Archive of Our Own

Sae is lowly humming to himself as he dusts off the shelves of Ryusei’s room. He does that sometimes, even if his mother told him to grow out of that habit. People may be displeased by it, but as long as Sae does his work properly, as long as he cleans and cooks like he’s expected to, the omega doesn’t see a problem with it.

If he already had to give up his youth— his dream of becoming a soccer star— then he should at least be allowed to hum a little song to himself when he’s all alone. 

But there is one kid who’s particularly talented at catching Sae by surprise. “Saeee!” Ryusei bursts through the half-open door of his room. The omega only flinches ever so slightly, almost used to the antics by now. “What kind of song are you singing?” the youngest son of the Shidou family asks and skips over to him before tugging at the long skirt of his maid dress.

Sae sighs and looks down. Big, shimmering, pink eyes are blinking up at him. “A song I heard on the radio the other day,” he answers and then goes back to his duties. After Ryusei’s room, he still needs to clean the bathroom, mop the main hallway, and then start preparing dinner. 

“Really?” Ryusei smiles and jumps on his bed and if Sae had to guess, the little kid’s probably smiling at him with that big tooth gap of his. “What’s its name? What’s it about? It sounds nice!”

Sae wants to sigh through his nose again. “I don’t know,” he merely says. And it’s not even a lie.

The omega doesn’t really know how to deal with Ryusei most of the time— surely enough, babysitting isn’t one of his duties, thankfully. Sae may be an omega but he’s not the best with children. Although Ryusei seems to like him for some reason, it’s for the best that they don’t cross paths too often in the Shidou family home.

“Sae,” the kid then starts again when Sae moves to wipe down the windowsill. “Sae, when can we get married?” Ryusei asks and the omega almost drops his cleaning cloth.

This again, he wants to roll his eyes and scoff. But he bites his tongue because the last time he did it, one of the other omega maids heard him and ratted him out to his parents. To say Mr. and Mrs. Shidou were displeased would be an understatement. He wasn’t paid for a week as a punishment due to disrespectful behavior and his mother gave him an earful at home, too. 

Being a maid has its advantages, sure, but sometimes, Sae can’t help but wonder what his life would’ve been like if he hadn’t been forced into this by the age of fourteen. If society didn’t deem omegas as working slaves. If he hadn’t presented as one, to begin with.

He was a year older than Ryusei currently is and if he looks at the kid, sees how small and too carefree he seems and how playful he acts, Sae sometimes sees himself in him. Maybe not personality-wise, but Ryusei still has his entire life ahead of him.

And what does Sae have? He’s turning twenty-five this winter. He doesn’t have an alpha and like his surroundings are always telling him, his biological clock is ticking. Only last week when his uncle visited, he told Sae how his prime time was already halfway over and that it was time for him to finally settle down already. His parents chimed in, stressing over and over again that if Sae wasn’t working for the honorable Shidou family, they’d have set up a marriage years ago.

Which doesn’t even make any sense, Sae thinks as he clutches the cloth in his hand tighter so he doesn’t end up smashing the window in frustration instead. If his parents wanted to get him fired, they could easily do that. They’re the reason he’s working as a maid, in the first place, so why are they always holding it against him? As if they didn’t actually care about him, but were just trying to make themselves feel better. As if it was Sae’s fault for not having found a mate yet. As if it was his fault he works six days a week and barely has the time to sleep.

“Sae,” Ryusei’s voice pulls him out of his thoughts again and when he turns around, he finds the kid standing in front of him again. 

“You know we can’t marry,” he tells him once more, probably for the thousandth time by now. He stopped counting years ago. “You’re still a child and besides, you’re never going to present. You’re a beta,”

“So what about it?!” Ryusei huffs and crosses his arms in front of him, stomping his foot, too. “If I want to marry you, I can!”

Sae sighs and rubs his temples. “Ryusei,” he says and feels another headache coming. He’s been getting them a lot lately. Maybe he’s just too stressed— maybe everything is just starting to get too much. “A beta and an omega can’t be together. And,” he adds, “Don’t you want a future wife of your status? It would make your parents very happy,”

“I don’t care!” Ryusei objects and really, Sae didn’t expect something else to happen. The conversation always goes the same way. The kid would ask him why they aren’t married yet for some reason and Sae would always have to break it down to him over and over. That it’s not just a matter of age and secondary gender, but also a matter of status. Sae knows how big of a scandal it would be if the son of the wealthiest merchant family in the city married a lowly maid like him. People would be disgusted, people would insult them. And while he finds Ryusei to be annoying most of the time, Sae thinks he didn’t deserve something like that.

“I don’t care if my parents would be displeased,” the kid goes on and grumbles, more to himself, however. “I only have eyes for you! You’re so amazing and pretty, Sae.” It’s almost heart-wrenching how Ryusei’s eyes light up at that. How they sparkle as he looks up at Sae, and how his smile widens as he does. 

It leaves Sae’s throat dry. Almost ironic how the only person who seems to like him for who he is, is a kid. And a beta no less.

He spends most of his time either at work or at home with not many opportunities to meet other people; friends or let alone a potential future mate. And all the alphas who ever showed slight interest in the omega were people only interested in his looks and body. He knows they just wanted him for sex— and as a trophy wife to show off to others. Like a prize they won at a festival stand. 

Sae wants to puke.

It makes his heart sting and his chest hurt. It just feels sardonic. How the only person who says nice things like You’re so pretty or Your voice is like the one of an angel is someone who’s not destined to be with him for several reasons. It almost makes Sae laugh— how ironic his life is. It’s a joke to the universe. Maybe it’s a punishment for the actions of his past life; which is even more cynical.

“I could help you clean!” the kid goes on and puffs his chest out proudly as if trying to make Sae change his mind because of it. The omega almost smiles; it’s cute how simple Ryusei’s mind seems to run. Not affected by the oppressing and stressful expectations of society yet. “And we could hum songs from the radio together!” 

“Only omegas clean,” Sae lets him know and while his expression hasn’t changed, he may feel a little better now. Just a little. “It’s my job.”

“But you always look so sad!” Ryusei retorts and Sae bites his lip. For someone so wild and reckless, that kid sure is observant. “I could make you happy,” the kid declares and his eyes are back to sparkling. “Because you’d deserve it the most!”

And really, what Ryusei is doing is dangerous. Because he makes it seem like it’s the truth, makes it seem like Sae deserves a better life— someone who tells him how much he’s loved and not just desired because he makes a good maid and wife. He makes it seem like there’s a chance for Sae to live a normal life someday. To have a family.

Because even if he’s not the best with children, Sae still wishes to have some of his own someday. However, he knows he’d be a horrible parent because his mother is the perfect example of what happens when an unhappy and dissatisfied omega has children, and more importantly, Sae knows he’d never even get that far. Because that would mean finding an alpha and marrying them since child conceiving, let alone sex, before marriage is still frowned upon.

Sae wonders if that would ever change. Or if he has to stay miserable forever. Even Rin, who’s two years younger than him, has already found a mate. Sae likes Meguru, even if they don’t meet often because Rin moved out at the first chance he got. Sae envies his brother. He tries to be happy for him, to not let his dark thoughts and jealousy take over, but every day it becomes harder and harder to not just—

“You shouldn’t say things like that,” he forces out. Sae thinks about it briefly and then decides to ruffle Ryusei’s hair. “But,” he starts again and for the first time, the omega crouches down a little to be on the same eye level as Ryusei. “I think your future partner will be very lucky to have you,” he says and smiles at the kid gently. “You’re amazing, Ryusei,”

The kid gapes at him, obviously at a loss for words. “And now go bother another maid,” he stands back up straight again. “Before I take it back,” he threatens and while it sounds silly, Ryusei still gasps, offended, before he huffs, turns around on his heels, and storms back out of his room without a complaint.

Sometimes, it truly was too easy.

The next time Sae meets Ryusei again— or rather, the next time the kid decides to come to bother him and distract him from his actual work— is a few days later when the omega is outside, crouching down in the dirt to plant the new flowers Mrs. Shidou wants in her garden. 

He will have to wash his maid dress later because there’s no way he could go back to cleaning the house looking like this. 

Sae likes gardening. Not particularly because of the work itself but rather because he gets to be outside for a while. Being inside all the time is depressing and even when he opens the windows to let in fresh air, nothing compares to feeling the warm sun on your skin directly.

He’s just about to place the hyacinths into the raked dirt when a ball comes flying towards him, crashing directly into his hands and then the flowers. The ball falls to the ground with a small thud, the plants now squished and ugly as half of their blossoms were blown away by the impact, and there’s absolutely no way Sae can plant them anymore.

“Saeeee!” Ryusei runs towards him. “Are you okay?” he asks, visibly concerned with a frown on his face. “I’m sorry! Are you hurt?” The omega doesn’t even get the chance to say No before Ryusei slaps the ruined flowers out of his hold to grab and inspect his hands.

“I don’t know what happened,” the kid rambles on. “I just wanted to hit that tree over there!” he points at the tree almost at the other end of the garden. Sae almost snorts. Even during his childhood years when he still dreamed about becoming the best striker in the world, he managed to shoot better than Ryusei.

And even if those years when he was still so blissfully unaware of what the world will expect from him seem the furthest away as they’ve ever been, so unreachable, nothing but a bitter memory, Sae still holds them dearly. Because it was the closest to freedom he’d ever experienced.

Maybe that’s why he suddenly loses his composure. “I used to play soccer, too. And even I was better than that,” The You’re a beta and I’m an omega went without saying. Maybe the memory of the fun he had made him smile suddenly. It’s dark and gloomy though, Sae doubts it looks anywhere near as beautiful as Ryusei likes to tell him so often. 

“Really? You did?!” Ryusei asks, excited. “Do you want to play with me?” He picks up the leather ball and holds it up with sparkling eyes. Sae notices that his left foot is standing on top of the hyacinths and the plan to somehow save them, after all, goes down the drain. Like the payment he would’ve received at the end of this day. Mrs. Shidou will certainly not be pleased that a few of her flowers were destroyed. 

It’s logical, really. If Sae can’t do his work properly, he won’t receive payment. Honestly, the omega should be thankful he receives any payment at all.

