Chapter Text
It hurt to land on the ground again, the ankle high blood spilling out from the corpse showing the red-tinted reflection of Vessel's face, splattered in blood that was mostly their own. They just now realised how much everything hurt again, the adrenaline must have drowned some of it out. They wished that it hadn't. They wish that they hadn't been shown the smallest bit of hope for something they knew was unattainable.
Everything was pain, it had always been that way, for every being that Abyssal created. She threw every 'failed' vessel into a pile of mangled corpses to rot if she saw anything less than perfect. It didn't matter that they were seconds old, she still killed them, it didn't matter that they could feel and think, she still killed them. And their pain, the pain of the hundreds of thousands of deaths prior to it would be passed on to the next vessel, and to the next, and to the next. To prevent anyone else from inheriting this immeasurable accumulating agony, she had to die. There was no other choice.
The pain was growing again, or would it be more accurate to say that it hadn't stopped and their body was just now processing it? They didn't have an answer, not like it mattered. But if it were still getting larger in the way they had grown to expect, what was the cause..?
Right, the pile. The half-decayed pile of torn up flesh and viscera that all the 'failures' were supposed to be apart of. It was utterly revolting, not only that a god would be heartless enough to do this, but that she didn't even put them out of their misery before discarding them. Should they do it then, should they end their suffering..? Or would that make them no different than Abyssal, killing the innocent without even giving them a chance at life? Would it be worse still to stand here instead of helping them? They didn't know, in all honesty they never even expected to get this far, they weren't supposed to survive this long.
Those who were thrown in that pile all deserved better, they should have been able to live like the 'normal Steves' Vessel had read about, they should have been able to make friends, they should have been able to be happy. She brought them into this world and ruthlessly killed them in the name of 'perfection' and her own greed. Vessel didn't deserve to have been alive for this long, in doing so they had taken away all that the others deserved. It should have been different. They all should have at least been given the chance to prove themselves.
Vessel shouldn't have been the one to survive. They should be dead. They deserved to be dead. They should not be the one living in their stead.
So then why? Why must it all be so cruel, that the most worthless of them all is the one to live? But would it be disgraceful to those who had fallen to just die now, after surviving this long and killing their tormentor? Or would they all have wanted this, would they have wanted all the vessels to join them in death?
Once again Vessel didn't have an answer. And they hated that. They hated not knowing so, so much. Maybe it would be better for them to die, at least then they wouldn't have to think about it anymore, if there was an afterlife maybe they would be able to get answers.
It didn't matter though. It never did. Why would it matter what some worthless failure thought, what a piece of trash that not even Abyssal felt was worth killing would want?
Vessel collapsed under the weight of their own body, hitting the blood coated floor beneath them. They didn't have the strength nor will to get back up. Maybe they should just drown in the blood and viscera of their maker, join all those who came before them in death. That would be easier than continuing on, not that there was anything worth continuing for.