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It had been years.
Years that Hux had been planning, searching, trying to find a break in the wall standing before him. The only thing standing between him and his rightful seat on the throne of the universe was a single entity. As a cadet Hux would have balked at the idea that such a thing could get in the way of his destined rule, the Force was nothing more than stories rebels told their children at night to make them feel safe as they had no other way to do so. It was ridiculous, but more infuriating than that, it was real, and it was halting the progress he had spent over a decade making.
That was, until Snoke finally made a fatal mistake. Without seeming to realize what he had done he had dropped into Hux’s lap the perfect weapon, the key to his undoing. It was months since Hux had left Ren at Snoke’s citadel to finish training with his master, and when he returned he did so in a state that made Hux want to sit at the edge of his seat, charged with excitement he hadn’t experienced since childhood. It was better than he could have ever hoped. Training had beaten the resilience out of him, and since he arrived via shuttle back on the Finalizer his usual daily displays of insubordination were nowhere to be found. Ren had been crafted into a pointed weapon with a fierce bite and an undying loyalty to his master, but no one with a soul as fierce and as angry as his could ever truly be tamed, and that was where the opportunity made itself known. There were cracks in Ren’s new, calmer facade, where Hux could see the old Ren peeking through. Hints of sarcasm when speaking, fists clenched tightly to his sides when facing irritations, and the few rare occasions where a maintenance droid would be required to his personal quarters. He had once said he was being torn apart, now Hux could see the fracture lines.
Kylo Ren was, for lack of better terminology, absolutely perfect.
The Force was the one thing Hux could never master, the one thing he could never account for in his tactical plans. He had the rest sorted out, he had the men under his command already loyal to him, he had an army and access to its resources, and he had the leadership capabilities to command them. Yet he could not counter a being that Hux was almost certain could snap his neck from a galaxy away.
However, if he had Kylo Ren under his thumb, that would turn the tides drastically. Hux didn’t care if Ren continued his meandering chase for Skywalker once the Order was truly his, he would gladly let his new hound hunt and kill them to keep any other Force users from threatening his rule. There would be no need to keep a short leash when Hux could clearly see the man Ren was desperately trying to keep aflame within the tight constraints Snoke had allotted him. Simply stoking the fire and releasing the hold would gain him a loyal knight of his own.
The process, luckily enough, was a practiced one. Hux hadn’t climbed to the rank of General in the First Order by thirty-four years of age without learning the subtle art of manipulating the people around him to his way of thinking. Ren would, perhaps a bit ironically, be his easiest subject to date with how vulnerable he clearly was. Add that to his abysmal lack of people skills and Hux would barely even have to try. The first step was a simple one, to let Kylo think he still held a position of command on the Finalizer. He had lead some missions in the years before Starkiller, and Hux was confident he could do so again, despite having not been off the ship since his arrival. Hux had purposefully not put Ren forward for a mission yet to prepare for that moment, to make when he did memorable, a noticeable turn in trust. Taking Ren’s suggestions and allowing him command would give him back the autonomy Snoke had so carelessly stripped from him.
The next step would be for Hux to confide something in the Knight. Something unimportant, nothing incredibly compromising, but still personal and meaningful. Something about his childhood perhaps, to make Ren feel like Hux trusted him, like he was important enough to him to break the professional barrier and get to know him as a man. There were a plethora of nostalgic sounding tidbits from his childhood that could be of use, and Hux would release them one at a time until he felt that Ren considered himself a confidant and would open himself up in return.
From there it was all a matter of maintaining those two elements, personal and professional trust, for as long as it took until Hux felt Ren was ready to hear the plans for his own rebellion. That final act was the one he was strong enough to admit he feared, bearing his neck to the animal he had tried to tame in the hopes that what he had established truly worked. It would be a test unlike he had ever faced, every ounce of his skill boiling down to two results.
Either to conquer, or to die.
A risk worth taking if Hux had ever seen one.
—-
The opportunity to begin his first step came during Alpha shift, a mere three days after Hux finally decided to set his plans for Ren in motion. They were in the middle of a briefing about an upcoming mission to a nearby hostile planet, one with tough terrain and a feral native species of large animal known to be highly territorial and incredibly strong. One of his stormtrooper captains, a woman a bit shorter than Phasma that went by the name Avix, was requesting more troops in order to secure the mission’s completion, which Hux knew was code for ‘be picked off until we’re done and have a few left’. He had almost missed it and simply allotted her the troops, tired of hearing her and Phasma argue back and forth, when he realized that now was an opportune moment to begin his work.
“Lord Ren,” he stated, cutting Avix off before she could let out another string of complaints about her squad size. Ren had been standing to the side, arms crossed as he leaned against the wall in his usual stance for meetings. Upon hearing Hux address him his helmet lifted and he straightened up, unused to being addressed when it came to briefings.
Hux turned to regard the faceless mask, locking his eyes through what he assumed to be the section Ren saw out of, hoping he managed to catch his eyes. “In the interest of not losing more troopers, as we’re a bit short as of late-“ he couldn’t help himself for the jibe at the loss of their numbers on Starkiller, but it was a slow build after all, “-I believe you can accompany a smaller number of troops and lead them through the mission with minimal casualties.”
Ren stood there for a moment, and Hux desperately wished he could see under the mask. Manipulation was hard when you couldn’t rely on the feedback of the other person and adjust, but a challenge had never scared him before and it wouldn’t start now. Giving Ren a little bit of space, letting him command a mission again, there weren’t a high number of ways it could go wrong unless Snoke had broken him more than Hux anticipated. After a beat Ren moved and Hux tried not to make a show of the way his eyes darted over his torso and arms, reading his body language in the absence of a face. Ren straightened, echoing the prideful way he used to storm around the Finalizer, and it took everything Hux had not to grin. Mask or no mask, Ren could be read like an open book. It was a relief as much as a delight.
The modulated voice that came from the mask was just as unemotive as ever. “I can. When do we depart?”
Hux turned his attention to Avix, settling her with a gaze that very clearly read ‘the matter has been settled’ in case she got any ideas about trying to press her trooper numbers and mucking up how perfectly everything had gone until that moment. If it unsettled her, the mask and her body language gave away nothing, she simply nodded and provided them with an answer. “My troops will be ready to mobilize in twenty-four hours, sir.”
Hux had to keep from smiling, almost feeling the energy now radiating off Ren. He wasn’t Force-sensitive, but Ren once told him emotions can project, and if that was the case he could tell the knight was charged and ready to attack, let off his leash for the first time in months. “Good. We have a plan then. We will convene again for the debriefing when Ren, Avix and the troopers return. You’re all dismissed.”
Hux waved his hand and everyone began to file out and back to their positions. Everyone, that was, but Ren. Out of the corner of his eye Hux noticed the looming black form hadn’t left the room, only migrated towards the exit, stopping within a few feet of where Hux was standing. He looked up and lowered his data pad, cocking an eyebrow. “Ren, I trust you’re feeling up to the task? I recommended you because I figured you no less capable than when you lead previous missions of the same kind. If my estimations were off, you need to let me know.”
He tried to make his statement sound as formal and unremarkable as possible. Making it seem as if the decision was hard would show Ren that Hux had doubts in his abilities, and what Ren needed from him was confidence. He needed to know his leadership skills were never even questioned. If Hux made an ordeal of it, it wouldn’t be as reassuring, nor meaningful. Kylo’s posture stayed straight but the tension left his shoulders, his fists unclenched slightly, and Hux knew that he’d won.
“I am perfectly capable General, you will get your information with minimal loss.”
Something about it, the posture, the way he spoke, showed more of the Ren from before Starkiller fell than Hux had seen since he returned. His statement was laced with the old competitive edge they once held, a rivalry based on who could return the most efficient results, but the usual spiteful tone was lessened. Ren turned on his heel and walked out of the room, robes flowing behind him in the dramatic fashion that always forced Hux to subdue his eyes from rolling. When he was gone, Hux afforded himself a small smile as he began to look over his information for the day again, looking to his task with renewed confidence.
He could do this.
—-
The next opportunity didn’t come for three more weeks. It was important for Hux to wait for the right moment to escalate to his next step, the situation having to arise naturally, lest Ren sense that something was amiss. Weeks prior Ren had returned from his mission with the promised minimal stormtrooper loss, and Hux found himself more pleased than he had anticipated. He figured that perhaps he had held a little more doubt of Ren’s abilities than he let on, but after being assured by a success he assigned him to another mission two weeks later, a shorter one of less consequence with Phasma. Ren and Phasma had always done well together, an equal level of ruthless that both tended to appreciate at each other’s side. Hux knew working with her again would continue to stoke the fire of Ren’s old self coming back to life.
Hux was heading to the command room for a briefing on the next ground mission he intended to send Ren on when he heard it; two modulated metallic voices, raised and angry. He immediately picked up his speed and rounded the corner, entering the room just in time to stop what appeared to be an argument seconds away from cresting into a full-blown brawl between Ren and Captain Avix.
“What is going on here?” he barked, and two masks simultaneously turned to him and began yelling at once.
“If he doesn’t like the way I run my missions he can take it up with-“
“I know the Resistance tactics, this formation is going to get an entire squadron killed-“
“Since when have you given a single damn about my troopers when you run around scaring them half to death with that flaming toy you call a weapon-
“You would be smart to watch your tongue Captain lest you find yourself closer to my saber than you intend-”
“Enough!” Hux boomed, echoing through the room, and he counted himself lucky that both of them blessedly stopped talking. From what little could be interpreted from their bickering explanation, Hux quickly determined that Avix must have proposed a tactic that the Resistance could easily counter, to which Ren objected, apparently out of concern for their trooper numbers. Avix was unlikely to believe it for two reasons, the first being that she was right that Ren had never given thought to trooper casualties previously. Hux experienced a brief flash of delight when he realized that Ren’s sudden concern for the troopers likely came from their sustained numbers being his reason to once again lead missions, or perhaps even better, his want to please Hux to continue to do so. The second reason was that, like everyone in the Order aside from himself and Snoke, she was unaware of his childhood in the very heart of the Resistance, and was therefore unaware that his intel was likely correct. Hux, knowing this, turned slightly to face Kylo more fully, squaring his gaze once again on the eyepiece of the mask. “You, start talking.”
There was silence from Kylo, as if he was waiting for something else to be said or was perhaps surprised that Hux wanted to hear from him first, but it only lasted a moment before he began to speak angrily and candidly once again. “The formation she’s proposing for this mission is an old one, so common I bet the Resistance even uses it in practice drills,” he spat the last words out and turned his head sharply to the Captain for emphasis before looking back at Hux. He could feel it more prominently now, Kylo’s gaze on him, and Hux knew that from the vigor with which he spoke Ren was speaking from experience. “They’ll know how to pick off the entire left flank before we can even finish the approach.”
The Captain took a small step forward. “Sir, my squads are trained and-“ but her voice cut off when Hux raised a hand to silence her.
“Let me see the formation.” he said, calm, and held out a hand. She walked forward and handed him her data pad, which he flicked to life and scanned the information that was already pulled up. It was an old formation, reflecting even Imperial strategies, which didn’t surprise him. Avix was raised on a planet in the Outer Rim as well, and her passion for the Empire rivaled even that of some of his officers. Her dedication made her a fantastic member of the Order, but Ren was right, she lended herself to strategies the Resistance could easily counter. That fact that only made what Hux was about to do easier.
“As much as I have appreciated your strategies in the past, Captain Avix, in this instance Lord Ren is correct. This is too old of an approach and can be too easily countered. You’ll remember we’re trying to conserve our numbers, so it won’t do to lose ships and squadrons over pride.” He turned to Ren, eyes expectant. “For your objections, I take it you have a better plan?”
Ren straightened up under Hux’s gaze, posture prideful at having been declared the victor in that particular battle. “I do, General. I propose entering the base with a small ground team, which I can lead, while a smaller number of fighters than Captain Avix proposed distract from above. A base like this will concern itself more with preventing its destruction than the extraction of information, with an aerial attack they won’t be prepared for an infiltration.”
Avix scoffed, but Hux leveled a glare at where he knew for a fact her eyes saw through (thanking the stars that he at least knew how to work around one of the helmets in the room) and she straightened up, tense, nervous. “Good,” he said, simultaneously speaking his thoughts and addressing Ren. He held his gaze on the Captain a moment more before turning back to Ren. “You can present that in the meeting when the rest arrive. I expect you two to act like ranking members of the First Order, and not children having a spat, during this briefing, lest I regret listening to either of you.”
Hux moved then, walking past Ren and to the head of the table to prepare for the briefing. As he passed he could hear the Knight’s almost inaudible chuckle at the undignified noise Avix made after he had finished speaking, the small smile that graced Hux’s lips at the sound being the Captain’s only saving grace from being reprimanded even more for it.
Four days later Ren returned from his mission, the intelligence on the rebellion’s recent movements acquired and with minimal losses to both his team as well as their fighters. Once again Hux had to wonder if Ren could project his own emotions, because he was absolutely charged with energy later on the bridge with Ren standing to his side. He felt pride, and victory drenched in bloodlust, but more than that, Hux felt a pang of anticipation in his stomach from the knowledge that one day Ren would be returning from missions carried out for him, and that bloodlust would eventually be the path to his glory.
—-
It had been a month and a half since Hux had started his game, and to his subdued delight Kylo Ren was following right along.
Ren continued to lead various planet-side missions when the need arose, and on the occasion that someone suggested a tactic that Ren disagreed with, Hux always deferred to his opinion. That hadn’t been a part of the original plan, the intention had been to defer to Ren’s opinion only once to help establish his confidence. However Hux was pleasantly surprised to find that Ren was a skilled tactician, at least when it came to anticipating the movements of the Resistance, more so than he had anticipated. With every successful mission they gained an upper hand against the rebels and Ren gained back a bit of his old self. Slowly his dry sarcasm returned, along with his childish need to be in the middle of everything, but it didn’t go unnoticed by Hux that Ren now only acted that way around him.
It was a sweet taste of the subservience that he was beginning to foster in Snoke’s attack hound, and it made Hux eager for more. When he received summons to go planet-side for a negotiation he decided it was time to move his next piece into play.
It wasn’t rare for Hux to be called planet-side, especially now that the Order was beginning to spread its reach to new planets that required…delicate political handling in order not to incite riots. His business was evenly split between chatting up diplomats of Order-friendly planets for resources and protection of their trading routes and talking down politicians enraged at the sudden First Order occupation of their planet. Regardless of subject the meetings tended to be incredibly dull, but for once Hux found himself quite looking forward to the one on his schedule.
This time, instead of his usual protection detail of Phasma and one of her troopers, Hux assigned Ren to the task, alone.
Which was how he found himself sitting in a transport shuttle with Ren sitting next to him, a respectful amount of space between them. Hux took note that Ren’s sitting posture was absolutely obscene, with his ass on the edge of his seat and his back against the wall, reclined with his arms crossed over his chest. His legs were splayed, although he tilted them to the left, probably so his right knee didn’t bump with Hux’s.
The small viewports at the top of the shuttle showed that it was currently raining on the planet they had broken the atmosphere of, the droplets hitting the shuttle’s hull with a light pitter-patter that Hux couldn’t help but find almost calming. He attempted to hide his smile as he realized how perfect the weather happened to be for what he intended.
