Chapter Text
Hizashi loved his birthday. There were colorful decorations everywhere around town for Tanabata, and it always kinda felt like the whole country was celebrating with him. Still, even as people walked past the window of the izakaya, ignoring Hizashi and heading further into town for the festival, he was perfectly content not being part of the crowd. Anyone could go to the Tanabata festival, but only Hizashi got to spend the evening sharing a beer with his best friend.
It was normally a challenge to get Aizawa to come out for a drink; so it had to be some kind of proof of Tanabata Birthday magic that July 7th was one of the few days a year where Aizawa always agreed to meet up. If Hizashi’s Tanabata wishes were also birthday wishes, then that had to double the chance of them coming true, right?
Except…
There was one wish that no amount of tanzaku seemed capable of granting, no matter how eloquently Hizashi had written it out on those delicate slips of paper over the years. Eight years of wishing that Aizawa would like him back had thus far not managed to inspire even a flicker of interest from his dark-and-broody friend.
That was cool, though. All good. Hizashi simply did what he always did and made the best of the hand he was dealt. He had Aizawa as his best friend, even if their busy schedules meant that they couldn’t see each other as much as they used to. So instead of getting bogged down by thinking about what he couldn’t have, Hizashi spent his time seeking out to the things he could have:
Loud music to dance to.
Villains to fight.
Lots of sex.
“Dude, I’m telling you,” Hizashi said, leaning across the small table and almost sloshing his beer into Aizawa’s lap, “This guy was so eager to fuck me that we barely made it to his car before his pants were halfway down and he was workin’ on my belt. Like, I appreciate your enthusiasm, buddy, and yes, I am incredibly hot; but can you keep your dick in your pants for an extra thirty seconds please?”
It had been three weeks since that particular hookup, and Hizashi was still some mix of amused and irritated by the guy’s impatience. At least once they’d gotten down to business, he’d known what he was doing better than Hizashi’s previous hookup. That one had been a hot mess.
Aizawa stared down into his mug as Hizashi talked, taking the occasional sip of his beer and grunting at vaguely appropriate moments during the story. Hizashi was used to the way Aizawa projected perpetual disinterest, even when he was giving something his full attention; but something about his mood seemed more sour than usual tonight.
When Hizashi finished telling Aizawa about the hot mess hookup — which was a hilarious story that frankly deserved at least a smirk — his friend thumped his mug down on the table and slumped down in his seat.
“Maybe you wouldn’t have so many unsatisfying sexual encounters if you didn’t sleep with everyone who looks at you for more than ten seconds.”
Hizashi gaped at him. Where the fuck had that come from?
Putting on his best ‘I am deeply offended’ voice, Hizashi tipped his chin up and huffed, “First of all, how dare you try and slut-shame me. I am a proud slut, thank-you-very-much! Just cuz you’re not interested in the carnal pleasures of life doesn’t mean the rest of us should deprive ourselves. I’m 23 and a busy man! Who has time for a relationship?” Hizashi didn’t bother mentioning that he was so hopelessly hung up on his emotionally unavailable friend that the idea of dating anyone else tore him up inside. “And second of all, I do have standards.”
Aizawa’s face only grew darker as his thumb traced through the condensation trickling down his glass. “Yeah, big tits or a big cock.”
Hizashi’s surprise from earlier started to give way to concern. “What’s wrong with you tonight, man? This isn’t like you. That’s only your second beer. Or is it your third? Either way, you shouldn’t be asshole-drunk.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, Aizawa glowered at him. “Nothing’s wrong with me.”
“Yeah, the way you’re pouting looks exactly like someone with nothing wrong,” Hizashi scoffed.
With a sigh, Aizawa deflated a little. “I’m— just not in the mood to hear about your hookups tonight, that’s all.”
“What, cuz suddenly you feel like you’re missing out on something?” Hizashi quipped.
Aizawa didn’t say anything; but the way his pout deepened to a scowl and his face flushed red before he ducked his head to hide behind his curtain of hair spoke volumes.
Wait. What the fuck?
Did Aizawa want to get laid?
Hizashi raised an eyebrow at that. He’d been bummed over the years by the fact that Aizawa had never shown any interest in him; but Aizawa never showed any interest in anyone. He had admitted, once, that he was gay. It had taken Kayama needling him for the better part of an hour on the subject, and he’d finally told them just to shut her up; but that was the last it had ever been mentioned. Hizashi was secretly convinced his best friend was a virgin; and even if he wasn’t, it was a lie Hizashi was content to keep believing to spare himself the jealous rage he’d get lost in otherwise.