Sae decides to push the thought away for now and focuses back on Ryusei who’s still blinking up at him with that hopeful look of his. “With these shoes?” Sae pulls the long skirt of his dress up a little, showing Ryusei the heels his wearing. 

“You’re badass!” the kid exclaims. “I’m sure you’d make it work!” 

“I’m not sure your parents like your choice of words,” Sae scolds half-heartedly to distract his own mind from letting his heart skip a beat from happiness. “And if you think that way,” he muses slightly, “I still wouldn’t be able to run or shoot in them properly,” 

“Then take them off! Take your shoes off!” Ryusei blurts and Sae flushes.

“You brat,” the omega says in the heat of the moment and ends up taking the ball out of Ryusei’s hands to kick it away sloppily. The soccer ball ends up a few meters away from them, somewhere in the hedges. 

But Ryusei only laughs. “No way are you better than I am!” the kid giggles and runs off to retrieve the ball. Like a puppy, Sae thinks and almost lets another smile creep on his face. 

When Ryusei returns, he demands Sae to kick it again, and the omega almost caves. But then he catches the young beta’s father standing in one of the windows and he visibly freezes. He straightens and then dusts off his maid dress.

“What’s wrong?” Ryusei asks when Sae doesn’t smile like he just did and when he doesn’t act more carefree anymore. Instead of answering, however, the omega just silently turns around and goes back to gardening. He’s wasted enough time already, he can’t afford to not get paid for a week— his mother would be asking questions and his father would look at him in disappointment again, and then they would both demand him to make it up again somehow. 

Because the money Sae makes goes directly into their bank account. It would be foolish to give an omega any sort of income. They aren’t allowed to escape their fate, so they shouldn’t even be presented with an opportunity. Or hope in general.

Sae continues raking the dirt. His heart beats loudly in his chest because he knows that once he’s finished here, Mr. Shidou will expect him in his office. Sae knows that look— it’s the look he sends Sae whenever he’s displeased with either his work or his behavior. The omega could always try his hardest to meet the expectations of perfection, and others would always find something to complain about.

(What the omega fails to notice though, is the way Ryusei turns around to meet his father’s judging gaze to glare at him. 

The man behind the window scoffs.)

“You know why I called you here, Sae?” Ryusei’s father asks. For some reason, the beta in front of him seems even angrier than the omega originally anticipated. He balls his hands into fists and clenches the skirt of his maid dress. It’s still dirty because Sae didn’t get the chance to change and wash up, and now, he looks even more beneath the rich merchant in his expensive suit. 

He looks pathetic.

“Yes, sir,” Sae answers and holds his head low. Meeting someone’s eyes would mean you’re both on the same level. But omegas don’t deserve respect, much less their own voice. “I failed to do my tasks properly,” 

“Not only that,” Mr. Shidou raises his eyebrow expectantly and takes a sip out of his whiskey glass. “First, you ruin my wife’s beautiful flowers—” I wasn’t the one to destroy them, he cusses back in his mind and tightens the grip on his maid dress. And besides, weren’t you against hyacinths the other day? “—but you also engaged in the ridiculous behavior of my son,” 

Sae looks up at that and blinks in confusion. “Pardon?”

The beta sighs heavily as if Sae is an idiot who needs an extra simple explanation of what he did wrong. But the omega isn’t even fazed. He knows what the Shidou family thinks. 

He knows they see betas above alphas and omegas even if society is run and dictated by alphas. They're frustrated with the people— how they let people driven by instincts make their laws. The Shidou family thinks it’s a weakness, a problem. They don’t understand why people who are easily manipulated by scents and pheromones are at the top of the food chain.

Sae also knows their views on omegas. If alphas are foolish, then omegas are a nuisance. Because at least, alphas are strong. They can assert dominance. But what can omegas do? Other than submit and be a breeding stock for others? They’re not only helpless against their own instincts but also weak to alphas’ presence. They are even more worthless than betas in their eyes. They don’t deserve anything other than to be ordered around.

That’s some use for them, at least. Sae’s overheard a conversation between Mr. Shidou and one of his colleagues once and what he heard both angered and didn’t surprise him in the slightest. What they fail to realize though, Sae thinks, is that this kind of thinking they’re superior to every other secondary gender doesn’t make them any better than alphas and their power trips. 

If anything, it probably makes them worse.

“My son is supposed to be attending his studies,” the beta goes on and stares the omega down. Sae averts his eyes again and bites the inside of his cheek. “And not fool around outside with useless activities,” Soccer isn’t useless though. It’s fun. “Much less with a useless maid like you,”

Sae has to try his best not to let the tears of anger escape that already sit at the corners of his eyes. He hates this, hates this so much. He wants to say something, maybe smash that godforsaken whiskey glass in the guy’s head to finally shut him up for good. He wants to lash out, scream at him, jump him. Sae wants, needs, him gone, but, of course, those are just his thoughts and wishes if he had the chance.

What would your big, fancy house look like without me? How dirty would your clothes be? What would you eat if I didn’t prepare a meal for you every single day? Do you people even know how to cook? What would your garden look like if I didn’t take care of it? And who would you use as a scapegoat for all of your wrongdoings if it wasn’t me? How more broken would your family be than it already was?

There’s so much on his mind. So much Sae wants to scream out. But all he can do is nod and apologize. “I’m sorry, sir,” he says and bows because that’s what the beta wants to see. He loves it when he gets an omega to submit to a beta, too. “I promise it will never happen again.” Even if it’s Ryusei who always seeks him out and demands attention from Sae no matter how many times the omega sends him away. 

Mr. Shidou scoffs and rolls his eyes. “I won’t pay you for the rest of the month,” he almost says triumphantly. As if he’s won a difficult argument. As if Sae had ever had a say in this, to begin with.

“Sir, if I may—”

“You may not,” the beta huffs impatiently and waves him off. “You’re dismissed. Go back to your work. And do it properly this time. Or else, I fear, I may think of something else to keep you in line,”

“Thank you, sir,” Sae says through gritted teeth before he turns on his heels and leaves the office again.

He shuts the door behind him quietly, even if he’d loved to slam it shut instead. Then, he leans against it and sighs, closing his eyes. Shit, how will he explain this to his parents? To his mother? A week without payment would’ve been bad enough already but for the rest of the month? He doesn’t even want to think about it. When he’s locked into his room later, he’ll have enough time to cry about it silently anyway.

Sighing once again, maybe wiping at his eyes, too, he collects himself and plans to go right back to work. What other choice does he have besides that? But when he straightens his posture and opens his eyes again, he almost jumps out of his own skin when Ryusei stands in front of him, looking at him with an expression the omega has never seen on the kid’s face before. 

They stare at each other for a moment and then Ryusei’s mouth opens. Sae expects his loud, energetic voice and mentally prepares himself for not being paid for another month on top, but what he hears instead is a gentle whisper. 

“If we get married,” Ryusei says and brings out a single daisy from behind his back and stretches it out for Sae to take. He does so almost automatically. “I’d never let someone talk to you like this ever again,” It feels like a promise but more like one Ryusei makes to himself than Sae. “I’m sorry you got in trouble because of me…”

And really, even if Sae wanted to, he could never be angry with Ryusei. That kid has too much of a good and pure heart; despite his rough behavior and crass language. 

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Sae whispers back and gently brushes a loose strand out of Ryusei’s face. “I’d worry more about your studies,” Ryusei’s invisible dog ears flop down at that and Sae almost smiles again. “You need to study hard, learn lots of useful things, okay? Or you’ll end up like me,” 

It’s supposed to be a warning disguised as a threat. No one should end up like him. Unloved, unwanted, replaceable. He can read and write simple sentences but never went to school, never made actual friends. He’s alone and maybe even stupid, but that’s fine as long as he can clean and cook.

He’s lucky to have this job and not be forced to work in one of the factories. Or be forced to stay at home all day and bear one child after the other.

“You’re so cool though!” Ryusei trots after him when Sae deemed this conversation to be over. “You’re always so pretty and thorough! You’d make the perfect mate! My mate, yeah?”

“Ryusei, we’ve been through this already,” Sae tells him and takes out the broom from the closet. “You’re a beta. And too young to be marrying anybody.”

“So if I’m older, you will give me a chance?” he asks so full of hope the instant No Sae was about to shoot out dies on the tip of his tongue. 

“Sure, why not,” Sae finally replies to make Ryusei stop asking once and for all. The kid will come around to understand eventually, will come to realize that a partner of his own secondary gender is much more desirable than a supposedly good-looking maid who works for his parents. “If you excuse me,” he says as he leaves a gaping Ryusei standing in the hallway.

Oh, Sae had absolutely no clue what he had promised there.

The two of them talk a little bit more often after that. Sae knows it’s wrong, that he shouldn’t allow himself to be distracted at work, but when Ryusei sneaks up to him from behind, a big grin on his face and another flower in his hand, Sae decides to care slightly less. 

Because, somehow, the kid makes working for the Shidou family easier. He’s loud and awfully touchy and clingy, but Ryusei fills the silence around him. And while Sae prefers to say nothing most of the time, the small beta forces him to engage in the conversation often enough. 

Sae doesn’t want to call it nice, but it distracts him. It keeps his thoughts away from the dreadful situation at home, from his useless prayers to the gods that his mother should stop hitting him, and from the piercing and haunting eyes of Mr. and Mrs. Shidou. It makes him temporarily forget that he might not be unlikable and unlovable, after all, and it makes him forget briefly that he’s not just a maid, not just an omega. 

It’s weird to say, but the way Ryusei talks to and with him almost gives Sae the feeling of them being on the same level. It’s ridiculous, he’s aware of that. But when you’re drowning, you start to cling to every little thread of hope.

Even if you know it’s going to tear anyway.

Because, of course, things wouldn’t stay the way Sae wanted them to be. The universe hates him— it was clear the moment it made him present as an omega and took all of his childhood dreams away from him. It’s obvious from the way it treats him. How he has to work but can’t even keep the money. How he’s punished because of other people’s fuck-ups, and how he’s mostly alone not only during work but also at home, too.

And this time, it’s no different. When he prepared breakfast in the morning, he already had a hunch. Ryusei wasn’t there to bother him, but Sae shrugged it off. Maybe he had early studies, or maybe he was just sick. Then, however, when he walked to the dining room with a fancy tray with steaming hot tea on it, he heard it. The only other two omega maids working for the Shidou’s whispering to one another.