Hux was well aware that Ren could read minds. It was something of a concern when he had first encountered him but thankfully, Ren was not subtle in his mental invasions. There had only been one incident of Ren attempting to pry into his mind on the Finalizer, and Hux remembered the sensation well. There was a warmth that spread from the base of his skull, crawling up the back of his head. It hadn’t been entirely unpleasant, until he realized what it was, as random bits of his memories began to flit through his train of thought as if someone was sorting through them and flicking away the ones that weren’t useful. It was the resistance to the intrusion that hurt more than anything, turning the warm sensation into something akin to nails digging straight through his skull and into the soft tissue beneath. It only stopped when Hux had managed to back Ren into a wall, forearm at his throat, snarling that if he ever tried that again he would get every trooper on the ship to throw him out of the airlock.
Kylo Ren was a match for many, but Hux was sure a few thousand troopers at once could take him down. He had pictured the image vividly as Ren retreated from his mind.
Mind reading, as he understood it, had two levels. There were the thoughts one had to dig for, the ones that when guarded resulted in the screams he frequently heard from the interrogation chambers, and then there were surface thoughts. He knew that Ren could sense those without major intrusion, and while Hux was careful to keep his surface thoughts dull at all times (one of his most used tactics was running checklists in his mind constantly) to keep Ren from peering in, this time he found that particular ability useful.
Hux left out a thoughtful hum and did his best to project melancholy in both his mind and his body language. He let his surface thoughts flit between the diplomat he was currently reading a file on and memories of his childhood, and the rain of his home planet. He tried to cut the memories off halfway through, hoping it would build a sense of curiosity in the Knight next to him. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Ren stirred from his position, sitting up a bit straighter, his mask tilted almost imperceptibly towards Hux.
“Is something troubling you, General?” Ren finally asked, voice impartial due to the modulation of the mask. Hux leaned back a bit, looking once again up at the rain on the window and working very hard to keep his surface thoughts from betraying the small satisfaction he got from Ren being so predictable.
“It’s just the weather.” He coached his voice into a tone a bit more soft than usual. “I grew up on a planet where it rained most days, and if it wasn’t raining you still couldn’t quite see the sun. I suppose it’s giving me a small bit of nostalgia.”
The answer was honest, a simple fact about his life and easy enough to read in his file. Hux was almost certain Ren never bothered to read up on him, however, and childhood memories were intimate in their own way, perfectly suited for Hux’s purposes. It was time to establish himself with Ren as a comrade, rather than a colleague, and sharing tidbits of one’s personal life was the most assured way to do it. Childhood memories were as incredibly personal as they were incredibly dull, and their revelation would serve no future use against him, but create the illusion of trust.
“What was the planet’s name?” Ren asked, now turning fully forwards Hux.
Hux paused before answering, letting his eyes take in the rain droplets on the window. “It was a planet in the Outer Rim, called Arkanis.”
“Do you ever miss it?” Ren asked conversationally. When Hux took a beat to answer he added, “Arkanis, I mean.”
Hux let a small chuckle escape his lips at the thought as he brought his eyes down from the window and back to his datapad. As if he could ever truly miss that waterlogged hell of a planet. To be fair, the real hell was in his home, but with the weather as it was there was nowhere for him to go but his room after a fight with his father. At least at the Academy there were halls he could pace, a habit he kept on the Finalizer. “No, I wouldn’t say missing it is the right word.” He paused, finally turning his head to regard the mask beside him. “What about you?”
Ren bristled, and for a frightening moment Hux wondered if he pushed too quickly, but the moment passed and Ren’s posture relaxed. “I was born on Chandrila,” he began, pausing as if considering his words, “but I didn’t stay there long. My family traveled often. I don’t have any real memories of it, so there’s not much to miss.”
Hux nodded in understanding. The Resistance moved around so much it wasn’t a surprise that Ren wouldn’t have a true home planet to be nostalgic for. Before he could add anything else to the conversation Hux felt a jolt that told him the shuttle had landed, and the trooper piloting the ship walked out of the cockpit to inform them of their arrival. They both stood at once, Hux nodding and thanking the pilot for the smooth travel while he gathered his things, Ren standing vigilant by his side all the way until they re-entered the shuttle to depart, hours later.
The shuttle ride to the next meeting Hux needed to attend proceeded the same, as did the one after that. Hux was slowly learning more about the man behind the name of Kylo Ren, and he was allowing Ren to learn more things about him as well. The conversations following their first largely followed the same subject matter, childhood and relatively safe areas of their past. Ren had asked about the Academy which Hux attended, and in return Hux had managed to carefully word a few questions about Ren’s training, and what it was like to train in the ways of the Force. Hux confirmed his knowledge of Ren being an only child, and he confided in Ren about his own parentage, telling stories of his father and how he always felt a little closer to his mother, not that it mattered with both of them gone.
Eventually they broached topics more current in their lives, taking a more cultural turn as the missions went by. Hux would be remiss to not admit he was slightly fascinated by the differences between life in the Outer Rim and life in the heart of the New Republic, where Ren spent most of his childhood. The planets that Hux had interacted with for most of his life were, for lack of a better term, disasters. Many of them hardly supported food growth, and Hux was more familiar with standard military rations than anything Ren described in his stories. Ren seemed equally interested, if not a little horrified, by the way Hux described his upbringing. Frequently his questions revolved around what Hux hadn’t had access to, or had never encountered.
“So you’re telling me you’ve never had sweets from Naboo. Not a single one, imported or otherwise.”
Ren sounded personally insulted, leaning forward to emphasize his point. Since their conversations started Hux had watched as Ren’s posture grew more and more open, today he sat in the seat to Hux’s left, turned completely to the side, his right leg up on the seat and his right elbow resting on the chairback. Hux knew what the face under the mask looked like, but he wished frequently that Ren would just take the damned thing off when talking to him. For now he simply rolled his eyes. “No, Ren, I haven’t. I told you, I ate mostly rations on Arkanis. Our trade routes were limited, considering we were operated outside of New Republic treaties.”
“And after you left Arkanis?”
“I went straight into service and continued to eat, as you are aware, rations.”
“I wasn’t aware, actually. I take my meals in private. You really have no special General’s meal, then? Something a cut above the usual slop?” Ren sounded disbelieving and Hux made a point to glare at the insinuation that he was living cushy while his men were toiling away. He prided himself on being above those pleasantries, and knew that taking his meals in the officer’s mess with the rest of his crew both boosted group morale and boosted their loyalty to him. They saw him as one of their own, and Hux strived to keep it that way.
“There isn’t a ‘special General’s meal’ to be had, I take my rationed meals with everyone else. That being said, and as I stated before, no, I have not had sweets from Naboo.” Something occurred to Hux as he said the last word, piecing together why Ren would seem so offended. Was his memory correct that Ren’s grandmother was from Naboo? Amidala, wasn’t it? He was tempted to ask, but felt the information would be better if brought up by Ren himself. No need to show how much he knew already.
Despite his previous knowledge, Hux learned many about Ren that he never quite expected. He had apparently lived on six different planets before he went to train with Luke Skywalker. Hux inferred the latter fact, as Ren just referred to it as ‘left for training’, but he knew Ren studied under the last Jedi before Snoke got his hands on him. As it turned out Ren was fair pilot as well, having learned to fly very young from his father and his wookie copilot.
It was that line of conversation through which Hux learned that Ren was fluent in Shyriiwook, a revelation which caused Hux to expend all of his energy trying not to laugh, only to fail miserably. Ren immediately took offense, believing Hux’s laughter to be from disbelief rather than amusement. Hux took the opportunity to absolutely insist he be shown, which forced Ren to take his mask off and allowed Hux to see his face for the first time since he had returned to the Finalizer. The scar on his face from where the scavenger girl had felled him was slightly puckered, and his hair was in a number of small braids, longer than it had been before.
The distraction had only lasted a moment, as Hux almost fell off his seat from laughing at the ridiculous ways Ren had to twist his mouth to make the obscene noises of the language. After a cautious look Ren had laughed too, and Hux felt as if a moment passed between them. Laughter was something he didn’t get to enjoy often, and he had a feeling that perhaps Ren was the same. Outside of everything, he enjoyed that moment.
A week later, after Ren had returned to the ship from another successfully led mission, Hux noticed that he seemed to be in an abnormally pleasant mood on the bridge. It was an unspoken rule that they maintained their professionalism outside of their conversations on the transport shuttle, so Hux didn’t ask about it. When he returned to his rooms that night, however, he found a small box thrown onto his desk, having shifted some papers out of line upon its landing.
He looked behind him, almost expecting to see Ren there watching, but when he saw nothing he shrugged off his greatcoat and placed it over the chair at his desk. He sat, putting the box close to him and inspecting it, curious as to its contents. It was a light and delicate thing, striped red and maroon, with a loose fitting lid held on by a small but ornate ribbon. Hux couldn’t imagine Ren carrying such a fragile looking item all the way back from a mission, but when he lifted the lid there were no doubts as to who had placed it there.
Inside were two neat rows of three small multicolored pieces, each sprinkled with a shimmering gold powder. A small amount of light tissue kept the sweets in place and from sticking to each other, and upon closer inspection he saw that each was decorated with a small variation of patterns underneath the gold, in a color that complimented each piece.
It occurred to Hux that they must have been Nabooian sweets, the ones Ren had been so offended that he had never tried. He carefully picked one of them up to inspect it in the light that his desk provided. He had to admit that it truly did shimmer, and it was perfectly shaped, not a single corner curved.
He brought it to his mouth and took a tentative bite, surprised when the hard exterior gave way to a soft center. He chewed slowly, relishing the flavors and sensations that danced along his tongue. The outer shell was sweet, almost too much if not for the slight tang to it’s filling, a fruit flavoring that Hux couldn’t quite place the name of. He let the candy hit every part of his tongue, taking his time to savor it before swallowing.
Almost as sweet at the candy was the knowledge that Ren had thought to bring it to him. The mission he had gone on was a smaller one, and it would have given him access to a market where he evidently picked up the small package. It was evidence that Hux had wormed his way into Ren’s head, that Ren was thinking of him when he wasn’t actively around. So much so that Ren had gone out of his way to procure something to give to him, a step in the right direction that was coming faster than Hux had expected. More than anything though, he was thinking of Ren, hulking and huge, carrying such a small box with care just to bring it back to Hux, and it brought a smile to his face.
The sweets were distracting enough that he didn’t think too much about exactly why.
—-
Something was bound to go wrong, eventually.
In the month and a half since Ren began to serve as his escort on his assignments the Knight had warmed up to Hux more than even he had thought to expect. Hux had never been someone to be surprised when his plots worked better than anticipated, instead always opting to claim those fortunate outcomes as a result of his own careful planning. After he had found the sweets from Naboo in his quarters, however, he had begun to wonder exactly how starved for camaraderie Ren really was. Hux supposed it shouldn’t have come as a large shock, as he had never seen the Knight interact with anyone other than himself unless he was choking them or running them off with his damned lightsaber. How quickly Ren took to him was pleasant, but unexpected none the less.
Hux had expected his progress by that point to be only half of what he had already reached. Instead, it had become unsaid that wherever Hux was on the Finalizer, Kylo Ren was not far behind. Hux had even come to look forward to their missions alone, the banter a refreshing change from the formality he was required to uphold during his day-to-day routine. He had previously thought it would perhaps be a strain, interacting with Ren so frequently when he was still constantly monitoring his own persona, making sure he was saying the right things, reacting in a way that would keep himself in Ren’s favor. Instead he found himself surprised at the ease in which their conversations came, and how Ren’s own relaxed demeanor had seemed to bleed into his own. Hux soon found that tailoring himself to be the person Ren needed came more and more naturally, almost with no effort at all.
He pushed from his mind the implication that conversing with Ren no longer required strict calculations on what he wanted to hear because what Ren wanted to hear was him. At the end of the day, their relationship was about personal advancement, and nothing more.
Later Hux would blame his unease at the doubt in his control for the lack of observance that sent everything to hell.
The planet they had landed on for this particular talk was one Hux was relatively familiar with. It was a smaller planet bordering the Outer Rim, its surface a mix of marshlands and large patches of drier forests and fields that allowed for development. What was left of its inhabitants continued to reside in the sprawling estates that stood as remnants of the Old Empire’s wealth, one even rumored to have been a vacation home for the Tarkin family. The topsoil was not of concern for the Order as much as the core, however. Deep underground held large deposits of a material that had only one good purpose; strengthening durasteel. For years the Order had been mining the material in secret to be used on its fleet, allowing for an advantage that the Resistance was unaware of and thus could not counter.
That was to say, the Resistance had been unaware of it.
The first red flag should have gone up after he and Ren disembarked their shuttle, stepping forward into the sun to be greeted by Kraspen Secura, the head of an estate that closely bordered one of the Order’s biggest mines. The sprawling estate was surrounded by a mostly open landscape, the only exception being a line of forest bordering close to the east. Hux had met with Kraspen on numerous previous occasions, and had grown to know his demeanor quite well. He was an older man, in his late fifties with short salt and pepper hair, but age had failed to take the grace from his movements. He remained straight-laced and sharp in a way that Hux had respected, reminding him in some ways of his favored teachers at the Academy. Hux had become accustomed to their meetings, which were always lead by a formal greeting no matter how many times they came face to face. Kraspen’s accent was similar to Hux’s but much thicker, a remnant of his time with the old Empire.
That day, however, their greetings were more impersonal, and almost felt rushed. Hux found it peculiar, but said nothing, recalling his own recent thoughts of the burden of overt formality. He could imagine that for a man close to thirty years his senior that feeling could only be amplified, especially for someone who held no rank to require it at all hours. Kraspen motioned for them to enter the estate and Hux stepped forward, Ren following alongside.
The large doors closed behind them and the group made their way into the open area of the receiving room. Hux had always enjoyed trips to this planet, no doubt partially because he relished the opportunity to admire the architecture. He was comfortable in the sparse, clean lines of the Finalizer of course, but there was a part of him that marveled at the styling of the old Empire, the intricate detailing that went into the molding on the walls and the detailing of the floors that the First Order didn’t see fit to replicate with their small amount of resources. The estate they were in now was no exception, its ornamentation intricate despite showing its age. In contrast to the walls, floors, and pillars, which all appeared to be at least maintained with modern fixings, the furnishings and art were in slight disrepair, made long ago by Imperial craftsmen who were no longer alive to upkeep their more delicate and unique characteristics.
They continued to walk, each room reflecting the same contrasting state of repair as the first, and Hux began to let himself relax. Their footsteps echoed through the halls, a reverberation that produced a much more pleasant tone than the Finalizer's durasteel walls. Hux could pick out each of their footsteps, Hux’s light but perfectly spaced, Ren’s in time but much heavier. He always tended to stalk wherever he went, his footfalls acting almost as a warning signal for troopers in the area that his arrival was imminent.
He had seen a pair, once, do a complete about-face when they heard Ren coming without missing a beat in their steps. Hux would have reprimanded them for changing their appointed patrol route, had it not been so amusing to see.
It was reminiscing on that memory and being lost in the rhythmic echo from the old regal walls that caused Hux to miss when they took a new turn down an unfamiliar hall. It wasn’t anything overtly alarming, they had discussed land negotiations in a small variety of rooms through the estate, but soon the grand windows began to grow smaller, the ceiling dipping lower. Finally they came to a large wooden door with ornate scrollings and, by the looks of the small struggle Kraspen put up to open it, a significant weight.