But… if Aizawa was feeling horny tonight...
No, that was a Bad Idea. The reason Hizashi was so good at not catching feelings with his hookups was because he’d already caught them elsewhere. Crossing that line with Aizawa would fuck with the tenuous balance Hizashi had managed to hold on to over the years.
If Aizawa wanted to get laid, it should be with someone else. It might tear Hizashi up inside, but he wanted his best friend to enjoy the pleasures of life, rather than deprive himself like he usually did.
“If you want to find someone, you should go do it.” The words were sour on his tongue, but he knew it was the right thing to say. With one caveat. “Tomorrow, though, when it’s not my birthday! You’re not allowed to blow me off tonight, no matter how hot the guy is,” he joked, hoping that Aizawa wouldn’t recognize the emotions underneath.
Of course, because Aizawa could never simply appreciate the sacrifices Hizashi made for him, he just sighed and frowned. “I don’t think it’ll work like that for me,” he said. “Nobody would be… interested.”
Oh, the sweet smell of insecurity. Hizashi’s reflex to sweet-talk his way right into those well-fitted pants was strong; but this was Aizawa.
He wasn’t gonna play games like that with Aizawa.
Still, with liquid courage in his veins, Hizashi couldn’t help dancing closer to the danger zone by telling him the truth. “Uhhh, have you seen yourself? I mean, after a shower, not after three solid days of patrolling and sleeping in alleys. You’re hot, man.”
“It’s not about that, it’s— never mind.”
Ok, now Hizashi was curious. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Come oonnnn, you can tell me! What are best friends for!”
“It’s… personal.”
Hizashi snorted. “What, do you have a weird growth on your dick or somethin’?”
Aizawa choked on his sip of beer.
Suddenly, the joke didn’t seem so funny anymore. “Wait, do you!? I mean, you should prolly see a doctor or something to—”
“No! For fuck’s sake, my dick is fine, it’s just—”
Hizashi waited, holding his breath. Aizawa slugged back the rest of his beer.
Finally, Hizashi couldn’t take the silence anymore. “It’s just what?”
“...Small.”
Hizashi blinked. “Oh, is that all? I mean, I dunno how many dicks you’ve got personal experience with, but almost nobody in the real world is out there packing a porn-star sized package, so—”
“Six centimeters.”
Hizashi froze. He did some mental math. He looked down at his thumb, which was actually a little longer than that, but not much, before stammering out, “That’s not that small, dude. Lotsa guys are more grow-ers than show-ers, if ya know what I me—”
“Hard, Yamada. It’s six centimeters when I’m hard.”
Oh.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. I don’t need any personal experience with anyone else to know where I stand. I’m not interested in signing up for pointless attempts at intimacy just to have someone be… disappointed.”
An overwhelming rush of indignant protectiveness swept over Hizashi on behalf of his friend against hypothetical shallow rejections. “Why would they be disappointed?”
Aizawa leveled a cold stare at him. “Judging by the look on your face when I told you, I don’t think I need to answer that.”
Shit.
“Hey! I was just surprised, that's all!”
“Don’t try and bullshit me, Yamada,” Aizawa huffed.
“I’m not bullshitting! I’m serious! There’s way more to sex than dick size, why the hell would I be disappointed just cuz someone was packing something smaller than usual?” With every alarm bell in his head screaming that this was a Very Bad Idea, Hizashi kept talking. “We should have sex, I’ll show you how good it’d be for both of us!”
Aizawa’s jaw dropped. “What the fuck? Are you drunk?”
A half-manic energy hummed under Hizashi’s skin. “Barely buzzed, and I’m serious.”
“I’m not some hookup, Yamada; and I don’t need a pity fuck.”
“‘Course not! You’re my friend! My best friend! I would simply be granting you an additional benefit of having the most awesome best friend in the whole world!”
Hizashi knew it was stupid. If they did this, he was only gonna dig himself deeper into the pit of feelings he was in; but how the hell was he supposed to pass up an opportunity like this? Because as shitty as it was, Hizashi knew Aizawa was right; lots of assholes would make a guy feel like shit and act like having a cock that small meant he couldn’t satisfy a partner. Even if Aizawa didn’t ever feel anything for him, at least this way, Hizashi would be the first person to touch him, to make him feel good. No matter what happened afterwards, Hizashi would be able to hold on to that, to know he had something special that nobody else would.
