Archive of Our Own

In the busy streets of Kabukicho, located in the heart of Shinjuku, a new establishment of pleasure was developed. Despite being a country filled with video game gambling, horse racing, and pachinko, there had never been a casino. Gambling was highly illegal except for those the government could control.

But the government couldn’t control everything.

Disguising itself as a club, not unusual in Kabukicho, with dancing girls and ones willing to do a little more personal dances, was something more than that – Emerald. It became a place where illegal betting could happen through simple games not unlike a casino. Staff hosted the games for patrons to play at, making sure it was fair – that is, unless a certain price was paid.

Isagi stumbled onto this job by accident. He had been laid off from his old one and had been desperately looking for something that could help him survive. Living in Tokyo was not cheap and he had already worked through multiple jobs during his years in university and he really didn’t want to go through that again. He had thought finding full-time employment in the city was a mere dream that he could even deal with the overtime that came with it, only to be booted almost a year later. 

His best friend, Bachira, who Isagi noticed had been living quite freely, introduced him to the job. He played it up, saying that all he did was play games, socialize and entertain very wealthy customers, and get paid very well. They needed some more staff as more people came in so he recruited Isagi. It was at night and Isagi still had energy to work that late, and it allowed him to do errands in the day so it didn’t seem like such a bad deal.

But the reality was quite different.

Isagi tried not to twitch at the memory, cleaning up and setting up the poker area after a round. He had gotten used to the smell of smoke from cigarettes and the permeating scent of alcohol as he did his job.

He had been there for a few months and despite learning what kind of thing he (and Bachira) had gotten into, he was no longer as jumpy. At first, he was worried because technically it was illegal. But surprisingly, there was a high level of security and people could only access it through an invitation. Isagi wore a mask to cover his face as did many of the other patrons though it wasn’t hard to see past some of them. He had recognized some prominent politicians and celebrities despite the masks but he didn’t say anything as he was trained not to. No one was supposed to know of this place’s existence and no one was to know anyone who came. With Isagi’s bank account on the line, he had to keep his mouth shut.

However, there was one person everyone seemed to acknowledge from staff to patrons.

“Welcome, Boss.”

The boss of the establishment, the master of this domain, and the one who controlled Isagi’s paycheck. He too wore a mask when he came in but his presence was overwhelming and stood above the rest. He always wore a sleek, tailored suit that fit his body perfectly, accenting his long legs and perfect form; his hair was styled like a model, but it was a shame that he didn’t show his face because even Isagi could tell he was good looking. The only details he could see of his face were his piercing teal eyes and those soft looking, pink lips.

Isagi tried not to blush at the thought. For all he knew, the rest of his face was ugly, wrinkled and definitely not his type. He couldn’t assume such a thing by how he dressed or how kissable his lips seemed to be! And it didn’t matter because he was Isagi’s boss and an extremely powerful figure.

“I heard he might be yakuza.” Bachira said after Isagi signed his work contract.

“The boss?!” Isagi exclaimed. Bachira immediately hushed him, placing a hand over his mouth. Both looked around the cafe, making sure that no one had heard them and then Bachira removed his hand from Isagi’s mouth. Isagi hissed. “Are you insane?! Working for…one of them?! And you only told me now?”

“I don’t know if he really is or not. He’s only come in like, twice since I’ve been there and it’s not like Karasu is willing to give out details.” Bachira pointed out, speaking about the establishment’s manager. “It’s just a rumour and assumption.”

“Don’t go spreading it around then.” Isagi grumbled. “I don’t want to lose such a high paying job before I even start.”

“Hehe, right?!”

“Welcome, Boss.” Isagi greeted as the boss took a seat at the poker table. Despite what Bachira said, the boss seemed to come in more than twice since Isagi started there three months ago. Isagi worked four times a week with overtime on the weekends being mandatory and he had seen him at every shift. He particularly seemed to like playing poker.

“Heh, what an honour to get a chance to play against the boss!” One of the men already seated at the poker table whom Isagi recognized as the actor known as Oliver Aiku said with a grin. “I heard you’ve been coming more frequently but I didn’t expect you to play.”

“Maybe because anyone I play with always loses.” The boss’ voice was rough, which surprised Isagi the first time he heard him speak. He had expected something elegant like his appearance but his low voice wasn’t…unsuitable either. The huskiness of it made Isagi’s chest tremble, wanting to listen to it more. He silently placed his bet in, the same amount of chips he always put.

“Arrogant like always.” Aiku muttered but he didn’t sound offended as he seemed to expect it. “How about putting another wager then? If I win, I can bring anyone back with me.”

The boss was silent for a moment as if carefully considering Aiku’s words.

“Your wording is vaguer than usual.” The boss replied silently, eyes shifting to him. There was suspicion in his voice. “Who do you have in mind?” 

Aiku just grinned before turning to Isagi. Isagi was surprised to see the attention suddenly on him but hid it. He became uncomfortable when he saw Aiku’s eyes scan him up and down.

“This one.” Aiku pointed to Isagi. “This newbie here. Kiyoshi, yeah? He’s got a nice ass. I’d like to rip into it at least once.”

Working with a club at the front, Isagi expected to get a lot of pervs coming in but they were usually there for the girls. However, there were some that had a taste for guys that he was subjected to harassment from. His contract clearly stated that he had no obligation to do such a thing and the boss was there. There was no way he was willing to throw his own worker to the wolves and break his contract like that.

“Sure.”

Isagi felt his blood run cold. He must have been hallucinating that voice, after hearing it so many times at the establishment and…imagining it at home, he couldn’t believe he would say such a thing. Even if the boss was actually a yakuza (and at this point, Isagi had no doubt), he must have a bit more pride to honour his worker’s contract at least.

“I apologize, gentlemen.” Isagi gave a polite smile, trying to hide his rage and disgust. From all the times the boss has been in, he had never done something this scummy before. He actually had started respecting him as a savvy businessman despite it being an illegal business. The staff, including the hostesses in the front, seemed to be taken care of very well considering what industry they were in. There was security as well to handle all the bad customers, and the managers were very well-trained to handle any situation that may arise. This was such a let down. “My contract says I’m not obligated to do such a thing.”

“Hmm? You’re going against your boss’ orders?” Aiku asked with a sneer. He leaned against the edge of the table, looking at Isagi. “He can fire you for such disrespect and then we won’t need to go through this game then.”

Isagi stiffened. He glanced over at the boss who didn’t react to what Aiku was saying.

“Let’s just start already.” The boss sounded annoyed. “Kiyoshi, yeah? Start the game or else you’re fired.”

“Y-Yes, boss.” Isagi replied, feeling slightly disappointed that he didn’t defend him. He wasn’t necessarily surprised though as some of his past bosses were pain in the asses but this place, despite what it is, had decent employees. He had slotted himself easily there, able to talk easily with the patrons except for these rare moments but at times like this, someone like Karasu was able to step in to deter them away.

If someone like the boss wasn’t going to take things into his own hands, then Isagi would.

The game started and Isagi kept a careful eye on their match. He was in charge of the poker table because he had some knowledge prior to getting hired, and this included cheating. He played quite a bit of poker when he was in university and picked it up by watching and examining. He learned a few tricks here and there though he never had the need to use them as he preferred fairplay.

However, if his ass was on the line, then fairplay was out the window.

As the match went on, Isagi made sure to mess with the cards occasionally so he wouldn’t be caught. Aiku won a couple just to throw him off the trail but Isagi would sneak a good hand over to the boss more than him. They weren’t spectacular as it would be a single pair versus Aiku’s high card, but enough that it was convincing.

“Last round.” Aiku said as Isagi dealt the hands. He looked up at Isagi with a smarmy grin on his face. “I’m feeling lucky tonight.”

Isagi didn’t say anything, wanting this to be done as quickly as possible. He wanted to smack the arrogant expression on Aiku’s face but resisted so he wouldn’t actually get fired and then all rules were off the table.

The boss was quiet. He usually was, preferring to observe rather than speak. It was one of the reasons why he gave off such an intimidating aura: no one could tell what he was thinking. He was hard to read, especially with that mask, but when Isagi glanced at him after dealing the cards, he could see the teal staring intensely at him.

When they picked up their hands, it wasn’t hard to miss the smirk on Aiku’s face, clearly pleased with what he received.

“I’m clearly in.” Aiku said as he threw his chips in. He looked over at the boss. “So?”

The boss was silent as he stared at his cards. He then pushed some chips in. “Raise”

“Ohoho?” Aiku grinned even wider. “Since this is the last one, might as well go all in.”

Isagi didn’t know why Aiku was so confident unless he was playing it up. He didn’t have anything spectacular, just a pair. He must really wanted the boss to fold, trying to act all confident–

“Four of a kind.”

Isagi froze when Aiku revealed his hand. He tried not to respond, staying as cool as he could even though that was not the hand he was dealt. That meant that Aiku was cheating?! Did he manage to swap out the cards when Isagi wasn’t looking?! But he swore he was looking so how…?

His heart was pounding. He only dealt the boss a three of a kind which meant Aiku was going to win. Karasu wasn’t in view so he couldn’t make eye contact with him to indicate an emergency so that means he would have to fight Aiku to escape this bet. But Aiku was a famous actor and model so he had money – money he could sue Isagi with.

“Hmm.” The boss hummed and Isagi felt himself panic. He tried to figure out if there was a place he could run away, hide for a bit. He shouldn’t have gotten a job there, especially after learning the risks. He just wanted a decent pay to survive in the city. He could’ve found another job so he could just scrape by instead— “Five of a kind.”

Isagi paused his thoughts, slowly turning to the boss. Indeed, laying on the table was his hand, four kings and a wild card. But…

They weren’t playing with a wild card.

So, did that mean…?

“Are you fucking serious?” Aiku sounded both impressed and disgusted. “That can’t be right. We haven’t seen a fucking wild card all night and you get one on the last round?”

“It seems luck was in my favour.” The boss stated coolly as he leaned back in his seat. “You won’t be taking Kiyoshi’s ass today. Maybe you’d be interested in some extra VIP time with Tamako-san? She said she’s been missing you recently.”

“Oh, has she?” And just as quickly, Isagi was forgotten. The boss led Aiku out of the back to the front and Isagi managed to sigh in relief, his heart finally slowing down in pace.

His ass was saved.

“Isagi.” Karasu called for him while he was changing in the back. “The boss wants to see you.”

“I-I’ll be there in a minute.” Isagi stuttered. Karasu left and when he turned, he saw that Bachira, who was half dressed, was staring at him intensely.

“What did you do?” Bachira asked, his voice full of amusement and worry. “The boss doesn’t really talk to guys like us, only to the manager. Did you do something to piss him off?”

“I—” Isagi didn’t want to admit that he had cheated. Bachira wouldn’t believe him in the first place because that’s not Isagi’s style. However, would the boss be angry at that? He was cheating in his favour after and that last play meant he cheated himself! He would be a hypocrite if he got angry at Isagi for that! “Maybe?”

That was the only thing he could think of. Isagi quickly changed and Bachira said he’d wait for him.

“Just in case I need to report you missing if you don’t come back.” Bachira explained with a nod. “I’m not sure how helpful I’ll be though because it might never reach the courts, but at least I won’t be at home, wondering what happened to you if I never see you again.”

“Gee, thanks.”

Despite the terrifying words, Isagi felt himself shake his head in disbelief. It calmed him down a little but not as much when he approached Karasu’s office. His hand was twitching, ready to knock but paused when he realized the gravity of the situation.

If the boss truly was a yakuza, there was a chance Isagi wouldn’t be coming back. He would be coerced, tortured, and blackmailed to whatever the boss wanted to do. Did he have to repent? Cut a finger off? Spill his guts out?

The fear welled up in him, paralyzing him in front of the door. It didn’t last long when it suddenly opened, Karasu looking at him expectantly.

“Freakish instincts.” Karasu muttered much to Isagi’s confusion. He opened the door wider. “Come in.”

Isagi stepped in, familiar with Karasu’s office having been there before. However, he saw the boss sitting there at Karasu’s desk and felt his breath catch in his throat, staring at the now unmasked man in all his glory.

He knew that he’d have a beautiful face. Isagi could just tell by his features.

But this was beyond anything he could imagine.

He was surprisingly young, looking more delicate than he expected, but he had a sharp profile, striking and memorable. There were parts of his skin that looked smooth and without blemishes but there was a scar coming down on his left eye but it didn’t deter from how beautiful they were. Isagi had thought his eyes were piercing with his mask on but without it, it was like he was being penetrated by that gaze, his entire body getting hot at how he looked at him, those long eyelashes making him extra pretty and mysterious at the same time. There was a sense of danger, befitting of his aura, but also something very…sensual.

He’s so fucking hot.

Isagi just knew that at that moment, any model or actor he had fantasized himself with at night would be replaced by the boss’ face. He couldn’t help it, he was exactly Isagi’s type, and he could only imagine what that gaze would be like in bed. He wanted to take off those gloves he had on and have them touch him, roaming around his body, touching his most sensitive parts—

“‘Kiyoshi’, real name: Isagi Yoichi.” The boss said as he looked at a file on the desk.

God, even the way he said his name, with that slightest growl in that husky voice was enough material to last Isagi for the week.

“Y-Yes?” Isagi squeaked. He blushed furiously at how his voice went high-pitched for a brief second, totally humiliating himself in front of the boss. He knew he had no chance in hell with him but goddamn, after that pathetic sound, he definitely had nothing.

The boss looked at him silently. Isagi felt himself squirm under his gaze for two very different reasons.

“Karasu, leave.” He spoke and Karasu gave a small salute.

“Yes, boss.”

The door closed behind him and now, he and Isagi were alone. He glanced around nervously, unsure if he was even allowed to look at the boss in the face. Despite all the inappropriate thoughts in his head, it was awkward looking at him because he was afraid he would just be blinded by his beauty. 

“I didn’t think Karasu had a bad eye for people, especially those who were willing to cheat so openly.”

There it was. The reason he was there. Isagi assumed as much but he still felt bad for getting caught.

“I-I didn’t want you to lose, boss.” Isagi stuttered, looking down at his feet.

“Because I’m the boss or because you didn’t want some stranger to fuck you?”

“O-Of course I wouldn’t want a stranger to fu…do inappropriate things to me!” Isagi corrected, unsure if he was even allowed to swear in front of the boss. They didn’t have such a relationship that Isagi could be openly casual. “But I also wanted you to win! I couldn’t let you lose!”

“Even though you failed in that last round?”

Isagi froze because he couldn’t answer that. Aiku had clearly cheated as that wasn’t the hand he had dealt so Isagi would’ve been screwed. It was only when the boss managed to pull out a wild card was his ass safe from him.

“That was an oversight on my part.” Isagi admitted, lowering his head in a more formal bow. “I’m so sorry! It will never happen again!”

It wouldn’t happen in the first place if the boss had just defended his worker! All Isagi was trying to do was save himself. It was clearly for survival!

“Your stunt nearly ruined our reputation.” The boss said. Isagi heard him moving, taking a few steps before his shoes appeared in his vision. His hand reached for Isagi’s face, grabbing his chin and forcing him to look up into those mesmerizing eyes. “If you were caught, our guests would be questioning our entire establishment, calling all their losses cheating. That would be the end of Emerald and ruin my reputation.”

“I-I’m sorry!” Isagi apologized, nearly in tears. He definitely didn’t think it through, but he panicked too much. What else was he supposed to do in that scenario?! If they played normally, there was a chance that Aiku would win and with how the boss was acting, he didn’t care if Isagi had to give up his ass. He had to take things into his own hands. “I’ll do anything! Just…don’t kill me.”

“Hoo? Kill you?” There was a flash in the bosses eyes that made Isagi weak in the knees though he wasn’t quite sure whether it was positive or negative. “Do you think I’m interested in that?”

“T-Then…” Isagi was going to live. There was a small glimmer of hope and perhaps a belief that maybe the boss wasn’t the yakuza. He was just someone with an intimidating and sexy aura and he would let Isagi off with a warning.

He suddenly realized how dangerously close he was to the boss’ face, able to so those long eyelashes even closer. He stared at his eyes, heart pounding in his chest as he felt himself completely smitten by them. After a few seconds of silence between the two of them, he swore he saw a twitch in the boss’ cheek and was suddenly terrified he had offended him somehow. 

“Your body.” The boss said, voice quieter than before. There was a breathiness in it that made Isagi melt.

“…what?” Isagi questioned, not quite out of his daze yet. He blinked in confusion.

“I haven’t claimed my prize from saving your ass.” He said, voice almost like a whisper haunting Isagi’s insides. “I’ll take your body.”

Isagi stared before feeling his face burn once more. He swallowed nervously, his heart about to explode at this rate.

The boss was asking for his body.

