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“Ugh, this sucks. I barely got any sleep during that last lecture.”
“Vodka, shouldn't you be paying attention in class, not sleeping?”
“Eh, it’s fine, all that I really need to pay attention to is the track so I can show Scarlet who’s the greatest!”
Vodka and Special Week were on their way to the club room of Team Spica, with Tokai Teio and Mejiro McQueen tailing behind. Afternoon training was to start soon, and with Daiwa Scarlet, Vodka’s eternal rival, nowhere in sight for the day, Vodka was not going to miss getting in extra practice over her.
“It is odd that Scarlet hasn’t shown up to classes today. She is not one to take her studies lightly,” remarked McQueen.
“You got any idea where she could have gone, Vodka?” asked Teio. “I didn’t see anything about her not coming today in the group chat.”
“I don’t know, she wasn’t in her bed when I woke up,” Vodka thought a little bit more and tried to recollect her thoughts of the night before.
“How many times are you gonna sneeze before your brain comes out of your nose? Some of us would like to sleep,” Vodka glared at Daiwa Scarlet as she watched her wipe her nose with a tissue.
Scarlet matched her glare with an even fiercer one before turning back to her book.
“Maybe if you stopped trying to listen to my every movement, you would be snoring away.”
“Oh please, you think I want to listen to you 24/7?” shot back Vodka.
“It would explain why you feel the need to comment on anything I do or say. I wouldn’t put it past you to hear my singing so you can criticize it,” snarled Daiwa Scarlet.
“Yeah right, like I care about shit like that. You can’t sing for shit anyway. My life would be better without having to hear your voice everyday!” Vodka exclaimed, with the smuggest grin she could muster on her face. The last thing she remembers after that was a book to her face and a sneeze.
“Hmm, you know what, she didn’t seem that great last night, maybe she went to the nurse’s. Eh, tough luck for her,” Vodka didn’t really care if Scarlet did go, or if she was sick. And she totally did not feel bad for ignoring the possible signs that her roommate may have not been feeling well.
“She did seem a bit sluggish yesterday as we trained together,” remarked McQueen.
The Special Week and Teio also seemed concerned for Scarlet, but the group reached the club room before they could voice their own thoughts. Faintly, they could hear sounds coming from inside. It sounded like… crying?
Opening the door, the four Umamusumes were met with a sight that left them stunned. The club room was as it always was, except for two things. One was Gold Ship, whose face was buried into the table as she wailed. And in front of her, was a plush doll of Daiwa Scarlet.
“SCARLEEEEEETTTTT! IT SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN YOUUUUUUUUU!!!!”
“Uhhh, Goldshi, you alright?” Vodka asked as she stared at the weird combo of the plushie and a crying Gold Ship. As she approached her teammate, she also noticed a water bottle next to the plush.
Suddenly, Gold Ship shot up, and her expression went from hysteric to serious. “Oh, hey everyone. We may need to find a new member for Team Spica.”
“Uh, Goldshi, what do you mean?” asked Special Week, as she was answered by Gold Ship pointing to the Scarlet plushie.
“Unfortunately, due to a mishap of mine, our dear teammate Daiwa Scarlet no longer runs with us in a world ruled by flesh, but by felt.” Yeah, Vodka was not following at all, and it seemed like the other members of Spica were no different.
“Goldshi, can you explain that in, uh, not Goldshi language?” Teio asked.
“You see, I had to come up with the epicest of pranks yesterday. I had passed by the lab of Agnes Tachyon, it struck me that her brilliant mind must have come up with some kind of doohickey for me to use. So I took a neon green vial she had hanging up while she was gone.”
Vodka was kind of impressed. Even she wouldn’t try to steal from Tracen’s resident mad scientist, no telling what would happen to her. It’s a wonder how Scarlet gets along with Tachyon.
“So you think whatever Tachyon had cooking up in her lab did something to Scarlet?” Vodka asked, not really buying what Gold Ship was selling.
“Oh no, the vial wasn’t all. It was most likely magic.” What?
Everyone else in the room just stared at Gold Ship, as she stared back, clearly believing she said the most normal thing ever.
“This is ridiculous,” mumbled McQueen as Teio tried to get Gold Ship to explain what she meant.
“Well, recently I have been learning how to cast spells from Sweep Tosho. After helping her with some training, she agreed to teach me some cool spells to use for pranks. After gathering the vial, I had the brilliant thought of combining the great minds of both Agnes Tachyon and Sweep Tosho. With the use of science and magic, I could bring forth the ultimate prank!” Gold Ship looked a bit too proud for someone who was bawling their eyes out a few minutes ago.