And maybe, if Hizashi did a good enough job, Aizawa might catch feelings…
Aizawa’s hair fell forward to cover his face as he looked down into his empty mug of beer.
“Come back to my place,” Hizashi said, “We don’t gotta do anything, we can just hang out.”
Slowly, Aizawa nodded, standing from his seat and shuffling towards the door.
It took them half an hour to get to Hizashi’s place, and his buzz was wearing off by the time he closed the apartment door behind them; but hell if he was gonna second-guess himself now.
Hizashi toed his shoes off, but Aizawa was hunched in on himself as he stood in the genkan like he’d forgotten what to do next.
“Take your shoes off, heathen,” Hizashi teased. He flicked a stray lock of Aizawa’s hair — it was soft, he’d showered before meeting up with Hizashi at the izakaya — and Aizawa jolted at the touch. “Woah, easy man, I’m not gonna bite you.”
Aizawa was quiet as they made their way to the couch, which wasn’t unusual, since Aizawa was quiet most of the time; but right now it felt like there was stuff that Aizawa wasn’t saying, which was unusual. Hizashi did his part to fill the silence with chatter until Aizawa was ready to speak.
It took about three minutes.
“This is a bad idea,” Aizawa said, shifting away from Hizashi on the sofa. “I was just drunk and irritated. Not everyone is as obsessed with sex as you are.”
Hizashi frowned at him. “Hey! If you don’t wanna do anything, that’s fine; but I’m not obsessed with sex!”
“Sure seems like it,” Aizawa huffed, sinking deeper into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest and looking away from Hizashi.
Sighing, Hizashi leaned forward, just a bit. “I like sex. It’s fun. It feels good. And there’s lots of ways to do it, to keep things interesting,” he said. Then it was his turn to glance away for a second before he leaned in to Aizawa’s line of sight, making sure he could see that Hizashi was serious when he said this next bit. “Anyone who turns you down just cuz of what you’ve got in your pants is an idiot.”
“Easy for you to say,” Aizawa said, his face flushing, “I’m sure you’ve never gotten any complaints.”
Hizashi’s brain momentarily short-circuited as he realized the implication that, at some point during all their years in high school, while Hizashi was trying so hard to not look at Aizawa in the locker rooms lest he pop a boner, Aizawa must have checked his dick out.
And Aizawa was impressed.
Granted, his baseline for comparison apparently wasn’t much, but Hizashi wanted to preen anyway.
That wasn’t the point right now, though. No, this was about Aizawa’s dick, not Hizashi’s.
“Have you ever gotten any complaints?” Hizashi asked.
“No, but that’s a technicality since I’ve never given anyone the chance to complain.”
“You’ve really never even tried? I mean, I know that you know there’s more to sex than topping; you’ve been around me and Kayama way too long to be that naive. And if you really wanna top, they make toys and stuff that you can use—”
“It’s not— I know that! But if I was interested in someone who likes to bottom, and I’ve got nothing to offer them that a sex shop can’t offer, then what’s the point?”
Hizashi stared at Aizawa, aghast. “What’s the point!? Did you seriously just imply that a dildo is a better lover than you would be?” He took a breath and realized that he needed to mellow out and cut some of the tension that had Aizawa sitting rigidly at the edge of the couch cushion. “Come on, man, give yourself at least a little bit of credit,” Hizashi said, waggling his eyebrows in the ridiculous way that almost always made Aizawa laugh— well, as much as Aizawa ever laughs.
Aizawa didn’t laugh.
Sitting up tall, Hizashi paused and really looked at his friend. Aizawa didn’t get embarrassed by much. He approached things rationally, or so he claimed. So since when did he care if other people would judge him, much less for something as trivial as the size of his dick?
But something about this was really bothering Aizawa.
Well. Hizashi was about to prove that whatever Aizawa had was more than good enough. He had wanted Aizawa for so long that there was zero chance that Aizawa would see anything like disappointment on his face; as long as he could convince Aizawa to trust him with this.
“Show me.”
An expression that Hizashi couldn’t quite catch flashed briefly across Aizawa’s face before his usual disgruntled frown settled in place. “Fine. But if you laugh, I swear, I’ll—”
“Oi! What kind of asshole do you think I am?” Hizashi was many kinds of asshole, actually, and Aizawa knew it. But none of those kinds of asshole were the ‘laugh at my best friend about something I know is bothering him’ kind.
Aizawa huffed and pouted… and unbuckled his belt. Hizashi caught himself swaying forward, trying to get a better look even though Aizawa hadn’t even gotten his zipper down yet.