Once it was open both he and Ren stepped in and walked to the center of the room, which appeared to be a much more private and neglected study. Hux heard the door shut behind them, which wouldn’t have been anything to note, until he also heard the small, metallic sound of a lock clicking into place.
They never locked the doors during these meetings.
There was no one to keep out.
Hux’s stomach lurched as every basic training instinct he had set off alarms in his head. He immediately spun around, just in time to see that Kraspen had pulled a small blaster from underneath his jacket and aimed it squarely at the back of Ren’s head, intent on taking out the biggest threat in the room first. Hux knew that even Ren wouldn’t be able to stop a shot he wasn’t expecting at that close of a range, skilled with the Force or no. Everything around Hux seemed to move impossibly slow, the adrenaline running through him like fire in his veins. Ren was just beginning to turn when the blaster fired, and almost without thinking Hux pushed him to the right, knocking Ren out of the line of fire but simultaneously allowing for the bolt to hit him square in the shoulder.
Hux couldn’t stop the agonized yell that escaped him as a sensation like fire erupted through his arm and chest, searing him with the worst pain he could ever remember feeling. He was thrown to the floor by the force of the blow, the jolt of the hard ground only making the pain shoot through the rest of his body, his unwounded arm instinctively reaching up to hold as close to the wound as he could. Already he felt his clothes soaked, a warm wetness pooling on the front of his uniform, and not a moment later he heard the familiar sound of Ren’s saber igniting, closer than he had ever heard it. Through squinted eyes could faintly make out Ren now standing directly above him, arm outstretched towards a now convulsing Kraspen and lightsaber crackling with dangerous intensity.
He heard something he barely recognized as a roar, but couldn’t tell if it was coming from Ren, the Resistance fighters coming through the door, or his own head still ringing with pain.
Hux only marveled for a moment at the raw power Ren seemed to exude before his senses kicked back in through the pain. He used his good arm to grasp for his communicator to call for immediate backup and extraction. Ren still stood above him, using the Force and his lightsaber to block the incoming fire and send Resistance troops flying into the wall. Hux counted ten nasty thuds before the flow of blaster fire seemed to stem. He imagined they were regrouping to a spot where they would have a better advantage than the slight bottleneck created by the layout of the one they were currently in. It was only a moment after the firing stopped before Ren was grasping Hux by his good arm, hauling him up to a standing position. He let out a pained hiss as the movement jostled his right side, sending another wave of fire through him.
“Can you move?” Ren asked, his grip on Hux’s good arm like iron.
Hux didn’t need to know how much blood he was losing, how the world blurred and blackened when he stood up was enough of an indication, but he knew his body enough to know that he had at least a minute or two of mobility. He tersely nodded to Ren, keeping his mouth shut tight in an effort to control his pain, and set his eyes forward to the door. Hopefully a minute or so would be enough.
Ren wasted no time, igniting his saber once again and throwing the doors apart with the Force, moving quickly through them and down the hall, clearing each corner before Hux could round it. Even with his right arm hanging limply at his side Hux was able to keep pace until they returned to the main part of the estate he had been familiar with, at which point the edges of his vision began to darken and he slowed. Ren turned and quickly went to his side, using his free arm to wrap tightly around Hux’s waist while the General threw his good arm behind his neck and over his shoulder. Hux noticed he felt weightless more than he had before, and realized that Ren was using the Force to help him along as well.
Moving became easier then and they resumed their pace, making their way steadily back to their shuttle, which Hux dearly hoped was still waiting. Each turn brought at least two more Resistance fighters who Ren easily dispatched either using the Force or reflecting their blasts with his saber. Hux took note as they moved that the weapons the fighters were outfitted with didn’t seem to be the heaviest grade, and there were far less than could ever have truly been a match for Ren. Thinking on the way Kraspen has aimed for Ren first, it suddenly occurred to Hux that perhaps killing them hadn’t been in the initial plan. The alternative made him push himself, quickening his steps despite Ren tightening his hold on his waist, steadying him in his exertion.
It seemed like an eternity before they once against burst into the sunlight, and Hux mentally whispered a thank you to whatever deity must have been listening that their shuttle was still positioned at the doors. It probably hadn’t even made it back to the Finalizer before everything went to hell. The shuttle roared as its engines held its place, ready to take off at as soon as it had its cargo. The co-pilot stood on the ramp with a blaster of his own, shooting down the straggling troops as Ren and Hux ran on board. Once they made it the shuttle began to take off, the ramp lifting as Hux heard the pilot radio for medical to meet them in the docking bay.
Such was the relief that Hux felt having made it on the shuttle in once piece that he didn’t remember hitting the floor, only that he suddenly felt cool metal on his back and found himself looking up at Ren’s expressionless mask.
The last thing he registered before he passed out was two strong hands gripping either side of his face.
—-
When he came to, all Hux could register was white while the smell of bacta assaulted his nostrils. He took assesment of himself, as he always did in the rare instances that he was injured on duty. The first thing he did was ball his hands into fists, relieved when his right hand moved in tandem with his left. Good, he still had function of his arm then. He registered that his head was on a soft pillow, and he was covered from the chest down in a heavy blanket. His shoulder ached, but at the moment Hux found it to be nothing he couldn’t handle. When he went to move his right arm he took note of the familiar stretch of fresh scar tissue, healed but delicate. Based on that he deduced that he had probably, at some point, entered a bacta tank.
Hux raised up slowly, propping himself up on his elbows to look around the room. His eyes glanced over the door, far enough away to assume that this was the private recovery suite. He continued to scan the room, eyeing the medical droid seemingly cowering in the corner with suspicion until he glanced at the corner of the room and nearly fell back down onto the bed. Standing awkwardly to the side, mask nowhere to be found, was Kylo Ren looking like he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t be.
They locked eyes, neither moving. Ren reminded Hux a bit of a scared animal, trying to determine which side of its fight or flight instincts it was going to follow. A moment passed where neither said a word until Hux determined he would have to be the first one to speak. “How long was I out?”
Ren tentatively stepped forward but stopped himself before he could get too close, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. “Four days. They had to reconstruct a good amount of your shoulder to keep your arm functional, you were in bacta longer than usual because of it.”
Hux groaned, knowing exactly the amount of paperwork he had waiting for him after four days of sleeping. The ship appeared to be functional, which he appreciated, but he had been at the helm long enough to know there were probably a hundred small things that needed addressing by him specifically that had gone untouched in his absence. He leaned more weight on his elbows, exasperated, but apparently put too much pressure on his newly healed shoulder causing a quick sting of pain to shoot up his neck and down his arm. He let out a small gasp and winced, quickly removing the pressure from his arm by twisting to the side, but then suddenly there were large, pale hands helping him sit up and adjusting his arm into a less painful position.
Hux looked up right before Ren retreated three steps backwards, his hands recoiling like they had been burnt despite being the one to touch Hux in the first place. They came to rest stiffly at his sides, as if he was trying to keep them from moving against his will. Hux’s eyes gravitated from Ren’s hands to his face, which was turned to the side, his eyebrows scrunched and mouth pressed to a thin line. It occurred to Hux then that after years of hiding behind his mask, Ren wasn’t used to having to school his face to the cool indifference Hux always wore. Hux couldn’t quite tell what emotion Ren was trying to cover, but it was obvious enough that he was straining to do it. Hux decided it wasn’t the moment to pry, as whatever emotion Ren was currently feeling was clearly one that he didn’t intend to share.
Regardless, Ren had been waiting, maskless, by his bedside. The fact did not go unnoticed.
Hux hooked his legs over the side of the bed and faced away from Ren as he pulled himself to his feet. He rolled his shoulder gently, testing exactly how much strain he could put it under. The bacta and medical staff had done their jobs well, he could tell where his muscles were still healing from being ripped apart by the blaster bolt, but overall he seemed to have good mobility. There were a few positions that stung, most when he moved his arm backwards, and he knew he would be unable to stand comfortably at parade rest for at least a few more days. It wouldn’t stop him from doing it, but he dreaded how sore he knew he would be at the end of his shift. “Well, while I’m glad to see the Finalizer still standing, I believe I've spent enough time away from the bridge. I’d rather skip the lengthy formal debriefing, if you’d care to tell me the outcome of our little scuffle planet-side. I trust the Resistance fighters in the area were neutralized?” He kept his tone conversational, looking back at Ren as he finished speaking.
“They were. I accompanied you back to the Finalizer, but the troops you called in arrived only a few minutes after our departure. The intel we received from the few Resistance members we captured and interrogated leads us to believe they had arrived a month prior, promising pardon on New Republic planets in exchange for trying to entrap you. They didn’t seem to be aware of the change in your personal detail.” Ren’s face grew troubled, and he broke eye contact to look down, the hands at his sides clenching into fists. “I should have sensed it, I don’t know why I didn’t see-“
Hux held up a hand and Ren’s mouth snapped shut. He looked up, eyes betraying him and showing his guilt.
Hux put all of his effort into stopping himself from looking thrilled, instead selecting the correct words to comfort.
“The families that reside on that planet come from a long line of Imperial heritage. Despite there not having been Jedi in decades, learning to guard yourself around Force-sensitives had been taught to them from birth. The Resistance plan had been well calculated, it’s reasonable that you didn’t see it coming.” Hux spoke in a factual tone, allowing his eyes to leave Ren as he spotted a uniform neatly folded on a chair across the room. He appreciated whoever had brought it to him be it a droid or Phasma, as he didn’t particularly care to leave the medical bay in casual attire.
He began to make his way over to it, and made it to the end of the bed before Ren spoke in a rush, so quickly he almost didn’t catch it.
“That shot was supposed to be for me.”
Hux stopped, turning to look back at Ren, reading his expression with interest. He noticed the slight flush creeping up the other man’s neck, the gentle shake of his arms as he clenched his fists tighter, but it was Ren’s eyes that truly betrayed him in the end. In them Hux did not find the frustration to match his posture, instead he found fear. A fear that, Hux was willing to gamble, had nothing to do with the fact that he could have been shot. It was the fact that Hux was.
There were perks to taking a blaster to the shoulder, it seemed.
When Hux spoke, he spoke slow. He knew his next moments would be paramount to how they both moved on from this event, and what Ren took from it. “Yes,” he said calmly, “it was for you. And it hit me. But what matters in the end is that we're both alive, and we’ll move on from it.”
There was a pause then, a moment that passed between them, where Hux stayed still and allowed Ren to think. There was no denying that the event would cause a dramatic shift in their dynamic. In many ways, Hux had taken a literal bullet for him. It had been nothing as dramatic as a holodrama, with Hux jumping in front of Ren in a true act of self-sacrifice, but regardless. It was a bullet that could have been avoided if he let it hit Ren, and he didn’t. Hux had made the choice (he decided it was a choice, not instinct, because that would imply a lack of thought) to put himself in harm’s way to ensure Ren continued to live. He could see the wheels turning in Ren’s head, and for the first time Hux wished he could use the Force so he could see them for himself.
Soon the moment passed. Ren straightened up and Hux instinctively did the same, heart beating at a slightly faster pace in anticipation. Ren’s expression stayed somewhat troubled, but his eyes lost the inkling of fear they held before. It was replaced with something Hux couldn’t define, but the breath Ren let out made him inclined to believe that it was relief.
“Yes, we will.” Ren stated simply. He walked forward and past Hux, grabbing his helmet which had been left on a chair next to the door. Ren put it on without another backwards glance, and Hux took the conversation to be over, turning to his clothes once again as Kylo walked out.
The heavy footsteps stopped abruptly, however, and Hux turned to see Kylo in the doorway, still facing away but one hand on the door frame, as if to keep himself in the room. There was a beat where neither of them moved until finally his modulated voice echoed through the room, synthetically calm.
“Thank you, General.”
Ren left then, robes flowing behind him until he turned and was out of sight.
Yes, perhaps being shot was not the worst thing in the world.
—-
After the attack that had left Hux in the med bay for days, it became policy that he would only depart the Finalizer for the most urgent of matters, instead sending other, less vital officers to negotiate in his stead. Hux admitted to himself that he was a tad disappointed, despite understanding the decision. He was aware that he enjoyed Ren’s company and conversation, but had underestimated exactly how much of a needed reprieve it had been until it was gone. Hux frequently found himself wanting to invite Ren to the officer’s lounge, just to be able to speak with someone on an equal level again. He carried conversations with his other officers of course, Phasma and Mitaka being the two he most often shared a drink with, but even in their company he found himself unable to let go of the ingrained formality of his tone.
Ren still lead planet-side missions, much to the ire of Captain Avix, who continued her contrary arguments to a level that seemed to surpass even Hux’s own, back when the presence of Ren in the room alone would put his mood sour. While originally having appreciated her role as a catalyst for moving his and Ren’s relationship forward, her arguments were now an irritation that was beginning to grate strongly on Hux’s nerves. In many ways her lack of faith in Ren was a lack of faith in himself and his leadership abilities, neither of which Hux was in any mood to allow.
Ren was his, and he knew how capable he was. Hux wouldn’t have tamed him otherwise.
Tamed. It was a word that brought a small smile to Hux’s lips as it crossed his mind, repeating in his head as he made his way to the bridge. Tamed was a word he felt appropriate for the way Ren had been responding to his subtle manipulations. When he had begun the process Hux had expected to incite in Ren a simple loyalty shift, utilizing his rage and unpredictability to his own favor. He had assumed that the act of coaxing Ren out from underneath Snoke’s heel would also reawaken the unpredictable, equipment destroying tantrums the knight lended himself to before he completed his training. It was a sacrifice Hux had begrudgingly steeled himself for in exchange for achieving his goals, but it had been months since he began and not a single console had been touched.
Instead, Ren was becoming absolutely calm around him. When both of them attended to their duties on the bridge Ren was almost always at his heel, as if he was still on escort duty despite being in the safety of the Finalizer. In meetings he took the same position, and Hux relished the way everyone’s posture straightened when he spoke, Ren’s imposing form behind him like a threat. Already Hux was being given a taste of the kind of power he could wield when he eventually took his place at the head of the Order, and it left him wanting more.
Hux allowed himself to consider that perhaps this was how Snoke liked Ren to behave on the rare occasions they were in the same room, obedient, like a shadow. If Hux was correct on that suspicion, it meant that his progress with Ren had advanced even farther than he may have realized, Ren already considering Hux to deserve similar respect as the Supreme Leader. Ren’s presence wasn’t unwelcome, by any means. He found that with Ren behind him, knowing he was there for him and not to destroy something or someone, Hux felt invincible. He felt like he could take on anything.
Hux was thirty paces away from the entrance to the bridge when he heard familiar footsteps fall in line behind him. Once again he felt the reassurance of the sheer power that Ren presented behind him, but was brought out of his thoughts by the Knight’s modulated voice.
“General, I have a request of you.” Even through the mask Hux could tell his voice was lowered, quieter than usual. Small requests were something Hux had assured Ren he could be comfortable asking, and Ren had asked for a few on occasion, but this was different. Generally his requests were rather blunt, but now Ren was walking beside him, taking a glance around before allowing a hand to hover on Hux’s hip, guiding them both around a corner and into a less traveled corridor. It was a more private request, then. All right.
They settled with Ren close to the wall and Hux standing across from him, his arms crossed and eyes attentive. “Your request, what is it?”
