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Bed, Bath & Beyond Ridiculous

Summary:

Annette decides to spice things up when she comes to visit her incredibly-bored boyfriend at his childhood home with a game of sexy bingo while his parents are on vacation.

When Felix is on the cusp of victory, she takes matters in her own hands to secure a consolation prize of her own to lessen the sting of defeat. That is, until his parents threaten to force a draw by coming home far too early.

Notes:

Hope you enjoy the slightly-literal interpretation of your steamy prompt. I had a bunch of fun writing this.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Standing underneath the relaxing spray of the world’s most opulent standing shower and jet tub combo money could buy, Annette couldn’t help but shake her head at the downright bizarre series of events leading to her current situation. Mostly because if she would have told her past self she’d be hiding from Felix in his parents’ ridiculously-luxe bathroom to lose in an even more ridiculous competition, she wouldn’t have believed herself.

Earlier today, she came to rescue her incredibly bored and restless boyfriend who was stuck mansion-sitting for his parents while they were on a two-week vacation with a fun little activity she planned to spice things up.

Armed with two blank bingo card printouts neatly tucked inside her day planner, the third thing she did upon arriving (the first was figuring out how the gate intercom worked and the second was kissing him within an inch of his life at the door) was requesting a tour so she could discreetly fill out the squares with mansion locations when he wasn’t looking.

Up until the very tail end of the tour, Annette prided herself on balancing the 5-by-5 cards in terms of easy versus unconventional places to fool around in. But after Felix skipped several third floor doors in a row on purpose, citing that his parents’ bedroom, on-suite bathroom, and work offices weren’t interesting enough to visit, she reconsidered her efforts to calibrate difficulty in the name of scientific discovery. Was the lure of completing a sexy bingo enough to make him reconsider those words? Science demanded that she needed to assign him the lion’s share of those rooms to test her working theory.

As luck would have it, she didn’t need to wait long to start testing as the next room he insisted on showing her was the perfect place to kick off the competition in earnest.

Given the overall masculine vibe of the mansion she’d seen up until that point, the sheer amount of girly decor goals in that room sucker punched her in the best way. There was a four-poster bed, far too many throw pillows to count, a pristine white vanity to die for, and the prettiest pastel mural of a flower garden Annette had ever laid her eyes on.

Then the week-and-six days’ worth of separation hit her like a ton of bricks the moment he laid eyes on her and purposely went in for a too-chaste kiss on the lips to whet her appetite for more. Unsurprisingly, he put up no resistance after that, practically letting her lead him to the pillow-laden bed by the pinky finger.

After making love in a slow and relaxed manner befitting a fair maiden in the dainty room, he finally noticed the printouts she left on the vanity after she’d cryptically asked him if he could cross off ‘Guest Room’ on her sheet during pillow talk.

The look on his face after he’d pieced it all together was priceless. But it also marked the last time she’d known peace.

She quickly realized soon after that an unintended consequence she didn’t account for with this game was her boyfriend’s penchant for unconventional approaches. While a normal person would see a bingo sheet and aim for the path of least resistance to win, Felix Fraldarius wantonly aimed to use his as ideas fodder, regardless of where the corresponding square was.

But the funniest thing however was that despite his complete lack of strategy, he was one away from making bingo in two different ways while all her paths to victory were all blocked by the dining room, chiefly because she’d refused to take the risk of assuming the ornate antique dining table could hold their combined weight. It was bad enough that they nearly toppled over a bookcase shelf in his family’s library when he ate her out there, breaking a table would be something she’d never live down (nevermind needing to sanitize the entire surface afterwards even if they didn’t break it).

As much as Annette didn’t consider herself a sore loser, she knew a thing or two about unsatisfying defeats. Felix would understand her need to put up a little fight to make things interesting if victory wasn’t an option and she wanted one last romp. Besides, if he couldn’t figure out that she’d pick a warm and spacious on-suite bathroom when the alternative was a cold, cramped, and downright creepy basement laundry room, he didn’t deserve his bingo.

Plus, while it was fun to have her fill of adventurous places and positions, she longed to turn off her brain and revel in simple anticipation. The only problem was, the amount of time she was waiting was starting to tread into ‘doctors and dentists taking their sweet time to greet you’ territory and as much as she liked being clean, she didn’t want to turn into a prune because her ‘I’m pretending to not care by doing something else’ shower ran for too long.

Accepting that reverse psychology wouldn’t work on her stubborn boyfriend, she reached down to press down the faucet knob to stop the flow of the water coming through the shower head but didn’t stop the water entirely. Instead, she inserted the plug in the drain to start filling the enormous tub.

If she was going to accept defeat and wait far too long on top of that, she was going to make the most of things. And in this fancy, hotel-like bathroom with a sliding door, fluffy bathrobes and low-pile towels hanging off the long wall’s hooks, heated mirror with an embedded digital clock, and a glass shower partition in lieu of regular curtains, that meant taking advantage of what they couldn’t do at home.