He didn’t say a damn word about how badly Aizawa’s hands were shaking.
It took Aizawa a few tries to pop his button and get the fly down, but once the front of his jeans was spread open, he paused, thumbs hooked under the elastic at the top of his black boxer briefs. Hizashi hunched forward, in part because he wanted to see, and part because he was already half-hard in his pants and he didn’t want Aizawa to notice and maybe feel more awkward.
Aizawa didn’t move, though. Hizashi tore his eyes away from his friend’s crotch to look at his face— But Aizawa was staring down at himself, exactly where Hizashi’s eyes had just been locked.
Hizashi frowned. “If you really don’t wanna, then don’t, man. It’s fine—”
“I want to.” Aizawa said. “I just— nobody else has seen me since I was a little kid who needed help taking a bath.” Aizawa closed his eyes and blew out a slow breath, then pushed the band of his underwear down, holding it taut by his thigh. Hizashi’s eyes immediately darted down to look…
It was a cock.
It was Aizawa’s cock.
Well, it looked more like the head of a cock, half buried in a neatly trimmed nest of dark pubic hair; but after a beat, Hizashi could see a centimeter or two of shaft beneath it. It was about as thick around as any average dick; but now Aizawa’s ‘six centimeters hard’ comment made sense.
Hizashi’s hand drifted towards it, his fingers reaching out. He wanted to touch, wanted to see him get hard, wanted to make Aizawa feel good. He wanted to make this memory into a good one for him. For both of them.
“Can I?” Hizashi asked, his voice coming out breathier than he intended.
“If you want to,” Aizawa said, “But don’t be disappointed when it doesn’t get much bigger.”
There was probably something Hizashi should say to that, but he was too busy scooting closer to Aizawa, fingers already on his hip and sliding inwards, nails scratching gently through coarse hair.
Aizawa shivered at the touch.
When Hizashi dragged a fingertip against soft, velvety skin, Aizawa sucked in a sharp, shaky breath.
“Shit,” he gasped, and Hizashi saw his fingers clench as he gripped his underwear. Licking his lips, Hizashi circled the pad of his finger slowly around, wanting nothing more than to drop to his knees in front of Aizawa and taste him…
But this was Shouta’s first time, and it might be the only chance Hizashi got at this, so he didn’t want to rush it. He focused on easy touches, holding his breath as he felt the first telltale pulse of pressure beneath his fingertips.
“That’s it,” Hizashi whispered, “Show me. I’ve got you.” Hizashi felt the surge against his fingers, stronger this time as Shouta’s cock twitched, firming up under his touch. He started squeezing a little tighter, thumb and fingertips moving in a careful massaging motion, and Shouta made a quiet, choked-off noise.
Emboldened, Hizashi reached lower, slipping his hand beneath the fabric of Shouta’s underwear to cup his balls. Shouta jerked and sucked in a sharp breath.
“Those are normal sized,” he snapped, body tensing.
“I know,” Hizashi said, not moving his hand away, gently rubbing his thumb against the delicate skin. “Do you not like having them touched?”
“I— It’s fine. I don’t usually bother, but it’s… fine.”
“Ok.” Hizashi rolled them in his palm for another moment before sliding his hand back up, his hand brushing against Shouta’s wrist where he was still holding the elastic down.
Hizashi’s cock was fully hard by now, pinned uncomfortably in his pants; but he did his best to ignore it, because there were much more important things to attend to. Like the fact that Shouta was fully hard. Hizashi stared, mouth watering.
He was perfect.
Dragging his fingers around the plump, ruddy head, Hizashi’s eyes flicked up to watch Shouta’s face as he gripped more firmly, his thumb stroking along the frenulum. He wasn’t disappointed as Shouta’s brow furrowed up with pleasure, his jaw dropping in a quiet gasp.
Hizashi wanted to lean in and kiss the corner of his mouth; but that was a line he didn’t dare cross. As far as he knew, Shouta had never kissed anyone, and Hizashi wasn’t about to just steal his first kiss with no warning.
And…
He needed to be able to be normal with Shouta after this. If he kissed him, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to come back from that.
“Gorgeous,” Hizashi said, making himself focus on Shouta’s cock in his palm as he wrapped his hand around it and squeezed.
“Sh— ah, shaddup,” Shouta stammered.
“Does that mean you want me to find something else to do with my mouth instead?” Hizashi teased, putting on his best bedroom voice. “I bet this would fit perfectly.”