Hux watched as Ren’s posture straightened, his formality betrayed by the slight fidgeting of his hands, as if he was unsure of asking Hux for whatever it was he wanted. Hux made a mental note to reestablish himself as personally approachable, perhaps actually inviting Ren for that drink, when the modulated voice spoke up again. “There’s a planet we will be in the vicinity of a few cycles from now, it is one of the few places I can find suitable replacement parts for my lightsaber. I need to take a shuttle for a few days, unaccompanied, but I require clearance.”
Hux considered his options for a moment, knowing what Ren was requesting was against proper protocol. Solo missions were all but outright banned after the defection of FN-2187, and even for high ranking officials like Ren and himself an accompaniment was generally required. However Hux could also believe that, if the planet was rich in resources needed for Force-users, any troops sent would just be lost or slow Ren down.
He was still mulling over his options when Ren suddenly reached out and put a hand on Hux’s waist, making him take a step closer to the right, suddenly almost chest to chest.
Almost simultaneously a stormtrooper tightly rounded the corner in the usual brisk speed of their patrol march. Had Hux been standing where he was previously they would have collided, but in his present position they only just missed each other. Upon realizing how close they were to the two highest ranking officers on the ship the trooper all but jumped away, delivering a tense apology and quickening their pace until they were around the next corner and out of sight. Any other day Hux would have chastised them for taking the turn so sharply (patrols were trained to walk center to avoid that exact kind of problem) but in that moment he found all his mind could comprehend was the location of Ren’s large hand, still on his waist.
He was reminded briefly of the fire in his veins he felt when the blaster shot tore through his shoulder, but this one much more controlled, and definitely more pleasant.
Ren apparently also became aware of the placement of his hand, because after the trooper passed he pulled it away, as if the fire Hux was feeling was actually tangible and had burnt him in it’s blaze. Yet despite releasing his hold, Ren’s hand still hovered a few inches from where it had been holding, unsure. Hux watched the small muscle movements in his arm that showed his restraint, the way Ren’s hand opened and closed, as if he was trying to keep it from going back to Hux’s waist or deciding if it should.
Oh.
Oh.
While Hux had once joked to himself about seducing Ren to his side, he had meant it as a simple play on the ‘seduction to the dark side’ phrasing he had heard once from the Resistance. It hadn’t occurred to him to make the thought into a real plan, but everything in Ren’s body posture in that moment showed a startling mix of restraint and anxiety. Hux wanted to consider his next move, but he could sense that Ren was also fighting the urge to retreat, so instead he cleared his throat and looked up into the eyes of the mask. “Alright then, yes, I will grant clearance for the shuttle’s release. I trust you not to do anything stupid like get yourself killed, or worse, defect to the Resistance. Send a formal request through my channel and I’ll have everything prepared for your departure.”
With that he took a step back, returning to his previous position and giving both himself and Ren much needed room to breathe. Ren seemed to relax, his mask nodding sharply.
“Thank you, General. I appreciate your cooperation.”
With that, Ren was the first to flee, turning the corner and out of sight before Hux had a chance to respond.
—-
Hux spent the next week mulling over he and Ren’s latest interaction, silently thanking the stars that Ren was off-ship, giving him the room he needed to pace and consider his options without the distraction of having Ren behind him at every moment.
The first emotion Hux pinpointed in his musing was surprise that the thought of sleeping with Ren wasn’t, in all actuality, as repulsive as he may have found it months ago. In fact, it was more tempting than he had previously imagined, his imagination taking over if he let his mind wander too far.
Those wandering thoughts caught up to him one night, when the droll of paperwork allowed his mind to stray, musing over how Ren kept all of his hair under the helmet, which led to thinking about how thick it was, which in turn allowed Hux to picture his hand, gloved, carding through it before grabbing a fist-full and yanking back-
He had slammed his datapad down and stood abruptly, fighting off the flush in his cheeks and the stirring in his loins at the mental image of Ren, head bent back, long neck exposed, gasping in pleasure and pain.
He was careful to mind his thoughts, after that, but the subtle want he felt wouldn’t quite leave the pit of his stomach. The more he tried to think of a single reason not to act on his growing curiosity and desire, the more Hux found himself coming up empty-handed. As Ren wasn’t a formal member of the Order, fraternization regulations we not applicable. Instead, the more he thought, the more he began to relish the idea. He could own the Knight entirely, not just in loyalty.
Ren was his, and if Hux wanted to sleep with him, he could.
After Ren returned from his mission (not dead or with the Resistance, as promised), Hux began to consider exactly how he was going to approach the subject. As they no longer had their private shuttle rides, and the rest of their interactions were surrounded by officers or members of the crew, Hux began to research where he could find Ren alone. The answer came courtesy of Ren’s tracker, which Hux had taken to monitoring.
As it would turn out, because no one knew what he looked like Ren would sometimes practice maskless in the training rooms seven decks below Hux’s quarters. With the aid of the ship’s security cameras and Hux’s top level clearance, he was able to see that Ren would leave his quarters in standard issue First Order training clothes, carrying a small bag over his shoulder. He would go to one of the smaller training rooms, close the door, and then depart again a few hours later. He repeated the process once every few days, at off hours when no other troopers frequented the training rooms. The one Ren frequented was also out of the way, and held older equipment than the rest, ensuring he was not generally disturbed.
Four days after Ren returned from his solo mission, Hux decided it was time he began seriously training again.
He had a daily workout regimen in his quarters every morning of course, as well as various weights and a pull bar that all easily fit in his closet for storage, but it had been a fair amount of time since he really worked up a sweat. That was his reason for showing up, in standard issue training clothes, to the room Ren happened to be training in at that exact moment. He even made a show of looking surprised. Ren may have been flustered by seeing Hux so unexpectedly, but with his face red from exertion there was no way to tell for sure. He did, however, immediately stop the repetitive movement of his drills to look up and level a gaze in Hux’s direction.
“General, what are you doing here?”
Hux scoffed, making a show of putting the bag he had carried over his shoulder down with a thunk on the floor near the door. “I believe it’s obvious, this being a training room. As the door wasn’t locked I’m assuming you aren’t opposed to company.”
As he spoke Hux turned to face the pad next to the door, punching in his officer’s code and removing access for anyone underneath his clearance. He didn’t want a random trooper walking in on them training or taking part in…other activities, depending on how well his plan worked. Admittedly it had been a number of years since Hux had tested his flirting prowess, but if Ren’s lack of social skills were an indication of his own he found it fair to assume they were on the same level.
Still, he had perhaps practiced a few lines in his head, just in case. Hux didn’t appreciate being out of his element in any modicum, especially when it came to Ren. Intimate relationships were not something that he allowed himself to form during his rise to General, knowing that anyone he made the acquaintance with was just as likely to end up in a shroud than in his bed. He had always maintained a professional distance because he had to be flexible. The person of his rank that he slept with one year could be the superior he needed to eliminate the next. Personal connections would only hinder his advancement in one way or another.
But Ren? Ren was the last step. Adding another layer to their slowly-forming bond could only serve to strengthen their eventual power against Snoke, and it was that fact that allowed for Hux to finally take something for himself. The thought of it alone was almost enough to elevate Hux’s heart rate before he even began training.
So, there he stood, alone in a training room with Kylo Ren, the door locked behind him and the camera feeds discreetly cut off before his arrival.
Ren was staring at him still, the training staff in his hand lowered but his grip still iron tight. He was near the end of the daily routine that Hux had grown accustomed to watching. Ren always began slow, first stretches, then weights, then full-body exercise. He would end on his saber technique, knowing his body was at its peak and able to perform the various moves and maneuvers he had been trying to perfect.
Occasionally Hux would watch him pause to observe himself in the mirror, standing straight and glaring at his own reflection for a number of minutes, chest heaving, before going back to his training harder than before. He didn’t need to be Force-sensitive to know what Ren was doing. The scar that bisected his face was a constant reminder of his defeat on Starkiller base against that damned scavenger girl, and seeing how Ren threw himself into his training every time he so much as glanced at it was enough to tell Hux that he still felt its sting. It was comforting in a way, to know that someone else besides Hux was still haunted by that nightmarish day.
“You can pretend I’m not here you know, I won’t interrupt what you’re doing,” Hux said casually, walking to the wall that held various pieces of training equipment. There were staffs of varying size, ranging from ones almost as tall as Hux himself to the one Ren was currently using, comparable in size to his lightsaber. Hux ran his finger gingerly over its matching second. “Unless, of course, you would like a training partner.”
This time it was Ren’s turn to scoff, straightening up and raising his staff to rest on his shoulder. “Partner? I didn’t take you as one for a fight. Have you wielded one of these before?”
It was the answer Hux had been hoping for, a challenge instead of a refusal, and he couldn’t stop the smirk from spreading across his lips before he pulled the second training staff from the wall. He walked over to where Ren stood in the open area of the middle of the room, eyes confident and posture slightly languid. “I’ll have you know that saber technique was standard education at the Academy,” he paused, leveling Ren a challenging glare, “an education at which I excelled.”
Ren returned Hux’s confident look with one of his own, complimented only by a squinting of his eyes that Hux now recognized as mischievous. He stepped back to the edge of the open area, turning once again to face Hux and raising his staff to a formal first position. Had this particular match happened before Starkiller fell, Hux knew the tension would have been much different. Now it was stripped of its potential malice, the challenge between them friendly instead of hostile. He wasn’t afraid of Ren seriously hurting him, only making it easier to fight with everything he had. Hux raised his staff to first position to match, nodding quickly in acknowledgement before moving into action.
Ren was the first to charge, a move Hux could have anticipated a mile away knowing the Knight’s brass behavior on the battlefield. Hux quickly moved to his left, dodging Ren’s saber just in time and bringing his own up to block, pushing back so Ren had to shift his weight to the right. That allowed Hux the chance to spin and position himself at Ren’s back, swinging down in a motion that Ren blocked with only a second to spare.
The surprise Ren couldn’t hide from his eyes was satisfying to see, almost as satisfying as knowing he was still as quick on his feet as he was the last time he had a partner to train with. His speed was always his strongest advantage, followed closely by his smaller size and intense observational strategy. Ren may have had the Force to anticipate his opponent’s moves, but Hux knew well there were many ways to achieve that end. Looking at Ren in that moment he could see the way the muscles tensed in his right shoulder and arm, preluding the moment of bringing his saber up, allowing Hux to once again block the blow and use Ren’s strength to throw his swing off target.
They continued like that, countering each other’s strengths with their own, for long enough that Hux lost track of time and he found himself appreciative. They had both since lost the competitive, boastful attitudes they entered the match with, the only sounds in the room coming from their feet on the floor, the loud clacking of their sabers against each other, and the occasional grunt when one of them landed a blow. Their movements played together almost like a dance, Ren’s strength and force against Hux’s speed and size. The other thoughts on Hux’s mind seemed to fade, his only focus on the man in front of him and the saber in his hands. After a few hits he learned the exact way Ren held himself, and without his bulky robes Hux could easily see the way his body tensed in preparation for his next move, his muscular physique serving as his tell.
Finally, by the time Hux had exerted himself past any other training exercise he could remember, he saw his opening. One of Ren’s hands had left his saber in order to twist the way he needed to block Hux’s blow, forcing Ren to compensate with the other. In his concentration he had make the oversight of leaving his left flank slightly open, leg out of stance. Hux took the opportunity to hook his foot around Ren’s ankle and pull, sending him tumbling down to the mat. Ren looked stunned for a moment as he registered his new position, on his back with Hux’s saber hovering over his neck.
They were both breathing heavily, and Hux tried as hard as he could to push the satisfaction from his brain at seeing Ren with his arms and hair splayed out, on his back underneath him, right where he was supposed to be. He relished the moment for a beat longer than quite proper before pulling his saber back, offering Ren his hand in its place. “I believe that’s enough training for today, don’t you think?”
Ren looked at Hux’s extended hand, still surprised before remembering himself and reaching for it, allowing Hux to help him back to standing. He stretched, catlike with his arms high above his head, before bringing them back down and walking to put his saber away. “I believe so. I must say though, General, I didn’t anticipate you handling yourself so well. Perhaps next time I won’t hold back as much.”
After he placed his saber back on the wall Ren turned, beginning to rummage through his bag for his towel and water container. Hux knew from watching the video feed that meant he was planning on leaving soon. If he was going to take the leap and escalate their encounter, Hux would need to do it now. Pulse still thrumming from the intense training he decided to ride the adrenaline as to not lose his nerve.
“I can handle much more than you think I can, Ren.”
Ren was turned away and Hux was grateful, because it allowed for him to observe the Knight’s body language without trying to look like he wasn’t paying attention. Ren had apparently caught the double meaning of his words, because Hux could see the almost imperceptible pause in his movement, a break in the action of pulling his bag over his shoulder that only lasted a fraction of a second, but was there. Hux saw it. He held his breath waiting to hear what Ren would say in return.
“I didn’t mean to imply you incapable, I simply didn’t anticipate your skill with a saber.” Ren turned now, his voice even, face wearing a mask of indifference that Hux could see straight through. His ears were slightly red poking out from his dark hair, a tell that made Hux’s stomach do a small flip. They were only a few steps away from each other so Hux took a breath, gathered his courage and walked forward, stopping slightly closer to Ren than would be deemed entirely professional.
When Hux spoke again, his voice was low, hushed, despite knowing there were no cameras to eavesdrop on what he was about to say. “I think you’ll find I have skills with a number of things you have not anticipated, if you would like to see them.”
It didn’t take careful study to read Ren’s face then. Hux was close enough now that it would barely take any movement to reach out and touch the other man, or be touched in return. Their breathing was still labored from exertion, the only noise in the room, and Hux waited. Their eyes met and he watched as a series of emotions flashed over Ren’s face, starting with surprise, moving to embarrassment, and finally settling on something slightly akin to fear. He looked like an animal who had been caught in a corner, eyes only leaving Hux’s to flit to the door.
Hux swallowed nervously. That was not the expression he had been counting on.
He was about to say something to backtrack or diffuse the sentence that had just left his lips, but he didn’t get the chance. With a rushed “Ishouldgo-” Ren hurried past him, almost contorting his body to keep their shoulders from brushing. Not a moment later, too soon for Ren to have walked at a normal pace, Hux could hear the sound of the mechanical doors opening and closing. Left in Ren’s wake was complete silence.
Hux stood there, dumbfounded, realizing that for the first time since he had began to read Ren he may have miscalculated.
Hux immediately wanted to go over every moment of the past week in his head with a fine tooth comb, to try to decipher where had had gone wrong in his calculations, but another, more pressing matter stood out at the forefront of his brain. He had just potentially shattered months of precious work, eliminating all progress he had made with Ren to bring him under his heel. There was a good chance now that it would all be erased, that his flirtation would push Ren away from him, that he would lose his shot all because he had gotten cocky and let his guard down for a chance to sleep with him.
Before Hux could think too much on it he walked to his bag, picked it up and hastily threw it over his shoulder before hurrying out the room himself.
He only hoped the next time he saw Ren they could pretend like nothing had happened, and that not everything had been lost.
---
The following few days gave Hux’s nerves no mercy, as Ren was missing from all of his usual daily activities. Every time Hux arrived to the bridge for his shift, he did so alone. The security cameras showed that Ren hadn’t been to the training room since their ill-fated encounter, and his tracker stayed unmoving in his quarters. For each day that Ren avoided him, Hux could feel his worry seeping into something closer to anxiety.