His body? What did that mean? Did he perhaps have the same inclinations as Isagi and was just as interested? That couldn’t be so because Isagi was just…Isagi. He was no way as gorgeous, hot, breathtaking, sexy, erotic, probably has a huge d—

Ahem.

…as his boss.

But…if the boss was interested in his body in some capacity, who was Isagi to say no to that?

Isagi had certain expectations. When a man that hot with his hands on him saying that he wanted his body, he expected something a little more…explicit. Isagi considered that he must have sensed his own gaze on him every time he came into Emerald and Isagi was too obvious, so he took things into his own hands. Isagi was both nervous and excited when the boss asked to meet with him on his next day off.

Isagi even trimmed a little.

Needless to say, he was absolutely shocked when he met the boss at the station, out of his sleek and stylish suit, wearing…that.

He stood out and caught everyone’s eye but not in the usual way. The boss still had an aura that made it hard to approach, not because he was cool but because he was…lame.

Wearing the loudest leopard print shirt Isagi had ever seen and he was suddenly blinded in a different way. The sleeves were rolled up to his forearm, his left arm behind him but he could see the scars on them, and on his right arm, Isagi could see a sleeve tattoo peeking from underneath. Details of life were shown but also, parts of it were hidden. Despite the fact that the sun was setting, he wore a pair of sunglasses that were so tinted, one couldn’t see where he was looking, but Isagi saw that his eyebrows were knitted, glaring at something.

Isagi felt like a fool. Where was the well-dressed man he had seen almost every night for the past three months?! The one that wore sexy suits that Isagi could easily fantasize himself ripping off?! And after it seemed like he finally got noticed by him, he showed up like…that.

He felt cheated!

But he couldn’t just leave. He was already there, prepping for a night of pleasure, and if he abandoned him now, who knew if he would have organs by the end of the night? The boss knew where he lives and Isagi did owe him for saving him from Aiku…

And it’s not like the boss was going to be wearing clothes for that much longer.

He inhaled and stepped forward, trying to be brave. He placed a smile on his face.

“Good evening, boss!” Isagi greeted, causing the boss to look up. “I’m sorry, did you wait long? I apologize if I got the time wrong.”

“No, you didn’t.” The boss replied, his voice sounding more surprised than anything. His voice got lower. “You actually came.”

“Hm?” Isagi blinked. “Was…I not supposed to?”

“No, it’s just—” The boss paused and Isagi waited for him to continue. However, he dropped it all together. “Never mind.”

Isagi continued to smile but he was more confused. The boss threatened him so he could use his body and he thought Isagi wasn’t going to show up? He had his job to worry about after all. 

Maybe…maybe he was having second thoughts. Isagi wasn’t the most attractive person, having an average face that didn’t really stand out, and he wasn’t rich considering his job. Maybe after arranging this meeting, the boss was having second thoughts.

What a shame. Isagi would’ve liked to be under his body at least once.

“H-Here.” Isagi snapped out of his thoughts when the boss spoke and in his hands was a small bouquet of flowers. “For you.”

Isagi stared at it, not sure what to make of it. The only time he had received flowers before was during his graduations and that was from his parents. It was strange that suddenly his boss was giving him flowers out of the blue.

“T-Thank you.” Isagi accepted them with as much gratitude as he could despite his confusion. It wasn’t too over the top and had a good balance. Isagi wasn’t knowledgeable about flowers but whatever they were, they were really pretty.

The boss grunted and looked away and Isagi thought his cheeks looked pinker than usual.

When the boss didn’t respond, Isagi wondered if he should say something. Even during work, he didn’t say much except to patrons but even that was minimal.

“So, where are we going today, boss?” Isagi asked. He had given flowers to soften him a little which did help him be a little more relaxed with the atrocity he wore. They could move on and the Isagi could finally rip that shirt off.

The boss didn’t answer immediately but he did turn back to look at Isagi…at least he thought he did. It was hard to tell with those sunglasses on him. There was a prolonged moment of silence before he spoke.

“Rin.”

“What?” Isagi wasn’t sure what he heard since it was so short.

“It’s fucking weird if you call me ‘boss’ all the time.” The boss said with irritation.

Isagi considered it. It was weird if he was going to call him ‘boss’ in public but it’s not like they were going to be in public for long, right? But if the boss insisted, Isagi could do as he wished.

“Then…‘Rin’?”

As soon as Isagi said that, the look on the boss’ – Rin’s – face was priceless. His mouth twisted as if he was going to say something but decided against it and he turned away, his cheeks a flaming red that was only amplified by the setting sun.

“Y-Yeah, that’s right…”

Rin became silent and Isagi just waited. Finally, Rin turned and started to walk ahead.

“Come with me.” Rin commanded firmly. Isagi quickly stumbled forward, following him to their destination. He wondered if they were going to go to a nice hotel. They were in Tokyo so there were a lot of fancy places, but then again, Isagi was just an employee of his, so maybe he wasn’t worth the cost. There were also tons of love hotels and they had plenty of options to keep them occupied…

“We’re here.” Isagi nearly bumped into him when he suddenly stopped and looked up, realizing they were at a movie theatre.

He processed it for a moment before blushing, placing his hand over his mouth.

Rin wasn’t thinking about doing it here, was he?!

Sure, when the movie starts, it’ll be dark and hard to see. Sure, it was a prime spot for couples to make out but to go beyond that?! Depending on what movie, the theatre could be empty so it was completely possible. It was a little risqué but people liked doing it in public because they liked the thrill (that’s what Isagi heard, n-not that he ever fantasized about that!) but Isagi had never done so before. If it was Rin though, he’d be willing to try…

But if they were caught, that would be so humiliating.

Rin got two tickets from the machine and Isagi quickly dug out his wallet so he could pay him back but he was stopped.

“Doesn’t matter. It’d be coming out from your paycheck anyways.” 

There was truth in that so Isagi couldn’t reply. The money he would be spending was coming from Rin and Emerald anyways. He supposed he would be expecting a deduction in his next paycheck then.

Rin handed him his ticket. “You can head to the seats. I’ll get popcorn. What do you want to drink?”

“Oh, um, melon soda is fine.” Isagi replied. Before he got a chance to offer to help, Rin already walked away briskly as if he was in a rush. There wasn’t even a long line for him to worry about.

Isagi went ahead and went to find their seats. He settled down and noticed that the theatre wasn’t exactly empty. There were already people there, even some families with kids, chatting excitedly with the ads coming on.

He paled.

Was…was Rin thinking of doing it there where there were kids?! Even if he was yakuza, that was just too much, wasn’t it?! There were people in their row, in front of them, and behind them. They would be caught before anything could even happen.

What kind of morals did he have?!

Rin eventually arrived with two large containers of popcorn and two large drinks and some extra snacks. Isagi quickly got up to help him and then Rin gave him the extra chocolate bars.

“They were free.” Rin mumbled as he sat down. Isagi followed suit, noticing that the people around them became strangely quiet once he arrived.

“Oh, really? We must be lucky then!” Isagi smiled. The popcorn was a bit much because if they moved suddenly, it would definitely cause a mess. 

The reminder made Isagi frown.

“Um, bo—I mean, Rin.” Isagi began. He was a bit nervous with Rin’s eyes on him, especially when he just took off those sunglasses and it almost choked him up at how pretty he was. “I’m…I’m not sure if this is a good idea.”

“What?” Rin almost sounded angry when he spoke. “Why the hell not? Didn’t you want to see this movie?”

“I mean, there’s just so many people here and—” He paused, his brain finally catching up with Rin’s words. “What?”

“This movie. You wanted to see it, right?” Rin said pointedly.

Isagi blinked in confusion before finally looking down at his ticket.

Indeed, this was a movie he had been wanting to see since he saw the trailer. It had just been released the past weekend and he was working late or sleeping so he hadn’t had a chance to figure out when to go yet with all the errands he had to do as well.

“How did you know?” Isagi asked quietly as he furrowed his eyebrows.

“You mentioned it at…work.” Rin replied, keeping it vague. “I heard you talking to a customer about it.”

“I see.” Isagi nodded as if it made sense but it didn’t. Even he couldn’t remember talking to someone about the movie so it must have been a one-off thing. The fact that Rin could remember even though he couldn’t, and even brought him to see the movie, taking care of the ticket and the snacks, it was just so…

…nice.

Rin was actually very nice.

He stared at the ticket stub, feeling something fuzzy in his chest. He smiled softly though he couldn’t quite understand the warmth in his chest but he knew that he liked it.

“Thank you.” Isagi finally said.

Rin was staring at him intensely and Isagi wondered if there was something on his face. When their eyes met, Rin quickly looked away, focusing on the promos as it played on the screen.

“It’s not a big deal.” Rin mumbled, grabbing his popcorn and began munching on it.

Even with his gruff voice and seemingly uncaring attitude, Isagi couldn’t help but laugh. He turned back to the screen, opening up a chocolate bar as a pre-movie snack, calmer and now excited to see the movie.

This was a better plan than what Isagi originally thought.

Isagi felt invigorated after exiting the theatre. The movie was as good as he thought it was and was so glad he got a chance to see it.

“The special effects were so good.” He began to ramble, remembering how the hero’s superpowers appeared. “It was flashy and looked great but still held the same feeling as the original TV show. They really kept an atmosphere similar to the original for those who grew up on it but still kept it modern! It was done so well…”

Isagi trailed off, belatedly realizing that he was talking to the boss. He glanced over and saw that he didn’t seem to be paying attention, looking forward as he kept walking. Perhaps he was being ignored because of his yammering and was destroying the atmosphere.

“…it was good.” Rin suddenly spoke quietly, causing Isagi to look over. He grinned, glad to get a response.

“I really liked the scene at the end when the hero was saying his goodbyes.” Isagi recalled, remembering how bittersweet it was. With his love interest dying in the end, instead of causing havoc in such a dire situation from heartbreak, he channeled that energy so he could save the world, knowing that his love interest would want that from him. “Although it was important for the hero to realize that his loss could be his strength, it sucks because I was really rooting for them. I was hoping for a happy ending where they could be together.”

“…but it gives a weight to it as well.” Rin replied. “Not everything has a happy ending and loss is inevitable.”

“That’s true, but in an ideal world, wouldn’t it be great if they were happy?” Isagi asked without thinking. “For the characters you think you deserve it, and even people you care about, you only wish for their happiness.”

“But the reality is different.”

“It is.” Isagi agreed with a nod. “Happiness isn’t an immediate thing. It can be achieved today or tomorrow or even in the future, but the one thing that I love about the movie is the message that you can achieve it even far into the future as long as you believe.”

“Are you happy now?”

Isagi paused, wondering about Rin’s question. Did he mean in life right now or at this moment with him? He had gotten rid of a lot of his nerves and was relieved that they merely watched a movie in the theatre rather than other things since it was so public (though Isagi was sure he wouldn’t mind if there were no other people…) but was he happy? He was happy that he saw the film and happy he got to discuss it with Rin. In terms of his current situation in life, he knew he could be happier.

“I guess I am.” Isagi replied though he knew that it wasn’t a straight forward answer. “In my current status in life, I definitely wish I had more, but that’s part of living, right? I’m not even sure what it means to reach the pinnacle of happiness but I feel like there’s more I want to do before being completely satisfied.”

“Like what?”

“Um…” Isagi thought about it. He would like to move out of his tiny apartment and get a bigger one so he could have a bit more space, maybe one day adopt a cat or a dog or both. He wanted to get a job that wasn’t so risky, preferably in his field, but he couldn’t complain about the money or the days off. And one day, he’d like to get a lover, one that could fill his every fantasy and more.

But he felt embarrassed saying all that to Rin.

“More money.” Isagi said, forming a circle with his thumb and index finger while the others stuck out. He meant to say it more as a joke but Rin looked like he was considering it.

“…so you want a raise?” Rin concluded seriously, the joke completely going over his head.

Isagi felt bad if he said ‘yes’, especially since he just got treated to the movie and snacks.

“I think I just need to learn to save a bit better.” He responded so he could escape. “Living in Tokyo is a bit pricey so I need to re-evaluate what I want to spend money on. You know, that kind of stuff.”

Isagi realized that he had been talking only about himself. Maybe he talked too much or Rin was too quiet, but it didn’t feel right.

“What about you?” Isagi asked curiously. “What makes you happy?”

There was a brief second when Rin’s eyes widened slightly before going back to normal as if he didn’t expect Isagi to ask that. He didn’t say anything at first, contemplating his answer.

“Nothing.” He said it so nonchalantly that it made it seem like he never thought about it before.

“Well, what do you do in your free time?” Isagi inquired. He felt awkward leaving it like that even when Rin didn’t look offended by his question. “If you weren’t here with me, what would you be doing?”

“‘Free time’?” Rin snorted, unamused.

“Or if you’re so busy, what about drinks or food you like?” Isagi tried to think of something. He didn’t want to make Rin feel bad.

“Whatever isn’t poisonous.”

…what an answer.

Isagi couldn’t find the words to respond to that.

The conversation stalled for a bit as they kept walking. Rin had taken the lead once more and they found themselves in front of a yakiniku restaurant. Although not a fancy place, meat was expensive and Isagi hesitated following him.

“What?” Rin turned to him with a raised eyebrow. “You don’t like meat?”

“Oh, uh, no! That’s not it!” Isagi shook his head. “If we’re eating here, I can at least pay for my part.”

“It’s fine.”

“But it’s dinner time and it’s expensive! I don’t mind—”

“Just get in.”

“Yes, boss!”

Isagi quickly got inside the restaurant with Rin following. As it was dinner time, it was quite busy so Isagi stopped at the front booth, about to write his name on the list of waiting patrons when Rin stepped forward in front of the staff.

“I have a reservation under ‘Itoshi’.” Rin spoke gruffly, eyes looking at the host.

The host jumped in surprise, considerably shorter than Rin, looking from the sunglasses perched on his head, to the scar across his eye, to the ridiculous shirt, and even going to the small peek of the tattoo on his arm.

“R-Right! We’ve been expecting you!” The host said, gesturing with a polite bow towards the seats. “Please follow me!”

They were led inside an empty booth with a ‘reserved’ sign on it. Isagi looked at the menu, practically drooling at the pictures of meat and the selection of alcohol. The scent of meat from the other tables made his stomach growl, but he had to contain himself. Although Rin said he was paying, he didn’t want to go for something expensive. He was his boss after all.

Rin reached over for the tablet on the table to order, pressing a few buttons.

“Here.” He grunted as he passed it to Isagi. “Order what meats you want and your drink.”

Isagi nodded, looking at what they had. He wasn’t sure how much alcohol he should consume considering Rin was paying so he checked to see what he got.

…and saw that Rin already selected two premium yakiniku courses and two all-you-can-drink courses.

“Eh?! Is that okay?!” Isagi asked as he looked up. He flushed when he realized Rin was watching him. “The premium course and all-you-can-drink combined is really expensive. Like I said, I can pay for my own—”

“You’re so fucking nitpicky.” Rin snapped, causing Isagi to become silent instantly. “I said it’s fine, just order whatever the fuck you want.”

“A-Alright.” Isagi stuttered, looking back at the tablet. If Rin really was willing to pay for all-you-can-eat and drink, that means that Isagi didn’t need to hold back, right? But he shouldn’t get too drunk because who knows what would happen then.

He was drunk.

No, he wasn’t! Isagi was definitely not drunk! His vision was only a little blurry, and there was a slight slur in his speech but that was only ‘a little’ and ‘slight’. He didn’t have that much to drink. He had maybe a couple of beers, some sake, a few highballs, and was working on a bottle of shochu.

It wasn’t that much.

“Oiiii, bosssss.” Isagi said as he looked at Rin who was watching him with an expression he couldn’t identify with his clouded mind at the moment. “You knooooow. You have some really pretty eyeeees.”

“You’ve told me this already.”

“Yeahhh but they’re reaaaally, reaaaaaaally pretty.” Isagi repeated. He released the bottle of shochu and reached out for his face. Rin flinched but that didn’t deter him from touching his cheek, even with his fingertips. “Ridiculously so. What the fuck. This isn’t fair! How can you be so pretty and cool at the same time?! The Gods really picked favourites, didn’t they?!”

“…you’re exaggerating.”

“Eh?! Why would you say that?!” Isagi placed his hand down, slamming it on the table. “When you receive a gift, you should embrace it! Take advantage of what the Gods have given you or you might lose it forever!”

Suddenly, Isagi placed his head in his arms. He was suddenly reminded of how he was at a standstill with life. No advancing career, stuck in a cheap rental apartment, no relationship – he had nothing going for him.

He began to sob.

“What the hell is wrong now?!” He heard Rin exclaim. He looked up, tears running down his cheeks.

