Desperation made him nearly pull the top drawer out almost completely, but he found the lube and held the bottle in his hand.
Lee raised an eyebrow, and Richard laughed.
“There’s no guy on Earth who doesn’t carry some form of lube with him, you know,” he answered the unspoken question.
“Oh, I can think of a few,” Lee drawled. “I lived in Texas for quite a while.”
It was easy like this; it was always easy with Lee, filled with laughter and conversation. But Richard splayed his hand on Lee’s chest, feeling the rhythmic thumpthumpthump of his heart, and he quirked a nervous smile.
“Will you show me what you want me to do?” He took Lee’s hand, pressing a soft kiss on the tips of the fingers. “I wasn’t kidding when I said I don’t do this a lot.”
Lee’s gaze was heavy on his own, but there was no judgment in those blue-grey eyes, and he nodded. Without speaking, he closed his hand around Richard’s, sliding the bottle of lube from his fingers and popping the top open.
“Move back a little?”
Richard did. He stretched his hands up until he could feel the headboard with the tips of his fingers before h pushed himself the bed, skin sliding against cotton sheets until shoulders hit wood with a thud. Fingers flexed, but Richard didn’t know what to do with his hands. He wanted to touch, but he asked Lee to show him – and there was a look in Lee’s eyes that warned him not to. The anticipation in the air flared back to life, lightning dancing across his skin, and Richard nodded without knowing why.
Nails dug into the wood, and he held his breath.
“Watch me,” Lee said, and Richard shivered because, really, he couldn’t do otherwise.
Lee tossed his head back, his lips curving into a razor-sharp smile before he straddled Richard’s hips. He tipped the lube bottle back, and Richard bit down on the inside of his cheek. There was something absolutely indecent about the way the colourless liquid poured over Lee’s fingers, the way Lee rubbed them together while keeping his eyes on Richard.
Then Lee arched backwards, reaching, and Richard couldn’t breathe.
“This is what I do when I’m alone, Rich,” Lee’s words were mangled by his moan. “Put my fingers inside myself and pretend that they’re yours.”
Richard was moving even before his brain caught up with his body. A hand scrabbled for the bottle of lube, the other grabbing Lee by the back of his head. He crashed their lips together, teeth clacking hard and nearly tearing lips, but Richard didn’t care because he wanted to breathe those words in, draw them in until they sank into him and he could never forget them. He trembled, clumsier than before, and cold lube spilled over his sheets as he dropped the bottle.
“You don’t have to pretend,” he rasped against Lee’s mouth. “You don’t ever have to pretend.”
He slid a finger inside Lee, prying him open alongside his own, and he grinned when Lee trembled, when he cried out and jerked towards Richard, his nipples scraping against Richard’s shirt, and Richard suddenly realised that he was still fully clothed, dressed prim and proper while Lee was completely naked and at his mercy.
The rush of power down his spine made him heady. Richard was never like this; rarely did he relish in holding his strength and power over someone else. But it was something in Lee’s voice, in his every movement, that made Richard forget all anxieties; that dragged something primal out of the very depth of his being and made him base.
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Lee murmured, and Richard looked at him, and there was uncertainty in Lee’s eyes, fear that turned his shaking into something else.
Richard twisted his finger hard, feeling Lee’s slide alongside his in the obscene heat and tightness of Lee’s body. He watched as pleasure and arousal chased the uncertainty away. They shouldn’t make promises to each other, he knew. Not when they were who they were; not when they were like this, minds addled by desire and heat. But Richard wanted to, wanted with a fierceness that made his chest ache.
A growl ripped itself out of his throat. “I’ll try my best,” he tried to say, and he stopped any further words with another finger pushing into Lee, trapping Lee’s slimmer one between his own and curling all three, pressing deep inside, searching, finding, somehow feeling like a conqueror looking at lands that were finally – finally – his.
Lee cried out, tearing his mouth away from Richard as he threw his head back. His bared throat, pale and trembling, was too much a temptation, and Richard took it, scraped his teeth hard against the skin until he could feel the pulse beating hard against his lips.
“Is this enough?” he asked, and he could barely believe that he had coherence left to form words.
Lee made a sound – a deep, desperate little thing – and Richard bit down on the thin skin right at the juncture between shoulder and neck. He felt Lee draw his finger out, felt Lee’s body clench tight around his own, and he couldn’t help but tease, pushing in as much as he could go, thumb tracing the trembling edge of Lee’s entrance. Lee jerked against him, his voice muffled in Richard’s shoulder, and Richard could feel Lee’s precome soaking through the thin cloth of his own shirt.
“I’m usually not like this,” Richard tried to say.
“I like you like this,” Lee shot back, voice steady but his hands were trembling as they pushed at Richard’s shoulders. “Don’t move, alright? Don’t move.”
Richard wanted to. His body ached to shove Lee down onto the bed, to pull those long legs open and take what was offered so freely. But he squeezed his eyes close and nodded, hands digging into the sheets to stop himself from moving.
There was heat on his cock, Lee’s hand dragging from tip to base, and Richard’s groan echoed around him, making the air heavy with arousal and need.
“Look at me.”
Forcing his eyes open, Richard opened. He watched as Lee spread his legs even wider around Richard’s still-clothed hips; watched the hint of tongue at the corner of Lee’s mouth as he held Richard still with a hand at the base of his cock; watched as Lee raised himself up before he sank down. Then Richard couldn’t watch anymore because there was heat and clenching tightness and everything he never thought he wanted, squeezing around his cock so hard that it seemed to drag every single breath he owned out of his lungs.