Surely, such a small advance didn’t warrant shutting himself away for that long. Ren would have to emerge eventually, and then Hux could gather the information he needed to rectify what he had done. He ran practice conversations in his head for the varying levels of damage that could result from his pompous overstep while he waited, until he was sure that no matter how far back he had set their path, he could recover from it.
It was late on the fifth night since their encounter and Hux sat alone at his desk, one finger of whiskey left of the three he had poured himself, when he heard the door to his quarters hiss open. Hux was immediately set on edge, fingers closing around the glass so hard he was surprised it didn’t break in his grip. He attempted to steel his expression into neutrality as he counted the footsteps coming through the small sitting area at the front of his quarters, but found the whiskey hindered his ability to truly mask his uneasiness. Instead he settled for a look of annoyance.
“Ren, I assume you have a reason for entering my quarters unannounced?” Hux watched as Ren entered the room, but didn’t move from his desk chair. He swirled the whiskey in his glass to give his hands something to do aside from digging his nails into his palm. He had been ready for his confrontation with Ren, but hadn’t imagined it to happen during an unexpected after-shift visit in his own quarters.
Ren seemed to sense his discomfort, taking a step back before reaching up to hit the seals of his helmet. He pulled it off and set it gently on the dresser behind him. Hux could truly see him then, and to the General’s large relief, he didn’t look as murderous or indifferent as his worst case scenarios assumed he would. Instead Ren was looking around the room, taking in his surroundings but making a point to direct his gaze anywhere that wasn’t Hux’s face.
He wore the same expression he did in the training room, like an animal cornered, but this time he arrived of his own free will. Hux felt his nerves slowly begin to relax in favor of curiosity, and even a hesitant amount of hope.
“What is it? Is there something the matter?” Hux set the glass down at his desk, rising from his chair to face Ren fully.
Ren finally looked him in the eyes then, pulling from a well of his own determination that showed as fresh resolve on his features. “Why are you doing this, General?”
Hux’s breath caught in his throat. There were a number of options for his response, but his first strategy was always the same; find out exactly how much the opponent knew. Playing stupid was beneath him, but without more knowledge of exactly where Ren stood Hux knew there would be no way to properly engage him. “I’m not sure I follow.”
Ren didn’t skip a beat, beginning to cross the room to him, words falling from his mouth as if they would be lost if he didn’t speak them now. “I’m not an imbecile, Hux,” hearing his name so informally caused Hux’s stomach to flip, “You know what i’m talking about. What you said, in the training room. Even before that, how you’ve been acting around me. I want to know why you’re doing it. What do you want from me?”
Everything inside of Hux tensed as he recognized the moment for exactly what it was. He knew what he said here would make or break everything he had spent months-no, years working to. His chance at overtaking Snoke, his position as General, and everything that Kylo Ren had to offer him, all hung together by words Hux chose to speak next.
It wasn’t exactly how he had pictured it.
Ren finally reached where Hux was standing at his desk. Opting to stand to the side of him rather than in front. His placed his right hand on the desk, leaning on it and allowing his eyes to take in the sparse few things Hux kept there before returning them to the General’s face. At such a small distance, they told Hux everything he needed to know. What he had initially taken for fear was, in actuality, nervousness. Caution. Ren’s eyes searched Hux’s face for any indication of what the other man was thinking, trying to gauge what his reaction would be.
They lingered on his lips for a fraction of a second longer than anything else, and it was then that Hux knew what he would do. He circled around Ren, until the Knight was between Hux and the desk, and placed a hand on his shoulder. He pushed gently and was met with no resistance as Ren allowed his knees to buckle, leaning on the edge of the desk, eliminating their small height difference and allowing Hux the satisfaction of the Knight having to look very slightly up at him for once. He slotted himself between Ren’s legs, could hear Ren’s quick breathing, could almost feel his pulse from where he was standing, and he knew this was his.
“What I want from you?” Hux near-whispered, voice quiet and deep and only for Ren. He reached to hold Ren’s chin in his hand, tilting it up to lock eyes and emphasize his words. “You’re mistaken. Yes, you’re capable in the field and a competent strategist. You’re a prodigy brought to life, an unstoppable power that could raze everything in your path. You have a fire inside of you that can’t be smothered, and stars, it’s brilliant. But I want nothing from you, Ren.”
Hux paused to truly take in what was before him. Ren was gazing at him like his entire life hung on Hux’s every word, like there was nothing else in the universe that could give him what Hux was giving him in that every moment. Staring into Ren’s bright, glassy eyes full of sadness and devotion, Hux spoke his next words and found they came from a place much deeper than his strategic mind.
“I want you.”
Ren make a broken noise and closed the gap between their mouths with a searing kiss.
Hux returned it in earnest, allowing a small moan to escape him when their lips crashed together. Despite the fervor in which they kissed Hux found that Ren’s mouth was soft and plush, so unlike the rest of him that Hux failed to resist a small grin, an action returned with a cautious probing of Ren’s tongue. Hux returned all of Ren’s advances, and they soon found their bodies pressed together, Hux nearly crushed by Ren’s strong arms around his waist and back. His own hands were similarly occupied, one fisted in Ren’s long hair and the other still on his shoulder in an attempt to steady himself. Ren shifted and Hux could feel an unmistakable bulge in his pants, the feeling sending a shiver of pleasure up his spine.
Finally they separated, both breathing heavily, Ren’s hands fisting into Hux’s uniform in an attempt to keep him from moving when he felt the other man try to pull away.
“We’re not doing this on my desk.” Hux breathlessly asserted, once again trying to pull away and migrate them to his bed. Ren appeared to be having none of it, letting Hux escape only to once again grab him, shoving him roughly into his abandoned desk chair. “Ren, what the hell-”
He was cut off by the most beautiful sight Hux had ever seen. Ren, every bit as imposing and powerful as ever in his Knight robes, sank to his knees before him and immediately began to palm Hux’s growing erection. Hux let out a moan of pleasure and involuntarily bucked his hips, which caused Ren to suck in a breath, eyes widening in reverent wonder. He immediately leaned forward and began to mouth at Hux’s rapidly hardening cock through his trousers, and it took everything for Hux not to grab a fistful of black hair, desperately wanting to free himself from his pants but fixated on what Ren would do next.
Taking Hux’s willingness as encouragement Ren began to work opening the fastenings of his pants. After struggling for a moment finally, blessedly, Hux’s cock was free of its constraints. Ren’s expression was reverent as he leaned forward without hesitation, wetting his lips and teasing circles around the head with his tongue before taking Hux’s length into his mouth.
“Kriff,” Hux hissed, hand flying to once again tangle in Ren’s hair. The Knight set a quick pace, almost sloppy in his eagerness to have all of Hux in his mouth. Ren worked his tongue and hollowed his cheeks as his head bobbed between Hux’s legs, his enthusiasm following through to the rest of his body, hips thrusting against the air and Hux’s boots. It was absolutely lewd, and the sight of it elicited a moan from Hux as well as a shallow thrust of his hips, his cock hitting the back of Ren’s throat. As it did he felt a vibration of Ren letting out a low moan, mouth going slack as he tried to take Hux as deep down his throat as he possibly could.
Curious, Hux used the hand he had fisted in Ren’s long hair to push his head down, watching as his cock disappeared into the Knight’s perfect, soft mouth and once again feeling the vibration of a long moan as it hit the back of Ren’s throat. He repeated the motion, and finding the same result began to speed up his actions, fucking into Ren’s mouth in earnest. The sounds echoing through the room were wet and obscene, but Ren’s mouth was pliant and he was on his knees, before Hux, right where he belonged. It was all almost too much, and Hux soon felt his orgasm building. He reluctantly stopped, pulling Ren off him with a wet noise, hand still tangled in his hair. Ren looked up at him with wild, hungry eyes. His face was flushed, his lips bright red, wet and glistening.
“Get on the bed,” Hux commanded, voice heavy, and Ren obeyed without a word. He stood (Hux did not miss the distinct wobble of his legs as he did so) and made his way to the bed on the far wall, climbing onto it and moving himself to the center. The regulation black sheets matches his robes, fanned around him. Hux followed, stopping at the foot of the bed to regard his prize, overcome with a lust he hadn’t felt since he was a teenager. He licked his lips hungrily before issuing his next command.
“Strip.”
Ren didn’t hesitate before obeying. The entire affair was less dramatic than Hux had imagined it would be, although admittedly he had always imagined himself fumbling to get the Knight’s complicated robes off, not watching. Still, with every new patch of skin revealed Hux’s restraint waned. As each scar was revealed he was overwhelmingly hit with the need to run his tongue over them, to map out the marks of Ren’s body until he knew them as well as he knew his ship, or anything else he owned. As Ren finished ridding himself of his clothing Hux began to do the same, releasing the clasps on his uniform and slipping out of it, pulling his boots and pants off and freeing himself of his undershirt.
Ren finished undressing a moment after Hux did, laying completely nude in the center of Hux’s bed, cock hard and resting against his stomach. It took every ounce of restraint that Hux had to not let his mouth water at the sight. He had known of Ren’s physique, of course, but seeing it in a training room was much different than gazing at it all laid out before him. Laid out for him. The lines of Ren’s muscles flexed tight underneath his skin as he breathed, cock twitching and already leaking precome without having been touched. Hux allowed his eyes to linger there, the heat of his own body rising, glad to see his late-night imagination hadn’t been exaggerating and that Ren wasn’t only muscularly endowed. There would be other nights to entertain what to do with that, but tonight Hux knew exactly what he wanted.
He moved to crawl over Ren, who was sprawled underneath him in much the same way he was on the training floor, a halo of hair around him and more beautiful than Hux could have ever dreamed. That the universe would give him such a gift was recompense for something he couldn’t recall, surely. He leaned down to capture Ren’s lips again, one hand sliding down his chest to lightly stroke his cock. It twitched in reaction, and Hux relished just how painfully hard Ren was. Perhaps he hadn’t been touched in years. Perhaps Hux was his first.
Perhaps not, if the way Ren lifted his hips and let out a filthy moan was any indication. Oh, truly a gift indeed.
His patience running thin, Hux moved the hand that was teasing Ren’s cock farther down, and the lightest brush of his fingers against Ren’s entrance elicited an absolutely stunning moan from his lips. Hux’s hand retreated (he swore Ren whined) and moved up to retrieve the bottle of lube he kept in his bedside table. He popped the bottle open with one hand and coated his fingers liberally before returning it to its previous position.
Hux planted feather light kisses along Ren’s jaw and neck, relishing the way the younger man squirmed underneath him, rubbing against the lubricated fingers once again teasing his entrance. Hux finally took pity, sinking his teeth into the tender flesh of Ren’s neck as he penetrated him. Ren let out a cry more beautiful than any music Hux had ever heard, back arching and hips desperate for more. Hux worked his finger while releasing his teeth from Ren’s neck, gazing at the fresh, red mark with smug satisfaction only to be pulled by Ren into another searing kiss. His tongue was eagerly licking into Hux’s mouth, his entire body rolling from the neck down to where Hux had a firm grasp on his ass. Hux kissed him back in earnest, relishing how Ren moaned into his mouth as he pushed a second finger into him.
Slowly he began to scissor his fingers, Ren moving his hips in tandem, pushing Hux’s fingers deeper every time he spread them. By the time Hux had slipped in a third Ren was practically begging. Hux loved every second as he opened Ren up underneath him, committing every moan, every facial expression, every movement to memory. Finally it became too much and Hux removed his fingers, leaning back on his haunches and slicking his cock. Ren gasped and spread his legs, reaching up once Hux’s cock was slick and kissing everywhere on Hux he could reach, his jawline, his neck, his chest. Hux lined himself up with Ren’s entrance and pushed in.
Ren’s eyes fluttered shut, his mouth frozen in a silent gasp as his entire body tensed before relaxing again. Hux leaned back and took it all in, every detail of Ren’s face, the way his neck and ears almost glowed, his bruised lips, the way his back arched in an attempt to get Hux even deeper inside him still. Despite Ren’s attempts, Hux pushed in slowly, enjoying every sound that came from Ren’s mouth before he finally bottomed out, both of them breathing heavily. Hux locked eyes with Ren as he pulled out and thrust in again, repeating the process with agonizing slowness until Ren hooked his legs around Hux’s waist, and his resolve finally broke.
Hux’s pace became hard, unrelenting, and left Ren a gasping mess underneath him. He pounded into Ren as hard as he could, his head buried in the crook of Ren’s neck and one arm hooked around his shoulder to keep them steady. The snap of their hips coming together was sharp and wet, and could just be heard above the steady stream of grunts and moans coming from their mouths. Hux moved his free hand to the top of his simple headboard to further brace himself and allow a better look at Ren’s fucked-out expression, eyes screwed closed and mouth agape with his gasps.
He was responding so well that Hux was tempted to keep him there for days, to take him apart in every way he could, to reduce him to nothing but the sensations he was feeling now. That thought didn’t last, because then Ren said ”Hux,” in a throaty moan that echoed through the room and he suddenly felt like a man possessed. He pulled out, ignoring the pained moan Ren let out in response.
“Turn around.” Hux commanded in a voice that he barely registered as his own, and Ren immediately obeyed, flipping himself over and propping himself up on his hands and knees. The second he was done Hux was on him again, pushing roughly inside and not waiting a moment before restarting his merciless place. It felt better than anything he could remember, having Ren underneath him, offering himself to Hux in every way, but along with it came a sudden wave of possessiveness. He pulled Ren up by the hair and bit into the tender flesh of his neck, above the mark he had left before. The sudden act of dominance was apparently what Ren had needed, and in that moment he tensed and cried out, spasming around Hux’s length as his orgasm overtook him. Hux reached down with the hand not in Ren’s hair and grabbed his cock, stroking him through it. Between the rhythmic tightening of Ren’s body and his overstimulated whimpers, Hux’s own orgasm wasn’t far behind, and he tightened his grip as it hit him, seated to his hilt and cock pulsing deep inside Ren’s ass.
Hux’s grip loosened as the last waves of his orgasm left him, but Ren stayed leaned against him, panting and covered in sweat and streaks of his own come. They breathed together in the ensuing silence, both coming down from their respective highs. Hux took the opportunity to pull his softening cock out, coming back to himself enough to be disgusted as the mess they had made of his sheets, Ren’s come streaked across them and his own pooling where it dripped from Ren’s ass. The Knight looked like he was about to collapse, leaning forward after he was released, his shoulders slumped.
It occurred to Hux, while he looked around to remember where he had at least placed his briefs, that he wasn’t quite sure where to go from that exact moment. For once he had forgotten to consider ten steps ahead, so taken by Ren’s willingness that he had thrown his usual consideration out the window in exchange for carnal pleasure. He was still mulling over what to say when out of the corner of his eye he saw Ren reach to touch his abdomen, no doubt also considering their current state of filth.
“You can use my ‘fresher, if you’d like.”
Ren’s head lifted to see where Hux gestured to a door set in the far wall. He seemed to consider it a moment before swinging his legs over the bed to stand and walking away from the bed. It was only in the doorway that he paused, like he had done in the medical bay after Hux was shot, one hand on the frame. He turned his head, just slightly, to give a brief glance back at Hux before turning forward once again and entering.
He left the door open.
Hux followed without a word.