He wasn’t able to get everything, but the most important detail stuck out to him without understanding the whole conversation: They sent him away for school, somewhere in the capital. The Shidou family sent their youngest away to turn into a son they can be proud of.

Ryusei is gone, and Sae should’ve seen it coming. 

He knew that the kid was skipping lessons regularly to meet up with him or snuck out to play with his friends. Sae was aware of the displeasure of his parents, especially with how Mr. Shidou started to literally glare at him, and started to watch Sae’s every movement like a hawk, ready to shorten his payment or to give him extra work outside of his schedule at any time.

(Just waiting for a slip-up— for a chance to make him as miserable as possible.)

So he knew Ryusei’s father would take measures to get his son back in line. Sae just didn’t expect him to send him away to a boarding school so far away from home. 

Sae wants to laugh bitterly. This feels like a joke, a terrible, awful joke. He serves the tea and pastries and then excuses himself with a bow later, striding past the two omegas, who are still giggling among each other despite having tasks to finish, who are looking at him just as condescendingly as alphas and betas do— as if they were any different from Sae, if not worse— and who are yet still not being punished as much and often as Sae despite him being the only maid who’s not secretly slacking off.

He walks past them without sparing them a glance. His heels click against the shiny marble floor, and the skirt of his long maid dress swishes around his ankles as he walks upstairs to dust off the many books in the private library. 

The big room feels gloomy, but maybe that’s just Sae’s mind dragging him down again because there are warm sun rays shining through the big windows, coloring the library in a golden light. It must be because of the sudden, unfamiliar silence surrounding the omega, that Sae is suddenly feeling so numb.

It’s just unfair. First, the universe gives him a person, even if it is just a kid, that makes Sae feel like being an omega isn’t as bad and disappointing as society makes it out to be. It gives him someone who fills the emptiness in his heart, like his little brother used to do before he moved out to live with his own mate, it gives him someone who manages to make him smile, sometimes even laugh lightly, and it gives him someone who talks to Sae like he’s not beneath them. Of lower status or gender.

And then, after Sae learns to appreciate the small warmth, it gets taken away again. Because the universe establishes its original and natural order on its own, and it was just not normal that an omega and a beta had a friendly relationship like this. If you could have even called it that. Though it doesn’t matter now anymore anyway, because Ryusei is gone.

Far away, he will be formed to his parents’ wishes. He will return as a beta who’s worthy of taking part in the family business, who’s worth trusting. Someone who will marry a beautiful beta woman once he comes back and someone who will become rich like his parents one day, probably hiring his own maids in the future, too.

Ryusei will come back as a changed man. A man who will meet his father’s expectations and a man who will meet his mother’s standards. The beta will forget about the dreams and silly promises and declarations he made, will probably forget that Sae even exists, in the first place. Maybe that would be for the best, Sae thinks, because that way, Ryusei could focus on the more important things in his life.

As Sae scrubs the floor on the second floor, kneeling in the dirty water with sweat making his bangs cling to his forehead uncomfortably, he wonders if Ryusei would forget about the promises he made to himself, too. Sae wonders if his views of the world, if his view of omegas, would change as well. He wonders if Ryusei would treat his future maids like Mr. Shidou treats his because he learned that that’s how it’s supposed to be.

Sae wants to believe it won’t happen. That Ryusei will turn out to be one of the better betas, one of the better people. He knows that kid is tough and stubborn but Sae also heard lots of rumors about those boarding schools in the capital. They’re like prisons, just for kids, and maybe, Sae has to be grateful for his mother again for insisting he become a maid instead of sending him away to an all-omega school where he’d have learned how to be a proper omega.

A proper wife.

Sae looks down at the marble floor and sees his reflection. He feels sick. He wants to punch that stupid face looking back at him, the face that earns him unhinged comments and unwanted touches from strangers every day on his way back home. 

He doesn’t understand why he’s even so worked up about it. Ryusei was an annoying brat who only bothered him. However, one look at the closed door of the young beta’s door, and Sae immediately feels bad. Ryusei has never done him wrong and just because Sae is miserable and desperate all by himself, it gives him no right to think such awful thoughts.

Especially when he reaches into the small pockets of his dress and finds a squished daisy with only half of its petal still left on in it. Sae turns it between his fingers, looks at the poor thing a little longer than he should have with a pang in his heart.

He’s going to miss the kid, and the least he can do is to keep his room clean while he’s gone. It’s one of his duties anyway but Sae wants to think he’s doing it more for Ryusei than his parents who gave him that order earlier while they were having breakfast. And while Sae was watching them with a straight back and hands folded behind him like he’s expected to do.

Ryusei’s room feels even more empty now. Half of his clothes are gone and there aren’t any open books and unorganized notes on his desk anymore. But other than that, it looks the way Sae usually finds it in the mornings. 

The bed isn’t made, the window is still open, too. There are socks and Ryusei’s pajamas lying on the carpet that’s lying slightly off-center again. One corner even flipped over.

Sae sighs and places the half-dead daisy on the desk before he starts his routine. Except that his routine isn’t truly his routine anymore because Ryusei isn’t sitting on his bed, telling Sae about how he’s planning on sneaking out again this time. He’s not there to tell Sae about the things he read about in a novel last night or about the nice paintings he saw on his trip to town the other day.

He’s not there to tug at his dress either and look at him with that big, unjudging smile of his. He’s not looking at him with those eyes that make Sae feel like he’s worth something, and he’s not bothering him with that stupid, annoying question if—

A small note falls out of Ryusei’s blanket when Sae picks it up to fold it neatly. 

The omega blinks down at it, once, twice, before leaning down to pick it up.

When he unfolds it, he immediately recognizes the scrunkly handwriting. The smeared letters and ink stains are somewhat Ryusei’s trademark. Sae smiles a little before he starts reading.

Dear Sae, it reads.

Even when I’m far away, I will never stop thinking about you. 

I will miss you dearly. Please wait for me.

Don’t marry anyone while I’m gone.

Sae doesn’t want to admit it, but he lets out a huff of laughter. He shakes his head and pockets the note after folding it back together. Even so far away, Ryusei still manages to ask his famous question of the day. 

He just wished the decision of mating and bonding with someone else was his to make, too. If his mother would want him to get pregnant, she could set up an arrangement. And Sae would need to lower his head and hold his tongue if he doesn’t want to end up as a homeless and neglected prostitutes. He passes enough omegas on the streets on his way home who sell their bodies just to pay for a single meal per day. If they were lucky.

Sae sighs and shakes his head. There’s no need to think about the future. No one knows what the universe still has in stall for him. It probably can’t be anything good, Sae thinks bitterly, but he wouldn’t be able to do anything against it either.

All he can do is wait and see. To continue to do his work properly, to follow orders, and to sit still and look pretty whenever his parents drag him out.

Sae is thirty years old when he thinks he’s hit the lowest point in his dreadful, miserable life. 

He had an exhausting day of work behind him— Mrs. Shidou always found little, trivial things to complain about. She told him that the floor he had just cleaned wasn’t spotless like she wanted it to be, told him that the way he rearranged the vases on the shelf pissed her off (even though Sae hadn’t even touched them that day), and told him that his meals tasted especially plain that day. 

The Shidou family employed another new maid because one was fired due to spilling hot soup all over Mr. Shidou’s lap. And while Sae doesn’t mind having a new colleague, the other omega is always chirping and being friendly towards him, he’s, simply said, an idiot. And Sae means that in the nicest way possible. He’s clumsy and keeps tripping over his own feet, and he constantly forgets where things are and how to do things properly. So he keeps bothering Sae, and Sae has almost been doing the work of two maids for the past few days.

And now, when his head is already hammering and when he already has trouble keeping his back straight and his eyes open, his mother has called him to the kitchen and made him sit down at the table. She doesn’t bother to sit down, instead, she stands a few meters away from him and goes back and forth. And, shit, Sae knows whatever he’s done now, he’s in trouble again.

Which is awfully ironic. He’s an adult. He’s been alive for thirty years, and yet, he’s still being scolded and punished like a little kid. It makes him feel like one, too, as pathetic as it sounds. He’s scared of his mother, even if she’s an omega like him, and he’s scared of what she is about to say.

“Sae,” she begins, and Sae tenses. He feels his muscles stiffen and his heartbeat pick up. This is not going to end well. “Hirato-san called earlier,” she goes on and oh, Sae knows what she’s about to say next. “He doesn’t want a second meeting with you,”

The omega grits his teeth and starts fidgeting with his fingers. He already knew the alpha his mother tried to set him up with would decline another meet-up with how that sort of blind date turned out. Sae hadn’t said a single word that day and apart from some forced talking, the alpha didn’t say anything either.

“How many times has this happened so far?” Eleven times, Sae answers in his thoughts but keeps it to himself. “Sae, do you think this is all a joke? What I’m trying to do here?”

He glances up at her nervously, but when he sees the furious and fed-up look on her face, Sae quickly looks back down. There’s a dirty spot on the table.

“Hirato-san said you didn’t even say anything,” his mother crosses her arms in front of her chest, glaring down at him. “Would you mind telling me what games you’re trying to play here? Do you plan on being single forever? You know that your time for conceiving children is limited! Or do you want to become a cheap whore like Yuri from next door?” she keeps bombarding him with questions, her loud tone echoing through the empty house. “Mm? Is that what you want?”

“He didn’t allow me to speak,” Sae whispers in defense. He doesn’t know how many times his mother has told him to only speak when spoken to, or when an alpha specifically allows it. He just did what she spent years of his teenage years beating into his head. 

“Don’t you dare talk back to me!” his mother rages instead, shutting her son up immediately again. She is very good at that. “Now you’re deciding to play by the rules? After years of shame and disappointment you’ve brought to the Itoshi family?”

Sae flinches in his seat.

“I can thank the gods for at least one child that has turned out right. Why can’t you be like your brother? Just settle with someone and bear a few children, why is that so difficult for you? Why won’t you get this into that thick, stubborn head of yours?”

He has to try his hardest not to let the tears form. He has to stay strong now. He needs to face the outlash of his mother, he needs to listen and hear her talk before he can hide away in his room for the rest of the evening.