Lee’s name escaped him in a strangled moan, and Richard’s fingers dug even harder into the sheets. He heard Lee laugh, a shaky little thing, and Richard’s head thudded hard against the headboard. His eyes were blurry, but nothing could stop him from looking as Lee pushed himself up before slamming down again, his body swallowing Richard’s cock to the hilt. Lee fell forward, his pants hot and wet against Richard’s shoulder, soaking the collar of his shirt with his want.
Richard shook. His hands left the bedsheets, crawling up Lee’s chest, fingers finding Lee’s nipples without his mind’s help. He twisted them hard, watched as Lee gasped, felt his insides clench hard with every pinch, and he fought to breathe.
“Can I move now?” It took almost too much willpower for him to ask.
Lee made a sound, something that sounded assenting, and Richard felt his control break like the Gordian knot cut into half inside his chest. He lunged forward, pushing Lee flat onto his back, and Lee gasped, twisted in his grip, but Richard held him down, pushed him against the mattress. Lee’s lips parted, desperate little pants escaping them, and Richard took his mouth even as his took his body, drawing back and slamming in, keeping his gaze on Lee’s eyes as he watched his control shatter into pieces under Richard’s hands, Richard’s cock.
And he relished in it, drowned in every gasp he drew out of Lee’s body. He knew he shouldn’t, but the time for ‘shoulds’ and ‘should nots’ had long past. Lee had been showing him what he wanted the whole night, and Richard would only be a fool to not give it, to not take. His body trembled with each thrust, and he felt his shirt tear open beneath Lee’s hands, felt Lee’s teeth on his skin.
He could barely recognise the wrenching growl that ripped itself past his lips as belonging to himself.
It was instinct, only instinct, and Richard slammed into Lee’s body, forced him open with every thrust and felt Lee’s want carved inside his body with every moan, every gasp, every pant. His hands stroked down Lee’s sides, dipping into his ribs, holding on so tightly to his hips that he was sure that he would leave bruises – but that only made him harder, filled his head that Lee wouldn’t be able to walk away from this without thinking about Richard every time he moved, every time he looked at himself.
“You’re ruining me,” he gasped. “Utterly ruining me.”
Lee didn’t answer in words. He arched back, throwing himself upwards, his arms raised above his head as if to cover his face. But Richard was faster, pinning his wrists down, pulling them away until he saw every shift, every change in expression Lee made, and gloried that he was the one who caused it. Lee stared up at him, eyes swallowed wholly by the black of his pupils, and his legs spread even further, clenching around Richard’s hips and thrusting hard back at him, drawing Richard even deeper inside himself until Richard felt like he was drowning.
They couldn’t last. No matter how much Richard wanted it to, it couldn’t last. He could feel himself approaching the edge, could feel Lee tethering as he writhed beneath Richard’s body. Richard shifted, dragged Lee’s arms high above his head before he grabbed hold of both wrists with one hand. He pinned Lee down hard with his entire body, pressed down and shoved in, and his freed hand dragged downwards, nails raising red lines on Lee’s chest before he wrapped his hand around his cock.
Come for me, he wanted to say, but his voice failed him. He could only show it, closing his hand around the tip of Lee’s cock, and every thrust he made pushed Lee harder into the tight circle of his fist.
Lee’s hands dug into Richard’s hair, dragging him down, crashing their lips together. They no longer had the minds left to kiss, but Richard dragged Lee’s breath into his lungs, felt the heat burn him in the inside. Lee thrust up hard, erratic.
“So close, so close,” Lee gasped, nails dragging down Richard’s neck. “So close- God- Rich-”
Richard gritted his teeth, slanted his mouth and pressed harder against Lee’s, took those words in. His fingers twisted on Lee’s cock, and he slammed in hard, angling his hips perfectly.
Come for me.
Lee fell apart. He curled into himself, legs snapping around Richard’s hips, pulling him in deep. His hips thrust upwards, into Richard’s hands, and Richard felt him shake all over, felt Lee’s breath hot against his cheek, his lips, Lee’s hands dragging down his back.
“Richard.”
Too much, far too much, and Richard ducked his head down, buried his face into Lee’s neck, pressed his lips to that thundering pulse as Lee came hard. Richard’s cock was buried in volcanic heat, in tightness that made it impossible to breathe. He made a strangled cry, a mangled version of Lee’s name, and when he came he was blinded by white – but it didn’t matter, because Lee’s breathing was in his ear, his scent in his nose, and Richard was surrounded by him as much as he could be.
Moments later, Richard tried to pull himself off of Lee, to pull out, but Lee wrapped his arms and legs around him like a particularly large octopus and held on. Richard laughed breathlessly, his fingers dragging down Lee’s side, feeling Lee’s chest expand and contract with his rapid breaths.
“My clothes are ruined,” he said.
“It’s your room, and I’m sure you have more,” Lee pointed out.
Slowly, Lee let go and Richard pulled himself up. They were still joined, but it seemed to matter very little, like the way Richard’s shirt was stuck onto his skin by Lee’s come seemed to mean nothing, because he was caught by Lee’s eyes.
He opened his mouth to speak, to repeat all the things he voiced just moments ago, but Lee pressed a finger onto his lips.
“Later,” he whispered. “We can talk later, okay? I just want you like this right now.”
But what if I want something else, Richard thought, but he knew the words were too foolish to voice. He could already see the answers in Lee’s eyes, in his soft smile. Richard nodded, leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to the creases at the side.
“Later,” he said, and Lee’s mouth on his own was a promise.
End