---
As Hux hadn’t invited Ren to his quarters the first night, he felt no need to start. Most days Ren would arrive without invitation in the same manner as always. He was, as Hux had imagined him to be, absolutely perfect. It was no small matter that his body was worthy of reverence of the highest regard, taunt muscle that flinched under Hux’s most gentle touch, more receptive than he had any right to be. Ren never submitted so easily as he did during their first tryst, but in the end they knew who would come out the victor, and to be fought with was a thrill more than any kind of hindrance. Regardless of what Hux took, Ren was always willing.
Yet still, Hux found himself troubled. For lack of a better term, Ren was much more…affectionate, than Hux had anticipated him being. A few weeks after they began their affair, as Hux referred to it, Ren had fallen asleep in Hux’s bed before he had the chance to dress and leave as usual. He had just returned from a fairly perilous mission and, finding no real harm in it considering he was clearly exhausted, Hux had opted to let him sleep rather than force him out. He awoke with Ren’s large arm around his waist, the warmth of his body pleasantly pressed against his back, his breath tickling the back of Hux’s neck. They didn’t speak of it after they woke, but the next night Ren made no move to depart to his own quarters, and Hux made no insistence that he do so. Weeks after that, instead of gripping Ren’s wrists as he usually did in bed, Hux found their fingers intertwined, and didn’t bother to correct it. Their post-coital rituals generally involved a trip to the refresher, but not before Hux had to wiggle out from Ren’s arms, a task made difficult by the way Ren buried his face in Hux’s hair, smiling and holding him close.
It was much more than Hux was used to, on a number of different levels. He had entertained sexual partners previously, but they were generally one night affairs on a planet with someone outside of the Order, and never did one stay the night, or hold him in bed, or kiss him when he was exhausted from work. He had never had someone to expect when he arrived to his quarters after shift, let alone someone who wanted to be there.
Yet still, there was one thing threatening to ruin it all. When Hux would finally be away from the precipice of ruin, he didn’t know, but as long as Ren was beside him he doubted it would be anytime soon.
Until recently, Ren had always obeyed their unspoken understanding that Hux’s mind was to stay his and his alone. Surface thoughts aside, it was the only thing that had kept Ren from seeing Hux’s true intentions in strengthening their relationship. When Hux had decided to sleep with him, he had assumed it would be a purely physical element to their relationship. In his miscalculation of exactly how close their liaison would bring them, Hux hadn’t prepared for their newfound intimacy, and thus was at a complete loss when Ren tried to enter his mind one night in bed.
They were relaxed in their post-coital afterglow, the sheets of Hux’s bed thrown aside, mustering the energy to enter the refresher as to not fall asleep in their own spend when Hux felt it. A familiar warmth at the base of his skill, pleasant but unmoving, hesitant. Ren was gently asking permission, one of his fingers tracing Hux’s temple. So absorbed in their afterglow it took Hux a moment to realize what was being asked of him, but the moment he did his heart shot into his throat and he moved his head back sharply from Ren’s touch. The warmth retreated immediately, replaced instead by a calming feeling, no doubt Ren using the Force to subdue the panic that had quickly made its way through his veins.
Ren hadn’t tried to enter his mind again since then, taking Hux’s reaction as severe discomfort with the idea rather than a need to hide. However he would still occasionally trace a finger along Hux’s forehead, or temple, or the back of his head, and each time Hux moved slightly away, disengaging the contact, an unspoken question and answer that did not change. It was a relief to find that Ren didn’t push the subject, but that relief also came with a number of emotions Hux didn’t expect, nor particularly want.
Like the sadness and slight regret he felt when Ren pulled his hand away as if it had been struck every time Hux rejected that particular advance.
Hux understood why Ren wanted access, it didn’t take an incredible amount of thinking to deduce the reason. Ren was affectionate in almost every way, for someone who had never had a mind of his own, sharing his with Hux was just another part of that intimacy. In many ways, it almost pained Hux to deny him, but not doing so wasn’t an option.
If he let Ren into his mind, he would see everything. How his feelings had been carefully cultivated by Hux’s manipulation, how every one of their interactions had a purpose and something to gain. From there it would all fall apart, he would lose his shot at his empire, Ren would leave, would think-
Think what? That Hux didn’t care about him? He shouldn’t, because as Hux asserted to himself (near daily, now), he didn’t. The loss of his attack dog, acquired through months of effort, was the only thing of his concern. What Ren thought of him was no more important than that.
These were the things that kept him awake at night, however, with Ren curled next to him, his warmth radiating through the sheets and loosening the tension in Hux’s muscles. That was another reason to keep Ren around at night after their near nightly fucks, the man was virtually a space heater. Hux looked down as he traced a finger lightly down Ren’s spine. His body was littered with a constellation of moles and beauty marks, which Hux found much more appealing than his own freckles, no matter how many times Ren traced them with his fingers. Every time he stripped Hux’s breath caught a bit in his throat to know that all that beauty and power was his.
As if summoned by Hux’s musings, Ren stirred in his arms. He stretched the arm that lay over Hux’s chest before placing it back in its previous position, seeming to settle again before apparently noticing through his sleepy haze that Hux was not breathing evenly as if in sleep. Ren opened his eyes then, still squinting, and moved the arm on Hux’s chest up to cup the side of his face.
“You’re still awake.” Ren’s voice was gravely, the tone it only dropped to when he was just waking up, lazy and heavy.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
Hux shifted, trying to appear more at ease than he had been. “No reason, I just can’t sleep.”
For a blessed moment, Hux thought Ren might let it go and drift back to sleep himself, but he wasn’t so lucky. He felt as Ren’s hand on his face crept up, cradling the side of his head as Hux once again felt the warmth in the base of his skull, the warmth of Ren asking to be let in. He rolled his head to break the connection, too tired to jerk away. “Ren, no.”
“Why?” Ren repeated, voice more awake as he propped himself up to properly look Hux in the eyes. Perhaps it was from being roused from his sleep, but Hux could sense a thread of irritation laced through his words and on his face.
He tried to think up a lie on the spot, but what ended up coming from his mouth was more truthful than he intended, a tired confession more than a deflection. “Because I’m fearful of what you’ll see.”
The harshness that had grown on Ren’s face dissolved. When he spoke again, his voice was softer. “What do you think I’ll see?”
Hux buried his face by Ren’s hair, taking a deep breath in and closing his eyes, trying to imagine he was anywhere but where he was right now. A difficult task, with Ren’s weight on his chest and scent in his nose. It was becoming harder to lie, but with his face obscured and a blanket of drowsiness over them both, Hux still managed. “I’m not sure what you’d see, that’s why I’m fearful. I keep things in my head for a reason, that reason being that I intend for them to stay there. And there are some thoughts that I don’t even like thinking of myself, let alone with someone else in the room, stars forbid with someone in my mind. I know it’s nothing to you, but it’s not to me.”
Ren was silent for a moment, and Hux asked every god in the universe for Ren to accept his answer and go back to sleep. As the silence stretched on he thought perhaps he had, but soon there was a shuffling as Ren moved himself up on the bed, no longer resting on Hux’s chest but instead to his side, wrapping the General’s smaller frame in his arms and pulling him close to his chest. Hux’s head found the crook of Ren’s neck and settled there, never getting tired of the encompassing feeling of Ren wrapped around him.
He was about to drift back into sleep himself when Ren whispered sleepily into his hair. “It’s not nothing to me.” When Hux didn’t respond he spoke again, almost inaudibly. “You’re not.”
Hux wanted to say that he was sorry, but sleep overtook him before he could.
---
As previous events had proven to him, and as Hux had known all his life, something was always bound to go wrong.
It wasn’t the worst thing that could have happened, at the start. Ren was commanding a small squad of troopers through territory that the Resistance had been creeping slowly into, foolishly hoping that the First Order wouldn’t notice. Despite their frankly haphazard efforts, the Order did notice, which was why Ren was sent for what was supposed to be a simple reconnaissance mission in an area of the planet the Resistance hadn’t seemed to settle in yet. They were to travel to a Resistance encampment miles away, infiltrate what they could, gather as much intel on the Resistance’s intentions there, and report back for extraction.
After they reported to the bridge that they were being engaged by what appeared to be a Resistance scouting party, Hux had been irritated, but not much more. That team was some of his best between Ren, Captain Avix and their team, so he knew they could handle a few Resistance troops. It ran the potential for exposure, but if there were no survivors he was sure they could gather what they needed before the dead were missed.
After they reported more Resistance soldiers incoming, Hux began to dig his nails into his palm. Something was wrong, and he had the same gut feeling from right before he was shot months previous. Still, he stood resolved.
After their communications dropped entirely, Hux moved into action to call in immediate backup and an extraction team.
After Ren’s tracker went dark, he didn’t sleep for three days.
The backup squadron had landed only to report a deserted and completely wrecked scene. By their count half the troopers Ren had arrived with were dead, but with them were double as many Resistance soldiers. Once a video feed could be established from the Finalizer to the planet (at Hux’s demand) he could see that the trees and even the ship had the telltale markings of Ren’s lightsaber, but there was so much damage done he couldn’t reasonably puzzle out a timeline, where they had gone, how Ren’s tracker had been destroyed or at what point in the battle.
There was a large circle of char where an explosion had apparently gone off, and Hux tried not to focus on the possibilities. Ren’s body was not among the dead, so he had to have been alive when the fighting was over. There were a number of possibilities for what could have happened and where Ren, Avix and the remaining troopers could be found, but this felt almost too familiar. The first theory that Hux could think was of the Resistance playing a similar game as before, vying for intel in the same way the Order did from them, in which case the likely scenario was that the survivors were taken hostage. Proceeding under those assumptions, Hux ordered Phasma to join the extraction team and begin the hunt for the Resistance. It was a few days travel between their current location and the closest known base, and that would hopefully allow enough time to catch up and recover whoever was left.
Despite having his plans set in motion, when Hux went to his quarters he did not find sleep. The first night he had made a valiant attempt, completing all his nightly rituals and crawling into bed, but he couldn’t fight the chill that washed over him. He had slept alone plenty of times since he and Ren had become...involved, they didn’t spend every single night together, but those nights alone he knew where Ren was.
He knew that, eventually, he was coming back.
After almost eight hours (Hux was many things, but a quitter was not one of them) of lying in bed with his eyes closed, attempting to get any rest that could come to him, he rose. He finished his morning routine in an oppressive silence and went straight to the bridge to monitor the extraction efforts. He maintained almost constant communication with Phasma, demanding updates every hour even if they were nothing but a confirmation of the continued effort. He sent out squadrons of T.I.E. fighters to monitor all possible Resistance bases or sympathizing areas for any ships attempting to leave atmo. He had technicians working to restore communications, only to be told that, after finding no signal jamming issues, the ground team’s communication devices had most likely been destroyed instead of interrupted.
Seven hours into his shift, the squad led by Phasma reported to have found the remains of a hastily packed Resistance outpost. The video feed he had established showed little but the traces of sloppy track-covering, no signs of struggle or blaster fire to be seen, and relief and dread both clawed at Hux’s inside in equal measure. Surely, if his troops were able to fight, they would. What did the lack of struggle truly mean?
When his shift was over that night, Hux didn’t bother trying to sleep. He instead stayed at his desk, eyes glued to his datapad as he reviewed every report he could find on the planet they had been tasked with investigating. He couldn’t decide what would bother him the most, if he had carelessly looked over an indication of the trap once again, or if the Resistance had managed to so perfectly lay one out that there had been no oversights to catch.
Hux was still wearing his gloves, despite most of his uniform having been shed in steady increments as the night had progressed. He sat in his desk chair in his boots and pants, but missing his usual greatcoat and top, leaving above the waist only his regulation black undershirt. Underneath his right glove was a bandage around his palm, hastily wrapped when he realized that he had sunk his nails far enough into his flesh to draw blood two hours after returning to his quarters. He had then put his gloves back on despite the discomfort, every distraction losing him another moment he could use to scour information. He had found himself more frustrated by the loss of time than the blood that dripped onto his undershirt.
It was through his obsessive working that Hux managed to quell the thoughts that he had been trying to avoid about why, exactly, he was so unsettled by Ren’s absence. However he found himself twisted into a vicious cycle that, upon the third night, finally made those thoughts unavoidable. He had dove into his work because he didn’t want to think about how unprofessionally worried he was for Ren’s safety, but the only reason he was working so relentlessly was for those worries. If he didn’t care for Ren, he would be asleep in his bed right now, not working himself to the bone in the attempt to convince himself that he did not care for Ren. It was the consistent circular logic that caused him to slam his datapad onto his desk, standing abruptly to pace around the room with his hands behind his back, just as he would on the bridge.
Ren’s disappearance had finally pushed him over an edge, past which he could no longer justify or rationalize to himself the way he acted and felt around the Knight, and the thought alone distressed him. He was finally forced to admit that he had deviated from the plan, Ren was never meant to be more than a means to an end. Yet ever since they had begun their personal relations, whenever Hux’s mind drifted to thoughts of Ren he found they focused on his quarters or empty shuttles, their time shared there, more than any daydreams of storming Snoke’s citadel. Even then, when his mind did indulge itself with the visions of his grand future, they were no longer the same.
Hux used to envision Ren on a leash at his feet, or not there at all, tossed away once his usefulness had worn itself out.
When had he stopped being able to envision Ren anywhere else but at his side?
Desperation clawed at Hux’s heels until pacing his room no longer satisfied him. He turned quickly, grabbing his uniform top off the bed and putting it on before taking his datapad and striding briskly out of the room. The Finalizer was a massive ship, and in the middle of third shift there was no one to interrupt his thoughts. The click of his boots on the hard durasteel floor echoed off the walls of the long corridors and calmed him as they had many times before. His steady, military pace acted as a metronome, soothing him and letting him once again focus on his work. Who needed music, when you could have order.
He studied the datapad in front of him, a map of the region they were searching pulled up with markings to indicate where they had found evidence of recent disturbances. They were scattered and random, an almost zigzag pattern but moving steadily north. Everything Phasma had discovered had been clearly left by the Resistance, items and tracks inconsistent with the standardized equipment the First Order used for shelter and emergencies. She had been given explicit and private instructions from Hux to report anything to him that even looked like it would have been from Ren, from a charred tree to a piece of fabric.
There had been nothing.
For every moment they spent without finding the missing squad the chance their search could turn universe-wide, versus only a sector of a god forsaken planet, increased. Each dot on his data-pad corresponded with a time of discovery and general direction, allowing Hux to piece together a pattern of movement as well as he could. He held his datapad in one hand, tracing the trail with his other, trying to make sense of what he was seeing for what felt like the hundredth time.
There was something about the pattern that was familiar, but he still hadn’t been able to place it. When the third data point was added and Hux had begun to sense the familiarity he immediately pulled up every training docket he could get his hands on, cross referencing all known Resistance tactics and trooper standard evasion guides, but with no luck. Yet still, the feeling that he knew that pattern wouldn’t leave him. Hux knew there was something he was missing, and as he traced the trail once again he wracked his brain to remember exactly where he had seen it before. It was an old memory, too far back to quite remember it fully, like his childhood and most of his early days at the Academy-
Hux stopped short, the echo of his shoes halting and leaving him in silence. He studied the pattern, tracing his finger along its lines to assure himself of what he was seeing. Yes, it was a little butchered, some spots off by ten degrees, but it was there. It was old.
It was Imperial.