“So, what was the prank supposed to do?” Vodka’s question was answered with “I have no idea.” Of course.
“Um, Goldshi, how do you know your prank has anything to do with Scarlet?” Special Week looked a bit concerned as she asked, but whether that was because she believed Gold Ship or was questioning any faith she had left in her, Vodka couldn’t tell.
“It is quite simple, as this proves it!” Gold Ship held up the Scarlet plushie as if it was the Holy Grail. “Our dear Scarlet has been turned into a mere doll.”
“You cannot honestly expect us to believe this,” said McQueen, as she glared at Gold Ship.
“Unfortunately, I only speak the truth, and you are just another piece of evidence, McQueen. You see, yesterday, when you and Scarlet had begun to train, I noticed you both left your water bottles at the table unattended for a bit. So, I took my chances and guessed which was yours, dropping the liquid into the water and casting the spell. I quickly left afterwards, and since you are still here, that means Scarlet was the victim.”
“You planned to make me drink some unknown liquid!?” shouted McQueen as she stomped on Gold Ship’s foot. Vodka felt like she kinda had that coming, and started to turn her attention back to the rest of the room.
Hmmm? Vodka noticed something pink sticking out of one of the open lockers. Hey, isn’t this…
Picking it out of the locker, Vodka’s suspicions were correct. It was Scarlet’s phone.
But, why would it be here? She never lets this thing out of sight. She didn’t talk to me for a whole week after I hid it once.
Looking into the locker further, she also found Scarlet’s purse. No way, you can’t be telling me that…
Vodka turned to the rest of the room. “I think Gold Ship is right.”
Around the table sat the five members of Spica, each staring at their teammate, who through science and magic was now a plushie. Next to the plushie was Scarlet’s phone and purse. The room was silent as each Umamusume mulled over what had happened.
“We cannot seriously believe this is actually Scarlet?” exclaimed McQueen, not letting her rational side be taken over by even the tiniest doubt that Gold Ship had somehow cast real magic.
“But McQueen, the evidence points to this being real,” countered Teio.
“McQueen, Vodka, didn’t you both say she didn’t seem well yesterday either?” Special Week asked, as both Vodka and McQueen nodded. The coincidences kept piling up.
I hate to admit it, but I think this is actually her. Vodka picked up the plushie and stared at it.
“Pffffff,” Vodka’s stoic face started to break into a grin, and then into a cacophony of laughter. “HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH YOU REALLY GOT PRANKED BY GOLDSHI DIDN'T YUH SCARLET!”
The rest of Team Spica looked at Vodka as she almost fell over from laughter.
“Guess I don’t need to hear your annoying sniffling or sneezing anymore, huh Scarlet?” said Vodka to the plushie. The plushie did not respond back.
“Looks like I am the better Umamusume. No way you could ever outrun me now!” The plushie did not respond back.
“Haha, yeah, looks like you.. can’t catch up to me anymore.” The plushie did not respond back.
“Hahaha…ha ha, Scarlet?” Vodka didn’t like this silence. Scarlet was supposed to fire back, shout how she would never let herself be beaten by someone like her. Scarlet was supposed to roil her up, not sit there in silence.
“Goldshi, we can turn her back right?” Vodka asked, no, pleaded with Gold Ship. But it was no use.
“I’m sorry Vodka, but the counter-spell Tosho taught me didn’t work.”
Vodka could barely feel the tears roll down her cheeks as she realized that Daiwa Scarlet was gone. Her rival, her goal, her striving purpose, ripped away from her before she ever even got the chance to prove herself. Maybe this was the universe granting Vodka’s wish, as she would never be able to hear Daiwa Scarlet’s voice again.
Special Week comforted Vodka as she cried, with the rest of the table dealing with their own feelings of morose over their teammate. The morning continued until Gold Ship suddenly slammed her hands down. “THAT’S IT!”
“Tosho told me that there was one remedy that one could count on if a spell cannot be reversed normally. The only thing that may be able to save Scarlet is… TRUE LOVE’S KISS!”
The other four stared at Gold Ship. Then, Gold Ship, Special Week, Tokai Teio, and Mejiro McQueen all turned their heads towards Vodka.
“Uhhhh, why are you all looking at me?” Vodka did not like where this was going.
“Well, I mean, it has to be you right, Vodka?” asked Teio, as Gold Ship nodded.
“HUH, WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT!?!?!” sputtered Vodka, her face quickly lighting up with red.
Special Week was next to answer. “Well, I thought you and Scarlet were like Suzuka and I? Are you not?” she asked innocently.