“Fuck, yes, please,” Shouta hissed, his hips shifting as Hizashi moved his hand. As reluctant as he was to let go of Shouta’s cock, Hizashi didn’t need to be asked twice. Pausing just long enough to adjust his own aching dick in his pants, Hizashi grabbed a throw pillow and settled himself on the floor between Shouta’s knees.
He knew that he shouldn’t look up at Shouta’s face right now; he risked giving away far too much if Shouta saw how badly he wanted this; but fuck, Hizashi wanted to memorize every minute of it.
So as he leaned forward, drawing the tip of his tongue slowly up from the base to the tip, he glanced up in time to see Shouta staring, wide-eyed, down at him.
Something in his chest clenched, and the safest thing to do was gag himself before something incriminating came out of his mouth.
How fortunate for him that Shouta’s cock really did fit perfectly.
Fuck, it was just long enough to reach the back of his tongue, but not so much that it triggered his gag reflex, and thick enough that his lips still had to stretch around it. He could move his tongue enough to trace the vein along the underside, and Shouta’s legs pressed open wider, trying to draw Hizashi in impossibly closer.
“Oh shit, fuck, that’s—” Shouta gasped above him.
Hizashi only hummed, drawing a groan out of Shouta, before hollowing his cheeks and working his tongue in the kind of rhythmic movements that always went over well. It didn’t take long before Hizashi could feel Shouta’s thighs twitching as he fought back the urge to thrust.
“Shit, hah, Hiza— hnnn, fuck, I— I’m close—” Shouta’s hand reached for Hizashi’s shoulder, his head — touching, brushing against him, not grabbing; only desperate jerky moves as he tried to hold back. Hizashi could feel the way his cock was twitching in his mouth, getting the slightest bit bigger as his orgasm built up.
There was no way he was pulling his mouth off Shouta’s cock, so he did the only thing he could think of to communicate that Shouta could come like this; that Hizashi wanted him to. He slid his hand over to Shouta’s thigh and squeezed.
This was Shouta’s first blowjob, so it made sense for him to reach the edge quickly; but for a moment, Hizashi let himself imagine what it would be like if they did this regularly. If Shouta got to the point where Hizashi could suck him for ages, never needing to back away for breath, his nose pressed right into his pubes, knowing he had all of him…
“Ahhh, gods, haaah—” Shouta went rigid, muscles tensing up beneath Hizashi’s hands as hot come pulsed into his mouth. He swallowed it down as more followed, until Hizashi was licking the last of it gently from the slit. He only stopped moving his tongue when Shouta hissed with oversensitivity.
Even as he stilled, he stayed in place. He closed his eyes and let himself breathe in the moment before he would inevitably have to relinquish Shouta’s perfect little cock. As it softened, Hizashi sighed and finally sat back on his heels. He winced as his own dick began protesting that it desperately needed some attention. Pressing the heel of his hand against himself, he groaned at the contact and rested his forehead against Shouta’s thigh.
He took a shaky breath as he palmed himself, barely daring to look up at Shouta, worried about what he might see in his friend’s face.
Or what he might not see.
“I, uh, really gotta take care of this,” Hizashi said, glancing up quickly. “I can stay here, or I can go to my room really quick, it’s not gonna take long—”
The hazy, blissed out expression on Shouta’s face cleared in an instant as he blinked down at Hizashi. “You’re hard?”
“Uuhhh, yeah? I really like giving head, not sure how that’s a newsflash to you,” Hizashi said with a breathy laugh to try and hide his nerves. “So, should I stay here or go elsewhere?”
His pulse thrummed in his ears for a few beats before Shouta finally responded. “Come up here,” he said, indicating the couch next to him. Hizashi hissed with relief as he stood and unfastened his jeans as fast as he could, releasing his aching cock and shoving his pants and underwear down around his thighs before sitting down, stroking himself.
He glanced over at Shouta. Shouta was staring at him. At his hand on his cock.
“See something you like?” Hizashi teased, hoping the answer was yes.
“Fuck, you’re hot,” Shouta whispered, his hand reaching out towards Hizashi’s cock.
“Even hotter when you touch it,” Hizashi invited, moving his own hand away. “No pressure, I can handle it myself, but— oh, ffffuck,” Hizashi groaned as Shouta grabbed hold and started stroking him. His movements were a little awkward and unpracticed, but—
“It’s so big,” Shouta murmured under his breath, and oh fuck, suddenly Hizashi was right on the edge; fuck, this was gonna be embarassing if he didn’t get himself together.