Avix had been sent with Ren to the ground squad, and her body hadn’t been recovered. If Ren was injured or unable to argue, if she was leading them through-
The Resistance wasn’t setting the course, they were one step behind. As the Order was chasing them, they were chasing Avix and her squad-
With shaking hands he instinctively reached for his pocket before remembering that his communicator had been in his greatcoat, still draped over the desk chair in his quarters where he had left it in his haste to escape. Without thinking twice Hux took off into a sprint, the even quality of the echo of his steps losing themselves to his fervor. He had to get on the com, he had to tell Phasma.
He knew where they were going next.
---
As Hux discovered, being in the med bay was actually much worse when you weren’t the one submerged in bacta.
Phasma and her team, after Hux had made contact and instructed them on where to go, had managed to circumvent the rebels tracking Captain Avix and her squad to locate them first. They had been only two clicks away from where Hux had anticipated them being. His small relief at the news had been shattered when it was immediately followed by a frantic order for medical to meet them at the docking bay for emergency transport of Kylo Ren. It seemed to take ages for the extraction team to make it back to the Finalizer, and although Hux felt a weight off his shoulders that Ren was at least alive, it was replaced by an intense worry for his condition. From the communications he was able to understand that Ren was, as he had suspected, unconscious and in need of a bacta tank.
Hux had waited anxiously for the shuttle to enter the landing bay, resisting the urge to pace in front of the troopers and medical team who stood by his side. As soon as shuttle had arrived and the platform lowered medical rushed aboard, Hux only being able to catch a brief glimpse of Ren’s prone form before it was carted away in a rush.
He saw far too much red for his comfort.
As a debriefing later explained, shortly after landing planet-side Ren and his squadron had been ambushed by a fleet of Resistance soldiers. Evidence pointed to the attack as yet another botched attempt to capture and interrogate members of the Order for information, this time setting their sights on troopers rather than a high ranking officer. Once again, the Resistance had apparently not anticipated Ren’s presence on such a low-priority mission. From the other side of the table Avix had admitted, for once not a hint of her grudge present in her voice, they would have been overwhelmed and captured had it not been for Ren.
They had managed to fight enough to force the Resistance into a temporary retreat, however it was not before one of the soldiers could throw a thermal detonator that exploded only feet from Ren. The blast had shattered the belt buckle his tracker was housed in, done significant damage to his torso, and thrown him back into an abandoned speeder, on the hull of which his helmet had made a sickening dent. Avix and her remaining squad had been forced to transport Ren as he faded in and out of consciousness, doing what they could for his wounds and keeping him as alert as possible.
That damage took two days in a bacta tank, and another three outside of it to repair. Ren’s thick robes had managed to save most of his skin from the burns that usually followed proximity to a thermal detonator blast, but he hadn’t been spared much else. Hux was informed that he had multiple broken ribs, numerous lacerations sustained in the fight before the detonator went off, and a new, thick red scar over his stomach where the impact had been most severe. His head injury had luckily been less severe, closer to a concussion than brain trauma. The head of the Finalizer's medical staff told Hux that he would make a full recovery after a period of rest, but also informed him that had they been even one day later in extracting the squadron they would have been conversing in the morgue, rather than the medical bay.
Hux was never more grateful for Avix and her damned Imperial tendencies.
After Ren could leave the bacta tank he was transferred to, ironically, the same room Hux had been in after their previous sideways encounter. The first night Ren was submerged in the bacta was the first Hux had slept since he left. His nerves had eased enough that his need for sleep finally managed to overtake him, knocking him out until his datapad beeped indicating the start of Alpha shift. Hux had spent the better part of the time Ren was in bacta catching up on the work he had neglected in the days prior, finally feeling his order restored by the time he was given word that the next phase of the Knight’s recovery had begun.
That was how Hux came to find himself at Ren’s bedside, having dismissed all medical personnel and droids so no one would see him showing more affection than professional circumstances called for. He held one of Ren’s hands in both of his own, having brought it up to his forehead while his elbows rested on the edge of the bed. Two of his fingers floated over Ren’s wrist, the beat of his heart soothing him in much the same way that the echo of his boots on the durasteel walls had done what seemed like ages ago.
Hux’s eyes were closed, and he wasn’t aware how long exactly he had been there. He remembered his datapad chiming twice, indicating two shifts had passed since he arrived to find Ren hooked up to a number of machines, sick to his stomach with how awful he looked. He hadn’t seen Ren in a bed that wasn’t his in months, and he wanted nothing more than to have him transferred to his own quarters to recover, but he knew that wouldn’t do. Their affair was a closely guarded secret. If the few officers close enough to Hux to notice anything peculiar did, they said nothing.
His heart sunk at the realization that if Ren had truly died on that planet, he wouldn’t have had an opportunity to mourn. He was past trying to pretend such thoughts did not upset him.
Hux knew what he had to do. Part of being a strategist was to know when you were cornered, and when to abandon your previous strategy in favor of a new one. He had arrived at an impasse at which, if he wanted to achieve the same end goal of his Empire, he needed to alter his plans. His intentions with Ren had never included showing him the truth of his goals from the start, but it also hadn’t included developing feelings for the man he once referred to as a mere attack dog.
There were now two options before him, both unfortunate in their risks. The first was halting their romantic relationship, hope that action wouldn’t shake Ren’s loyalty to him past recovery, and try to take Snoke out as quickly as possible before everything fell to shreds. It was, all things considered, the less risky of his options.
The other was the option he dreaded and desired in equal measure, a higher risk but a greater reward than Hux had ever imagined. In opposition to shutting himself in completely, he could instead open himself up, allow Ren into his mind, and in the process see everything. He would have to show it all from the start, every negative feeling, every night spent planning, every thrill when Ren responded in the exact way his prodding pushed him to. With all of that would also come what Hux hoped to be his redemption. The reverence he felt when Ren was near, the warmth of their bodies together at night, the pleasure at Ren’s affections, the protectiveness that had stopped being fed by a sense of ownership long ago in favor of something much, much deeper than Hux had ever before allowed. The absolute devastation at the idea that Ren would be gone from him forever. Finally, his ambition for them together, ruling the galaxy at each other’s sides.
Then he would have to hope, perhaps even pray, that Ren wouldn’t kill him immediately for his treachery.
It was all going to come down to Ren, in the end. The man who had taken the carefully constructed plan Hux had in his head and thrown it so off the rails he now had to bare his throat in full. His entire life had come down to praying that Ren would go against the master that had given him everything, in the hopes that Hux could give him more. He was a fool, in every conceivable way. The Knight could easily murder him and yet all Hux could imagine was draping him in the finery of their Empire, seeing him strong and bright and not hooked up to machines that droned on with sounds only comforting because they continued to affirm his heartbeat.
It had been hours since he had made his decision, and Hux was debating whether Ren would prefer a gold or red insignia when he felt the still hand held between his own twitch. His head snapped up and eyes flew open just in time to see Ren’s own eyes open, squinting in the bright light. Hux remembered how disorienting it was when he woke up in this room and allowed Ren to register where he was, watching as his gaze drifted from the ceiling, to the equipment next to him, and eventually to Hux, still holding his hand and probably looking a mix of hesitant and terrified.
When Ren said nothing Hux squeezed his hand gently. “How are you feeling?”
Ren groaned in response, shifting to push himself up, and Hux let his hand go in favor of helping him do so. He remembered how the Knight had done the same for him, back when their touches weren’t laced with familiarity, and one waiting at the other’s bedside was something unexpected. He briefly wondered if Ren was surprised to see him as soon as he woke up, or if after months of their liaison he had expected it. He didn’t think on it long, Ren’s prying eyes surveying Hux’s face as soon as he was upright. He was sure that despite his rest his eyes still held the shadows of bags that had formed under his eyes during the search.
“How long was I out?” Ren questioned, echoing Hux’s words from months prior.
“You were on the planet for three days after the ambush with varying states of lucidity, it’s been five since you were extracted.” Ren nodded solemnly, bringing a hand to his stomach, the bandages exposed when he sat up. He ran a hand over it curiously, and Hux cleared his throat. “You took a grenade to the stomach.”
Ren ran his fingers over the top of the scar peeking from underneath the bandages before placing it back to his side, looking up at Hux as if he hadn’t been listening. “Have you been here the entire time?”
“For most of it, yes. I caught up on the work I had missed when you were submerged in bacta, but I requested notification when you were out. I have been here since.” Hux didn’t break the eye contact as he spoke, no, he was done running from what had formed between them. His assuredness seemed to give Ren pause.
“Why?”
Leave it to Ren to ask the exact question Hux had been avoiding, the one that vexed him day and night for the last week, as soon as he could. Hux braced himself, taking Ren’s hand that he had been holding previously and bringing it to the side of his face. It was a gesture he hadn’t initiated himself before, paranoid that even touching his head in such an intimate way would give Ren access to his thoughts. He needed it then, to show Ren what he was willing to do, willing to give.
When his voice came out, it was near a whisper. “I can’t tell you here, but I will soon. The medical droids will be here to assess your condition once I’ve told them you’re awake. Once they dismiss you, come to my quarters.” His grip on Ren’s hand tightened, pressing it closer to his face, the pressure was almost painful on his temple but Hux couldn’t bring himself to care. “I promise you, I’ll show you everything.”
The look Ren was giving Hux reminded him of their first night together, looking up from dark lashes, tentative hope mixed with hollow desperation. Hux removed Ren’s hand from his face before he could get overly eager and enter his mind in that moment. It wouldn’t do, if Hux was going to do this it needed to be right. It needed to be when they were alone, together, in a place where he could bring himself to open.
Before he turned to leave, Hux placed his own hand in Kylo’s soft hair and leaned down, giving him a kiss that lasted longer than what would be considered chaste, but still seemed to end much too soon.
He committed it to memory, in case it was the last one he ever took.
---
Hux was sitting on the edge of his bed, hands balled into fists on his knees, trying to even out his heart rate when the door to his quarters slid open and Ren stepped through, wearing the regulation First Order training garments instead of his usual robes. It had taken a few more hours for Ren to convince the medical staff he was fit to at least return to his quarters and Hux had been spending the entire time trying to go over exactly what he would say in his head before he realized that he wouldn’t necessarily be talking at all. The thought had occurred to Hux that perhaps he should wait a few more days before doing this, until Ren had healed more, but he shook the thought from his mind. The waiting would only drive him insane, and if he had been dismissed from the medical bay then he was well enough to handle it.
If he wasn’t then, well, if Hux needed to run for his life, it was best to have any advantage he could get.
The familiarity and ease in which Ren walked through the room sent a twinge of guilt through Hux’s stomach. Ren had always been open with him, from their time alone on the transport shuttles to the last kiss they shared before he went on his most recent ill-fated mission. He had never hidden anything from Hux, and seeing his open posture as he stepped through the threshold of his bedroom made Hux want to pull him onto the bed and kiss every inch of him until they both forgot what they were there for.
Hux scooted back onto the bed, sitting on his haunches and patting the space in front of him indicating Ren to sit as well. The Knight obeyed, movements careful, as if he was aware that every instinct Hux had in his body was screaming at him to run. If Ren was reading his surface thoughts then perhaps he was, but it wasn’t just the risk of attack that was making Hux nervous. It hadn’t been a complete lie when he said he liked to keep his thoughts in his own mind, this kind of sharing went against almost everything he had grown with in the Order. He had never let anyone so close to him before, but with everything he held dear riding on his bravery in that moment, he knew it would be worth it.
Ren crawled onto the bed and adopted the same stance as Hux, legs tucked neatly underneath him, seeming much more comfortable in the position. Hux imagined his comfort was perhaps from practice, maybe that was the pose he meditated in, or a position he took when speaking with his masters. As he thought it Hux was struck with the realization that he had never asked much about Ren’s past further than what he had already known, the loss of that information feeling like something he wanted to reach for but couldn’t.
Hux swallowed before speaking, mustering his courage and straightening his back as he would addressing any other issue. “Alright. I believe you know what I’m going to let you do.”
“You’re going to let me in.” There was nothing but anticipation in Ren’s voice. Hux noted the wording, that Ren didn’t say into his mind, that he was just letting him in.
“Correct.” He said it as evenly as he could, but the word came out tense. He took a deep breath to steady himself, and when he spoke again his voice was smoother, but with a plea running underneath it. “But you have to promise me something first.”
“Anything,” Ren breathed, his anticipation getting the better of him, but it was the devotion in his voice that made Hux’s heart leap into his throat.
Hux reached out with barely steady hands, slowly bringing Ren’s hands to the sides of his face, allowing his large fingers to brush against his temples, like he had done so many times before Hux would move away. “You have to promise me you’ll see all of it.” He laced every word with meaning, knowing that these were the words that would seal his fate. That after all of his careful planning to get Ren under his wing, his fate was wholly and entirely in the other man’s hands. “Don’t stop until you’ve seen everything. No matter what you find, you have to go through it all, you have to get back to this moment. Promise me you will do that, Ren.”
He watched as Ren’s anticipation faltered, replaced by a slight hesitation at Hux’s words. He considered him a moment, studying Hux’s face, and Hux returned his gaze. He made a point to memorize every mole, every dot, the way his jaw hung slightly crooked and the crease of his eyebrows. He didn’t care if Ren could see him do so now, he needed to be able to remember what his knight looked like if everything went to hell. Finally the moment passed and Ren answered, barely a whisper. “I will. I promise.”
Hux closed his eyes then, still holding Ren’s hands at the side of his face, and let himself go.
It was much more pleasant than the first time Ren had dove into his mind. The warmth that had only previously tickled the base of his skull spread through his whole head, and despite his nervousness he couldn’t help the way his body relaxed at the sensation. It felt almost surreal, sharing a mind with someone. Ren’s presence wasn’t what he had anticipated, with how brutish he could be Hux had expected for him to tear through his mind with vigor, but instead it felt more like Ren was taking a leisurely stroll through his thoughts, observing with careful consideration, as if Hux’s memories were a museum and he was merely a guest. He could see what Ren saw, reliving his memories as if they were long-forgotten holos, and watched as they were carded through with careful consideration.
The first thing Ren pulled in full was the day they met, Hux standing in the landing bay as Ren exited the shuttle sent from Snoke’s citadel. Hux remembered feeling irritation more than anything else, having just been informed that his command of the Finalizer would be shared with a man who wouldn’t even show his face. I bet he’s deformed Hux remembered thinking. The memory faded and he could feel something akin to amusement radiating from the warmth enveloping him, but soon his memories flashed by faster, skipping over large parts of their daily bickering in the years to follow. It seemed Ren was just curious as to his first impression of him, then.
The memories slowed the closer they got to Starkiller destabilizing. Hux wasn’t entirely thrilled to be reliving the feeling of the ground breaking apart underneath his feet, the weight of an entire planet collapsing following him wherever he went, the sight of Ren in a patch of blood stained snow. That particular thought was much more painful to remember now than it had been before. At the time Hux had felt nothing but rage and defeat, but now he felt the same emotion he had seeing Ren broken in the medical wing, worried and slightly sick.
Ren seemed to bristle at the image as well, and Hux remembered how Ren would look at his scar in the mirror as he trained. He was overcome with a need to soothe him and the sudden realization that, connected in that way, he could. Hux sent his feeling forward, trying to extend the warmth he felt through Ren’s hands and into his own mind. Their emotions tangled together and he heard Ren let out a contented sigh before feeling a pressure on his forehead and breath ghosting his lips. Hux brought one of his hands to the back of Ren’s neck, relishing the intimate touch of their foreheads. He even felt himself relax a bit as Ren continued through his memories, skipping through when he was finishing his training until he found something interesting.