“There you go again! Looking at me with that dreadful expression!” his mother spits out. “As if I’m the villain here while you’re the one trying to run from your true purpose,” She huffs and Sae bites the inside of his cheek.

He wants to yell back at her. He wants to tell her he hates her, wants to tell her that she’s the reason he regrets ever presenting as an omega. His mother is an omega, too— she should know what it’s like. She should try to protect her child from the inequity and cruelty of society, should want to give her child the best possible life. And what does Sae get? A job where he’s not even allowed to keep his earned money, but still has to sell his body and voice for it.

A mother who seemingly hates him. A mother who was put through so many awful things by her mother and who’s now passing the tradition on to Sae. A mother who’s jealous of his looks and body, and a mother who won’t allow her son to live a better life than her. No, she wants it to hurt, wants to break Sae. He sees it in her disgusted eyes and pursed lips.

“I will give you one more chance to do things right,” she tells him and Sae swallows dryly. “And if you fail, I will set up an arranged marriage for real, that much I can promise you, Sae. Because I’ve had enough,” she says, annoyed. 

“You’re an omega for a reason,” his mother goes on and Sae just wishes she’d shut up already. “You have a bosom, alphas like that, even if yours is unattractively small,” she tells him and Sae feels sick instantly. His heart stings, his chest tightens, and his stomach turns. He wants to throw up, wants the ground to swallow him right now. “Seduce them if necessary, for goodness sake! Pull your dress up by accident, rip it, I don’t care! If you’re already so shamelessly making things harder for me, then you could also resort to shameless methods!” She’s panting now and the whole situation is so ridiculous, Sae almost laughs out loud. 

His pulse spikes.

“An alpha wouldn’t care about your awful personality as long as you satisfy them in bed and give them children. You could do that, right, Sae?” She dares to ask. “At least be good for something,” 

And before she finally turns on her heels to leave him sitting alone in the kitchen, she says: “And tomorrow will be your last day at work. I need you to focus on more important things from now on.”

When Sae walks into his small, dark room, he feels more helpless than ever. He curls in on himself on his bed and just starts crying into his pillow. He wants to disappear, he wants his mother gone. Who, despite being an omega and having no rights herself, still dictates Sae’s life in every aspect. His father just does whatever his wife wants him to. 

If Sae wasn’t sobbing right now, wasn’t her victim ever since the day he presented, he’d almost call it romantic. 

He clutches his pillow and chokes on a sob. He just wants to be free, is that too much to ask for? He wants to do what he wants— he wants to find an alpha who matches him and wants to play soccer until he passes out. Sae wants to start a family on his own, without someone deciding what he can and can’t do. He wants to bring children of his own to this world, but if they’d just grow up like him, with a tyranning grandmother and an unbothered alpha as a husband, then, Sae thinks, he’d rather cut out his uterus than do that to his children.

Because if he was a mother…Sae lets a hand travel down to his lower stomach and lets it rest there…he’d want them to be happy. He’d want them to follow their dreams, their passions, and mate whoever and whenever they want.

Rin comes to his mind then. Sae hopes he’s doing fine with Meguru— so far away from their mother. He’s not even allowed to see them, and gods, does he miss his little brother. Maybe, Sae thinks, he’d be able to meet up with him again if he does as his mother says. Marry someone, even if he hates them, just to get it over with. 

He could deal with everything else later.

Because as he clutches his pillow, imagining it’s someone he could hug right now, he thinks that he just wants everything to finally end already. Even if he continued to be miserable and sad every day, he wouldn’t have to bear constant nagging every day at least. He wouldn’t be punished anymore, wouldn’t be screamed at, and wouldn’t be looked at with condescension any longer either.

He’d be left alone for good. Or, at least, until his mother found another reason to complain about. (He’s an omega, he doesn’t deserve any kind of freedom.)

Sae just wants a bit of peace, that’s all he longs for in the endless void of his silent room.

His head feels as if it’s about to explode when he enters the mansion of the Shidou family the next day. Sae didn’t get one minute of sleep yesterday, his mind too occupied with overthinking about his future. Bluntly said, he doesn’t know what he’s even doing anymore. He feels lost and vulnerable. He feels like a deer standing in the blinding lights of a speeding car.

His mother has already called Mr. Shidou, telling him that Sae won’t be working anymore from tomorrow on. To say the beta was displeased would be an understatement. 

Sae’s surprised he didn’t start screaming at the omega when he came to serve breakfast, but only glared at him in disgust instead. Mrs. Shidou shook her head in annoyance as well, however, Sae paid her no mind. He’s conflicted about his work here, there are some days it serves as an escape from reality (his mother), and there are days when Sae just wants to walk out and never come back.

Today’s such a day and the irony of it couldn’t be more bittersweet.

“Sae,” the voice of Mr. Shidou sounds from behind him, stern and shrill, and the omega almost drops the picture frame he holds. 

“Yes, sir?” He turns around and bows. 

“I expect you to be on your best behavior even on this last day—”

“—Of course—”

“I haven’t finished yet!” the beta snaps impatiently and stomps his crane on the ground. Sae flinches and immediately apologizes, but Mr. Shidou is already fed up enough with him. “Maybe it’s a good thing you finally leave,” he clicks his tongue. “My wife wanted me to fire you for a while now,” he goes on and Sae balls his hands into fists. Oh, you’re acting generous now? Acting as if you did me a favor? After everything I’ve done for you? After everything I’ve sacrificed for you?

The beta looks Sae up and down one final time. “What a shame,” he shakes his head and leaves Sae alone again. The omega doesn't know what that last statement was for, but it pisses him off anyway. Disgusting. 

When he’s sure the beta is gone for good, he slaps the wet cloth in his hands onto the cabinet in anger. He mumbles something inaudible under his breath and stomps over to the window where he halts again. 

The sun stands high above him, the rays warming his face through the glass. He might almost forget why he’s frustrated, in the first place, when he watches the fields stretch into the distance. Clouds are passing by and the grass and trees are rocking gently in the wind. 

Looking at those things, you could almost think the world is a beautiful place, after all.

Sae is so deep in thought, he almost misses the door to the study room being locked. Before he can turn around, his body tenses when alpha pheromones fill his nostrils. The muddy, earthy scent seeps through his veins and while Sae has never smelled a scent like this before, he feels oddly calm. His first instinct isn’t to protect himself but to relax. 

He doesn’t feel dizzy or hazy either, no, if anything, he feels his mind sharpen as he slowly inhales more of the pheromones.

“Sae,” a voice calls his name and Sae doesn’t need to see the person behind him to finally know who’s the owner of this intriguing scent. He’d heard that voice before— when it was a lot higher and squeakier, but he’d recognize it anywhere. That voice used to bother him so much, it’s probably impossible to forget.

“So you presented as an alpha after all,” Sae says and finally turns around. When he catches sight of Ryusei standing in front of the locked door, with matured features and a sheepish, yet playful smile on his face, he feels his heart skip a small beat. His hair has grown out a bit, too, and is definitely styled better than it used to be.

“I promised you?” Ryusei retorts and Sae doesn’t know why it sounds like an obvious question. As if he’s forgotten something very important and Ryusei is trying to remind him again. “You look as gorgeous as ever,” he smiles, and oh, Sae didn’t expect that. It’s been such a long time since he’s heard a genuine compliment like that. It’s so heartwarming, and so overwhelming on top of everything else, Sae feels like crying again.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” the omega lets a small smile betray him. “But the thing you did to your hair…” Sae suppresses another smile. “Certainly exotic,” 

He watches as Ryusei pouts. “It has style, okay?” he defends himself and then rolls a strand with pink dyed tips between his fingers. “…You hate it?” 

“No,” Sae immediately says because he’s no liar. “It suits you,” he tells Ryusei. The alpha’s eyes light up like they always did when Sae complimented him and it makes the omega almost feel nostalgic. It makes something old and forgotten spark to life in his heart that Sae instantly swallows down again.

There’s no place and no time for feelings and emotions right now. This is his last day of work. And certainly the last time he’ll ever see Ryusei again because once he’s married, he will be able to count the days he’d leave the house every month on a single hand.

When it’s silent for a moment between them, Sae sees this as a good chance to end it here. Before his heart and mind start getting ahead of themselves again, giving him weird ideas that he’ll regret later on anyway.

“It was nice seeing you again—” he attempts to say but Ryusei shakes his head, interrupting him with a, “I overheard the talk you had with my father just now,”

“You eavesdropped,” Sae corrects him, almost accusingly but oddly enough, Ryusei isn’t fazed by that. He doesn’t pout or grumble something under his breath, no, instead, he starts looking even more serious at Sae. It makes the omega squirm in place— back then, it was already hard enough to try and guess what was on his mind, but now? After all those years? 

Sae might as well have a stranger stand in front of him right now. He bites his lip.

“What do you want me to say?” he asks Ryusei and folds his hands. The omega searches the other’s face for something, but the alpha just stares back, unmoving.

Then, he walks a few steps closer. Ryusei averts his eyes for a moment before determination returns to his face. “Do you remember what I promised?” he asks. “Before I was sent away?”

Sae blinks at that. “You promised me a lot of things with that imagination of yours,” he replies. “Pretty amusing,” 

Ryusei’s eyebrows furrow at that. He doesn’t know why. Has he said something wrong? The alpha hadn’t expected to take him seriously, had he? It was lukewarm and childish, why would Sae hold onto a promise a thirteen-year-old declared to him? Most of which he can’t even recall anymore? 

“Do you remember that day when I ruined Mother’s flower with my soccer ball and my father didn’t pay you for a month?” That happened more than once, Sae wants to say but keeps his mouth shut. Ryusei is being genuine, and Sae knows what it's like to not be taken seriously all too well. Or to have one’s feelings stomped and spit on. “I told you I’d never treat you like that if you were my wife,” the alpha shifts in his place, seeming to contemplate something, and then takes another step closer to where Sae is standing.

“And you…you said you’d give me a chance when I’m older, no? Well,” Ryusei says, trying to act self-confident while Sae notices the nervous underlying tone. “Here I am?” He laughs, a little anxious, yet not any less dishonest. “Are you…” he trails off again. “Happy about that?”