“I just want a boyfriend!” Isagi cried out dramatically. “Someone who’s hot, good to me, would love for them to be rich too…no, I need to be independent too! I want a better job, get a new apartment, get a pet…”

He had so many things he wanted but he wasn’t there yet. Happiness felt so far away and he wanted it to come closer faster!

“You’ve had too much to drink.” Rin said, reaching out for the bottle of shochu. Isagi held onto it, placing it close to his chest.

“Just because I don’t have anything else doesn’t mean you can take my shochu away!” Isagi yelled. He sniffed and rubbed his face against the bottle. “Precious shochu, you won’t disappear, right?”

It didn’t last long as Rin grabbed the bottle from Isagi’s hands, making him wail. Rin called for the bill and promptly, the waiter came as if predicting their movements. Isagi was still trying to grab the shochu but Rin had his hand on his face and was pushing him away as he paid.

Isagi got dragged out of the restaurant, the bottle of shochu being left on the table much to his dismay. Rin partially carried him, arm over his shoulder and hand on his waist. Whether it was from the alcohol or something else, the spots where Rin was touching were getting hot and Isagi was feeling very uncomfortable in his clothes.

“Hey, boss.” Isagi said, his voice not dragging like before. Rin looked at him with a bit of annoyance which made him…cute? What the fuck? He was pretty, cool, and cute? Life wasn’t fair.

But Isagi was going to take advantage of this.

He leaned forward, grabbing his cheeks and pulled him towards his face, their lips meeting. Rin made a small noise but Isagi took that moment to slip his tongue in his mouth, suddenly hungry once more. His tongue could taste the meat and alcohol Rin had, the flavours melding together with the heat, creating a delicious second dinner. It wasn’t long after until he felt Rin’s arms tighten around his waist and he began to reciprocate, his tongue forcing itself in Isagi’s mouth.

At some point, Isagi found it difficult to breathe. He gasped as their lips parted from each other, his chest heaving and his head feeling light. He looked at Rin who had a conflict of emotions on his face but his eyes were looking at Isagi like he was a prey and his tongue was sticking out slightly out of those pink lips.

“Boss…” Isagi began, pressing himself closer to Rin. He placed his hands on his chest, rubbing them up and down, feeling his muscles. The fact that he also worked out enough to have such defined muscles really got Isagi going. “…you said you’ll take my body, right?”

Perhaps it was the alcohol talking but Isagi couldn’t resist. When the Gods placed this gift of a man in front of him, he had to embrace it!

Ahem.

He had to embrace him.

Isagi woke up to a splitting headache, groaning as he rolled over in the bed and throwing his pillow on top of his face, as if it would help force it to go away. With how plush it was, he would suffocate at this rate but he didn’t care, as long as he didn’t need to feel his head in pain anymore.

It took him a few more moments to process those thoughts before removing the pillow and then opening his eyes, looking up at the unfamiliar ceiling. He just stared at it, thinking about how soft the mattress was to the smallest stream of sunlight peeking between the curtains, and then suddenly became aware of the sound of a shower going.

He sat up quickly, but flinched, nearly falling back down from his headache. He glanced over at the bedside table and saw a glass of water already there. Without thinking, he took it and downed it immediately. Placing the glass down, he saw that there was also a small bottle of painkillers there as if specially prepared for him. He popped a couple in his mouth and swallowed.

Isagi was more or less awake now, still trying to determine what was going on. He remembered that he met with the boss – Rin – yesterday. They went to see a movie then had dinner, Isagi had a bit too much to drink, they kissed…they kissed a lot…then they got to a hotel and—

He gasped, placing a hand on his face, feeling the heat on his cheeks. He looked under the covers and saw that he was not wearing his clothes anymore but instead seemed to be wearing a robe with a logo on its breast with the name of some fancy hotel. He checked underneath and saw that he was still wearing his underwear, was relatively clean if not smelling like alcohol, and he didn’t have any back pain.

So did that mean that even though he and Rin went to a hotel, they didn’t actually…?

On one hand, Isagi was disappointed. He really would have loved to see what was under that hideous shirt he wore yesterday after fantasizing about his body for months, only getting a taste of it when their bodies pressed together from kissing the other night. On the other hand, there was relief because he was so out of it and clearly so drunk that he couldn’t even remember what happened after they got to the hotel. Even if they ended up doing something, Isagi had no memory!

He groaned, pulling his knees up and burying his face into them. He really lost his chance last night, didn’t he? Now, all Rin will think about when he sees Isagi is how big of a fool he was the night before. Any chance of sleeping with such a hot guy was completely gone.

It was probably for the better. Rin was his boss and it’s not like Isagi planned to make this job last forever. Besides, there was a high possibility that Rin was a potentially dangerous criminal and he shouldn’t get himself involved with that, even if he was insanely pretty, hot, sexy, probably had a huge d—

He had to fucking stop.

The shower stopped, snapping Isagi out of his dilemma. The only person that it could have been was Rin so that meant he was going to come out of the bathroom any second now.

Isagi got up but stumbled a little. He looked around the room, unable to find his clothes anywhere – on the floor, in the dresser, nowhere. He began to panic, wondering if this was Rin’s ploy to get revenge for humiliating him last night and when playing against Aiku. He had no clothes except the robe and he would be stopped if he wore it outside! His only other option would be his underwear but that was even worse!

Isagi had insisted on paying for his own things but Rin denied it. And now, they were in a hotel that clearly was on the more expensive side that Rin presumably covered. This was how the yakuza operated against their prey; gaining their favour by being kind, providing food and entertainment that was ‘free’ only for them to slap them with a bill too large for them to pay for and so their life was in their hands.

Was this what Rin meant when he said he wanted his body?! He wanted Isagi to be indebted to him forever?!

The door opened and Isagi froze, slowly turning to the bathroom. As soon as he saw Rin, he felt his legs go completely weak, falling to the floor.

Rin was also wearing a hotel robe but it was tied loosely, revealing his well-toned torso and Isagi had to wipe his lips to make sure that no drool was coming out. He could see on his exposed right pec more tattoos that went under the robe, making him curious. However, despite how beautiful his body was, there were various scars on it, a sign to Isagi, warning him of how dangerous he could really be.

It wasn’t just his body that was enough to make Isagi stare though. He already knew that Rin had a handsome face as well, but having his hair damp from the shower, drops of water dripping down his locks and onto his gorgeous neck, trailing down his chest…

Isagi cursed at his drunken self.

“What are you doing there?”

Isagi jumped, suddenly startled by Rin’s husky voice. He looked down at the ground, realizing he was still there but felt himself unable to stand.

“Oh, I was…looking for my clothes.” Isagi replied a little nervously. He shifted his position, his legs folding underneath him and sat with his back straight. “W-Where are they?”

“I sent them to get cleaned.” Rin replied as he sat on the bed, Isagi’s eyes quickly looking at his legs then back to his face. “You threw up everywhere and got both of our clothes dirty.”

It was worse than Isagi imagined.

Isagi knew that he was absolutely screwed. A movie, dinner with the premium course, a hotel room, and laundry bill?! And who knew what kind of interest Rin would put on it all, especially since he seemed pissed at him for ruining his clothes. Immediately, Isagi placed his hands on the ground and bowed.

“I’m so sorry!” Isagi apologized loudly, fearing for his life. “I’ll pay for the cleaning! I’ll pay for the hotel as well! I’m so sorry for the inconvenience I’ve caused. I’m begging you not to hurt me! I was drunk and was not thinking clearly last night. I sincerely regret the actions I’ve done in my drunken state and will reflect on them.”

That should be a good enough apology, right? Isagi wasn’t sure if Rin was going to accept or not but he would fight for his right to live. If he had to work for Rin longer to pay off his debt, then he would do so! If he had to take a pay cut to compensate, then he would unfortunately have to accept. Anything to keep his life.

“Regret?” He didn’t expect such a rage in Rin’s voice, considering he had put everything he could in that apology. He didn’t look up from the floor yet, fear settling in his bones and making it difficult to move. “You regret it?!”

Isagi let out a small whimper, surprised and absolutely terrified. If the apology wasn’t enough, what else could Isagi offer him? He had no real monetary value to his name and he couldn’t cut his paycheck too much since he still had to pay rent and bills.

Was his body all he had?

“Then!” Isagi sat up, grabbing the belt around his robe and started to undo it. “If my apology is not enough, you can use my body how you wish!”

This wasn’t how he imagined doing the deed with Rin, but if he accepted, Isagi would not stop him, especially since this would be a win for him too.

“No! What the fuck are you doing?!”

In an instant, Rin had gotten up and knelt in front of Isagi, placing his hands on his to prevent him from unrobe himself. His face was red from anger causing Isagi to release his belt.

So Rin didn’t want his body either? God, Isagi felt like such a fool now. When he initially said he wanted his body, despite his fears, he couldn’t help but feel a little flattered that someone this hot would want someone like him even if it ended up being a one night stand. Even in this moment where Rin could use Isagi to his advantage, he didn’t. It was strange that despite how morally correct it was, Isagi was a bit disappointed.

“S-Sorry.” Isagi replied quietly, feeling a little lost. He didn’t know what he could offer to Rin now. “It just seemed like you were angry with my apology so I was willing to do anything to get you to forgive me…”

“And you were going to whore yourself to me to do so?!” Rin sounded so angry that it surprised Isagi. He sat down in front of him, placing his index finger and thumb on the bridge of his nose, rubbing it. “Goddammit, I knew this was a bad idea…”

Isagi felt a small pang in his chest as he said that. So Rin did regret…whatever it was with Isagi. He probably regretted asking for his body after learning how much of a pain he was when he was drunk. They seemed to have gotten along well enough when discussing the movie and Isagi wished that he just resisted taking advantage of the all-you-can-drink so he would stay sober.

He didn’t know what he should say in this situation. It was clear that Rin was pissed off at him and his apologies didn’t work so what else could he say? He looked down at his lap and rubbed the back of his hands, wishing he had his clothes so he could just leave.

“I won’t hurt you.” There was a whisper. Isagi looked up slowly, seeing Rin had calmed down and was looking at him, defeated. “I…I’m not angry. I…accept your apology. Just don’t whore yourself out to people just to get them to forgive you, alright?!”

“I-I’m not!” Isagi stuttered, surprised at his reaction.

“Then why are you…” Rin gestured to him. “…doing such a thing?!”

“I, um,” Isagi hesitated, suddenly feeling guilty. “You said you wanted my body so I just assumed…”

Rin stared. He then sighed, slapping a hand over his eyes, looking beyond frustrated this time. It didn’t take him long to recover, placing his elbow on his knee, propping his chin in his palm and looking away from Isagi.

“I didn’t mean it like that…” Rin said quietly. His cheeks were slightly pink, making him look…adorable. “I just…wanted…”

Isagi waited, wanting to understand. He couldn’t understand Rin’s actions or his words. He said he wanted his body but didn’t want to do spicy things with him. Instead, he took him to a movie and dinner, paid for all of it, and when he was completely wasted, paid for the hotel without even touching him. The most they did was make out—

It sounded like a date.

Isagi blinked, somehow finally understanding.

Rin didn’t finish his sentence. He was silent and made no movement to continue talking. Isagi was growing impatient, wanting to know if Rin was actually treating this as a date and his entire ‘I want your body’ thing was him asking Isagi on a date.

“You didn’t finish your sentence.” Isagi suddenly felt bolder, finally seeing some light in this mystery and confusion. There was no other reason for it. “What did you want?”

“Nothing!” Rin replied sharply, dismissing him with a wave of his hand. He got up and began to walk away. “I’ll check the front desk to see where our laund—”

Isagi grabbed his sleeve. Rin snapped his head to him, looking offended and at first, Isagi thought he was going to punch him. However, the more he examined his face, the more he realized that hidden behind Rin’s anger, was perhaps…embarrassment?

Maybe he was looking at the wrong conclusions after having such thoughts but if it was true…

“What do you want?” Isagi repeated. “What did you want to do with my body?”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake—”

“If you don’t tell me, I’ll just keep assuming the worst!” Isagi interrupted much to Rin’s shock. “Either you want sex or want to kill me – that’s the only reason you would say such a thing!”

“What the fuck?! Neither!” Rin looked aghast at his response. “I don’t want either!”

Goddammit. So Rin didn’t want to sleep with him.

There goes Isagi’s fantasies.

“So what is it?” Isagi asked. He didn’t understand. Did he just want to…hang out then? But, despite his blurry memories, he remembered how hot and sloppy those kisses were. Even in his drunken state, he could never forget how much Rin’s touch burned him with his hands touching his face and his waist. No one who just wanted to hang out would do that to another guy like that unless there was some interest! 

“Nothing!”

“It’s obviously not nothing if you said it in the first place!” Isagi kept insisting. What did Rin want from him?! “Just tell me!”

“Do you even know what you’re doing or who you’re talking to?!”

His boss. Isagi had to remember that. Rin was still his boss and probably a member of the yakuza. He would be fired or worse, could be killed for his insolence. Even though Rin said he didn’t want to kill him, if he pushed him enough, he could easily change his mind.

But Isagi hated not knowing.

“I’m talking to someone who seemed to have brought me out on a date and kissed me like he hadn’t been kissed in so long last night.” Isagi snapped back and he could see Rin’s face turn completely red. “All I want to know is what your intentions were and if you meant to go that far or did you make a mistake? If I’m reading the signs all wrong, then I’m sorry. I…really enjoyed our time together last night.”

It was true. Despite Isagi’s inner desires, it turned out that his intimidatingly sexy boss was so nice. Their conversation wasn’t easy but he was still polite and listened to Isagi. He was rough around the edges but he didn’t blame him for that, aware that he could be with his probable occupation.

“You…enjoyed it?” Rin asked calmly as if he couldn’t believe him. “You…actually enjoyed it?”

Isagi nodded. “I got too excited with the all-you-can-drink and indulged too much but…yeah, I did enjoy what we had yesterday.”

At that moment, it seemed like Rin’s guard dropped just a little. He pursed his lips, eyes switching back to Isagi then avoiding him like he couldn’t figure out what to do. He looked down at his sleeve that Isagi was still holding onto.

“…hand.”

“I’m sorry?” Isagi asked, not hearing what Rin mumbled. Panic appeared on Rin’s face and he wondered if what he said was so egregious that he looked like that.

“…hold your hand…” Rin muttered and Isagi swore he could see steam coming out of his ears. “I want to hold your hand!”

Isagi paused, staring at Rin, wondering if he actually said that. He looked down at the hand holding his sleeve, released it, then grabbed his hand.

“Like this?” Isagi asked, trying not to laugh. It was such an innocent request, he was surprised. “Is that all?”

Rin’s eyes widened, looking at their linked hands. He didn’t move away, a good sign in Isagi’s opinion.

Despite Rin holding such a cool aura, one that could make anyone that stepped into Emerald cower and exuded power that no one was willing to mess with him, maybe underneath, he was actually quite…shy? His red faces, his panicking expression, his stubborn gaze – Isagi had never seen them at the casino and never expected he would have such a thing. He always came off as controlled, knowing how to act and knowing how to intimidate. This man in front of him felt closer to Isagi than what he was like at night.

“Can…I ask for more?” Rin asked hesitantly. Isagi smiled, endeared by how flustered he seemed to be, and gave a nod. “Then…your body…”

Isagi snorted, trying not to laugh. They were back at the start but this time, Isagi knew that he wasn’t going to mistaken his intentions this time.

“If you say it like that, it makes me think you want to do something nefarious with my body.” Isagi said, stepping forward closer to Rin. He saw his eyes widen and kept his laughter in. It was fun teasing him. “If that’s not what you mean, maybe different words…?”

Rin looked like he was struggling though Isagi wasn’t sure if he was struggling with his words or with the distance between them. He looked away from him and exhaled.

“Then…” Rin trailed off. He turned back to Isagi, looking him in the eyes. “Can we meet again? Outside of work.”

He was charmed. Isagi was positively charmed by Rin and he wasn’t sure why. Sure, he was attractive and exactly his type, but he was awkward, had poor communication, and had moments where he could scare the living daylights out of him. But he also treated him well; he didn’t make a move without permission, and he showed concern for him.

This man was possibly a yakuza but Isagi was smitten.

“Sure.” He said with a laugh. He tightened his hold on Rin’s hand, smiling up at him. “I would love to.”

Isagi hummed happily as he got into the changing room of Emerald. Bachira and the others were already there, his friend eyeing him suspiciously.

“Yo, Isagi.” Bachira greeted him, completely dressed in his work uniform. “You seem quite pleased with yourself. Did something happen?”

“Hmm?” Isagi hummed as he placed his clothes in the locker. He was smiling. “Nothing in particular.”