Kylo Ren was absolutely perfect.
Hux’s stomach dropped.
Ren dove into the memory with excitement, spurred on by the encouraging words and Hux fought every instinct to break their connection. Ren was seeing and feeling everything Hux was in that moment, the eagerness, the excitement, the calculation.
The last gave Ren pause. The excitement from before fizzled.
Ren gently paged through to the next memory, of Hux giving him his first assignment, but this time Ren didn’t linger on the memory itself. Instead he searched Hux’s mind for his thoughts in that moment and found how he had looked at Ren like an animal rather than a person. He felt the joy when Ren had responded to his subtle manipulation the way Hux expected, and the triumph he felt when the Knight left the room at his plan working. He felt that word echo through his brain like his steps on the walls, plan, plan, plan.
He felt Ren lift his forehead away just a fraction of an inch but Hux held tight, the hand on Ren’s neck and the other covering his hand squeezing in an iron grip. You promised me Ren , he thought with a tinge of desperation, pulling Ren’s forehead back to his own. You promised me, you have to see it all.
Ren hesitated, and the warmth Hux had felt in his head started to disappear. It was replaced by what felt like a chill, the kind of gust that cut through his clothes and straight to his bones. It was similar to the first time Ren had been that deep in his mind, but Hux’s lack of resistance meant there was almost no pain as there was before. Finally Ren began to move again, hesitantly going through the rest of Hux’s recollections. He looked at every interaction slowly, taking in all of Hux’s careful calculations about how to entrap him, but Hux pushed his own emotions as well in an attempt to soften the blows. He had truly enjoyed their time together on the shuttle, and the candies Ren had given him had made him happy. When Ren returned from a mission, the pride Hux felt wasn’t soley from his ego. Hux knew that he was almost begging, but he felt he couldn’t let those moments go without showing Ren everything that he felt, showing that he was in his veins long before Hux decided to put him there.
Their path through Hux’s mind stopped when they arrived at their last planet-side mission together. Hux could tell that Ren had felt the spike of fear he experienced when he knew Ren was being aimed at, and it made Ren grip his head tighter. Apparently Ren was even less fond of watching their escape play out than Hux was, and they moved on. Ren next arrived on the day he had touched Hux’s waist in the corridor by the bridge, and he saw that Hux had noticed Ren’s body language and how it gave away his desire. Hux could feel anger at the base of his skull and realized that it was from Ren, mad at himself for being such an open book and letting Hux see through him in such an intimate way. Hux wanted to reply that he was glad he did, but the sudden fear that perhaps Ren wasn’t anymore instead propelled them forward. Ren heard Hux’s internal appraisal of the Knight’s physique when they trained together and Hux swallowed, suddenly remembering exactly how much he wanted to bend that physique over the nearest flat surface. Some of the heat from before returned to Hux’s skull and he hoped it was a good sign, and not just a reaction to the lewd images Ren was currently trying to get past as fast as he could.
They arrived at the night when Ren entered his quarters for the first time. Hux felt enough of Ren’s emotion to know that he found it odd, experiencing the other point of view of such a passionate affair. Hux opened himself more in the hopes he would also feel the raw attraction, the feverish way Hux yearned for him, how amazing it felt, how much Hux had wanted and needed and taken. He felt Ren’s breath as he gasped, and Hux fought down the urge to kiss him once again, momentarily lost in the recollection of their passion.
Ren moved forward, and Hux knew that these would be the memories that saved him. Hux tried to push them forward, to make them as loud as he possibly could. He needed Ren to know everything, how the feeling of Ren’s arms around him gave him the only thing close to peace he had felt in years, how he wanted nothing more than to trace every single mark and scar on Ren’s body with his fingers and his tongue. With Ren in his mind he let himself finally admit the things he wouldn’t admit before, not even to himself, that no matter how much he said he needed nothing in his life finding Ren in his bed felt like coming home. He let Ren see the guilt that ate Hux from the inside every time they couldn’t do what they were doing in that exact moment.
The feeling of warmth once again began to tentatively spread and Hux felt an immense relief before one of the final memories began to surface.
Ren watched himself leave on his mission, and Hux tried to slow the recollection down as much as possible. If anything was going to convince Ren to stay with him, it would be when he truly succumbed to his feelings. In that moment Hux opened everything, every single door he could think of that he’d kept closed. He showed Ren his absolute panic when his tracker went dark. He showed him the way he didn’t, couldn’t sleep, how he cut his palms open in worry, how he couldn’t focus on anything else until he knew Ren was safe and free of harm. Finally, he showed him the realization that he couldn’t pretend he was in control anymore, made at Ren’s bedside. Hux tried to open his heart so Ren could see it all, exactly how he felt, so entrapped by him that he was risking everything in the chance Ren might accept him.
It was that thought that finally brought them back to their current moment. Hux was exhausted, but he stayed still, waiting for Ren to react, his entire body tense in anticipation.
Why? It was the first thing Ren had said the entire ordeal, and it was spoken straight into Hux’s head. Hux was too cautiously relieved to answer right away. Ren wasn’t running. He wasn’t pulling away or grabbing his lightsaber and trying to kill him. Ren’s hands were still large and warm at the sides of his face, a comfort that Hux relished in only for a moment.
He had still kept one thing guarded, the truest test of everything they had established together. The manipulation paled in comparison to its source, its reason for being. Tucked away in his mind Hux had kept his dreams for their future hidden, and now he gently pushed them forward for Ren to open. A gift, if Ren would take it as such.
They opened around him, flooding both of their minds. The officers and soldiers who were loyal to Hux, who had followed him into hell would certainly do it again. He had the resources, he had the respect. Laid before him were his plans and the vivid images of he and Ren, conspiring together, pressed close with their words carried on whispers. Images of storming the Citadel together.
Images of Snoke, dead at their feet.
He showed Ren what he had been imagining, that night watching over him in the medical wing, of draping him in the finery of their Empire. Hux decided in that moment that Ren would look best in gold. He projected a picture of them together, Hux with his new Empire and Ren free to do as he pleased. Their rooms were large and grand and the universe was theirs.
The vision ended abruptly and Ren vaulted back with a gasp as if struck, bracing himself on the bed with the hands too soon ripped from Hux’s face. He felt the absence of Ren’s mind and touch as if he had suddenly been doused with ice water, the emptiness hollowing him out in a way he felt like he could never recover from. The look on Ren’s face was so conflicted Hux couldn’t even made out a range of emotions aside from ’all’. He saw panic, he saw fear, he saw hurt, and for once in his life he couldn’t make heads or tails of any of it. He snapped out of his trance and leaned forward, reaching out with one hand to try to touch Ren’s face, to reassure him.
“Ren-”
But Ren was up and off the bed, heading straight for the door at a pace that couldn’t be healthy for his recovering injuries. He didn’t look back, and when it slid shut behind him Hux was still frozen in place, reaching for nothing but air.
---
It took everything Hux had to come out of his quarters for his next shift on the bridge. He half expected Ren to be outside the door, lightsaber blazing, waiting to chop off his head.
What he hadn’t expected, however, was a wait. He was all too reminded of when Ren had avoided him for almost a week after his first advances, but the wait that followed then was nothing compared to what he was experiencing this time around. When he had gone into his confession Hux had assumed that by the end of that night he would either be elated or dead, but not that he would be alone, barely managing sleep around how absolutely unnerved he was.
Every time he rounded a corner or saw a shadow he expected to see Ren, if he would even see him coming at all, yet when he arrived on the bridge everything was as it usually was. It was almost surreal, to see his officers go about their business when he felt like there was a target on his back. He briefly wondered what they would do if Ren walked up and struck him down in front of everyone. Would he be that dramatic? Or would he spare Hux any dignity in exchange for the time they had shared together, and take his life in private?
Would it hurt, to be killed by a beam of light? The irony of it didn’t escape him, at least.
Alpha shift came and went with no sign of Ren anywhere. Hux went to his quarters, inspected his rooms, and checked the security cameras, but as it was before, the knight was nowhere to be found. He cursed himself for not yet replacing his tracker, too caught up in his relief that Ren was alive to consider needing the advantage only a few cycles later.
Three tense, near sleepless, nerve wracking cycles passed before Hux entered his room to find what he had always expected to be there. Ren was standing in the center of the room, robes in place but mask nowhere to be seen. Hux stopped in his tracks in the doorway, and was suddenly overcome with a feeling of finality. The silence hung heavy between them, an oppressive weight that made breathing difficult. Suddenly everything was too heavy, his coat on his shoulders, the datapad in his hands, his boots on the floor, they were all keeping him from what he recognized as a deep, feral instinct to run.
Hux had not made his way to General by running, however. He steeled himself and took a step forward, the door to his quarters sliding shut like the lid of a coffin.
“Ren.”
The Knight nodded at him. “Hux.”
The silence that stretched between them was no less oppressive, but for every moment it lasted Hux felt his panic begin to subside. If Ren wanted him dead, he would be dead already. Still, he had no interest in waiting any longer for what was to be inevitable. “I take it you’ve considered what you’ve seen.”
Ren seemed to hesitate, as if he was even in that moment conflicted, and a small spark of hope lit itself in Hux’s chest. “I have.” he responded, still incredibly formal.
Hux waited for him to continue, but Ren only shifted slightly on his feet, unsure. “And?”
Ren stared at him, and Hux allowed him to. Whatever it was Ren was trying to decide upon, Hux could feel that it was in his favor. He let Ren’s eyes do what normally only Hux would, take in every aspect of what he was seeing. The scrutiny was uncomfortable, but necessary. Finally, having found what he had been looking for and apparently making up his mind, Ren straightened and spoke with a clear and powerful voice. “Come here and I’ll show you.”
Ren stretched his hand out and all Hux could find in himself to do was stare. It was upturned, for Hux to hold, and for what felt like the first time Hux truly noticed how much larger it was than his own. He expected something to come from it, his lightsaber flying into it to strike him down, but it continued to remain empty, waiting. Hux’s eyes moved back to Ren’s face and what he saw made his knees weak. There was no anger, or malice in his expression. Instead, Ren looked like he was pleading.
It was enough to make Hux take Ren’s hand and let him walk them over to Hux’s closet, the door to which was a large, full length mirror that could slide away to reveal his clothes. Ren stood Hux in front of it, standing behind him, one step to the left so his head could rest on Hux’s shoulder. His right arm wrapped around Hux’s waist, his left coming up to gently touch his neck, thumb tracing over his pulse, eliciting a shiver from Hux that ran through his whole body. He felt his shoulders begin to relax, his heart rate slowed, and he realized that it was Ren doing that to him. He wanted to be wary, to believe that Ren was simply making him complacent before the kill, but the overwhelming warmth he was beginning to feel through his entire body slowly began to melt even his anxiety away. He was only slightly jarred when Ren spoke, deep voice ringing in his ear.
“Close your eyes.”
Against every instinct he had, Hux did. Once again he felt the warmth of Ren’s presence in the base of his skull, this time seeming to almost radiate from the hand that gently held his head. It was incredible, having Ren in his head again, and Hux left himself open as much as he could. If this was the way he was to die, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad.
The hand on his neck slowly drifted up to his face and covered his eyes, startling Hux before Ren began whispering soothing things in his ear, “You’ll be fine”, “I’ve got you”, and then into his head, Trust me and I’m not going to hurt you. It was the last of them that made Hux gasp. If he had been a different man he imagined he could have cried from the relief, knowing for certain then that Ren was not there to be his executioner. Ren seemed to sense his relief and pressed further, so heavily in his head that Hux would have swore he was also in his mouth, his ears, his eyes. The sensation was so close to overwhelming that he leaned back and sank against Ren’s broad chest, supported by the arm around his waist.
Too soon Ren removed his hand from Hux’s eyes, but he still kept them shut tight, already missing their presence. He was so content he imagined he could stay there for hours, leaning against Ren’s form, his warmth circulating through his body and head with such fervor it was comparable to a high. He felt Ren move to loosen the arm around his waist, and Hux was about to protest when the Knight spoke once again in his ear.
“Open your eyes.”
Hux did.
They were not in his quarters.
The mirror they were standing before was no longer a simple panel on a sliding door. It was now ornate, decorated, and golden, freestanding against the wall of a room Hux did not recognize. In the reflection and around him he could see that they were in a lavish bedroom, decorated in deep reds and bright golds. Hux took in everything he was seeing, the walls decorated with a scrolling pattern of golden vines and leaves on a dark red background, the floors marble and strong underneath his feet. He swore he could feel its smooth texture when he shifted his foot, could smell something floral in the air drifting from the large open floor-to-ceiling windows to his right. They led to a balcony with spires as grand as the rest of the room, the light of morning filtering in past the plush drawn golden curtains. They were on a planet and it was clearly morning, the bed behind them rumpled and unmade.
Hux turned his attention to the mirror once again and stood, stunned at his own reflection. He was seemingly in the same spot he had been standing when he closed his eyes, but nothing else about the scene was the same. His usual black attire was replaced with one of white, a clean-lined formal uniform that held the decoration of his rank, but no, the medals and bars he was gazing at far exceeded his own rank. They were displayed on his left and an asymmetrical cape hung off his right shoulder, fastened with a chain and a golden broach of the First Order’s sigyl. Behind him Ren had also changed his garb, although he still wore all black. Instead of his usual flowing robes he wore a fitted jacket, clearly made for more practical movement, but with a cape matching Hux’s over his left shoulder. It was black, with the gold First Order broach in the same spot.
More than anything though, more than the room or his clothes or Ren, Hux noticed the thin band of gold circling his head.
What is this, he thought, scared to open his mouth lest the illusion break. Ren held him tighter, staring at their reflection in the mirror, eyes trained on Hux’s, gauging his reaction. He was taking in nothing of their surroundings, and Hux assumed it was because he had come up with them on their own.
It’s not an illusion. Hux heard in his head, and for a moment he found himself confused. Ren looked nervous then, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth as he continued to gaze upon Hux with careful scrutiny. It’s a vision.
It took a moment for the reality of what Ren had said to sink in, but when it did Hux felt like the breath had been knocked clear out of his lungs. He felt Ren’s arms around him tighten in support, but he was in no danger of falling, too filled by the vision around him to even consider letting go.
Ren wasn’t just showing them an idea, he was showing them their future. This was Ren’s way of telling him what he had chosen, that he was picking Hux over Snoke, over everything. More than that, he was showing him that it was the right choice. Hux had never considered himself a man of doubt, but the knowledge that this was the truth, that this morning on some yet-decided planet was coming was almost too much. His Empire was front of him, and Ren, the Knight, his knight, was behind. A thousand different emotions swelled inside of him on top of Ren’s own, so much so that he felt he may burst at the seams before he could even claim his promised throne.
Hux spun around in Ren’s arms, his hands flying to either side of Ren’s face to pull him into an impassioned kiss. Ren returned it immediately, the arm that hadn’t been around his waist flying to his hair. Hux could feel the warmth of the vision dissipate around them but he couldn’t bring himself to care. It would be waiting for him, in the future, but for now all that mattered was the man pressed against him and the warmth he felt from his head to his toes.
Ren was his. In every unexpected way, he was Ren’s. Together, they were going to take over the universe.
They could do this.