Quite frankly, Sae is at a loss for words. He made that ridiculous promise in the heat of the moment; impulsively. He just agreed to make Ryusei stop asking. Maybe making him happy, too, because Ryusei cheered him up. Looking at it now, and seeing how Ryusei has clung to this half-hearted lie, Sae feels bad and guilty. For giving him hope. And Sae, out of all people, should know what hope and desperation become if mixed together. 

“Ryusei…I—”

“I know you weren’t serious,” Ryusei chuckles a little and Sae doesn’t know if he’s offended, sad, or just generally joking about the past. “But I was, alright?” he quickly goes on and finally closes the distance between them. Now, the alpha is standing in front of Sae and he has to realize how tall and broad Ryusei has grown. His scent is thicker now, more intense, and Sae thinks he might even flutter his eyelashes at the other because of it.

“I meant everything I said,” the alpha gently takes one of Sae’s hands and places it in his own. It’s bigger than his own, his long fingers wrapping around his with ease. He starts caressing the back of Sae’s hand with his thumb and the act makes his heart swoop. It makes his breath hitch and his stomach drop. He feels his muscles trembling and his chest tighten.

And then, to make matters even worse, he feels his inner omega perk up. The one Sae thought was long dead, buried forever underneath the dread and rotten dreams. The one Sae thought he’d never feel again, never connect with again. 

With a shaking breath, Sae dares to look up at the alpha whose eyes still carry the same kindness and adoration they used to have. He sees Ryusei swallow, sees his Adam’s apple bob, and the motion almost captures him if it wasn’t for the gentle, warm hand that’s suddenly cupping his left cheek. 

The omega flinches a bit, not used to a careful gesture like that. He’s never had an alpha touch him so thoughtfully and he’s never had an alpha look at him so intensely. So genuine. Ryusei smiles again and Sae wants to push him away, to yell at him to get lost because What the fuck is wrong with you? but he doesn’t.

He can’t.

And it’s not because the alpha is keeping him there, forcing him to endure it, but because Ryusei treats him like he’s always wished for an alpha to treat him. Even if he’s a lowly omega, a mere, useless maid, he’d also dreamed of finding the right person. Someone who didn’t look down on him, someone who believed in him, and yet didn’t shy away from giving him compliments either.

With his childish dreams long given up on, Sae wonders if such a person even exists.

“You deserve the world, Sae,” Ryusei tells him and Sae almost makes the mistake of believing him. The alpha caresses his cheek— and Sae would really like to lean into the touch. Ryusei’s hand is so big and warm, and it’s been so long since Sae was held like this, that he briefly just forgets.

About everything.

“The thought of you still being here after I return home kept me going,” Ryusei says and starts nuzzling Sae’s neck. Lips brushing over his sensitive skin lightly, kissing the unmarked scent gland so carefully, Sae might get sick from it. “Not a single day passed where I didn’t think of you,” he continues and snakes his muscular arms around Sae’s waist.

His breath gets caught in the omega’s throat and his head starts spinning. 

“You were on my mind every passing minute,” Ryusei tightens his embrace and pulls Sae even closer, burying his head into the crook of the omega’s neck to inhale his floral scent. “Your smile, your voice…” the alpha counts and with every word, Sae’s heart begins to beat faster. “Your eyes, your hands. I thought about how I’d finally make you mine once I got back. And that no one will be able stop me,”

Ryusei leans back to look Sae in the eyes again. Ambition and determination shimmering in them. “Sae, I want you to become my omega,” he tells him but Sae looks away immediately, squeezing his eyes shut. “I want to be the alpha to your omega,” he says. “I want you to be my wife—”

“Stop!” Sae almost yells and Ryusei instantly lets go of him. He hates it; hates how it makes him feel cold and empty, how it leaves him yearning for his warmth again. “Stop it, please,” he says quieter this time. He hugs himself, trying to suppress the rising guilt and frustration his inner omega makes him feel.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” Sae’s voice trembles. He feels ugly. “You’re mistaking the admiration you felt as a kid and now, you think you actually like me, but listen, Ryusei—”

But before he can finish whatever he was about to say, Ryusei’s eyebrows furrow, and with a single, swift spin, he pulls Sae backward onto one of the couches in the study room. The omega lets out a surprised yelp and once he sees the alpha looming over him, every word dies at the tip of his tongue.

“No, you listen!” Ryusei growls. His earthy pheromones wrap around Sae like a soft blanket— he doesn’t want to push the alpha off. He likes the weight on top of him, and gods, were those his sharp canines? Sae’s inner omega preens and Sae feels so foolish for ever believing that Ryusei’s attractive features wouldn’t get to him. Wouldn’t affect him.

“I didn’t spend these past years running after an illusion. I may be an alpha but I’m not stupid, Sae!” he barks out and for a moment, Sae is stunned into silence. “I know what I want, what my alpha wants, and I also know what you want,” It sounds wrong, it should sound wrong, but it doesn’t feel that way. With any other alpha, Sae would have long tried to scratch their eyes out but with Ryusei…

“I know that I love you, always have, always will!” he declares and Sae’s heart swoops again. “And I also know that I could treat you right. Because I’d never tell you to shut up, I’d never force you into submission, I’d never order you around like a slave. I’d cherish and worship you because fuck the system! Alphas should always treat their omegas right, they’re the backbone of a functioning society!” 

Ryusei is breathing hard above him, his chest heaving, and Sae stares up at him with wide eyes, once again speechless. “And you know what?” the alpha keeps raging, seemingly angry with everything but Sae. “If there’s anyone who should lead us, it’s them! If there’s one thing that good forsaken alphas-only school has taught me these past years, it’s how stupid and incapable they are. Alphas think they’re so superior but will start a fistfight with you when someone hurts their itty bitty, wee-wee feelings, and—”

Sae laughs. Laughs so hard like he’s never done so before in his entire life. “Wee-wee feelings?” he giggles and starts covering his mouth with the back of his hand before an embarrassing snort could escape him. He suddenly feels so light, so unbothered, it should scare him. “Where have you learned that? In that elite boarding school?” 

Ryusei doesn’t answer, but instead leans down and kisses him softly.

His lips are warm, just like the rest of his body. They move slowly against Sae’s and they taste so good, Sae finds himself wrapping his arms around the alpha’s neck, keeping him close. It’s his first kiss and never in a million years had he thought that it would feel like this— amazing, mesmerizing, hypnotizing. He never thought that his insides could feel so warm and mushy, that he could feel little fireworks explode in his veins.

When Ryusei breaks the kiss and stares down at him with hooded eyes, lips glossy, Sae wants to lean up and savor him again. “Sae,” the alpha whispers and Sae can feel his hot breath against his cheek. “Let me prove it to you,” he pecks his lips once more, “that I’m the alpha you deserve. An alpha worth keeping,”

Sae doesn’t understand. How Ryusei always makes it his choice. He doesn’t get how it’s suddenly up to him whether or not to let the alpha in. After all these declarations of making Sae his, too— as if a simple omega like Sae could ever refuse that. 

He wants to do the right thing at least once in his life. And he feels like— feels like he’d regret walking away now. When he marries an alpha who locks him in their house, forcing him to take care of their children who’d also end up hating him one day because Sae’d be miserable and horrible, then he wants to have one nice memory to think back to.

He’d think back to the way Ryusei made him feel alive, made him believe he was an actual person instead of a mere stupid omega.

“Please,” he says and shifts in place. “After such a speech, how could I resist?”

“Now you’re just mocking me,” Ryusei says and for a moment, Sae thinks he’s gone too far. But then the alpha grins lazily. “I like that,” he snickers and clashes their lips together once more. This time, however, the kiss feels more heated, more violent. Ryusei licks against Sae and the omega shivers. 

He moans quietly when the alpha licks directly into his mouth next, pushing his tongue in as if he’s done this a dozen times already. Maybe he has, maybe he— no. Sae doesn’t want to think about it. At least not now, not yet. So he just deepens the kiss, pulls Ryusei closer with the intention of never wanting to let go of him again. 

Big, warm hands are on his waist next, steadying him. “Sae,” Ryusei breathes out, his face already flushed. “Raise your back a little,” he whispers against his lips and Sae does as he’s told. Not because it was a command, or an alpha voice, but because Ryusei said it with such a soft tone, his heart was melting. “Like that,” the alpha growls out, seemingly content, as he loosens the big ribbon at the back of Sae’s maid dress. 

The apron comes off easily, and Ryusei lets it fall to the ground next to the couch without sparing it a single glance. His entire attention and focus is on Sae right now, and how he could rip that dress off of the omega as fast and swift as possible.

When he starts to fumble with the buttons on his back, Sae can’t help but let another small huff of laughter escape his lips. The way Ryusei struggles to open his dress is almost cute— it’s almost ironic, too. The way his mother buttons them up carefully every morning, making sure the dress sits tightly on him, compared to Ryusei’s rushed and impatient fumbling to get it off him.

Sae feels heat rush down to his core. He feels so excited, but upon further pondering, he doesn’t know whether it’s because this is his first time having sex, or just the general thrill of breaking the rules. The norm. 

Ryusei growls victoriously when the dress finally slips off Sae’s shoulder and when the alpha can finally pull it off entirely. With his hazy vision, Sae can still make out the expression on Ryusei’s face. How lidded eyes are staring down at his naked body— shoes and tights lost somewhere in the process of undressing the omega. How said eyes observe and watch him; as if Sae is the alpha’s next prey. As if he’d eat him any second now.

A little hesitant at first, Sae reaches out his hands to let them roam around on the clothed chest of the alpha. Underneath his fancy, expensive shirt, he can feel firm and lean muscles. Sae swallows at that and instinctively pushes his chest out. “Don’t you want to get rid of those?” he asks and tucks at Ryusei’s clothes. “Don’t want me to see your body?” he wonders out loud and by now, his inner omega is doing most of the thinking and reacting. “I bet you have a nice body…” Sae mumbles, too focused on trailing his finger down Ryusei’s chest to his stomach to realize the effect his statement has on the alpha.

“Fuck, Sae,” Ryusei pants, and Sae preens when he feels roaming hands on his own body. “Do you have the slightest idea how many times I’ve fantasized about this?” he asks and Sae hums lowly when the alpha squeezes his small tits, brushing his thumbs over his sensitive nipples. “How many times I’ve wished to have you under me like this?”