“You can’t lie to me.” Bachira replied, leaning on the locker next to Isagi’s. His grin was menacing. “Tell your bestie what happened~”

“Maybe later.” Isagi laughed. He was too happy and couldn’t even feel nervous about Bachira learning he was going to ‘lend his body’ (go on a date) with the boss again. He barely even knew the man but was giddy, thinking about how shy Rin became when he agreed to meet him again. He wanted to keep that to himself a little longer if he could.

“Boo! That’s not fair!” Bachira whined as they exited the room, and headed to the casino for their meeting.

Karasu went through the meeting, clarifying some points and rules, explicitly making sure to mention no cheating unless someone has been winning a lot, then they could do what they needed to slow down their winnings. Karasu seemed to glance over at Isagi for a moment when covering this point but looked away. He then continued to discuss dealing with patrons’ conduct and reminding everyone how to deal with it when they got rowdy.

After the meeting, everyone went to their stations to prepare. Once set up was done, Isagi placed his mask on and the doors opened.

It was the weekend so it was busier than ever. Isagi was going to stay the entire time, until four in the morning, then longer due to cleaning up. It was exhausting but at least it was lively so Isagi could keep his eyes open.

He tried to hide his genuine smile when Rin entered, out of that horrendous leopard print shirt and into a nice suit with a simple shirt, the first few buttons open, exposing his collarbone. Isagi was lucky he got to see a bit more when he wore the robe but even at the hotel when they got their clothes back, Rin went to change in the bathroom instead.

One day, Isagi would see it all.

“Welcome, boss.” Isagi greeted with a small bow as Rin took his seat. “How much are you betting today?”

“A thousand and we’ll see from there.” Rin replied, throwing in the appropriate chips.

“Yes, sir.”

The night went on. Isagi did get dismissed for a break to chow down on his riceball and drink some tea but it was only for so before he headed back to his station. Rin had left not long after his break and Isagi was a bit disappointed he didn’t stay a bit longer. He pushed that away because he knew Rin was busy. He had to make sure the rest of Emerald was functioning and he was sure there were other businesses he had to attend.

When the customers finally left and they had to do the clean up, Isagi felt a small sense of relief and achievement. He had gotten used to this job by now and made very few mistakes. He actually felt at ease dealing with most of the patrons now and sensing anything problematic. He still had to work on being more alert when it came to cheating but there were eyes all over that were able to see.

Isagi almost collapsed when they got to the changing room, the tension in his body disappearing to prepare him for bed. When he opened his locker, he just stared at the bottled sports drink on the shelf before realizing he didn’t have that in there before.

He took it out carefully, and turned it around. A small smile appeared on his lips, reading the note hastily written on the label.

Take care.

He snickered. He opened the cap, the bottle giving a satisfying hiss and snap, and drank some of it. It was still a bit cool, the flavour sweet but not too sugary.

It was quite refreshing.

The next time he met Rin outside of work, they went shopping. Isagi insisted, especially since Rin showed up in a tiger striped shirt this time.

There was only so much Isagi could handle.

“Is there something wrong with what I’m wearing?” Rin asked, his voice slightly offended when Isagi requested that they went shopping to buy him some clothes. “These are pretty expensive.”

Expensive? How could something so ghastly be expensive? Isagi was no expert when it came to fashion but he at least had the sense of the common man.

“I just thought it would be nice if you wore something I picked out.” Isagi replied sweetly. It was a half-truth. Although he wanted to shop so he wouldn’t have to look at those atrocious shirts, he also wanted to be able to dress Rin how he imagined in his fantasies. 

It was silent and he thought Rin had caught him in his lie. However, when he glanced up at him, he saw the conflict on his face and the slightly pink cheeks.

Ever since Isagi realized what Rin’s intentions were, it became easier to read him.

“…fine.” Rin begrudgingly said. “But if I look like shit, don’t complain!”

Isagi nodded and nudged him with his elbow. “You won’t. You’ll look good in everything.”

‘Except those stupid shirts.’

Rin didn’t say anything but his eyes were glancing down at Isagi’s arm. He picked up on it but now that it was daytime, it was a little embarrassing to do anything daring in public.

Isagi allowed his hand to brush Rin’s and based on how Rin stiffened, he felt it. Just for a few seconds, allowing each other to bump into each other, Isagi hooked his pinky with this.

It was brief and they separated quickly after but Isagi could feel his heart beating through his ears like a quick, steady drum.

They went into one shop that had some normal casual clothes and Isagi headed to the racks. He usually wore a medium when it came to men’s but Rin was taller than average and had more muscle build than him so he would probably fit a large or extra large.

He wondered if that applied to down there as well—

Stop.

He glanced over at Rin, hoping he wasn’t able to hear his thoughts but just saw him looking through a rack, passing by reasonably nice ones without any interest.

He had to focus. He had to get rid of that horrible tiger print shirt and get him in something presentable. Isagi wasn’t embarrassed about walking down the street with him with that face and figure but those clothes.

“What about this?” Isagi asked as he lifted up a simple grey turtleneck. It would be a good base so he could add something like a blazer or jacket with it.

“Boring.” Rin replied as he merely glanced at it. He looked displeased with Isagi’s choice. “This place is expensive when they only have stuff like this.”

“But the quality must be good!” Isagi replied. He touched the soft fabric of the shirt. “It seems comfortable too! I think you would look good in it.”

And very quickly, Rin’s displeasure changed. He pursed his lips.

“…fine. I’ll try it.”

Rin didn’t argue with him as Isagi pulled out more clothes for him to try. He could see that he was holding back, his expression of disgust coming out with each thing Isagi grabbed but he kept his mouth shut. Isagi didn’t think he had bad taste when it came to clothing but at least he dressed like a law-abiding citizen!

“Let’s start with these.” Isagi stated with a nod. He got a few pairs of simple pants and shirts and grabbed one of the light blue long jackets that probably would go well with Rin’s long legs. They walked up to the worker near the dressing room. “Excuse me, he’d like to try on some clothes.”

The worker looked up from folding some clothes and glances over at Isagi then Rin. He nearly jumped, body suddenly shaking and directed them to one of the booths. “T-This way, sir! Please take your time!”

Isagi smiled though he felt bad, knowing how terrifying Rin looked with a scar on his face and his displeased expression despite the horrendous shirt. They got brought to one of the changing rooms and Isagi gave Rin the clothes.

“Show me when you’re ready!” Isagi said, a little too excited to see Rin in some real casual clothes. “I’ll look around for more!”

When the curtain closed, Isagi wandered, looking for belts and accessories as well. Rin also had a piercing in his right earlobe but he didn’t wear anything fancy, just a simple stud. He also wore an expensive watch that was fine so Isagi couldn’t find fault with that except that it had a high risk of being stolen but Rin was Rin so it should be no problem.

He heard the curtain open a few minutes later and headed back. He stopped with a step still in motion, eyes widening and jaw dropping.

The simplicity of the clothes fit Rin well. Too well. He looked good in dark colours with the grey turtleneck accentuating his shoulders and chest, and the black jeans making his long legs longer, tight on the hip and thighs.

Oh God, the thighs.

Isagi wiped his mouth, feeling a little drool coming out. He finally found the courage to walk up to Rin, admiring him up close, feeling his heart beat faster.

Despite how good Rin looked, he didn’t seem impressed.

“This is dull.” Rin said. He looked in the changing room at the rest of the clothes.

“How about some colour then?” Isagi asked. He grabbed the light blue coat from the room and held it out for Rin who reluctantly placed it on. Once it was on, Isagi couldn’t help but gasp. “Perfect.”

Simple but elegant and still incredibly cool. If one was simply to walk past Rin on the streets, they would think he was a model and not someone who was dealing with anything illegal. It was amazing how much the atmosphere around him changed with just different clothes and Isagi felt his cheeks getting warmer the longer he stared at him.

Pleased was an understatement, however, Isagi wasn’t sure if he could control himself.

“Are you okay?” The worker popped his head in, making Isagi break out of his trance. When his eyes landed on Rin, his jaw dropped as well. “Sir, that suits you so well. Perhaps the best I’ve ever seen those clothes on anyone!”

“It’s…” Rin stopped, then glanced over at Isagi. “Perfect.”

The worker nodded, his entire demeanor completely different from before. “I absolutely agree!”

The worker didn’t linger long and went off but the compliment he gave Rin lingered on Isagi’s mind. Rin definitely set a standard when it came to these clothes and probably everything else that he had yet to try. He knew that when he wore them, all heads would turn to him and…

Isagi grimaced.

“Let’s change back.” Isagi said, a snap in his voice he didn’t mean. He pushed Rin in the changing room, closing the curtain behind himself. Rin turned around, looking at him in confusion.

“Isagi?” Rin questioned, his husky voice low. The concerned tone in his voice rang in Isagi’s ear and then he realized he had followed him inside the enclosed room.

Being so close to Rin’s body, he felt his body heat radiating off. Along with his soft yet rough voice and those clothes that fit Rin too well, Isagi couldn’t resist.

He reached up, placing his arms around Rin’s neck and pulled him down, their lips meeting. He heard Rin gasp and felt a small tug as if he was trying to pull away but that was quickly abandoned when he felt Rin’s lips melt into his and his arms go around his waist.

Isagi had no idea how long they had been in there, adjusting their mouth position over and over, hungry to taste every crevice of each other. They parted a few times only to catch their breaths before diving in once more, addicted to each other’s flavour. The one bad thing about these clothes was that everything was covered up. Isagi could only feel Rin’s skin in a few places but it wasn’t enough.

He reached for the band of Rin’s jeans, pulling out the turtleneck tucked inside. He felt Rin gasp against his mouth when his hands went up the shirt, touching his stomach and feeling the beautifully formed muscles there. He had seen them at the hotel but never touched them, only imagining what they would be like and now that he could feel them with his hands, he wanted to feel them against the rest of his body.

But before he got a chance to, Rin’s hands were on his shoulders, pushing him back.

Isagi looked at him in confusion and disappointment, expecting Rin to be into as well considering what they were just doing. However, that disappointment quickly dissipated away when he saw that Rin’s face was as red as tomato, eyes glazed and conflicted, looking completely embarrassed.

“N-No.” Rin managed to say. He grabbed Isagi’s hands and placed them away from his body. “N-Not now.”

Not now. So that meant…Rin was willing? Later?

Isagi couldn’t lose this chance.

“When?” He asked, stepping forward. He didn’t think it was possible but Rin’s face got darker. “T-Tonight?”

“I…” Rin became flustered at Isagi’s suggestion. He turned away from him, staring at the pile of clothes he had yet to try. “Later!”

Isagi was unceremoniously shoved out of the changing room, Rin closing the curtain as if it was a door that could keep Isagi out. It technically couldn’t but even Isagi could read the room and knew that Rin didn’t want him there with him at the moment.

Even so, he didn’t feel disappointed in that. In fact, he was absolutely giddy, remembering Rin’s reaction, his flustered face, how his tongue felt with his and how hot his skin was. Rin denied him to do it now but he didn’t deny him to do it forever. That was promising for the future.

The problem was Isagi had to prepare. He wasn’t sure what size Rin wore down there.

Isagi sat on his bed with his legs folded underneath, arms crossed and looking at the two packages in front of him. He knew he should’ve waited until it was officially ‘later’ but he got so impatient. He was just so…curious to know the difference. How big of a difference were they? If it expanded, would either one of them fit? He could be completely off and Rin had a smaller size but…Isagi’s instinct told him that it definitely wasn’t.

The large size, he was able to find at the convenience store. He felt a bit embarrassed doing so, not looking at the cashier as they scanned it. He instantly regretted it when, even at the drugstore, they ran out of extra large so he had to buy it online anyways. He could’ve saved some face by ordering the large size at the same time but he was stupid.

He experimented. Tested things out. Filled each size with water and various sized bananas and cucumbers and watched as each expanded to see how big it would be and as the extra large got bigger and bigger, Isagi just couldn’t imagine it.

It was fucking huge.

“Holy shit.” Isagi stared at the expanded extra large, wondering how on Earth such a monstrosity would actually exist. It must if they sell this size but…Isagi couldn’t remember if he had met someone with such a size before, in his past relationships or when he caught glimpses of it in the locker room and showers during his time on the soccer team. If someone used this massive weapon of mass destruction, wouldn’t it hurt like hell?!

Isagi stared.

He would pack a few with him next time he and Rin went out.

They didn’t use them. Rin’s ‘later’ never came as all the dates they had after never reached that level.

A walk at the park followed by a boat ride in the river; visiting some shrines and temples to take in the views; going to the aquarium; going to the zoo – Isagi enjoyed every single one of them and it definitely brought him and Rin closer. Rin was a man of few words, listening mainly as Isagi talked but was enough to keep the conversation going and Isagi managed to learn a few things about him.

His preferred ochazuke was bream. He liked the colour blue. He often got in trouble when he was a child from breaking toys. He had an older brother.

Every detail Isagi learned, a piece of his heart felt like it was being filled up. He treasured each thing he knew about Rin, keeping them in mind. He especially remembered his birthday, already considering gifts early but Rin was rich and could buy anything he wanted. Maybe instead, Isagi could do something for him…

Rin was a man of few words but his actions spoke louder than words could ever convey. He always started off hesitantly, a slight brush against Isagi’s hand, as if afraid that he would offend him. Isagi noticed and in response, brushed back with a bit more force, giving him permission and then that’s when Rin would take a step forward, hooking their pinkies together.

It took a while during the date until Rin would actually fully grab his hand, almost at the end. Isagi tried to be patient, but it was driving him mad that he had to repeat this pattern every single time, Rin not just grabbing it at the beginning. Isagi had expected, with how many dates they’ve been on, that Rin would be grabbing his waist more freely now but he didn’t even do that unless Isagi initiated a hot, sloppy kiss. And when it got to the good part, Rin would stop, his face red and completely overheating, leaving Isagi unsatisfied.

Rin was a fucking master at edging and not in a good way.

When Isagi started dating Rin, he had an idea of his reputation and the rumours circulating around him. He still had that commanding aura when at Emerald and conducted business there without problems. He was quick with the decisions and observant when it came to the patrons’ moods, dealing out punishment and consequences when needed. His cold gaze when dealing with troublemakers was terrifying and it both scared Isagi and turned him on.

So Isagi didn’t expect Rin to be so…

Pure.

Any time Isagi wanted to push it further, he would be rejected, saying that they could do it ‘later’. It has been eight ‘laters’ already and still nothing! How long was he supposed to wait?! He was trying to be considerate, thinking that maybe Rin was just not ready.

But with how many dates and makeout sessions they’ve had, how could he not?!

Isagi had to take things into his own hands.

It was a night when Rin had his car, dropping Isagi off at home after a date. However, even though they arrived in front of his apartment, Isagi didn’t move from the passenger seat. He turned to Rin, determination in his eyes as he grabbed his collar and pulled him for a kiss.

The good thing was, when Isagi initiated the kiss, Rin now almost instantly responded back. He loved the feeling of Rin’s hand on his waist and back, pulling him in as if he would escape. He loved how Rin learned to nip at his lip just a bit, creating a sensation in his body he didn’t think he could experience from a mere kiss. He loved that Rin was rough with his kisses but still soft with his touches, acting like he was some delicate treasure.

He wanted to know if that’s how Rin would act in bed.

“Rin.” Isagi managed to breathe after they parted for some air. He leaned forward, lips near Rin’s ear. “Do…you want to come in?”

Almost instantly, Rin’s heavy pants disappeared and Isagi thought he stopped breathing. However, he knew better and knew that Rin was merely flustered at his suggestion so he pressed his lips against his jaw, kissing it.

“Come…in?”

“In my apartment.” Isagi replied quietly, rubbing his nose where he had kissed him. “I don’t want to part from you.”

“A-Ah.”

There was silence. Isagi knew that Rin was fighting internally but he didn’t want him to fight this way. He wanted Rin to continue kissing him.

“I feel a little lonely without you.” Isagi gave a small whine, burying his face in his neck. He knew he was playing dirty as he was highly aware that Rin liked it when Isagi touched him. It was the permission he needed to continue and Isagi wanted to emphasize that it was okay to touch him more. “Please?”

He felt Rin’s body tense and when he finally thought he managed to convince Rin to come to his apartment, he pushed him away again.

Isagi wasn’t even disappointed anymore. He was just so sad that Rin didn’t want to take the next step with him. But when he was about to bid Rin farewell for the night, Rin drove off quickly, surprising Isagi.

Before Isagi got a chance to ask, Rin turned into a parking lot near the apartment and parked. He got out with his wallet and went to the ticket machine then came back, placing it on the dashboard.

“Are we still going to your apartment?” Rin asked when Isagi didn’t move.

Isagi blinked, processing the last couple of minutes before smiling. He exited the car and freely latched himself on Rin’s arm as there was no one around.

