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Normally Lex would find having Slade in his office shirtless to be something worth getting at least a little excited over, but that’s not the case today. With the lights dimmed and his bodyguard turned boyfriend sitting on the edge of his desk, Lex gave a heavy sigh as he popped the lid of a freshly bought bottle of aloe vera open. Shaking his head as he poured a dollop of the nearly clear gel into his hand, Lex heard a tongue click of indignation come from the man sitting before him.
“What now?” Despite what Slade thinks he heard, there wasn’t any amusement in Lex’s voice as he asked that. Lex genuinely had no idea why Slade would be in a mood with him, not when he’s currently doing the bodyguard a favour.
“Don’t say it.” Slade doesn’t turn back to look at Lex as he speaks. The most movement Slade shows is a very slight head turn, one that is stopped before he can even see Lex and is punctuated with a low hiss of pain.
“Don’t move if you don’t have to. And for the record, I wasn’t going to say anything.”
“Oh you are such a bad ACK-!” Flinching in pain as Lex slowly starts applying the gel to his very burnt shoulder, Slade lets out another hiss and a slew of swears before he finishes his thought “-Fuck! Liar! God damn it!”
“Hey, it’s your own fault it hurts. I told you to wear sunscreen. You’re pale as hell, Slade. You should’ve listened to me”
There it is. That ‘I told you so, why didn’t you listen to me?’. He knew that Lex was thinking it the whole time and it was the last thing Slade wanted to hear when he was burned so badly.
Ripping his shoulder from Lex’s touch, Slade bends himself forward before he whips his head to the side, ignoring the sharp sting of his skin and the pulsating ache that radiates down his side as he turns. With the best glare he can muster through his headache, Slade turns his attention to Lex who’s just standing there mildly bewildered. The sudden movement and the, no pun intended, heated look of Slade’s face has him a little stunned.
“What? Did it hurt that much? I can give you some painkillers if it’s that bad.”
“I don’t wanna hear your nagging!”
Sneering at the line, Lex puts a hand on his hip as he awaits an explanation, momentarily forgetting the aloe still on his palm. “Oh, I’m nagging you now?”
Rolling his eye, Slade scoffs as he jumps off the desk he was sitting on, once again wincing at the pain that spreads across his whole back and shoulders. His chest and most of his face was fine, but his back and his shoulders are unfortunately a painful looking red. It’s so bad that Lex scolded him the second he walked through the door as he returned home last night. The burn was so severe that just a few hours after exposure Lex could tell that Slade was probably going to blister. And now here they are… Slade in immense pain from a heinous sunburn and Lex on a high horse, that’s what Slade thinks anyway.
“I just don’t wanna hear it, Lex! I know I should’ve listened to you and worn more sunscreen! I get it! But you know, it’s your fault that this happened at all!”
“Oh how in the hell is this my fault?!” Looking around in bewilderment, Lex can’t believe that Slade’s actually trying to blame HIM for this.
“You’re the one that made me and my whole security team go on that stupid fucking ‘Team Bonding and Trust Building’ retreat! That was a massive fucking waste of my time all because some whiny little bitches couldn’t take constructive criticism!”
“You know I had to send you and your team on that! HR was on my ass about it!” Pinching the bridge of his nose, Lex tries to collect his thoughts remembering just what exactly spawned that whole situation.
“You’re the CEO! You have the final say-so, Lex!”
“Slade…You’ve had 6 complaints about you filed with our HR head because of your ‘aggressive nature’ and ‘vulgar language’. ”
“You know that’s all bullshit! It’s that little fucking punk bitch Kevin! He’s not even on my team! He’s in public relations! He shouldn’t be allowed to complain about me! If he keeps it up imma give him something to complain about!” Slade gestures with his hands as he speaks, throwing a middle finger in what he thinks would be the direction of Kevin’s office below them.
“I know you don’t like Kevin. I genuinely have no idea what you two have against each other but that’s not the point…What is the point is that you can’t speak to people or threaten them however you want. Especially not where people who you aren’t on good terms with can hear you! I had to send you and your team there! HR was on my back and that’s a good cover for ‘Oh, well you see Mr.Wilson and his team recently did some excellent team building exercises to limit any animosity.’ It’s just to cover our asses legally!”