Ryusei’s hands travel down his soft stomach, lingering over his womb just a split second longer, before he makes his hands go further down. They brush over his small omega cock that lies uselessly and hard against his hip— Ryusei licks his lips when he finally gets down to Sae’s thighs. He squeezes their tender insides tightly, massages the milky, plump flesh. 

“You look even more beautiful than the silhouette I saw when I spied on you showering once,” Ryusei moans. “These curves, so perfect,”

“Gods, look at you,” he goes on and groans, a low growl escaping him, too. He rumbles softly when he pushes Sae’s thighs apart and sees a trail of slick already gushing out of his pink hole. “You’re a wet dream— this exactly what I imagined when I jerked off in my bed every night,” he huffs and Sae feels himself flush even more. “Or when I secretly watched you change once,” he sighs dreamily, “Or that other time when—”

“You’re a pervert,” Sae interrupts Ryusei’s desperate panting but he can’t help but giggle a little. “Ryusei,” he tugs at the alpha’s shirt again. “Off…please,”

“Fuck, of course,” the alpha rushes to take his clothes off finally. “Whatever you want, princess,” And maybe it’s the sudden pet name or the way Sae finally sees Ryusei’s muscles flex for real, but Sae feels his stomach tingle and another wave of slick trickle down his thighs. It’s embarrassing how affected he is by a simple gesture like this but when he suddenly watches Ryusei’s dick spring out of his pants, there’s a sudden want pooling in his gut.

Want and hunger like he’s never felt them before. Greed. Desperation. 

“Like what you see?” Ryusei slurs high on pheromones, and Sae actually purrs. The alpha gulps and leans down once more. Their nude bodies rub against each other and Sae feels as if he’s about to explode. The heavy weight of the alpha on top of him sends pleasurable shivers down his spine, and the muddy, earthy scent lulls him in. It wraps around his head, making it spin, and dulls his senses. 

He likes being squeezed, being held down, and not being able to move properly. The alpha is heavy but Sae doesn’t mind. He feels Ryusei’s long dick rub against him and as much as he wants to hate it, he can’t, because it just feels so good. So pleasurable. He can feel it twitch against his thigh, can feel the warmth radiating off of it. He inhales the aroused pheromones and heat washes over him once more, seeping through his veins and muscles like hot water.

He has to realize that he likes an alpha being in control after all, and shit— why does he like the idea of submitting all of a sudden? 

It goes against everything he’s ever promised himself, but when his inner omega starts to claw at his insides, demanding to be let out, demanding that Sae acts according to his instincts— to bare your neck, to arch your back, push out your chest, wanting to be bred and folded in half— then he doesn’t find any rationality left inside his fuzzy brain. No thoughts, just pure desire to give himself to the alpha in charge.

There’s a rumble against his throat when Ryusei nuzzles his neck again, rubbing one of his wrists against Sae’s unmarked scent gland. The alpha is scenting him and with his heartbeat skyrocketing, and his hole leaking, this is the final push Sae needs to let himself be overcome by sheer lust.

Mewling against the side of Ryusei’s head, he lets his hand run through the alpha’s blond strands. They’re soft and Sae distantly, somewhere deep in his mind, decides to like how cool they are against his fingers. He enjoys the smell, too, and gods, everything about the alpha is so addicting. 

Sae can’t get enough.

Ryusei bites down on his sensitive, flushed skin teasingly, making Sae tighten the grip on his hair, fisting it. “Ryusei,” he pants, weakly. “You—”

“You smell so divine,” Ryusei mouths at his neck, teeth grazing his scent gland again. A shiver runs down the omega’s back and he grips the alpha’s hair even tighter, making him groan. “Fuck—hng—You match me on so many levels— see, together our scents create a spring meadow,” 

Inhaling sharply, Sae can distantly register what the alpha is saying. However, his mind is busy thinking about something else. He imagines that long, big dick again and wonders how it must feel inside him— how well it will fill him up and complete him. How long it will take him to fully adjust to it, and how far it will reach inside.

Will it be able to touch his womb? Will Ryusei fuck a baby right into it? Sae whines at the thought loudly, grinding down against the alpha’s thighs.

As if reading his mind, or maybe because he saw how desperate Sae looked, Ryusei brings a hand down to Sae’s empty, quivering hole. He circles his rim, making Sae mewl against him as he kisses him, before finally pushing a finger into his dripping entrance. 

It squelches obscenely, and Sae throws his head back immediately. The intrusion feels weird and unfamiliar at first, but then it suddenly crashes down on him the moment Ryusei starts thrusting his long finger in and out of him at a steady pace. It’s a ruthless pace— slow at first and getting faster and faster by the second.

Sae moans loudly as a second finger is pushed into him with the same speed. Ryusei grins when the omega chokes on a sob the moment he parts his fingers, scissoring Sae’s slick hole with his pace never wavering.

Sae’s back arches and he subconsciously tries to meet the alpha’s thrusts. His lips part in a silent scream when Ryusei suddenly finds a spot that sends sparks of electricity through his entire body. He jerks his hips and bites his lips— groans before saliva is running down the corners of his mouth.

The alpha grins against his lips as he kisses him, whispering soft praises and more compliments into Sae’s ear with that deep voice of his. Sae only registers roughly a third of them, too caught up on the way Ryusei’s fingers work inside of him, rubbing against that one specific spot over and over again until Sae feels his bones melting.

They push in and out of him without mercy, push against his walls, and suddenly start dragging moan after moan out him. At a particularly angled thrust, Sae mewls so sinfully loudly that even in his dizzy state, he slaps a hand over his mouth. “Don’t hide,” Ryusei tells him with a lazy smirk as he gently pries the hand off again. “Your voice is too beautiful to be silenced,” he kisses him slowly, licks against his tongue and teeth. “And your sounds are so cute, I want to keep hearing them forever.”

The alpha’s other hand caresses Sae’s twitching side. Brushing over his jerking hips and jiggling tits. ”I want to keep you here forever,” he whispers. “You look so good underneath me, Sae,”

Where you belong, his inner omega finishes.

“Ryu—Ryusei,” the omega whines. Slick won’t stop gushing out of him as the alpha mercilessly punctuates his fingers at Sae’s favorite spot and Sae doesn’t want to imagine how much trouble he’ll have trying to clean up the ruined leather of the study room couch later. “Ryu—hngg—” he mewls and tugs at Ryusei’s hair again. “Please,” he doesn’t know what he’s begging for. “Isn’t that—” he pants helplessly without realizing what he’s actually saying, “isn’t that enough?” 

He blinks up at Ryusei with tears already starting to form at the corners of his eyes and Sae could swear he saw something melt in the alpha’s eyes. 

“I just don’t want to hurt you,” Ryusei says and swiftly adds a third finger. Sae screams. “My knot is pretty big, you know…” the alpha trails off and at first, Sae doesn’t register the word but once he does, he subconsciously clenches tightly around Ryusei’s fingers, making them both groan. “Fuck, you like that, baby?” Ryusei pants and forces his digits deeper inside Sae. “You like thinking about my knot? Thinking about how it will feel inside you?”

Sae, choking on a sob, shakes his head. He doesn’t trust what he’s hearing, doesn’t know what he’s saying either when he feels his mouth open. He feels so light and carefree, he feels as if his soul left his body and now watches himself writh underneath the alpha. He feels so detached, so distracted, so fuzzy and tingly that he completely forgets what they’re about to do.

What Ryusei’s about to do.

The omega feels so good, clenching around these long fingers that press against his insides, that brush over that especially sensitive spot over and over again. It makes Sae arch his back further, push his chest out more, just to enjoy this feeling even longer. He wants to thrive like this forever— why did society deem sex as something derogatory? When it feels so amazing? When it sets your insides ablaze, makes you so wet the alpha’s fingers slip out of your hole a few times?

“You’re so wet,” Ryusei breathes into his ear as if reading his dirty, lustful mind, and Sae mewls in embarrassment, instinctively tightening the grip he has on the alpha. “So warm and perfect,” Ryusei drags his tongue across the scent gland of his neck. “And your smell…” he groans and Sae whines. “You like this. You enjoy how my fingers pump inside you, yeah? How they stretch you open like that?’

The alpha spreads his fingers and then angles them just right, and Sae starts drooling again, mouth falling open and eyes rolling back. Point proven.

“Oh, baby,” Ryusei moans. “You’re more than just a wet dream,” he says and finally removes his fingers. Sae imagines how sticky they must feel, how they must glisten from all the slick, but then his mind drifts off again. He feels empty, he doesn’t like that. He wants more, more, he wants to feel full again, wants to have something scratching his walls again.

Heat pools in his gut and a wave of electricity shoots through his entire body. He shivers and trembles, and Ryusei coos at the sight. “Gods, you’re so perfect, Sae,” he tells him, and his inner omega purrs at that. He yearns for the compliments, wants to hear more of them. The alpha makes him feel safe, truly wanted— something no one has ever made Sae feel before. 

He feels his legs being lifted, held together by Ryusei’s strong, muscular arms, as they’re being thrown over his shoulder. His heart leaps and stomach drops, more slick trickling down his hole. 

“You ready, baby?” Ryusei grins and Sae can feel how he’s aligning his dick with his quivering hole. The alpha teases his rim for a moment, making him buck his hips. “Fuck—” Ryusei pants when he presses his tip against the warm hole of the omega. “Fuck, baby, I’m gonna do it, okay?” 

He doesn’t wait for the omega to answer, Sae is already too lost in his own instincts to even form a coherent answer anyway.

The alpha pushes in slowly, never stopping despite how much Sae is trashing and clenching around him. Tears run down the omega’s flushed face and a sob escapes his lips when Ryusei pushes in the last few inches in one go. Rough, deep— Sae’s eyes go crisscrossed and he starts jerking uncontrollably. His muscles spasm and his breath gets caught in his throat.