“Of course!” Isagi laughed, anticipation building in his chest. “You’re always welcomed!”

Isagi realized belatedly, as they entered his small apartment, that he didn’t clean up. There were clothes and books on the floor, empty beer cans on the kitchenette counter, and the dishes he hadn’t washed that morning because he was almost late meeting Rin. His apartment was also very small, just a single room and a bathroom, so all the mess was exposed no matter where they went.

He hastily kicked off his shoes and started bundling his clothes in a pile.

“Sorry about the mess!” Isagi said as Rin entered. He was so embarrassed by this state, especially since Rin appeared to be a clean person. He usually didn’t have a problem keeping his apartment clean so why was it today of all days he had to look like a slob?! “It’s usually not this bad. Have a seat on the bed and I’ll be with you in a moment.”

Isagi didn’t wait for him to reply, placing books on his small shelf, his clothes in a laundry basket and placing the cans in a bin for him to recycle later. He could probably do the dishes in the morning because right now, he had to take advantage of the fact that Rin was there, in his room, sitting on his bed.

“Sorry about that.” Isagi said as he finally finished up, sitting on the floor in front of him. Rin was on the edge of the bed, back straight, and was merely looking around. Isagi wondered if he left anything else embarrassing out. “It’s a bit small here and uh, not that fancy.”

“I don’t care.” Rin replied, glancing around. Isagi didn’t have much else except a folding table that he had put away and a TV on the side. Rin’s eyes landed on the bookshelf. “What…do you like to read?”

“Oh, um,” Isagi gave a sheepish grin. “It’s a bit childish but…manga.”

“What kind?” Rin asked without any malice. Although plenty of people read manga, there were still a lot of people that think it’s not something a working adult should read. And if they did, there was a certain image in their mind of what kind of person they were.

“Different kinds.” Isagi answered. He scratched his cheek. “Some fantasy, some action, old classics, that kind of thing. I actually worked in a publishing company before working at Emerald. I wanted to work in the manga department.”

“You…got laid off, right?”

“Yeah…” Isagi replied with a nod. “It was a company thing so it wasn’t just me. The industry is struggling with the rise of the internet so some of the work can be automated. I was still a bit of a rookie so I was just someone they could lay off easily without lowering the quality.”

Rin was silent and Isagi realized he made it awkward. He plastered on a smile, trying to keep the mood light.

“That’s all in the past! I need to live for the present and look forward to the future now!” Isagi said cheerfully with a laugh.

“Do you want to work in publishing again?”

Isagi paused at the question. It was a fairly steady office job doing something he loves. There was occasional overtime, especially when it came to events or deadlines but it was always interesting. Isagi loved it when a book he worked on got published and saw it at the bookstore, curious to see who would pick it up. He had hoped to continue with that job, hoping that the joy and emotions people felt when they read the story would be the same when he was a child, reading about the worlds these authors created.

“…yes.” Isagi was honest. Although working at Emerald was good money and there was never a dull moment, it wasn’t exactly secure nor was it his dream. “Are you going to fire me for that?”

“What? Why would I?” Rin looked offended that he would say such a thing. “I don’t expect the workers at Emerald to be the same in the next few years. It’s not exactly the kind of work someone will stay at for the rest of their lives.”

Rin wasn’t necessarily wrong at that observation and Isagi was glad he wasn’t offended that he wanted to leave in the future. When Isagi did, what would become of their relationship then? Right now, it was easy for them to meet as Rin could see him on his shift or during the days off in between. If he got a normal office job, they would see each other less, perhaps only reducing it to one or two dates a week. And at night when Rin seemed most active, Isagi wasn’t sure he would see him.

He leaned forward on his bed, placing his cheek against it while looking at Rin.

“What about you?” Isagi asked quietly. His face was close to where Rin’s hand was and he shuffled a little closer. “Is…what you’re doing right now what you want to do for the rest of your life?”

Rin never explicitly said what his job was. He only told him he was the owner of some clubs but that was very basic information since Isagi was his employee. He dodged the questions, keeping it vague, and Isagi knew why. Perhaps even Rin knew that he knew. It was a silent acceptance and Isagi knew he shouldn’t push it. 

“It’s not about wanting to do it,” Rin’s voice was a bit cold as he said that as if a barrier appeared. “I have no choice.”

Isagi’s own concerns about life were so minimal compared to Rin’s. He thought he had no choice but to get a job at Emerald due to his lack of employment and dwindling savings but he could have found another job eventually, one that was completely legal and with less risk. He even had the choice now to find a new job. When he saves enough money, he could find a new apartment, get a pet, read some new manga – there was so much he could potentially do in his life.

But Rin…

Isagi didn’t know much about working in the yakuza; however, he heard that loyalty was important. Any traitors found would be killed instantly, their death passing as an accident and no one would know what truly happened to them. Isagi didn’t know how high in the hierarchy Rin was but even if he was up there, he couldn’t escape because he was part of the group. If he left, what else was there for him? Would he be able to find a normal life or would he be killed?

Between the paths that laid ahead of Rin, staying was the best choice.

He couldn’t live a normal life.

He wondered if that was the reason he was interested in Isagi. Isagi wasn’t handsome or anything special. He had a face everyone in Japan had: dark hair, fair skin, not too skinny but not fat either – average in this country. He wasn’t an outstanding work nor was he one that slacked off; he did his job. Even his personality was simple; he thought of himself as a decently nice guy with morals, friendly, but not a party animal either. Isagi was the definition of normal.

A normal that Rin’s life didn’t have.

He stood up, looking down at Rin. Rin merely looked up at him, the coldness fading slightly as Isagi reached out to his face, leaning down to kiss him.

Isagi was usually the one that initiated all their kisses and touches. Rin would follow through once he had gotten permission and all of them were relatively innocent; a pinky hold, slight touch to his cheeks, a sweet kiss. Meanwhile, Isagi wanted something more passionate, craving to devour Rin and to be devoured at the same time. He loved running his hands up and down his torso and loved it even more so when he got a chance to see Rin’s flustered expression. He wanted to show him how much he wanted him – wanted to sleep with him.

This kiss was closer to Rin’s pace, sweet and innocent but it was still different. It was soft but hot, tame yet passionate. It made Isagi wish for more; more of Rin’s touches, more of Rin’s life; more happiness for Rin.

He wanted to make Rin happy.

Isagi found himself in Rin’s lap eventually, arms around his neck, kissing him at the same pace. There was more to this kiss than their previous ones and Isagi found himself getting addicted to it. Rin’s hands were on his waist, rubbing his sides gently and tenderly. Even with no words being said between them, something strange was communicated, their senses calm but overwhelmed.

“Isagi.” Rin whispered as he pulled away for a moment for a breath. He was flushed, eyes glazed and lips swollen and Isagi didn’t doubt that he looked exactly the same.

“Say my name.” Isagi replied, hugging him tightly. He buried his face into Rin’s neck, smelling his cologne, and exhaling, completely relaxed. “You know it, right?”

There was a small crack in Rin’s voice, a slight moment of hesitation.

“Yoichi.”

Out of all the times he had someone call his name during his past relationships, none of them had given Isagi such a feeling as Rin did. His heart was beating, almost bursting; his stomach felt like they had butterflies, a pleasant fluttering that made him excited; and then something hot down below, making him squirm.

Rin stiffened as if feeling Isagi pressing against him.

But through his pants, sitting in Rin’s lap, Isagi could feel something hard against him.

“A-Ah.” Rin was pushing him away again but Isagi wouldn’t let him. He held on around his neck tighter, sticking to him like he was a koala. “Isagi, we shouldn’t—”

“Yoichi.” Isagi said, facing him again. He placed his forehead against Rin’s then proceeded to kiss him on his cheek, and then nose. When he got close to his lips, he didn’t kiss them yet, letting their warm breaths mingle as they lightly grazed each other. “I like it when you call my name.”

The grip on Isagi’s waist tightened and he could feel Rin get harder.

“Yoichi.” There was a bit of strain in his voice as he said his name. He wondered what he’d be like without that restraint. “We shouldn’t do this.”

Isagi somewhat expected it. With how Rin acted, it was like he was afraid of hurting him. Despite how he liked how much Rin cherished him, he wasn’t a delicate object that could break with a single rough motion. He was a real person with real needs.

And he needed Rin.

“But I want to.” Isagi replied a little coyly. He kissed Rin on his eyelid and at the same time, moved his hips so his ass would rub against his hard on. Rin was completely still, even his hands stopped moving. “No good?”

“N-No g…” Rin stopped part way through as if he suddenly lost his voice. Isagi looked at him again and could see his eyes widening, lips in a thin line, and his Adam’s apple bobbing. “I…I can’t…”

Isagi wanted to throw a tantrum because it was so obvious that Rin wanted it too. How could he not when he was making out with him, on a bed, Isagi on his lap, and with a very clear erection against his ass?!

“I…” Rin hesitated a bit before looking down as if ashamed. “I’ve…never done it before. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

It took a moment for Isagi to process his words. Once he did, he jolted in Rin’s lap, the shock finally reaching him and he just stared at him. Rin wasn’t looking at him.

“What?” Isagi managed to say though he was stunned by the turn events. “You haven’t done…what?”

Rin clicked his tongue in annoyance but still chose not to look at Isagi. “You know…”

Isagi did know but it was still hard to believe.

“Sex?” Isagi clarified. A man like Rin? The boss of a hostess club? Who had the face of a model and the body of a god and could easily get anybody he wanted just by stepping in the room? Never having sex before?!

“Yes.”

Rin’s face was red. He removed one of his hands from Isagi’s waist and placed it over his face to hide it but Isagi had seen it already – the embarrassment, the shame, and the dismay. Isagi was definitely confused.

“Really?”

“How many fucking times do I need to say it?!” Rin snapped, causing Isagi to jump. He leaned back in surprise and felt himself falling backwards before Rin caught him, bringing him close to him again.

“I’m sorry.” Isagi said, both for his lack of balance and his question. “I just…I’m surprised. You look like you would’ve had tons of experience already…”

“What kind of impression did you have of me?!” Rin asked in shock, his face twisting in mortification.

“I mean, look at you!” Isagi gestured to him. “You’re so hot, and you own your own business – a hostess club, mind you. I would’ve thought you would’ve, I don’t know, done some things with a couple of your hostesses or others.”

Rin looked offended. “I would never. They’re employees.”

“Um, hello?” Isagi pointed to himself. “I am too.”

“I—” Rin blinked then blushed. He suddenly became quiet. “You’re different.”

Isagi tilted his head and blinked. “How?”

“Just…” Rin was reluctant to reply based on how much he was struggling to say anything. Isagi waited patiently, the thought of sex out of his mind as he now wanted to know how he was different. Good ol’ average Isagi was somehow different from all those hostesses.

Well, he knew that. All those girls were pretty and attractive, charming with their smiles, and knew how to talk their way into their patrons’ wallets. Isagi wasn’t like them at all but it didn’t mean he wasn’t that different from the employees in Emerald. All of them were in similar situations, looking for some good cash. Karasu knew how to hire decent workers too so it’s not like he was better than any of the others.

“Everything.” Isagi barely heard him. “Just…everything about you.”

“Hmm.” Isagi wasn’t satisfied with that answer. He pressed himself against Rin, trying his best to widen his eyes innocently. “Can you tell me more?”

“What the fuck—” Rin was taken off-guard by that act. He looked away. “You…”

“Please.” Isagi pleaded, voice sweet, trying to entice him.

Rin merely sighed, avoiding his eyes. It was a huge sigh too.

“You…” He stumbled on his words. “I didn’t really notice you at first. Karasu told me you were just hired so I went in to make sure there were no problems but you…your smile. Even though it was your first day, you smiled and managed to entice the guests. You easily got them to relax without much flattery, challenging them again and again to prove their worth. And you did the same for me even though I’m your boss and everyone cowers when they know I’m there. You treated me like anyone else, continuing to smile.”

His smile? It wasn’t enough to make him stand out amongst the rest but Isagi couldn’t help but be flattered that Rin seemed to take note of it.

“And then you cheated.” Ah. “I thought you had always been a bit of a pushover, pleasing the customers, but you actually had the guts to cheat to save your own life. It was a risk because if you were caught, you would’ve been fired or worse but you still kept going. I was intrigued. I thought you were more innocent than that but I was proven wrong.”

Rin finally looked at Isagi. “I was fascinated. Underneath that exterior of yours, you had a different side to yourself that I didn’t know about. I…wanted to know more about it. About you. I just didn’t think we’d get this far.”

“How far did we get?” Isagi asked cheekily. He smiled, kissing Rin on the forehead, his affection for him overtaking his chest.

“I’m not sure about you but…” Rin trailed off. He was silent. “I…I hold more affection for you than I thought I would.”

Isagi wondered if the feelings he had would be satisfied with the word ‘affection’. He doubted it, the feeling in his chest going beyond that, more than anything he had ever felt before. He felt affection for manga and the stories they told; he felt affection for his friends and family, but with Rin, it was something different. Something stronger.

“Rin.” Isagi’s voice was shaking. He inhaled and exhaled to calm himself down; to calm his trembling heart. “I love you.”

He had only known him for a short time. At first, it was just mere fantasies because he had a crush on his hot boss. After getting to know him, learning how considerate he was to Isagi, the small actions of flowers and sports drink, and how sweet he was despite his stoic expression, Isagi just felt the love grow even more.

He waited for Rin’s response, suddenly feeling nervous. He hadn’t meant to confess like that, the words slipping out naturally. It felt right at that moment, and it felt right to Isagi.

He loves Rin.

Rin stared blankly at him, too stunned to speak. He didn’t even move. Isagi was worried that he came off too strong too early. Rin held affection for him but it wasn’t necessarily love. Isagi probably jumped into it too quickly even though he thought Rin felt the same way.

“I…” Rin finally spoke. “I see.”

‘I see’. Was that it? Isagi could almost hear his heart shatter with that response. He removed his arms from Rin’s neck, making a motion to get off his lap so he could head to the washroom to cry, when Rin stopped him, grabbing his wrists.

“I…I don’t know if what I feel for you is love.” Rin spoke honestly, looking more frustrated in himself than anything. “I’ve never felt such a thing in my life so I can’t tell. All I know is that I have stronger feelings for you than anything I’ve ever encountered. If…if you could be patient, I want to learn to love you.”

It was strange how easily Isagi said he loved Rin, forgetting that he had a different life than him. Rin not knowing what love was almost broke him because how could someone not know? Did he not have anyone around him to show him? But even without feeling it before, Rin still wanted to love Isagi. He wanted to. Isagi was wanted by him.

“Of course.” Isagi agreed, placing his hands on Rin’s cheek. He gave him a peck on the lips, feeling his chest swell and tears forming in his eyes. “I’ll teach you as much as you want.”

Their kiss was slow with Rin being hesitant and Isagi being patient. It was like they were starting from a blank slate but neither minded, their hearts full as they took the time to explore each other’s mouths, running their hands through each other’s hair, and rubbing their noses together as they got lost in each other’s eyes. Isagi kissed him lightly on his face, putting as much care as he could in each one, wanting Rin to feel the love he had for him.

His mouth roamed down Rin’s jaw to his neck. He wanted to continue down to Rin’s shoulder and chest, risking going further down but didn’t, knowing that he needed time.

But unexpectedly, he felt Rin’s fingers slip under his shirt, grazing a small part of skin on his back.

When Isagi looked at him, he could tell he was embarrassed, not even looking at him. He stopped his hands after being caught but didn’t remove them either.

Isagi struggled to keep a straight face.

“Do…do you want more?” Isagi asked mischievously. He grabbed Rin’s hand, pushing it up in his shirt more, bringing it to the front so it was on his stomach. He then purposely grinded his hips, his ass pressing against Rin’s lap once more. “You can do it. Touch me.”

Rin’s head snapped up with an unidentifiable expression on his face. However, his eyes were sharp, reminding him of when they were at Emerald and Isagi could feel him watching him like he was some sort of prey.

Isagi felt himself take off his shirt without either one of them uttering a word. Rin’s hands were on his stomach and his eyes went to his skin. His hands were rough, the scar scratching his body, electrifying him all over. It started off simply by rubbing his waist and stomach, slowly going up his sides and to his chest. Isagi shivered despite how hot his touch was. His lower half was reacting, struggling to contain itself in his pants, yearning for Rin’s touch down there as well.

He waited though, feeling the hesitation in Rin’s touch, knowing that he was experiencing something new by touching Isagi’s body like that. Isagi tried to keep his breathing even but it got harder and harder as he continued to touch him, fingers grazing over his nipples, practically making him convulse. At that, Isagi became weak, hunching over and panting more heavily.

“Are you okay?” Rin asked with concern laced in his voice. Even in a situation like this where Isagi was willing to let him do anything to him, he still found the time to be considerate of him.