During her shower, Annette had noticed two things as she was taking in her immediate surroundings.

The first was that the tub was large enough to easily accommodate two people.

The second was that his mother must have loved her floral smells just as much as her floral decor because all the body care products on the tub’s shelf were hibiscus and clove scented, including a full bottle of bubble bath Annette absolutely needed to try out the moment she laid eyes on it.

In fact, she reached for that very bottle right now to add a healthy amount under the stream of running water (she rationalized her actions by making a mental note to send Mrs Fraldarius double the amount of replacement bottles later).

If Felix wanted his victory, he’d have to claim it in a bubble bath with her. It would be way too slippery and he’d probably complain about that the entire time but she knew she could still find a way to convince him. She always could.

Well, that was assuming the tub would even fill fast enough. She doubted Felix would humor her if she exited the confines of the shower when the countertop was the perfect height and size to claim her there. But it would look kind of silly if she were to idly stand in the shower because the glass partition didn’t fog up much no matter how hot she ran the water.

Wait. That gave her an idea.

What if she gave him an eyeful to lure him in like a modern day siren?

She had time to kill and, if she was being completely honest with herself, there was something… strangely appealing about being walked in on doing something intimate in a safe environment. She was also so curious about how he’d respond to seeing her get a head start on having a little fun too.

Oh yes, that sounded like a delightfully spicy win-win scenario, she thought as the telltale throb between her thighs took over any rational thought and cemented the decision for her.

Annette turned to face the glass partition, starting small by fondling her breasts to deepen this feeling. Doing this out in the open felt slightly unnatural at first, so she closed her eyes. She imagined his initial double take, the way his lips slightly parted from the wind knocked out of his sails, and some curse word muttered underneath his breath. As she found her rhythm picturing different scenarios, every tweak, roll, and pinch pooled more heat in her lower belly, amplified by the knowledge that there was no hiding how turned on she was already between her flushed face, perky nipples and the way she couldn’t stop mindlessly canting her hips against nothing.

It didn’t take long before she opened eyes, too hot and bothered to care about being self-conscious anymore. Raw need forced her to lean a palm against the glass for stability as her other hand drifted south to rub tight circles around her nub. With every circular motion, her body sang from the contact as the pleasant thrum from her core bloomed stronger and further. A low, long-drawn moan escaped her lips only for it to get drowned out by the thundering water filling the tub.

No, that wouldn’t do. He needed to hear her. But she also needed more bubbles to make her dreams come true too.

Glancing over to the main dial to control the water, she noticed a smaller one underneath, presumably for the jets. Hm. Maybe that could help speed things up, she mused as she leaned over to crank it all the way before her aching clit cried for her full attention once more.

To her delight, the extra motion of the pulsing jets seemed to do the trick to make the bubbles rise exponentially higher and higher around her as the tub’s water level rose to the top of her shins. Equal parts curious and horny, she crouched down in front of the closest jet to see how it would feel against her—

A louder moan escaped her, this one less muffled by the water. The strong pulsing water against her sex felt so good. She could stay down here forever. But…if she… if she… wasn’t careful she was going to…going to…

“—Annette?” she heard Felix call out from the other side of the door, simultaneously yanking her out of her lusty haze and making her heart skip a beat. His voice was like a bucket of cold water doused over her head. She needed to slow down, she concluded, forcing herself to get up.

“I’m just bathing,” she eventually called out, aiming for a casual, breezy tone to mask her nerves as she turned off the faucet before moving back to face the partition. This was it, she thought, no turning back now. “Come in.”

Once the door slid open with a slight whine, reality was far better than the fantasy scenarios she played in her mind. He wasn’t taken by surprise like he was in her imagination, his hungry expression and amber eyes darkened with want told her an entirely different story even before her gaze drifted to the folded bingo card in his hand.

Just bathing?”

“Yes,” she thickly said as she resumed rubbing slow circles to test the waters. Goddess, she was so close already. “Here to claim your victory?”

While she could barely hear his breath hitch, he stood preternaturally still in the way he often did when something had his full attention. The only other real movement she could spy was the apple of his throat bobbing up and down, swallowing hard.

“Yes,” he said in a low timbre, clearing the threshold to slide the door closed behind him. After setting aside the card on the counter, he gave her a wolfish grin before pulling his navy henley over his head. “You should have waited for me.”

“I know,” she acknowledged as her eyes fluttered shut. She leaned forward just enough for her breasts to lightly press against the glass, increasing the pace of her ministrations to satisfy the deepening throb. Mmm, this was intoxicating. “But I couldn’t stop. It feels too good.”

He took several steps forward to get close enough to notice the outline of his own arousal pressing against his jeans. “Show me how good before I show you better.

Annette nodded, her breath too choppy and mind too clouded by desire to string words together into an intelligible response. The combination of delicious friction and consensual voyeurism left her dripping wet but unforgivably empty. She slipped two fingers inside of herself and started vigorously pistoning them in and out of her pussy to start correcting that problem.