“Big—” he gasps and tries holding onto something with his hands. He finds a pillow and hugs it. His breath hitches uncontrollably and his pulse spikes. His heart beats so loudly in his chest that he thinks it’s about to explode. “You’re so—hngg,” Ryusei experimentally moves his hips slightly. “So—”

“Shh, it’s okay,” Ryusei comforts and brings a gentle hand to Sae’s face to wipe away a falling tear. (Sae doesn’t see how the alpha licks his finger afterward.) “You’re doing such a good job,” Ryusei starts moving again. Slowly, carefully. “So good, my omega. You’re taking me so well. Does it feel good?” the alpha asks and grabs the omega’s hips with his hand that’s not holding up his legs. “Does my dick fill you up nicely? Does it reach all the way up?” he tightens the grip on his hips and then places his hand on Sae’s lower stomach. “All the way up to your womb—?” 

“You—ahh—talk too much,” Sae interrupts him and while yesyesyes, the alpha’s cock lies heavily inside him, pressing against his walls, making Sae see stars behind his closed eyelids, he still huffs and tries grinding down on Ryusei’s dick himself. “Ryusei,” he slurs, drunk on cock and aroused pheromones, maybe fluttering his eyelashes and hugging the pillow on his chest tighter, too. Maybe he arches his back again, or bares his neck in submission as well.

He doesn’t know, doesn’t care. Everything that matters is how the alpha’s cock sits inside him.

Either way, something seems to snap in Ryusei. Whatever held him back before, whatever prevented him from not fucking into the omega ruthlessly, it’s gone now. Because from one second to the other, Ryusei growls, his inner alpha seemingly taking over, and begins moving his hips properly. Fast and precise.

Sae moans, throwing his head back instantly. He already thought the long fingers of the alpha felt good, but absolutely nothing compares to Ryusei’s dick and how it hits every right spot inside him at once. With every thrust of the alpha’s hips, it reaches deeper and further inside him, brushing spots that Sae thought would never be touched.

He feels his lower stomach tingle and lets go of the pillow with one hand to press down on it. 

His eyes roll back into his head and chokes on a moan once more when he suddenly feels his stomach bulge. Over and over. Sae whines and mewls, trashes around in the alpha’s hold, but the tight grip Ryusei has around his legs is never wavering. If anything, Ryusei tightens it more and pulls the omega even closer to himself, ensuring the helpless omega stays right where he needs to be. 

There’s no escape from this, not that Sae would’ve even dreamed of it. 

“Baby,” Ryusei gasps, and his steady rhythm stutters for a brief moment. “Princess, my omega,” he babbles and starts nuzzling his wades. “I will make you mine. I will knock you up, give you all the pups you desire,”

Sae cries and bites down on the pillow he’s already ruined with his tears and saliva. The constant slapping of skin against skin echoes through the room, mixing together with their moans and groans. Through his teary vision, Sae can make out how Ryusei blows a strand out of his face, canines briefly visible.

His inner omega howls.

“You thought I didn’t notice?” the alpha growls and snaps his hips forward quickly. Sae doesn’t understand what he’s talking about. “The way you looked at the kids playing outside the house with a longing look?” Ryusei fastens his pace, and his aroused scent thickens instantly. “I know you want to be a mother, and I will grant you that wish, yeah?” the alpha pants and Sae helplessly nods. He nods even though he doesn’t even know what Ryusei is saying but he thinks it must be right; with the way the alpha fucks him into oblivion just right.

“I will—I will knock you up as many times as you want. I will keep you pregnant for as long as you desire—shit,” Ryusei’s rhythm begins to falter and his thrusts become more desperate. “Shit, how did I survive so long without you? You’re a dream, my dream, and fuckkkk—”

With one last thrust, he pushes his dick deep inside Sae. The omega clenches around him as they both come and bites his lips as the orgasm washes over him like a flood; pulling him down into its depths. His chest is heaving and his eyes finally regain clarity. When he looks up through wet eyelashes, he sees Ryusei hovering above him, firm chest rising and falling. Toned muscles shimmering with sweat, his concentrated face flushed in a deep red as he must look down to where the two of them are connected. 

Sae swallows dryly, his throat a little hoarse. Ryusei is attractive, he’s fit and has a lot of stamina, he’s nice and caring, and oh, if only they didn’t have to part ways again after this. 

“This was amazing,” Ryusei breaks the silence at last and looks down at Sae who blankly blinks back. Touching and cupping his cheek again, the alpha smiles. “You were amazing,” he whispers and leans down to kiss him. Sae lets him, even kisses back for a moment as well.

“So what—” but the omega can’t finish whatever he was going to say because suddenly, Ryusei throws away his pillow, lifts him easily, as if he weighed nothing, and manhandles him to swap their positions. Sae yelps as he’s picked up and placed down on the alpha’s lap, dick never being pulled out of him. Ryusei’s cock twitches inside him and he flushes.

“What—what is the meaning of this?” he stammers and steadies himself by placing his hands on Ryusei’s chest. It feels as muscular and firm as it looks, and Sae finds himself mesmerized by it for a moment. He traces the outlines with his slender finger, before snapping back to reality and staring down at the alpha below him.

It’s weird. Unnatural.

“Ryusei?”

“I want you to ride me,” the alpha says, determined, and Sae widens his eyes.

“Ride…you?” he asks and shakes his head. “What nonsense are you saying?”

“I’m serious,” Ryusei retorts and tightens the grip he has on Sae’s waist, squeezing the tender flesh. “I’m not done with you yet,” he goes on and thrusts upwards to emphasize his statement. “One round isn’t enough and you can feel it, too. You’re not helplessly twitching around my knot yet,”

“Fuck, you’re so vulgar,” Sae shudders out a breath and Ryusei laughs at that. “Look who’s talking,” he giggles and begins to guide the omega’s subconscious movements.

“This is…wrong,” Sae gulps and bucks his hips, a mewl catching at the back of his throat when Ryusei’s dick hits that sensitive spot inside him again. “An omega—” he says, a tear rolling down his face, “shouldn’t look down on an alpha. Shouldn’t be in charge,”

He would much rather have Ryusei manhandle him back onto the couch. He’d much rather have the alpha press his face down and fuck him roughly without a care to make him forget. He’d much rather have the alpha make him present before thrusting into him over and over once more, instead of— whatever this is. 

“Oh, baby,” Ryusei comforts, his voice soft and gentle. “Making love is something so much more special,” he tells him but Sae doesn’t understand. This is not his place— his place is to be underneath someone and to fucked stupid. Sex is not supposed to be an act of pleasure, of passion, it’s supposed to make him pregnant so he can fulfill his life purpose as an omega. Even if it hurts. So why—?

“You deserve to feel good,” Rysei finally goes on and thumbs his cheek. Sae leans into it almost automatically; even if he hates himself for it. “Omegas and alphas are equals,” Ryusei lets his hand wander from his cheek to his neck, brushing over his flaring scent gland there. Sae wants to scoff but the way the alpha looks at him makes him swallow the snide remark back down. His throat dries.

“You’re so beautiful, do you even know that?” and there Ryusei goes again, saying things Sae doubts are actually true even if his inner omega has begun to cling to them. To trust them to be true. “So gorgeous,” Ryusei lets his hand wander over his small chest. He cups his tits. “Everything about you is so wonderful. Every part is special,” and Sae wants to cry. How often has his mother shamed him for his body? How many times has she put him down, in front of family and strangers?

“Your laugh is angelic, did you know?” The hand travels further down and Ryusei’s eyes roam over his body as if he couldn’t get enough of Sae. “And the way you talk and express yourself, gods, I missed that,” 

“Ryusei…” Sae whispers, so small because he doesn’t trust his voice anymore.

“And once you’re pregnant with my pups, you’re going to look even more beautiful. You will be such a perfect mother, so caring and loving, maybe a little strict,” Ryusei doesn’t laugh and his voice never wavers. As if he’s finally able to say all the things that have been on his mind for so long, as if he knows what to say by heart because he’s repeated the things over and over in his head before.

It makes Sae more emotional than he’d like to admit. To think an alpha thinks he’d make a good mother— after all those nights drowning himself in self-pity, after all those talks where people wanted him to bear children but never be a good parent, too. Because people don’t care about that. Don’t care if you’re unhappy, or if you maybe don’t even want children. Omegas need to conceive and bear lots of descendants for their alpha’s family because apart from that, they’re worth nothing.

“So, my angel,” Ryusei brushes his roaming hand over his hip down to his inner thigh. It lingers. “Ride me, okay?” he grins half obnoxiously confident, half genuine. “You make me so hard, do you feel my dick coming to life in you?”

“Oh my gods,” Sae barks out a short laugh. “You’re so embarrassing,” the omega rolls his eyes playfully, suddenly confident to break omega norms. Ryusei has encouraged him to show more of his personality, has told him he likes him. So it must be okay—right? And besides, the way his dick pulses inside him makes a hot pressure spread through his chest. 

It’s impossible to ignore and when Sae clenches his hole that has never stopped producing slick, he decides he has more important things to worry about right now.

To not think about that any further, however, he raises himself, so far until only the tip of Ryusei’s dick remains inside him, and sits back down on it in one go. They both groan loudly, Sae throws his head back, and Ryusei brings his hands back to his hips to grip them tightly, almost to prevent him from getting and running away from it. Keeping him in place once more.

“Fuck, honeybun,” Ryusei growls and guides Sae to raise himself again. “You can’t just do that, shit,” he curses when the omega is clenching around him again. “You’re so tight, and so warm,” Ryusei sighs. “I’m in heaven,”

“Do you ever—hng,” Sae whines. “Do you ever shut—shut up?” 

The alpha laughs but it quickly bubbles into another moan. They’re both already on edge because of their previous orgasm, everything feels too much right now. The way Ryusei’s dick somehow manages to slide even deeper inside of him, stretching his rim so nicely, filling him up so well like Sae never knew he needed. The way it tickles his insides and the way he feels a mix of cum and slick squelch out of him with every bounce.

He feels more alive than ever.