“Ain't about the size, but I do know how to use it,” Hizashi said, barely managing to keep his voice steady as the heat spiraled and pooled inside him. Shouta kept staring as his hand stroked Hizashi, not quite enough to tip him over the edge. Hizashi took a breath, calming himself as best he could, not wanting this to be over yet.
Shouta opened his mouth, looking at Hizashi as if he was about to ask a question, but then dropped his gaze back down to his dick and his hand on it. His movement slowed to a stop, and a deep noise punched out of Hizashi, his fingers clenching in the cushion beneath him.
“Tell me if I’m doing it wrong,” Shouta said, and before Hizashi’s horny brain could process what that meant, Shouta was leaning over and sucking the head of Hizashi’s cock into his mouth.
“Haaah, oh gods, sssshhhh—” Hizashi stammered, his fingers threading through Shouta’s hair. With shaking hands, he gathered the loose strands that fell around Shouta’s face, knowing from experience that they would get in his way and be annoying, holding them helpfully up at the back of his head.
If that gave him a better view of Shouta’s lips wrapped around his cock, well, that was simply an added bonus.
“Take it easy,” he said as Shouta tried to take more of his length into his mouth. “Keep your hand on the bottom part and only take what’s comfortable.” Shouta hummed and eased up a little. His tongue lapped against the frenulum, and Hizashi hissed, tightening his grip on Shouta’s hair but not letting himself pull or tug.
“Feels good just like that,” Hizashi groaned. “Careful of your teeth,” he added as they grazed against his skin harder than he liked. “A little is fine, though.” He felt Shouta relax his jaw and he restrained himself from bucking his hips up further into that perfect heat.
Fuck, it was good. It had no right being that good, not when Shouta was clearly fumbling his way through figuring out what he was doing; but in the back of his mind, Hizashi knew that was part of what was making it so good. His was the first (only) cock Shouta has sucked; he could teach him how to do a good job, show Shouta how he liked it, leave a mark on him that would always be there.
And part of it was simply that it was Shouta. Hizashi had fantasized about this more times than he’d ever admit, including more than a few instances when he’d had some dark-haired hookup on their knees in front of him.
“Gods, Shou, I’m getting close,” Hizashi groaned, not wanting it to be over but knowing he couldn’t hold on much longer. It was a miracle he’d managed this long. He pulled his shirt up and out of the way. “You can back up and jerk me off, it won’t take much.” Shouta moaned a noise that sounded like a complaint, and Hizashi’s hips twitched. “Ahh, shit. If you want a mouthful of my jizz, I’m not gonna stop you. But fair warning, it’s always more than you think it’ll be, and you’ll definitely make a mess of yourself.”
Shouta sealed his lips around Hizashi’s shaft and sucked, tongue swiping in desperate movements wherever it could reach while his hand stroked Hizashi hard and fast.
Hizashi valiantly held out for all of three more seconds before his orgasm ripped through him and he jerked in Shouta’s grasp. Moments later, the wet heat was gone as he heard Shouta coughing and sputtering. Hizashi’s hand immediately darted out to wrap around Shouta’s where it still gripped his cock, coaxing him to finish stroking Hizashi through the aftershocks, a weak dribble of come rolling down over their knuckles.
With a contented sigh, the tension drained out of Hizashi’s muscles.
“Shit,” Shouta muttered, then coughed again. Hizashi smirked, something primal and possessive in him thrilled to see his come dripping down Shouta’s chin and onto his shirt.
“I did warn you,” Hizashi drawled.
“Fuck off,” Shouta grumped, but there was no heat in it. He looked down at his shirt and sighed, tugging it carefully off, probably planning to wash the worst of the mess off before he left.
Hizashi expected Shouta to get up and go do that; but instead, he put the shirt aside and hovered uncertainly near Hizashi. Hizashi sighed and tugged his own shirt off, gingerly wiping the last of the mess off Shouta’s chin and then off himself. He didn’t bother tugging his pants back up, letting his softening cock lay lax against his hip as he took in the debauched sight in front of him.
Shouta huffed a breath through his nose and pressed his palm to his crotch. He shifted on the couch, adjusting himself, which dragged Hizashi’s eyes down… to where a small, but noticeable bulge was pressing out Shouta’s underwear.
“Hello there. If I’d have known you were insatiable, we could have done something different,” Hizashi said, licking his lips. He was too tired and flooded with endorphins for anything too energetic, but… “How do you normally get yourself off?”