“Yeah, just…” Isagi paused before pressing himself closer to Rin, his hardening dick pressing against him. “Keep going.”

The flush on Rin’s face made him incredibly attractive along with the hunger in his eyes. However, he did lower his eyelids shyly but it just emphasized how pretty he was, especially with those long eyelashes.

Rin’s hands moved again, his fingers rubbing against every part of his skin. Isagi felt himself interchanging between pleasure and laughter when he hit a particularly sensitive part, but he never stopped Rin. He didn’t want to.

But Rin didn’t move beyond. Isagi felt himself panting more and more as Rin found some spots on his torso that made him groan. He looked at him, eyes pleading, but Rin was focused on his body, entranced by it. Isagi could feel Rin beneath him getting harder but he didn’t do anything to move forward.

Patience, patience, patience…

It was too hard.

Isagi leaned forward, slamming his lips against Rin and pushing him on his bed. He panted against them, going back and forth between kissing him and taking a breath. Rin’s hands moved up when Isagi shifted, putting more pressure on his nipples and Isagi found himself moaning against Rin’s mouth. Isagi places his own hands on Rin’s chest, fumbling around to find the hem of shirt and then forcefully pulling it over his head.

He had only seen Rin’s body once at the hotel but never the full thing. Isagi took a moment to look down at the man under him.

His body was better than Isagi remembered or even imagined. Firm muscles but not too big and not too small, perfectly proportioned with his slim figure but still making Isagi look small in comparison. The tattoo that Isagi was teased with covered his entire right shoulder, connecting his arm and his chest together. He gazed at the azure dragon that decorated his skin, entranced by the details of the scales, the legs, and claws, all while noticing the scars that surrounded it, and parts of them becoming one with the tattoo. His fingers traced the ink on his skin, then to the various scars, careful not to press them in case they still hurt. Rin didn’t stop him, giving Isagi permission to continue.

What caused these wounds? How many did Rin have? There were too many and Isagi’s chest ached at how many times Rin must have gone through…whatever he went through. There weren’t just scars that appeared to be cuts but also circular marks and things that had more shape to them. The small circular ones almost made Isagi think of cigarette butts but he couldn’t imagine someone doing that to Rin.

He also didn’t know what he went through.

Every scar had become part of Rin’s life, some older than others. Every single one of them was part of his past, part of his story, and each mark on his body was permanent. They were all part of who Rin was and it was terrifying to imagine.

But Isagi wasn’t terrified.

He adjusted himself so he was straddling him and not just sitting on his lap. Lowering his head, Isagi began to kiss Rin’s tattooed shoulder, following the lines to his chest, meeting each scar and mark it tried to hide. He continued to the other scars, kissing them gently, now understanding why Rin held onto him like he was a fragile object. There was something so precious and vulnerable about Rin at that moment that Isagi couldn’t help but want to be gentle. What kind of life did he live? What kind of life was he currently living? If Rin went through such a tough time, Isagi wanted to be the one to give him peace.

“Isagi.” Rin breathed out calmly. That was until Isagi’s mouth got to them of his pants, kissing above his crotch. “Yoichi.”

His name on RIn’s lips drove him crazy. Isagi went lower, finding himself on the floor once more but between Rin’s legs. He pressed his lips against the hardness in his pants, making Rin twitch. Rin didn’t tell him to stop so Isagi pressed a little more, kissing him softly at first then doing so with open mouth. In the silence of his room, he could hear Rin’s breathing getting shallower. He watched as the places Isagi kissed got slightly darker from his saliva. He wanted to make it completely dark, wetting the area and putting it in his mouth.

“Rin.” His voice croaked. He looked up and saw that Rin was now sitting up, watching him. “Can I…?”

He felt his heart beating like crazy, his own dick straining against his pants. He could just unbutton his own pants and jack off but he felt pathetic to do so when Rin was there, feeling it just as much as him. He looked up at him, placing his cheek on Rin’s hard on, pleading with his eyes. Rin scrunched up his nose as if he was going to reject but based on the look in his eyes, he wasn’t going to.

“Go ahead.”

Isagi’s hands were ready, practically leaping for his belt, undoing it in record speed, then taking out the button and unzipping his pants. Rin’s navy underwear was already slightly stained, not from Isagi’s saliva. Despite his initial speed, Isagi slowly reached for the hem of his underwear, heart beating, mentally preparing himself—

It was huge.

When Isagi tested out the large and extra large condoms, he had placed them on items he thought would be about Rin’s size. They were random guesses and it had him questioning whether he was crazy that it could even be that big.

But seeing it in real life, Isagi was not prepared.

“Holy fuck.”

Rin recoiled but Isagi held his thighs in place. Looking at Rin’s expression, the embarrassment was still there, adorably so. Isagi craned his neck up so he could kiss him on the lips, rubbing his thighs in a reassuring manner at the same time.

“What was that for?” Rin muttered though he didn’t resist the kiss. “Is it that bad?”

“No.” Isagi shook his head, realizing his mistake. Isagi felt his cheeks burn, glancing down at Rin’s weapon, the image in his mind completely shattered by the length, the girth, the hardness, how it just stood like that—

He could feel his dick crying out to be released.

“It’s perfect.” Isagi replied, lowering himself in front of it, placing his nose and cheeks against it, smelling Rin's sweat and cologne. The more he stared and felt it against his face, the faster reality was about to crash on him.

How was he going to fit that inside him?

He swallowed.

Slowly, Isagi took it in his hands, the erection twitching in his hand. He ran his tongue down it against the vein then swirling around, trying to cover every part. Rin’s thighs were shaking and Isagi could hear him trying to keep his voice down and before he knew it, cum had splattered out, landing on Isagi’s face.

Isagi blinked, surprised by how quick that was. He looked up at Rin and saw him covering his face.

“…I said I haven’t done it before.” Rin mumbled, not removing his hands. “Fuck.”

Isagi didn’t feel disappointed but actually felt pleased with how quickly Rin came. That meant he did well, right? Or at least, Rin was turned on by him enough that it was instantaneous.

He giggled.

Leaning forward, Isagi took the tip in his mouth this time. He watched Rin remove his hands, looking down at him in horror. Isagi moved his lips, giving it a massage, his tongue doing most of the work, licking around the foreskin. He slowly moved his way down his dick, gently scraping his teeth against it, making Rin hiss and gasp. At some point, Rin’s hands landed on his head, grasping his hair as if he wanted to pull Isagi off but he didn’t. He tugged gently, the slight pain like a massage on his scalp, and mixing in with the noises Rin made, Isagi’s dick was demanding its release.

With his other hand, Isagi undid his own pants, tucking the hem of his underwear underneath his balls. With one hand on Rin’s thigh, steadying himself as he lowered his mouth on his dick and the other on Isagi’s, he moved them at the same time in the same slow motion up and down. There were moments where he stopped so he could catch his breath, but they didn’t last long, trying to take Rin in as much as possible

Rin’s grip on his hair tightened painfully but Isagi didn’t stop – he didn’t want to stop, the challenge of trying to take the entire thing in his mouth egging him on. He could feel Rin trembling from pleasure, his laboured breaths getting louder.

“Isagi.” He was annoyed that he didn’t call him Yoichi but he didn’t remove his mouth to correct him. “I’m…I’m going to cum again.”

He tugged Isagi’s hair, trying to pull him away. Isagi released his own dick, the precum leaking out, and placed his hand on Rin’s other thigh, pushing himself to suck on his dick. Rin’s moans got louder when the tip hit the back of Isagi’s throat. He still didn’t have the full thing in but it was enough. Isagi repeated the motion, going back and forth on his erection, letting the tip hit him each time.

“Isagi, stop!” Rin yelled but his voice, so clouded with lust, was contradicting him. “B-Before I…I…”

Isagi felt something gush against the back of his throat and knew that Rin had cummed. He removed his mouth slowly, saliva and cum connecting his lips and the tip of Rin’s penis.

He swallowed automatically to clear his throat. It took him a moment to realize what he did.

“Oh.”

“What the fuck?!” Rin shouted and grabbed his shoulders. He looked furious. “Why did you swallow it?! Is that even safe?! Spit it out!”

“I…” Isagi was shocked. Even with his past relationships, he never swallowed semen. The taste was salty and didn’t appeal to him, making his mouth feel completely gross. Anytime he obliged with a blowjob, he would try to avoid getting cum in his mouth, letting it go before they could. He got into a few arguments with his past partners about this and just ended up not doing many blowjobs for them. “I don’t feel sick?”

“Wait a minute.” Rin sighed. He grabbed his phone that was in his back pocket and started typing away. It took him another minute, reading something on it, before he sighed in relief. “It should be harmless. Since I haven’t had any…sexual relations before, there should be no issues. But if you feel sick, don’t force yourself!”

Isagi couldn’t help but laugh. Even in this moment when Rin experienced pleasure, he was concerned about him.

He really loved him.

Isagi straightened, still kneeling between his legs but he raised himself up so he was closer to his face. His hands were on Rin’s thighs, loving the feeling of his muscles, wanting to run his hands all over, but he was just so endeared by Rin’s worried expression, he couldn’t help but stare.

“If that’s the case, can we continue?” Isagi asked, tilting his head, trying to act cute. It seemed to work because Rin’s face became red. It might as well become permanent at this point.

“C-Continue…” Rin spluttered. After a few seconds of silence, he nodded.

Isagi grabbed Rin’s pants and underwear at the same time, pulling them off along with his socks. He gave into his own pleasure at that moment, caressing Rin’s thighs, admiring how perfectly shaped they were. The pants Rin wore didn’t give them any justice; Isagi wanted to just squeeze his face with them at all times but now wasn’t the time. He wanted Rin to feel good.

He stood up, discarding pants and underwear, dropping them on the floor, his and Rin’s eyes locked the entire time. The heat of his gaze was overwhelming, not at all faltering despite how red his face was, and there was a flash of change going from embarrassed to hungry.

He wanted Rin to devour him.

Both of them were now naked, able to see everything about each other. Isagi’s eyes went from his cock, hard once more, too big for Isagi’s mouth but making him curious if it could fit inside elsewhere. His eyes travelled to his toned body, to his tattoos, to every scar that he had kissed and then to the ones he hadn’t yet kissed. Every part of Rin, Isagi wanted to claim for his own and judging by Rin’s eyes, he wanted to do the same to him.

Isagi kneeled on the bed, straddling him, and sat down in his lap once more. He wrapped his arms around Rin’s neck and Rin placed his hands on the bed to keep himself steady as Isagi balanced his weight on him. Once he found a comfortable position, Isagi leaned forward to kiss him.

Rin’s hands started roaming his body, perhaps the first time he initiated touch without asking for permission. He felt it on his stomach and waist, then to his back and then landing on his ass. Isagi moved his hips a bit, trying to sit on his hands to hint where he wanted to be touched but Rin didn’t get it as they laid still.

‘Goddammit.’ Isagi thought but still continued to passionately kiss him. He pressed his body against his, feeling Rin’s cock on his stomach, next to his own. He wiggled his hips slowly, controlling the pace of his own cock rubbing Rin. The touch was enough to send a sensation down Isagi’s back, his asshole puckering, wanting to get something in there.

“God fucking dammit!” Isagi suddenly shouted, nearly crying at how stupid he was. He had the condoms – two different sizes in fact! The mood was really good and then he realized… “I forgot to buy lube!”

He was so close. He was just an idiot for forgetting to buy it.

“We…we can try again next time.” Rin muttered quietly. He exhaled. “I can study until then.”

The tears that Isagi wanted to shed instantly disappeared when he said that, bursting into laughter. He hugged Rin’s head, bringing it to his chest.

He was just too cute.

“Alright.” Isagi chuckled. There was a bit of disappointment but it was fine. It allowed Rin to be prepared, especially since it was his first time. “I can also take the time to practice. I’m not sure I can fit all of you inside me.”

The crude language made Rin react, his shoulders even becoming red this time. Isagi felt his penis getting harder and bigger if possible and he looked between them, shaken by the size.

Perhaps it was better for them to not fully get it on today. Isagi didn’t want to rip his ass in half. He wanted to be able to move the next day at least.

But it didn’t mean they couldn’t enjoy it further now.

Isagi reached for Rin’s hard cock, still slightly wet from his mouth earlier. Isagi’s erection was pressed against and he took both of them in his hands, motioning up and down, rubbing them together. Rin’s hands went on his hips as if to keep him steady. The pressure and friction sent something in Isagi’s nerves and he couldn’t help but speed up to feel it again and again in a constant wave. He could see Rin feeling it as well, his own hips jerking, causing Isagi to bounce along with him, creating more motion.

Isagi screamed, feeling his senses getting overwhelmed; the pressure of his hands with his dick against Rin’s; Rin’s constant motion, making his hands move more; the slapping of Isagi’s ass against Rin’s thigh; Rin’s scent oozing more than ever; and watching as Rin clearly enjoyed himself despite his efforts to hide it.

He was so close; Rin had already cummed and made a mess of Isagi’s hands, but still was rock hard. Isagi thought he could go on for longer until one of Rin’s hands reached up to his chest, playing with one of his hard nipples, goosebumps rippling on his skin.

“Rin, Rin, Rin!” Isagi felt his voice getting louder each time he called his name. Everything felt so good, his sanity was slowly deteriorating.

“Isagi.” Rin’s voice was a harsh whisper. “Yoichi.”

That did it.

Isagi shuddered and stopped when cum shot out, coating their stomachs and Isagi’s hands, mixing with Rin’s. Isagi couldn’t move, his body going limp after that. He rested his head on Rin’s shoulder, his hands falling to his side before embracing him lightly. Rin fell back on the bed and both of them just laid there, listening to each other’s breathing and heartbeats.

BANG BANG BANG

Isagi nearly jumped out of Rin’s arms, turning to his wall where the noise came from.

“KEEP IT DOWN OVER THERE!” He heard the voice of his neighbour yell.

“S-Sorry!” Isagi called back, the embarrassment setting in. He had completely forgotten how thin the walls were and he had made a lot of noise just now. He saw Rin’s face was pink but he was sure he was worse.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Isagi cursed quietly, now afraid he was too loud in a whisper. He saw his neighbour sometimes when dropping off his trash and recycling. They greeted each other once in a while and now, whenever they meet, Isagi won’t be able to look at them without feeling embarrassed. “I’m going to die.”

Rin was silent but had lifted his hand to Isagi’s hair, stroking it softly.

“No, don’t die.” Rin whispered. Isagi placed his face in his chest. “We…said there’d be a next time.”

Isagi wasn’t sure if Rin knew how easily his words comforted him or cheered him up but just from him saying that, out of his own volition and wanting to have a next time meant that they had some mutual feelings. Rin still didn’t say ‘I love you’ like Isagi did but there was no denying that whatever feelings he had were strong enough that he wanted to try again and further their relationship.

It was enough for now.

Life continued with occasional dates, not yet progressing further. There were times they tried to push it, Rin eventually getting comfortable with Isagi’s touch even if it was just his hand or mouth. Isagi had even used his ass at one point, rubbing it up and down Rin’s exposed cock, his asshole pushing against the tip but Rin had quickly cummed before Isagi had a chance to even attempt to put it in.

Even though Isagi wanted to try again, Rin was just so flustered that he stopped.

“We’re not doing it.” Rin shook his head, looking frustrated. “Not like this. I…need to train more.”

Isagi really didn’t mind that Rin was an early shooter but he could see that it was affecting his mood so he let it happen. Despite how lost Rin seemed to feel, Isagi still kissed him, satisfied with just laying naked next to him.

“You lasted longer this time.” Isagi said, intending for it to be a compliment. He smiled. “The training seems to be working. Maybe we should train together—”

“That’s counterproductive.” Rin interrupted seriously. “If we do, I won’t even last a minute each time I try.”

Isagi blinked, surprised by his bluntness. Rin didn’t have any shame saying that, saying it with a straight face. Isagi’s chest fluttered as he chuckled nervously, bashful at his words.

“I see…” Isagi whispered. He leaned forward, kissing Rin on the lips, running a hand up and down his arm. “Well, I’m looking forward to the results then.”

Isagi tried not to look stupid when he smiled but it was hard not to. Rin was just so freaking adorable. It drove him crazy that Rin was just as crazy about him. It got harder and harder to see him during his shift because all Isagi wanted to do was make out with him and see how far he got with his ‘training’ but he resisted. 

Instead, he tried to hide his excitement whenever Rin came. He acted as normal as he could, dealing out the cards for the poker table, still patient when he waited for Rin. He didn’t arrive at the same time each night; sometimes he appeared at the beginning of the shift but mostly near the end, especially on the weekends where they went until the early morning. He didn’t stay for too long, at most being there for an hour, but usually left after a game or two. Ever since he and Isagi started dating, Isagi tried to stay professional even though all he wanted to do was jump his bones.