Slade waves his hand at Lex dismissively, regretting the action when he feels another pang of pain run through his back when he moves. Sure, Lex wanted to berate Slade for his reckless behavior about the sunblock and him not listening…But he hates seeing Slade in pain. They both know Lex was right and that Slade was in the wrong about this, there really isn’t any need to rub Slade’s nose in it…Especially since it’s one of the only places on his body that isn’t burnt beyond belief.
“Slade…” Lex starts, his voice laced with a mild concern as he watches Slade with a doleful look. “We don’t need to fight over this, please. Just sit back down.”
Slade wants to stay mad. He wants the ability to yell at someone, be able to be mad at someone for this, but there’s nobody but himself to be mad at. He knows he should’ve listened. He knows that it’s not Lex’s fault that little bitch Kevin ran to tattle to HR about him and he knows that the team building retreat really was just a good cover for them…But he’s still mad about it. Scrunching his face in annoyance, ignoring the slight pang he feels when his brow furrows, Slade bites his inner lip before he opens his eye and looks back at Lex cautiously. Looking for any animosity or anger though he finds none, not a sliver or minutiae of disdain graces Lex’s face.
“Fine, fine. I’ll sit back down just stop giving me those puppy dog eyes.” Turning his back to Lex only briefly, Slade presses his palms to the desk and lifts himself back onto the hard surface to sit, giving Lex better access to the burned skin.
For a while they sit in silence with Lex gingerly spreading the aloe over Slade’s shoulders before moving down to coat his back in the gel. The small sounds of Slade’s discomfort are the only sounds that fill the air while the almost overwhelming scent of aloe tickles Lex’s nose. The tension is palpable, it’s so thick that neither man really knows how to soften the rigid air that’s formed between them in this moment.
“So…Why exactly does Kevin hate you?”
“Probably cause I called him a little pussy when he first started.”
…
“Are-Are you serious?”
“Oh yeah, I totally called him a little pussy.”
“SLADE!”
“What?! He is one! Don’t even deny it!”
“So you two have been going back and forth for months because you called him a pussy and he’s just decided he hates you for it?”
“See? Pussy behavior.”
Lex’s face drops into an unamused expression, his left eye twitching in annoyance as he looks down at Slade’s burnt shoulders. He’s been having to deal with all those annoying HR meetings and hearing Kevin’s complaints…all because Slade called him a pussy months ago.
Lex’s eyes slowly scan over to the middle of Slade’s back, the bright red flesh now covered in aloe but still incredibly sensitive and tender and he decides in that moment, Slade kinda deserves this, if nothing else to make up for all the nonsense he’s had to deal with regarding Kevin…all because Slade was an asshole once. He’ll deal with Kevin later, but right now? It’s time to give Slade just a little bit of punishment…
“Hey Slade?”
“Yeah?”
-WHACK-
“YOU MOTHER FUCKER!” Slade’s nails dig into the desk as he lets out a mix of curses, his body instinctively lurching forward to separate himself from Lex’s hand that’s still pressed into the small of his back roughly.
“I told you so.”
“Oh you’re gonna get it for that Luthor…That wasn’t right and you know it!”
“You’ve gotta be able to move to hurt me, Wilson. And I think you’ll be outta commission for a few more days…Isn’t that right?”
Lex’s left hand claps down loudly on Slade’s shoulder to emphasize the question, the action only met with another scream and a symphony of damnation.
Feigning concern, Lex pulls his hand away while giving a fake gasp.
“Oh no, Slade~I’m so sorry! That didn’t hurt too much, did it?” The taunting nature of the delivery and the smug look on Lex’s face says it all and Slade can only grumble bitterly. He knows when he’s beat… It doesn’t happen often but right now he’s at Lex’s mercy.
“You’re in for it when this burn heals.”
“Sure, sure. Whatever you say, Wilson. Whatever you say…” Lex trails off at the end while looking back to his laptop.
“Say Slade, how would you feel about me giving you an…extracurricular off the books assignment”
“Oh fuck you! I’m not doing you any favors, Luthor! You’re in the doghouse right now!”
“Oh really? You’re really not gonna help me out with this?”
“You’re on your own! Find another attack dog.” Slade spits out, venom dripping from his voice as he turns his head to glare back at Lex.
“Even if it involves your favorite coworker, Kevin…?”
Eye widening just a little in excitement, the corner of Slade’s mouth pulls upward in a tiny lopsided grin as he realizes what Lex might be gifting him. Even if he’s mad he’s never been good at saying no to Lex, especially not when he’s dangling a treat in front of him like he is now.
“What did you have in mind?”