Vodka started choking on air, face as red as Loves Only You’s hair. “NO NO NO WE ARE TOTALLY NOT LIKE THAT!” Seriously, why would anyone think her and Scarlet were dating? They hated each other, right?
“Even so, I agree that if anyone were to have the best chance at saving Scarlet, it is you, Vodka,” stated McQueen.
They were crazy, they were all crazy. No way Vodka was in l-l-lov… She could barely even finish the thought before feeling another rush of blood to her face.
But, a tiny voice in her head told Vodka, are they really wrong? Why else would I care so much about what Scarlet says? And doesn’t the thought of her not being here scare me?
Fuck it, I have to save Scarlet. Even if I have to… kiss her. Vodka hyped herself up mentally before grabbing the plushie. For a few seconds, all she could do was stare at the doll’s lips. I can do this, I can do this. She won’t remember this, right? No way, right? It will be real quick, just a peck, just a peck.
Vodka slowly brought the doll closer to her face, as the rest of the room watched the spectacle, not hearing the doorknob begin to turn. Two lips finally met, as Vodka put tender care into her kiss. Silence permeated the room as Vodka just hoped this worked.
“Hey, sorry I’m late, did you see my phooooooooooooooooooo-” Vodka’s eyes shot open, noticing in the corner of her vision auburn twintails. She felt her hands go cold and face grow hot as the plushie fell from her grasp.
Daiwa Scarlet just looked at the scene slack-jawed. For a few seconds, but what felt like an eternity to Vodka, Scarlet took a step forward and made her way to the table. Not speaking a word (but Tokai Teio noted later on that Scarlet’s face at the moment told a thousand), she picked up her phone, purse, and the doll and left the club room.
Slowly, the rest of Team Spica left, telling themselves today will be a free day and they’ll work twice as hard tomorrow to make it up. This just left Vodka, frozen in shock and embarrassment at being caught, and maybe a bit of delight at the fact that Scarlet was alright.
Eventually, Vodka had made it back to her and Scarlet’s room. It took her a few moments of standing in front of the door to actually open it, but Vodka knew she couldn’t get out of this. Opening the door, she sees Scarlet reading her book by her bed.
“Um, hey,” Vodka braced herself for the myriad of responses that might come. Laughter, mockery, or worst, disgust.
“Oh, um, hi,” said Scarlet, eyes averted and cheeks dusted with pink. “Sorry, for not letting you guys know I would be out for today. I wasn’t feeling that great, so I went to go see Tachyon and fell asleep in her lab. And then I noticed I forgot my stuff in the club room yesterday, and then, um, yeah…” Scarlet yammered on as the two were doing their best to not meet eyes at all.
“Yeah, um, sorry you, uh, had to see that. Gold Ship, um, she told us, um,” Vodka could barely find the words in the moment, but glancing at Scarlet again, she remembered how scared she felt that her rival was gone forever.
“Hey Scarlet, I want to apologize for last night.”
Scarlet’s eyes widened as she raised her head to look at her roommate.
“It was uncalled for to say that stuff about you. I was just trying to rile you up but didn’t realize how awful what I said was.” Vodka spilled her heart out as Scarlet just sat and listened. It felt… nice for Vodka to say these, almost like a weight was taken off her chest.
“Thank you, Vodka. And it's alright, I know you don’t mean half the things you say. Like how I know you love to hear my voice,” Scarlet giggled, and Vodka just muttered “I guess you do sound cute.”
“Hm, what was that?”
“Nothing, nothing,” Vodka quickly added before laughing. Scarlet joined her, and the two just enjoyed being in each other’s presence.
“Hey, Vodka?”
“HmmMMMPPH?” Suddenly, Vodka felt something soft on her lips. Scarlet pulled away, face flushed as she looked at Vodka and gave her a smirk.
“So, whose lips tasted better?”
“Hehehehehehehe, finally, it’s here!”
A few dorm rooms down, cries of joy were heard as Agnes Digital swung around her room, Daiwa Scarlet plushie in her arms. She was so glad Scarlet was able to get her one, and signed too! As Digital looked at the plushie, she felt as though the doll was blessed by the Three Goddesses themselves.
Digital let out a few more cries of happiness as she opened her closet, revealing multiple shrines dedicated to different pairings of Umamusumes. Digital placed the Scarlet plushie next to a signed plushie of Vodka, all within the shrine titled “VodSca Paradise!”
“Ahhhhh, this truly is the life. Now my OTP is together here too!” Agnes Digital would spend the next ten hours kneeling in front of the shrine, imagining all the scenarios she could think of involving the bickering roommates. Eventually, she would pass out, a symptom Agnes Tachyon, who had witnessed this aftermath many times, was told was an inevitability of “himejoshing out”.