On one particular night, as it progressed, people got drunk and had to be brought out so they wouldn’t bother others. It wasn’t out of the ordinary as they had security to help out. Some got rowdy due to their losses but they were quickly taken care of. It was normal but there was one problem.

Rin never came.

Isagi kept glancing at the door when he saw someone enter from the corner of his eye. That distracted him a few times and forced him to actually focus on his job but it was hard when hours passed by and Rin didn’t make an appearance. He tried not to worry, after all, Rin was busy with his businesses. He couldn’t always be there even though Isagi didn’t remember the last time he never came on his shift.

During the next shift, Rin didn’t come.

It went from a week to three and Isagi was starting to panic. He messaged him, asking where he was but got no response.

“Did…he ghost me?” Isagi asked himself as he sat on his bed, staring at his phone with his unreplied messages. Rin didn’t even read them. “No, he couldn’t have…”

But it was so strange. They went from seeing each other practically every day to absolutely nothing. Isagi couldn’t help but be worried.

He frowned.

Rin had to be part of the yakuza. There was no way that he wasn’t and Isagi had to accept that fact. A tattoo-covered man with multiple scars operating various businesses – some of them illegal – and fairly unknown to the public despite having connections to various celebrities and politicians indicated such. Isagi had held onto the smallest possibility that Rin wasn’t part of one but he had no choice. And if that was the case, he could be in danger.

Isagi bit his lip. He searched through his contacts, finding Karasu’s number and called him.

“Isagi? What is it?” Karasu’s sleepy voice asked after a few rings. “Do you need to take off or something? You could’ve just texted.”

“Um, sorry for disturbing you, manager.” Isagi replied, suddenly feeling hesitant. Even though Karasu was employed by Rin, did he actually know about Rin being in the yakuza? And wait, wasn’t it bad if Isagi asked about him? Karasu wouldn’t know about them after all!

He just stayed on the phone, suddenly regretting calling Karasu. He didn’t think this through at all.

“Um, sorry, I made a mistake.” Isagi spluttered out, feeling bad. He just couldn’t ask Karasu about it. If Karasu didn’t know about them, then he shouldn’t reveal it, right? It was Rin’s personal life and he wasn’t sure what the relationship was between his manager and Rin.

There was silence on the other end for a moment and Isagi thought that Karasu had disconnected without saying bye.

“Don’t worry about it.” Karasu replied and that was when he disconnected.

Isagi just stared at the phone before placing it down on his bed. He placed his head on his knees, wrapping his arms around his legs.

“Stupid Rin.” Isagi muttered, his chest trembling. “Where the hell are you?”

He had fallen asleep not long after, mentally exhausted from all that worry. It was one of his days off anyways so he didn’t need to go to the casino that night. Even so, he didn’t sleep well, Rin was still on his mind, worry flowing through him enough that he just wanted to cry.

There was a sudden knock on his door that forced him to open his eyes. Isagi glanced over at the door, wondering if there was a mistake. He wasn’t expecting anyone as it didn’t seem right that someone would bother him.

But there was a knock again.

He slowly sat up, tilting his neck to crack it before walking over. He looked in the peephole of his door, eyes widening, suddenly awake. Isagi fumbled as he unlocked the door, opening it to see Rin standing there.

His appearance was a bit rough, hair messed up, and clothes unkempt, very unlike him. His shirt looked like it was hastily thrown on, buttons not matching the holes, and there were wrinkles on his blazer. He seemed paler and thinner than the last time Isagi saw him, his eyes looking a little lost.

“Isagi…” Rin began. He frowned, but it wasn’t out of anger. “Why didn’t you answer your phone?”

“I…” Isagi blinked. He wanted to ask Rin the same question and was a bit offended he beat him to it. “What about you? I’ve been trying to contact you for three weeks already!”

Rin didn’t respond immediately. His eyes were downcast as he continued to remain silent.

“Do you know how worried I’ve been?” Isagi asked, his voice suddenly cracking. Tears were forming in his eyes as he grabbed Rin’s collar, pulling him forward so he could look at him. “Every night, I wondered where the fuck you were. We went from nearly fucking to absolute silence. You stopped coming to the club too so I thought you didn’t want to see me anymore. And you didn’t even respond to my messages or calls! I thought we had something going on but then you completely ghosted me!”

“I…” Rin’s expression tried to remain neutral but Isagi could see his eyes were in pain. “I had my reasons.”

“You could’ve at least told me!” Isagi pushed him away, the tears flowing out freely down his cheeks now. He turned away to wipe them so Rin wouldn’t see. “Just a message telling me that you were busy. Or at least tell me that you didn’t want to see me anymore. Something. Then I wouldn’t have to worry. You didn’t say anything for three weeks and then showed up asking ‘why didn’t you answer your phone’?!”

He heaved. He shouldn’t be getting angry. Rin had his own life and all that so he must have been busy and he showed up in a complete mess but all the thoughts and feelings he had built up over the past few weeks, thinking that he had been abandoned just came out.

Isagi jumped when his neighbour’s door slammed open. He was pissed off, red eyes glaring at them.

“Isagi, keep it down!” He yelled, a vein popping out of his neck. “Some people are trying to relax here!”

“S-Sorry, Barou!” Isagi stuttered as he looked away. He still hadn’t been able to look him in the face since Rin was last over. “We’ll take it somewhere else.”

“You better!” Barou shouted as he slammed his door shut.

Isagi and Rin just stood there, neither saying anything. Isagi sighed, his head clearing up just a little.

“Are you willing to tell me why you didn’t contact me?” Isagi asked quietly, looking at Rin mournfully. “Did you really want to stop our relationship? I would appreciate it if you actually told me.”

Rin grimaced but didn’t say anything. Isagi waited but felt his heart slowly cracking the longer the silence lingered.

“Would you like to take a drive with me?” Rin asked him suddenly. He glanced over at Barou’s door before looking back at Isagi. “So we can talk privately.”

Isagi nodded. He went back inside and grabbed his wallet, keys, and phone, checking and saw that he had indeed missed several phone calls and messages from Rin while he was asleep. He placed them in his pockets and locked the door, following Rin to his car. When Rin took his seat, Isagi noticed him flinching before starting up.

The silence continued in the car, Isagi waiting for Rin to speak. It felt like he was always waiting for Rin. He waited for him after he didn’t contact him; he waited for Rin to be mentally prepared to take their relationship further; he waited for him to speak. Isagi was getting tired of it, wanting Rin to just take the initiative. He wasn’t big on words but his action showed that he wanted to be with Isagi, or at least, he thought so. He thought he was just shy, and considering he hadn’t had sex before, inexperienced when it came to having a relationship. He wasn’t surrounded by love and so he was hesitant. He thought he could wait for him but it was getting harder and harder.

“The past few weeks have been difficult.” Rin finally said, his eyes still on the road as he drove, the city lights slowly fading away. “I was in a…situation I couldn’t contact you in. It only got resolved recently.”

With how vague Rin was being, it must have something to do with the yakuza. Isagi understood why he wanted to keep it a secret and understood that it was none of his business but it sucked that he didn’t know. It felt like despite how close they had gotten, Rin was still keeping his distance from him.

“Rin.” Isagi began, looking down at his lap. “Do you see a future with me?”

“…what?”

‘I knew it.’ Isagi smiled bitterly. He didn’t know what he expected when he already knew what was to come. At the beginning, he knew that Rin was most likely yakuza which was why he was satisfied with his fantasies. He didn’t expect Rin to ask him out or for their relationship to develop; he didn’t expect to fall in love with him. Perhaps he had become too greedy with how gentle he was to Isagi or how he kept trying to please him the next time they met, but at one point, Isagi started to fantasize about a future with Rin.

They would have a cozy apartment together; they would have a dog or cat or even both; they would be living comfortably in each other’s arms.

But he knew that wasn’t possible.

“Maybe…” Isagi tried to keep his voice steady, tears threatening to come out again. He clenched his hands. “Maybe it’s better if we stopped seeing each other.”

The silence was deafening. It was hard to be in the car right now after saying those words. Isagi wished he could just escape and then he wouldn’t need to see Rin anymore. 

“No.”

Isagi was startled by that response, not quite expecting it. He looked at Rin who was frowning, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“It’s not better if we stop seeing each other.” Rin continued, his voice firm. By now, they were out of the city, driving up a winding road up a large hill. “I had things I had to take care of. I still want to see you.”

“You didn’t contact me.”

“I told you that I couldn’t.”

“So you expect me to accept that, causing me pain the entire time?!” Isagi yelled, feeling something break in him. “I was scared something happened to you. You don’t tell me a lot of things about your life so I can only assume the worst! You said you couldn’t contact me but you can’t even explain to me why you couldn’t after showing up again…”

Why couldn’t he let this go? He knew Rin had his secrets but he still wanted to know. He wanted to know every single thing about him, no matter how bad it was. He wanted to be Rin’s safe place, someone he would be able to open up to – someone he could feel the love from. He already told him he loved him but now that he felt that way, maybe his love had become too conditional – conditional to if Rin was willing to be honest with him.

“I was hospitalized.” Rin suddenly said, his expression telling Isagi that he never intended to reveal that. “I was out for the first week and have been recovering and taking care of business since then. During that time…it was too dangerous to contact you.”

Isagi blinked.

“Hospitalized?!” Isagi exclaimed, the guilt seeping into him. “Are you okay?! What happened?! How bad is it?! Shouldn’t you be resting?”

“I’m mostly recovered, just a bit of pain still but it’s not that big of a deal. I’ve had worse.” Rin answered with a shrug. “Just a normal day.”

Isagi hated how easily he dismissed it. ‘Just a normal day’ made it even worse because that meant Rin was used to pain. He was used to getting injured – getting hospitalized. And even after that, he was still dealing with ‘business’.

“Did people hurt you?” Isagi asked quietly. He bit the inside of his cheek, knowing he shouldn’t have asked that, revealing that he had suspected something.

“You’re not as naive as I thought you were.” Rin stated, not answering the question. However, how he said it really pissed Isagi off.

“Excuse you.” Isagi automatically snapped back. “I’m not the one who looked up if consuming semen would be harmless.”

“Y-You—” Rin suddenly became flustered. He finally stopped driving, putting the car in park, then turning to Isagi. “That’s not common knowledge!”

“And neither is what you went through.” Isagi said with a frown. “You didn’t deny it. You got injured because of someone, didn’t you? Rin…you live a dangerous life, don’t you?”

Rin exhaled. He closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose. Isagi just kept staring at him, hoping that his eyes would somehow coax him into answering.

“I do so I had to stop talking to you for a bit until it was resolved or else you would be in danger.” Rin finally said reluctantly. “I couldn’t risk it. I had to switch my phone out so I wouldn’t fall into temptation to call you.”

Isagi recoiled slightly, now understanding the silence. It made more sense that if Rin was threatened, with his growing affection for Isagi, he would be a target as well. “But we’ve been out in public together before.”

“In areas that are…safe.” Rin was vague once more. “And it’s amazing how much a new wardrobe was able to disguise me though I didn’t mean to. It’s thanks to you for that.”

Isagi blinked a few times before realizing what he meant. He gave a small smile, glad that his desire to have Rin looking hot helped him in a small way.

“Anyways.” Rin coughed as if to hide his embarrassment. “I’m not going to stop seeing you. That was just something out of my control and it’s been resolved.”

Isagi was glad to hear that Rin had no intentions of breaking up. His affection for him was still so strong and Isagi felt like it was enough for him to keep going; to keep waiting for Rin. There were still many things they had to discuss and go through but he wanted to keep going.

“You asked me months ago what made me happy and I didn’t have an answer for that.” Rin suddenly said as he reached out for Isagi’s hand. His expression was serious. “I do now.”

Rin was never a man of many words. He liked using actions to convey what he meant even though when it came to initiating how much he liked Isagi, there was a bit of hesitation.

There was no hesitation this time.

He leaned forward, kissing Isagi on the lips. Isagi was surprised but it was a pleasant surprise. He closed his eyes, letting Rin take the lead, melting at how he slipped his tongue in Isagi’s mouth, not waiting for him to reciprocate.

He felt Rin’s hand on the back of his head, bringing him closer to roam deeper into his mouth. Isagi wasn’t sure they could but the closeness made it tense, their body heat radiating off each other, and Isagi wanted to take off his clothes.

He didn’t need to as he felt Rin grabbing the hem of his shirt, pulling it up. Isagi allowed him, breaking their kiss so Rin could fully take it off. Isagi returned the favour, unbuttoning Rin’s shirt, placing his hands on his chest to touch his skin. He roamed his palms all over, landing on an unfamiliar groove that he didn’t recall was there before. He saw Rin flinch.

“Is this…?” Isagi didn’t need to hear Rin’s answer. He looked down at the fresh scar on his side, wondering what had caused it. Who caused it and wondered if there was a way for Isagi to kill them for it? Rin said it was resolved so hopefully it meant that that person was dealt with.

…perhaps dating a yakuza brought out the worst in Isagi after all.

Rin didn’t respond, instead moving to kiss his jaw then his neck. Isagi’s eyes rolled back in pleasure as he felt Rin’s lips move down there. He gasped when he felt him sucking on the skin between his shoulder and neck, groaning when he felt Rin’s tongue swipe over that spot.

“Rin…” Isagi moaned when Rin’s hands moved to his chest, flicking at his nipple, his body shaking at his touch. The motion of being sucked on with Rin’s rough, calloused hands all over his body created such a sensational feeling, it was getting harder to hold it in. “I…I…”

I want you.

“I don’t have any lube again!” Isagi yelled in disbelief. He was absolutely ready for Rin to destroy his ass and with Rin taking the lead this time, he thought he was ready. But he was never ready.

Rin stopped sucking him, nuzzling his nose against his skin. He then looked over to the glove compartment and popped it open, taking out an unopened bottle of lube and extra large condoms.

“How…?” Isagi trailed off, not expecting Rin to have them.

“Just in case.” Rin mumbled into his shoulder. He rubbed his face against it. “I want it too.”

Isagi swallowed.

Rin moved his seat back to give them as much room as he could and grabbed Isagi’s waist, bringing him over the gear shift and onto his lap. Isagi tried to remove his pants in the awkward position, hitting his head on the ceiling of the car in the process and turning on the upper light by accident, making him yelp in surprise. He quickly turned it off and looked around, suddenly conscious of where they were. However, Rin had parked them in a secluded part on the hill, looking over the city lights.

Wouldn’t it be better if they went to a hotel or somewhere more private? Now, there was nobody there but who knew what could happen in a few minutes? It was dark now but what if someone saw them? They shouldn’t though because the windows were tinted but were they tinted enough?

Rin kissed his chest, hands going to his pants and tugging them down, helping him remove them, completely unbothered. His kisses were so soft and loving that Isagi felt his mind going hazy from each touch, forgetting about his worries. Isagi promptly threw his pants onto the passenger seat that he abandoned, embracing Rin as he continued to kiss him.

He grinded his hips, feeling a bulge from underneath him. The tight space didn’t give them much to move so Rin unzipped his pants and put the hem under his balls, letting his erection go free instead of taking off all of it. It was good enough for what they wanted to do though Isagi was a bit regretful he wouldn’t be able to admire his thighs as much.

Rin grabbed the bottle of lube and popped it open, pausing for a moment as he stared at it, then proceeded to put some on his fingers. Despite him being so bold earlier, he looked up at Isagi with eyes asking for permission, uncertain to take the next step. Isagi just gave him a smile and kissed him on the forehead.

“Go ahead.” Isagi whispered. He propped his ass up so he wasn’t fully sitting on Rin’s lap, making it easier to access. He felt Rin move against him and gasped when he felt the cold lube against his asshole. Rin stopped. “Keep going.”

There was hesitation for a moment but it didn’t last long. Rin started off with one finger, rubbing his asshole carefully before pushing a finger in slowly. Isagi’s nails dug into his shoulder, breathing heavily against Rin’s ear as he felt the sensation. Even though he had been practicing, ordering a special custom dildo with Rin’s size in mind (though he was sure it was still smaller than the actual thing), having something organic inside him felt different, especially since it was actually Rin’s.

Rin slowly pushed in more, stopping every so often to give Isagi a moment to catch his breath. He shouldn’t be this overwhelmed by a single finger but he was. Maybe because he was pressed up against Rin’s hot body or his scent danced around him, mesmerizing him. Perhaps it was the internal stress of being caught if someone looked into the window hard enough to see past the tint. Either way, Isagi felt his fingers more than usual, the small bumps of his knuckle, and then the small bend of it, pressing in a spot that sent Isagi moaning.

