Chapter Text
February 21
+34*********
Hey mate, I wanted to ask if you want to go golfing on Sunday?
+44*********
I’m sorry, dude, but you’ve got the wrong number.
I’ve never played golf.
+34*********
Shit, I’m sorry.
+44*********
No problem. But maybe you got the wrong area code?
This is a British number and you’re using a Spanish one?
+34*********
No, the area code is right. I was trying to message a British number,
but my friend probably wrote it down wrong.
He’s not the best at writing things down.
+44*********
Okay.
March 3
+44*********
Random dude from Spain that plays golf —
What do you do when you ruin your roommate’s favourite T-shirt?
You’re a guy, right???
+34*********
Yes, I’m a guy, and I don’t know… I’ve never had a roommate.
Depends on how you ruined it, I would say.
+44*********
I accidentally put it in with the black wash and now it has black spots all over it.
And you really never had a roommate? You’re lucky.
What’s your name, by the way?
Didn’t get it last time.
+34*********
I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to give out my name to strangers on the internet.
+44*********
Oh come on, I’ll tell you mine too.
+34*********
Okay, so what’s your name?
+44*********
It’s Oscar!!
Now what’s your name?
+34*********
I’m Carlos.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
That’s really Spanish — not that I ever met a Spanish person or been to Spain.
Carlos
You’ve never been to Spain?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
No, how rich do you think I am??
I’m a broke student, I can barely afford dinner sometimes.
Why do you think I have a roommate?
Carlos
That’s actually sad.
But why did you text me about your roommate’s T-shirt?
I mean… you don’t know me.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Don’t know actually. You seem older than I am, and if I texted my best friend she would probably laugh at me — so I texted you.
Carlos
How old do you think I am?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Don’t know, but you play golf, that’s an old-people sport.
But you also don’t text like you’re 50 either, so maybe… 35?
Carlos (old dude from Spain)
I’m 31.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
You see? Told you you’re old.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
If you think 31 is old, how old are you??
Please don’t tell me you’re a minor.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Chill, old man — I’m 23.
So if you’re 31, you already finished studying?
Carlos(old dude from spain)
I never went to uni. I got a job straight after I graduated.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
That’s cool. I wish I didn’t need to go to uni.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
What are you studying?
Oscar
Engineering. It’s stressful as hell.
It’s probably not the smartest idea that I just told that to a stranger on the internet…
but who cares.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Engineering sounds cool. Isn’t it also super hard?
Oscar
Yeah, unfortunately.
gtg now — classes are calling.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Have fun
March 8
Carlos (old dude from Spain):
So what did your roommate say about the T-shirt?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Haven’t told him yet.
Hoping he isn’t going to find out any time soon.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
That’s actually not really nice of you, Oscar.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
I’m never nice.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
So what are you doing at the moment, “never nice engineering student” Oscar?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Sitting in class right now.
I swear my professor wants me dead.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
You have to pay attention in class, Oscar.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
But it’s a lot more fun texting you.
So what are you doing today?
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Going to sleep — it’s rather late where I am right now.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
So you don’t work in Spain?
Carlos(old dude from spain)
No, I travel a lot for my work.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
That’s really cool.
The only time I travel is when I fly home to my family,
and I haven’t done that for one and a half years.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Oh, so where do you study if you have to fly to England to visit your family?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Oh, I’m not from England. I’m from Australia actually.
But I study in London.
And it’s less expensive if I have a British phone number.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Ah, that explains a lot.
Do you miss Australia?
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Sometimes. Especially when it’s raining again — like,
why does it always have to rain in bloody London?
Carlos(old dude from spain)
I get what you mean. I have to be in the UK for work often
and it always rains when I’m there.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
So what do you do for work then?
If you always travel and have to come to the UK so often?
Carlos(old dude from spain)
I can’t tell you, unfortunately.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
Really, why not? ):
Carlos(old dude from spain)
My boss is rather controlling.
I’m sorry.
Oscar (wrong number guy)
No problem.
But I should probably put my phone away —
my professor is looking at me like I burned his cat.
Have a nice day.
Or good night.
Carlos(old dude from spain)
Thanks, you too, Oscar