A flush spread up Shouta’s cheeks. “What?”
“What feels best? Do you like fucking your hand? Ever use a dildo? A vibrator?”
The flush grew deeper, spreading until Shouta’s whole face was red. “Mostly I just use my hand, or…”
Hizashi arched an eyebrow. “Or what?”
“It sounds stupid.”
“I promise I won’t laugh. Well, I promise I’ll try not to laugh, but if you routinely get off using your electric toothbrush or something, I cannot guarantee success. Not that I’m here to kink-shame you, but there’s much more effective methods—”
“Shaddup, it’s nothing like that,” Shouta huffed, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice, and Hizashi smirked.
“So, what?”
“I… rut against my bedding.”
Hizashi blinked as pictured it. “You hump your mattress?” Something in the mental image shifted, and a slow smile spread across his face as the realization clicked. “Oh, that’s not it. You hump your pillow, right?”
Shouta glowered at him. “You said you wouldn’t laugh.”
“I’m not laughing, I’m smiling. Cuz I know I’m not very plush, but I’ve got an idea.” Hizashi had already started kicking his pants off, his lethargic limbs not fully cooperating but getting the job done well enough. “You wanna hump my thigh? Damn, if I didn’t just come a minute ago, we could frot against each other, I love that shit. Come on, take your pants off, straddle my leg, just like I’m your pillow at home.”
“You’re bonier than my pillow,” Shouta groused, notably not hesitating before standing and shoving his pants off. Hizashi stretched one leg out along the couch, the other on the floor to keep himself stable as Shouta knelt up and straddled his thigh.
“Feels good, though?” Hizashi asked as Shouta’s warm weight settled on him. He reclined back in the corner of the sofa, his legs spread wide, making sure Shouta had enough room to maneuver as he rolled his hips.
“Yeah, fuck,” Shouta said, shifting his hips again, pressing his erection harder into Hizashi’s thigh.
“Skin to skin makes it better, hmm?” Hizashi asked with a lazy grin, his hand settling on Shouta’s hip. “I mean, pillows are nice, but never quite as warm as another person.”
Shouta’s hands made their way to Hizashi’s shoulders, gripping tightly as he leaned forward before finally giving up and wrapping his arms around Hizashi’s neck, holding on as he fucked against his thigh.
Turning his head, Hizashi murmured in Shouta’s ear, “You’re so turned on right now, I can feel how much pre-come you’re leaking; I bet it makes it feel even better, doesn’t it?” His one hand began to skim up Shouta’s side, while the other one moved from along the top of the sofa to comb through Shouta’s hair. “If we were rutting against each other, we’d both be making a mess, but it makes the slide feel good, hmm? Are you usually able to go twice in a row like this?”
“I dunno,” Shouta gasped, “I’ve never been in a situation like this before.”
“Fair enough. I guess at home you just stop once you come and that’s that.”
Shouta nodded against his neck, his hips riding higher up Hizashi’s thigh. Hizashi’s oversensitivity had mostly receded, so Shouta brushing against his own soft dick was just one more sensation as he moved. There was something intimate about it, and Hizashi tried not to think about that too hard, even as the memory was burning itself into his brain. His hand in Shouta’s hair moved to cradle the back of his neck, while the other slid down to grab his glorious ass.
“Fuck, I’m getting close,” Shouta panted.
“Come whenever you want, babe, I’ve got you.” The pet name slipped out without permission, and Hizashi hoped it would go unnoticed, or at least chalked up to the heat of the moment.
Shouta gasped and whined, high-pitched noises escaping him as he moved faster, chasing release, until he turned his face towards Hizashi and pressed a messy kiss against his lips.
And what the hell else was Hizashi supposed to do about that? He couldn’t very well pull away, that would be shitty. So clearly the only choice was to kiss back, deep and needy and hope that Shouta wouldn’t understand all the inconvenient feelings that fueled Hizashi in that moment. He could only moan into Shouta’s mouth and hold him close as his body grew tense and taut, his movements quick and jerky and desperate until finally warm, wet, come spilled between them, slicking Hizashi’s leg.
Shouta’s mouth lingered against Hizashi’s as he caught his breath, and Hizashi ran his hands in soothing passes over Shouta’s sweaty, heated skin. Gradually, Shouta slumped against him, going lax and boneless.
“We gotta shower this off,” Hizashi said, nudging Shouta to get up.
“Dun wanna move,” Shouta mumbled.