“Y-Yes…there…” Isagi said though he felt like he was babbling with how lightheaded he felt. “More. Deeper.”

He felt a second finger press against his asshole then slipping in. There was a slight sting as he was stretched out that caused him to hiss and made Rin stop once more. Once he was able to calm down and get used to it, he kissed the crook between Rin’s neck and shoulder, a signal for him to keep going. Rin bent his fingers again, pressing that same spot with more force, and Isagi felt like he was melting.

Rin took more time with two fingers, pumping them in and out, Isagi feeling both fingers inside him pushing as if to expand him. Judging by Rin’s serious expression, he was thinking very hard about his next move, preparing Isagi as much as he could.

A third finger went in and the pain existed for a few seconds before it transformed into a small bit of pleasure. Isagi arched his back, trying to push his ass against Rin’s hand to put as much as he could in. His fingers were thick and having them all together like that was enough for Isagi to reel at how good it felt. Clumsily, he reached for Rin’s cheek, planting a kiss on his lips, which he reciprocated. It was hard to focus though as Rin’s fingers kept going in and out, pressing on spots he didn’t know he could derive pleasure from, and moving and twisting. Considering this was Rin’s first time, even at fingering, Isagi was just complete putty in his hands.

“So good.” Isagi gasped against Rin’s mouth, unable to keep kissing him because he had to keep breathing. His gasps were getting louder with each motion, eyes looking at Rin. He knew he had to be a mess now, Rin’s eyes glazing over and staring at him as he lost his mind.

He felt something wet suddenly, looking down to see that Rin had already cummed, the semen on their chests. However, his erection didn’t weaken, still standing strong but precum was already coming out once more.

“Yoichi.” Rin whispered, making Isagi shiver. He grabbed his waist, pulling him closer, forcing his fingers inside of him to move in a different way. He kissed in on the lips softly, then on the jaw, butterfly kisses trailing all over his face and Isagi just felt so loved that he came right at that moment.

He loved Rin so much.

“I love you.” Isagi said, voice delirious but happy. At one point, tears had streamed down his cheeks, his body feeling everything. His skin, his lips, his tongue, his eyes – Isagi could feel every part of him even if they weren’t touching him directly.

Rin’s fingers were removed from inside Isagi. Isagi stuttered, voice barely coming out, the change of feeling almost making him cum again. He pouted when Rin stopped, wanting him to keep working him inside but saw him reach for the box of condoms. He widened his eyes and watched as Rin opened it, his heart beating in excitement to the point that he was shaking.

Rin stopped suddenly, the box still not fully open. Isagi nearly yelled at him to hurry up but saw that his face was red.

“You…” Rin began, frustration on his face. “You’re pressing too much…”

Isagi stopped and blinked. He looked down and saw that he was basically flushed against him, their dicks pressed together. The motion of him shaking and bouncing must have caused some friction because Isagi swore that it wasn’t that hard or big before.

He tried not to laugh.

“What? You don’t like that?” Isagi asked with a small smirk. He leaned forward purposefully, propping his arms on Rin’s shoulder, letting it hang loosely on the back of his seat. He bounced up again, the friction between them hot and slippery. Rin closed his eyes and groaned, causing Isagi to do it again, wanting to hear his voice more. Rin, even in that moment, was quiet but Isagi kept going, bringing one of his hands to his chest to run up and down just so he could make him louder.

“Yoichi, s-stop.” Rin moaned. His body was trembling underneath and then Isagi heard a sudden sound that made him jump, causing Rin to moan again.

He turned his head and saw that Rin had dropped the box of condoms on the ground. Isagi, in a better position than Rin, reached down to grab them only for his head to hit the steering wheel.

BEEEEEEEEP

“Fuck!” Isagi yelled, holding his forehead where he hit it and also for causing the sound. He grabbed the box and, with Rin’s assistance, sat back in his lap. Rin reached out for his forehead.

He rubbed it for Isagi and he allowed him, enjoying his touch even if it was at the expense of himself. Isagi leaned into it and closed his eyes, the pain no longer bothering him and he was just enjoying it now. Slowly, Rin’s hand went down to his cheek and then under Isagi’s chin, rubbing underneath.

Isagi opened his eyes and glared.

“Are you treating me like a dog?” Isagi asked, a little miffed. He slapped Rin’s hand away when the other man snorted. “I’m not a dog!”

“You could’ve fooled me with how much you were panting.” Rin replied with the tiniest smirk that Isagi almost thought he didn’t have it.

Isagi’s eyebrow twitched. He punched Rin on the chest but clearly, it was ineffective based on the amusement in his eyes.

“You jerk.” Isagi snapped, grabbing his cheeks and tugging them. His serious face looked comical like that, Isagi briefly forgetting his annoyance. He released his cheeks, placing his hands on his shoulders instead, leaning forward so he was only centimetres from Rin’s ear. “If that’s the case, I’ll bite you like the dog I am.”

Isagi’s tongue went to Rin’s ear, licking it slowly before using his teeth to tug at it. He could feel Rin getting hard between them again. He kept sucking and biting on his ear, avoiding his earlobe that had his stud in it. He made his way down his neck, biting and sucking and doing the same when it got to his shoulder.

He smirked into Rin’s shoulder when he heard the sound of wrapping being ripped open. Kissing the last place he bit, Isagi backed up to see Rin holding a condom in his hand.

Isagi exhaled, his stomach tingling with excitement and nerves.

He could see that Rin was also feeling the same. Even though he kept a cool expression, his hands were shaking slightly as he put the condom on himself. Isagi felt his asshole twitch, watching as it rolled all the way down, fitting him perfectly.

Extra large indeed.

Isagi grabbed the bottle of lube and placed some on his fingers, inserting them inside himself, suddenly not confident that he could take all of Rin. Maybe more preparation was needed but he was getting so impatient. Looking at Rin’s hard penis made him shudder. Chills spread through his body as he imagined how deep inside Rin would reach.

Isagi got up on his knees, careful not to hit his head on the ceiling again. He grabbed Rin’s dick, trying to position it under him so he could aim to get it in. Rin held onto his hips tightly even though his hands were still shaking. Rin leaned forward, kissing him on his chest and stomach as he tried to find the right angle.

“Eek!” Isagi squealed when Rin’s teeth caught his nipple. He covered his mouth, aghast at the sound that he made, only for a muffled moan to come out when Rin started sucking and licking the nipple he had bitten.

His own dick was trembling, wanting to be relieved as just being pressed against Rin’s body was not enough at this point. But Isagi had to continue – they were so close and both of them were ready.

He lowered himself, craning his neck awkwardly to try to find the dick but felt it against the bottom of his right butt cheek instead. Lifting himself again, struggling to reach the base of Rin’s dick, he lowered himself and felt the tip against his asshole but—

It wouldn’t go in.

Even after all that practicing, stretching and lubing, it wouldn’t slip in so easily. Isagi felt mortified, now facing the reality of this weapon of mass destruction, wondering if it was even possible.

“Rin.” Isagi turned to him, making him stop sucking on his chest. “C-Can you position yourself? I’m going to stretch myself a bit more. You’re just so big…”

Isagi could see how dark Rin’s face got after that. He slowly nodded and they both looked down, watching as Rin attempted to position himself.

“Like this?” Rin muttered, a hint of embarrassment in his voice.

“Yeah, probably.” Isagi replied. It was awkward as he had to use his hands on his butt cheeks, parting them as much as he could so his hole could open up as much as possible. He couldn’t really hold onto anything and keep his balance in this position so all he could do was rest his elbow on the window to not fall over. “Hold still.”

Isagi tried again, lowering himself slowly. Rin kept himself as still as possible and Isagi could feel the tip once more. Just for extra measure, he pulled his cheeks a little more and felt the tip actually enter this time though with a bit of struggle. He could sense Rin twitching, still holding onto his dick for Isagi to sink into.

He huffed when he managed to get a couple of centimetres in, the burning sensation of his stretched asshole more than when Rin used his fingers. It’s not like Isagi was a novice at this though it had been a long time since he had had sex. Not even the custom dildo could’ve prepared him for this.

Slowly, Isagi lowered himself, pushing to try to take in more than the last time. He had to stop a few times because of how uncomfortable it was so the process was long. His legs were shaking, tired from keeping himself up that long and in such an awkward position. He suddenly wished that Rin’s dick wasn’t so long and girthy so they could finally get to it.

He gasped as more slipped in, feeling Rin raise his hips so he could help. Isagi stopped abruptly, placing his hands on the car seat, trying to steady himself. His insides felt the hot member, his ass puckering trying to absorb more inside, and his own dick was throbbing, precum all over it now. It wasn’t even fully in but he was starting to get used to the pain, numbing himself a little.

Rin’s hands were on his hips to support him. They lowered him again, Isagi squeaking whenever it hit a part inside of him he wasn’t ready for. They stopped when that happened and Isagi could see Rin’s mix of worry and lust on his face.

“You’re doing well, you’re doing well.” Isagi said to him reassuringly. He leaned forward, giving him a small kiss. “Just give me a moment. I need – nngh – to breathe.”

“Take your time.” Rin replied though the concern was still there. “I’ll wait for you.”

I’ll wait for you.

Just like how Isagi had been waiting for Rin, it was his turn to wait for Isagi.

How the tables had turned.

Isagi exhaled and sank down. Perhaps because he was used to it now, he kept going until he reached a certain point, nearly screaming when it hit a spot inside him. He stopped, eyes glazing over, wondering what was that. Even in his past relationships, it didn’t feel like anybody had hit that spot in him before.

His breath was shaky as he raised himself and then slipped back down.

“A-Ah…”

Again, he hit it. The nerves went through his body, the urge to be touched stronger than before. There was still a bit more of Rin left that wasn’t in him and Isagi wondered if this was the limit. If he could feel this good from just this much of Rin, it would be good enough, right? Rin was just too fucking big and Isagi was already struggling.

But he was never one to back down from a challenge.

Raising himself up, Isagi swallowed. He stared at Rin, their eyes locking together. Rin looked like a complete mess, some drool coming out of his mouth as he looked like he was about to consume him. Isagi wondered what state he was in if Rin was like that.

He wanted Rin to mess him up more.

He sat down abruptly, taking as much in as possible, hitting that same spot again with more force. Isagi howled and screamed, unable to control his voice, feeling everything inside him. For a moment, he thought he went completely blind, eyes wide open but unable to see anything. Slowly, his vision started to return, black spots and blurry lights appearing as the pleasure hit him.

He sat there for a moment, unsure if he should even move but it didn’t matter as Rin took things into his own hands.

Rin moved his hips slowly at first, making Isagi bounce on him, hitting that spot again and again, his moans uncontrollable. Rin’s hands went from his hips up his chest, flicking and pinching his nipples, and Isagi came just from that, feeling that they were much more sensitive than before. He wasn’t sure if Rin had cummed yet because of the condom and he didn’t care. If Rin came so much that it gushed out of the condom, Isagi would devour it just like when he swallowed.

The pace got quicker. Isagi was bouncing against him constantly, thighs and legs tired but still going. Isagi arched his back and felt Rin’s hand on it to support him. He leaned forward to bite Isagi’s neck but instead of pain, all Isagi felt was pleasure.

“Rin, Rin, Rin, Rin…” All he could say was his name over and over again. It was like a chant to make his body be even more consumed by him than it already was. 

Isagi felt his focus fading, his mind and body only filled with Rin. Every touch, every breath, every kiss, every bite – every single thing that Rin did, Isagi’s body reacted, egging him on to go faster and to touch him more. Isagi was getting exhausted but he didn’t want to stop, cumming once more when Rin suddenly changed his positioning, lowering himself on the seat so Isagi could flop over on the now lowered car seat.

Isagi was hanging off the head of the car seat now, giving Rin easier access to his chest. He felt more bites and more kisses; his nipples being sucked and flicked and Isagi knew he would have bruises there later. He didn’t care though, the idea of having Rin mark him everywhere making him hard again and if he wasn’t so tired, Isagi would be doing the same thing.

He pushed himself up on the seat, looking down at Rin as their hips moved. Rin’s face was flushed, his skin sweaty and eyes were so calm, looking at Isagi softly. A hand on Isagi’s hip reached for his face and Isagi nuzzled his cheek in it.

He came once more, some of it getting on Rin’s chin. Their hips slowed, perhaps of exhaustion, but Isagi could feel something sticky coming from his ass as Rin pulled out. Isagi looked and saw that some cum was leaking out from the bottom despite it being secured on. The condom looked completely full and Isagi flushed at the amount. He wondered how many times Rin cummed.

The condom was discarded, Rin searching in the glove compartment for a plastic bag to throw it in. Isagi had tried to go back into the passenger seat but Rin held him in his lap, unwilling to let him go. It was for the better because Isagi could hardly move, his legs were turned into jelly, and he felt like he could fall asleep at any moment.

Rin took out more things from the glove compartment, Isagi not minding the movement as he closed his eyes. His eyes fluttered open when he felt something cool against his skin, watching Rin use a wet wipe on him to clean his sweat and the excess semen. Rin was incredibly attentive, working on his face, down his neck and torso then his legs and his ass. Isagi hissed when Rin cleaned his asshole, the soreness setting in.

There was a bit more movement and Rin moved his arms like some kind of doll, putting a large shirt on him then settling him against his chest. Isagi, in his dazed state, realized belatedly that this shirt was too big on him and looked down.

It was Rin’s.

Isagi exhaled in satisfaction, staying in Rin’s arms like that. His head was on his chest, and he could hear his heartbeat, taking note of how it was once quick and then finally slowed down at a regular pace. He knew that tomorrow, he would be absolutely useless and made a note to message Karasu saying you couldn’t come in.

There was too much to do but for now, Isagi could forget the rest of the world.

He felt himself drifting off to the scent of Rin on him, his arms wrapped around him, and his steady breathing and heart lulling him to sleep.

“I love you.”

It was barely a whisper, but Isagi managed to catch it. He smiled as he felt Rin kiss him on the back of the neck, knowing that Rin would appear in his dreams as well.

Isagi was back to work not long after, only skipping one shift because he had to make money. He was still sore from that night but he was in high spirits, smiling and shining more than before.

“Ohoho.” Bachira came up to him with a sly grin, glancing up at his half-naked body. “Someone got laid.”

“And?!” Isagi replied sharply, trying to cover up the bruises and bites Rin left on him.

“I was wondering why you were absent the other day, but I guess that explains it.” Bachira chortled, poking at the nail marks on Isagi’s waist. “You have to tell me all the details later~”

“I’ll think about it.” Isagi dismissed as he put his shirt on. “I…I don’t think I’m ready to tell you everything yet.”

“Hmm? How strange.” Bachira hummed as he finished up changing. He closed and locked his locker. “You’re usually willing to divulge the details.”

“It’s just…” Isagi trailed off. It wasn’t something they could be completely public about and he knew that Bachira would be worried if he revealed he was dating Rin. “I don’t want to share any information about him with anyone. He’s mine.”

“Ooh, possessive. I never thought you were.” Bachira laughed. He patted Isagi on the back, making him flinch. “Well, keep him to yourself then. At least let me meet him when you’re ready. I need to know the guy that you’re so protective of.”

“Hahaha.” Isagi laughed awkwardly.

They had their meeting and then headed to their positions, getting into the motion of their regular routine. When Emerald opened, people slowly filtered in, placing bets, having drinks, and smoking cigarettes and cigars.

Hours later in Isagi’s shift, the door to the casino opened and the atmosphere changed. Walking in with his back straight and eyes forward, Rin headed to his usual spot at the poker table, barely acknowledging anyone as he passed by.

“Welcome, boss.” Isagi greeted with a smile, slightly softer than usual. “How much are you betting today?”

Rin didn’t say anything at first, staring at Isagi, contemplating his choices. He then took out a pile of chips and placed them on the table.

“A thousand and we’ll see from there.” 

“Yes, sir.”

The bets were placed and the cards were dealt. Everyone looked at their hand, some of them looking confident but others were stone faced. It was difficult for anyone to gauge Rin’s expression, each one using their ever raising bets to provoke something out of him.

“And how about you, boss?” Isagi asked after the others had decided whether to raise their bets or fold. 

“All in.” Rin replied with an air of confidence that made the others at the table shake. Even behind his mask, he flashed Isagi a look that only he could understand. “I’m going all in.”

Isagi’s lips twitched and he nodded in understanding.

“Yes, sir.”

Rin easily won the game. No cheating was necessary. He played like he was supposed to and did what he wanted, the arrogance oozing out of him as he kept winning. He knew that Rin was watching him carefully, gaze lingering on him longer than usual. It was difficult for Isagi as he wanted to just drag him by that tie and kiss him right then but he refrained from doing so, reminding himself that he could do that later without any restraint. He would go all in when it came to Rin.

He was willing to put a bet on it.