The big hands on his hips make him dizzy, too. They almost wrap around his waist entirely and the tight and guiding grip feels so possessive, Sae’s inner omega loves it— makes him purr and preen. Makes him imagine what it’s like to be manhandled by those hands. To be pushed into the mattress and fucked stupid. To be held down and have his hole fingered like earlier, maybe have his useless omega cock jerked, too, to double the pleasure—

“Ah! Ryusei!” he moans as he slams down on the alpha’s dick especially fast and hard. His breath is caught in his throat shortly and he gasps, overstimulated. “This—this—”

“Is perfect,” the alpha finishes, high on aroused pheromones and the tight warmth wrapping around his dick. “This was the best idea,” he babbles and helps Sae fasten his bounces. “Sae—Sae—” he moans, “Sae I don’t know if I will ever be able to fuck you again. I need you to ride me until the day I explode,” Ryusei goes on, eyes burning with want again. “I need to see you bouncing on it every day. I need to see your small tits jiggle every time you—”

“Shut up, shut—shut up,” Sae slaps a hand over his mouth to prevent a loud, desperate mewl from escaping past his lips. His inner omega is clawing against his ribcage; it wants the alpha’s knot desperately. His pups.

His mating bite.

Sae’s moans grow higher and quicker with every passing minute. There’s no way he’s gonna last any longer. His thighs are burning, his throat is dry from all his pathetic mewling and groaning, and his head feels as if it was stuffed with cotton to the brim. It hurts, he’s dizzy, and his vision is hazy. He hates this, he loves it, and never wants to end. He wants to feel desired forever, wants to stop thinking about reality entirely.

“Baby, Sae, Sae,” Ryusei starts chanting his name once more like a holy prayer. “Are you close?” He nods frantically, choking on another sob as tears keep streaming down his face. “Me—ahh—me, too,” the alpha tightens the grip on his hips once more and then forces Sae down one last time. 

And before the omega realizes, he’s coming all over their stomachs as Ryusei shoots his load deep inside him. Hopefully right into his womb. 

“That was…” Sae pants and leans in almost naturally by now when Ryusei gently wipes his tears away. “Intense,”

Ryusei giggles. “You mean the world’s best explosion?” he asks and Sae rolls his eyes again.

He feels dread pool in his gut almost immediately, however, the dread of the undeniable reality too apparent. Once he gets up, there’s no turning back. He will never see Ryusei again, and all the pretty compliments he received will become nothing but a mere memory. A bittersweet one for the miserable future he has yet ahead of him. 

He just wishes it was all over already.

Sae sighs through his nose—better get it done fast now, make the goodbye as easy as possible— and is just about to stand back up when he’s suddenly pulled back down. But not by Ryusei’s hands but more by…

“You…you knotted me?!” Sae shrieks and gasps when he registers the sheer size of the alpha’s knot nestled inside him, locking them together. “You—”

The omega yelps when he’s pulled forward, their chests now touching. The alpha’s bright eyes are staring right at him, their noses almost brushing against one another. “I told you I’d make you mine,” and right when Ryusei leans in to kiss him, when Sae wanted to forgive him and play it off, Ryusei’s an eager, young alpha, after all, Ryusei sinks his teeth into Sae’s scent gland.

He comes again, involuntarily, and spasms around the alpha’s knot, twitching and trembling in his strong arms. His eyes go criss-crossed as his limbs twitch helplessly.

“You’re mine, mine alone,” Ryusei licks the wound apologetically and nuzzles the side of Sae’s head with his cheek. Like a dog. Like a horny dog that lost control. 

But he holds the omega protectively until he snaps out of the mating trance, foggy vision finally clearing again.

“What have you done?” Sae asks, voice shaking. The Shidou family would kill him, and his mother would find a way to bring him back to life to kill him herself, too. “Do you even have the slightest idea of what—”

“Sae,” Ryusei interrupts him once again that day. “I’m not a stupid kid anymore,”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous,” the omega bites his lips in frustration. A mated, unwanted whore— that’s what he knows he’ll become. “I’m a maid, a useless, way older omega that…that…” he stops because he doesn’t even know what he’s getting at. He brings a trembling hand up to his neck, feels the few droplets of blood prickle against his skin. It burns nicely when he touches it. “Your family would never approve of me, and you know that. Ryusei, why did you mate me?”

“Because I love you!” the alpha exclaims and then huffs when Sae flinches at the volume. “I want…I have always loved you. Always wanted you. You’re my perfect mate, Sae, my alpha tells me that,” Ryusei runs a hand through his ruined hair and kisses away the silent tears. “I don’t care that you’re older,” he goes on. “There’s plenty of younger omegas that are forced to marry old, nasty alphas or lots of young alphas who marry older omegas. For their money but that’s beside the point,”

Ryusei pecks his lips and caresses his cheek again. Sae says nothing, just leans into the warmth again like a starved stray. “And who gives a damn about my family? They disrespect you, so they disrespect me, too. I promised I would protect you; that I would never allow someone to speak condescendingly to you ever again,”

“Ryusei,” Sae whispers but the alpha merely shakes his head.

“I keep my promises and I was never deceiving you,” he says, more than serious, and Sae swallows. Hopeful. “Come with me,” he asks the omega. “Come with me and start a family with me. Trust me, Sae. Believe me, please,”

“I don’t understand why you want someone as rotten as me,” he tells him instead.

“How could I not want such a perfect and gorgeous omega like you?” Ryusei counters and for the first time, Sae finds himself cracking a small smile. “Move to the countryside with me,” he asks again, making the omega look at him. “I know people. I know a nice house we could have,” he goes on. “It has a nice garden, too, perfect for planting stuff and—and for kids to play,”

Sae tenses.

“Please,” Ryusei then whispers. “Please, Sae, I need you. You’re my omega, yeah? If I don’t have you now, then—” 

The omega looks at him, letting his eyes roam over the alpha’s face. Ryusei has never lied to him, has never made fun of him, has never joked about things that could hurt Sae’s feelings. He wants to believe the alpha, wants to escape this hellhole of a town. His mother and his father. All the other people who he knows judge him.

“I still don’t get it,” Sae says, truthfully, and a flash of hurt crosses Ryusei’s face. “But,” he goes on and lies down on the alpha’s warm chest. He feels and hears the rapid heartbeat and smiles again. “I really want to go with you,” 

When Ryusei doesn’t answer— which is weird, since Sae expected a loud, triumphant laugh— he turns his head to look up at the alpha again. He expects everything but tears streaming down the alpha’s face. His heart skips a beat. 

“Sae,” Ryusei sniffles. “I’m so happy,” he laughs and cries at the same time. “I’m so happy I could fuck you again,”

“What happened to me only riding you?” Sae teases and Ryusei pouts. He smiles and lies back down on his chest. It’s comfortable there.

“Oh, please. As if I didn’t have you moaning around my dick during the first round,” the alpha retorts, bluntly, and Sae pinches his chest. “Ow!”

“That tongue of yours is awful,” 

“You love it though,”

“Not if my children started talking like that, too,” and Ryusei shuts up immediately. Everything feels so surreal, and he doesn’t even believe it yet. He’s mated, bonded for life, and nestled down on an alpha’s knot that has most likely impregnated him successfully with how deep it hit him. 

Sae feels his cheeks grow warm again. 

It’s quiet between them for a moment, before Sae speaks up again in the silence of the big study room. “Do you really think it will be okay?” He doesn't specify what he means but he thinks that’s obvious enough. 

“Of course,” Ryusei answers without hesitation. 

“But what about your family? Your status? Your money?”

“Fuck all of that!” the alpha tells him. “I don’t need any of those things as long as I have you by my side, my omega,” he rumbles and Sae purrs slightly. “Home is wherever you are,”

“You say that as if it’s that easy…” Sae trails off and balls his hands into fists. “They’re still your family, Ryusei,”

Maybe Sae is trying to justify his own behavior towards his parents. Maybe he tries to tell himself that he’s never stepped up because he still loved them in a sick and fucked up way instead of admitting that he’s just a coward.

The alpha shrugs and Sae’s heart sinks. “I understand your concerns, angel,” Ryusei comforts and brushes a finger over Sae’s nose, down to his lips. “But I doubt my father is keen on keeping me anywhere near him after…”

“Ryusei, what did you do?” Sae props himself up on his elbow, staring down at the alpha with wide eyes. Ryusei laughs nervously.

“I told you I hated when people put you down,” he starts and pulls Sae back down into a warm hug, massaging his scalp. “So I may have finally taken action against my father for how he talked with you earlier,” Ryusei explains. “I couldn’t just stand back and watch!” he defends quickly.

Sae blinks in confusion. “You…” he starts. “You asserted dominance towards your own father?” The words leave a bitter taste in his mouth. How many times has he wished to be able to shut his mother up? To growl and bare his teeth?

Ryusei barks a laugh. “That guy might have as well pissed himself,” he rumbles confidently. “He should be glad I was able to control my alpha, who knows what would’ve happened otherwise. My inner alpha is very protective, you know?”

Pride shimmers through Ryusei’s tone but Sae doesn’t know if he’s allowed to feel happy. He hates the head of the Shidou family, hates him for what he did to him, for how he treated him, and all the omegas working for him. A lesson like that is what he deserves, and yet—

“To be honest, it wasn’t just because of you. If that makes you feel better, princess,” Ryusei goes on, maybe sensing the spike of anxiety in Sae’s scent. “I had a lot of bottled-up emotions from my childhood, had a big grudge that only grew during the time I was away,”

Sae closes his eyes briefly. “I was worried you’d come back acting like your father,” he then admits, almost inaudible. He feels Ryusei stiffen underneath him. “You were a menace, probably still are, but you were acting the most human. You didn’t judge people based on their secondary genders, and I thought it would be a pity if they got to mend you to their will, after all.” Sae exhales. “I’m glad you’re still you. Just. Hotter and an alpha,”

“I told you I’d be your alpha, didn’t I?”

“I’m cold,” he tells Ryusei instead and almost instantly, the alpha covers him with his shirt. “Yeah, thank you,” he then says, “for everything,”

The hands in his hair continue to massage his scalp gently and lovingly. It will take a while until Ryusei’s knot deflates again and while Sae really wants to be annoyed by it, he finds to enjoy this situation. He’s warm, surrounded by the pheromones of his mate, and he can’t help but let his eyes fall shut briefly. 

Just a few minutes.

When Ryusei looks down at the omega sleeping on his chest, he smiles. Caresses the bridge of his nose carefully, before letting a finger brush over Sae’s red lips. 

Nobody will ever put you down again, and if someone still dares to put such an amazing person like you down, I will simply have to kill them.