“Too bad, cuz I’m not gonna wake up with come dried to my leg hair.”
Shouta groaned, but finally shifted back, getting to his feet and looking down at the mess covering his own crotch and made a face. “Mind if I use your shower after?”
“I think we can both fit together,” Hizashi laughed, grabbing Shouta’s hand and tugging him over to the shower so he could wash the worst of the mess of them both.
By the time they were clean, Hizashi was ready to pass out. There would be time for him to have any necessary emotional crises in the morning. “You wanna crash here tonight? I’ve got shorts you can borrow, and an old t-shirt.”
“Sure.” Shouta followed him to his room and donned the borrowed clothes, then turned to leave.
“Bed’s over here,” Hizashi said with a laugh.
“I figured I’d sleep on the couch.”
Hizashi arched an eyebrow at him. “You can if you want, but I’m gonna need to clean it after tonight’s festivities. And you’re always welcome in my bed.” He kept his grin plastered in place as he kicked himself mentally for phrasing it that way. “It’s not like it’d be the first time we shared.”
“It’s been a long time since high school sleep-overs,” Shouta said, the corner of his lips quirking up in a tiny, soft smile.
Hizashi rolled his eyes, hoping it disguised whatever else his face was doing at the sight of Shouta looking at him that way. “Do what you want, I’m goin’ to bed,” he huffed, flopping down on the mattress. After a moment, he felt the bed dip as Shouta settled next to him. Hizashi reached over and turned off the light, putting his glasses on his night stand.
The two of them fell quiet; but as tired as Hizashi was, he couldn’t stop thinking about everything that had happened. Wondering…
“What?” Shouta asked.
Lifting his head, Hizashi squinted at him. “What what?” he countered.
“I can tell you want to ask me something, so just ask it.”
Shit. Think fast, think fast— “I guess… I was thinking that I wouldn’t have expected you to be the manscaping type,” Hizashi said. “Can’t get you to shave your face, but you trim your pubes?”
“Bigger risk of making a mess when I take a piss if I don’t,” Shouta said.
“Ah. Makes sense,” Hizashi said solemnly. He took a breath and steeled himself. “Anyway, I hope I’ve proved my point: the size of what you’re packing doesn’t mean you can’t have an amazing sex life.” If Shouta caught feelings for Hizashi, that would be great; but if he didn’t, he still deserved whatever pleasures he could find in this fucked up world.
Shouta was quiet.
“You made your point; but I still don’t think I’m gonna be looking to hook up with anyone. People still have expectations, and I don’t need to deal with whatever bullshit comes up when I don’t measure up to them.”
“People are stupid. I’m sure you can find someone who will appreciate every piece of you.” Hizashi’s heart ached in his chest, wishing he could just come out and say what he wanted to say; to beg Shouta to let him be that person.
“Too much effort,” Shouta said.
“Well, if you’re looking for the low effort alternative, we could just keep having sex.” It was meant to sound like a joke, but Hizashi winced at the desperate note that made its way in there anyway.
“What?”
Play it cool, no big deal. “This was good. We should do it again. I mean, if you want. You already know that I like what you’re packing, no need to worry about some troglodyte’s uninformed opinion.”
“Really?” Why did Shouta sound so damn surprised? Was the sex not as good for him? No way, Hizashi knew what he was doing in the bedroom!
“I mean, it’s a win-win, right? We both get great sex, and you don’t have to deal with stupid people’s bullshit.”
“Only your bullshit,” Shouta teased, snorting in amusement.
“Yeah, but you have to deal with my bullshit anyway,” Hizashi said with a brilliant grin. Bantering with Shouta felt right, felt easy.
“Ok.”
Propping himself up on his elbow, Hizashi peered at Shouta in the dim light of the room. “Ok, as in, yes?” His heart thundered in his chest as he made sure he wasn’t misinterpreting things. “You’re on board with doing this again?”
“Just don’t be an idiot about it,” Shouta grumbled.
“Oh please, idiocy is what we both do best.” Hizashi poked Shouta in the ribs, and Shouta swatted his hand away.
This would be fine. Hizashi could totally manage this. He’d said it himself, win-win! He just didn’t let himself think about the way Shouta had kissed him earlier, and what he wanted that to mean.
Those thoughts were too dangerous with Shouta curled up on his side next to him.
Instead, Hizashi fell asleep thinking that at least part of his wish coming true was better than nothing at all.
It had taken years to get here, maybe all he had to do was keep wishing a little longer.