Fuck,” he groaned.

Yes, oh yes, this power trip was just what she needed. Especially when her too-small hands hit the right tension point of exquisite torture by not going deep enough at the right angle to hit the magical rough patch that always made her see stars. Not like the cock she was greedily eying would.

Instead she took perverse delight in seeing it strain more and more against his pants the closer he got. She wanted his breaking point. She wanted him to feel like he’d lost even though he won. To watch him be completely transfixed by the naughty things she was doing was already on another level. She bet she could make him come in his pants if she wasn’t careful.

But Annette was oh so careful. Careful enough to not send herself over the edge by going too fast even though her body hungered to hit nirvana. When she dared to take her fingers out and planted that hand firmly against the glass to stave off her building climax, coating the surface in her come. Her needy whimper from the sudden emptiness echoed around the bathroom in a way her earlier moans had not.

It’s also what broke him.

To his credit, it was a calm and collected break, one pleasing to the eyes. He didn’t trip over himself to undress, no, he looked her dead in the eye and gave her a knowing look as he slowly unbuttoned his jean button and slid down the zipper. The deliberately unhurried tempo was powerful. She was thankful for it later when it allowed her to savor the little show of his cock springing free at full attention as he lowered his pants and boxer-briefs past his narrow hips. She licked her lips in anticipation at how hard he was already. She did that.

It wasn’t long after he opened the glass door and joined her. To Annette’s surprise, he didn’t make some pithy remark about the mountain of bubbles covering every inch of the water’s surface as he zeroed in on her, gripping her hips roughly to pull her against him while he left lovebites against the dip of her neck. No, she didn’t particularly mind this one bit, she thought as his hard length pressed against the small of her back.

“Did you get distracted?” he asked between wet kisses.

No,” she said, grinding against him. “I wanted to have bubble baaaaah!

Her villain boyfriend cut off her sentence with a multi-pronged attack against her swollen clit and one of her sensitive nipples with his fingers, holding her in place as his mouth travelled to her nape.

“Not like this?” he teased.

“Ngh-no….” she mewled. Goddess, he was testing her. “Bubble bath sex or no bingo. We can have shower sex anytime.”

“You drive a hard bargain,” he said, chuckling into her skin before he loosened his tight grip on her. When she turned around to face him, Felix reverently kissed the top of her head and tenderly brushed a droplet of water away from her cheek. “Will you be alright if we have to take it slower?”

Before Annette could nod in agreement, a weird chime emanated from the depths of the nearby clothing pile startled her.

“What was that?”

“Security notification. It goes off every time the gates open.” he tersely answered. “Annette?”

Her stomach dropped at the way he said her name. This was bad news. She could feel it in her bones.

“Yes?”

“We have 7 minutes before my parents walk in on us,” he told her solemnly. “I can buy us more time if you wait here in the bath. I’ll make it up to you after. Promise.”

“Felix, wait.” Thankfully, she was able to stop him in his tracks before he moved a muscle. “Let’s have a quickie against the wall first. I’ll keep quiet.”

Her suggestion earned her a hard blink.

“Uh, pardon?”

“I’m not letting you leave here like this.” she explained, tracing along his length from his base to tip for emphasis. “I know whatever you’re going to do is going to be embarrassing enough. I don’t want to add to that when it’s my fault you’re so hard.”

“Annette, I… fuck. Never mind. You’re right.”

Just when she thought he’d start lining up his dick with her entrance to get things started, he turned to the side and grabbed a handful of bubbles instead and stuck them on top of her head like a hat.

“Um, Felix? What’s this for?”

“Making this a bubble quickie,” he explained as he motioned for her to wrap her hands and legs around him. “I wanted to make it up to you since I know this isn’t what you want.”

“No, you’re right, it isn’t,” she agreed with a giggle as she took a few bubbles off her head to put some on his right before sinking herself nicely onto his cock. “But it’s what I need.

When his eyes widened and nostrils flared at her statement, Annette instantly accepted she was a goner once the pleasant stretch took hold and he immediately started hitting all the right spots within her as he set a brutal pace to come quickly in a race against the clock. It was a miracle they didn’t break the glass. Or that Felix spilled his seed into her when he did for that matter.

Not even a moment after he hopped out of the shower and grabbed a fluffy bathrobe to wear and she turned off the jets, Annette heard a pair of voices growing louder and louder.

Once Felix dashed out of the room, all Annette could do in the darkness was strategically place bubble tufts around her for cover and hope for the best.

It didn’t take long to come to the conclusion that regardless if he was successful, she was the most ridiculously lucky girl in the world.

Emphasis on ridiculous.

Notes:

Good news: Felix managed to get his parents to turn back around, no questions asked about the wet hair and bathrobe. Annette got the lovey dovey bubble bath sesh of her dreams.

Bad news: His mother started making thinly-veiled jokes about how all Fraldarius men were the same when it came to bubble baths. Rodrigue expressed disappointment that they didn't go for their creepy basement laundry room. It could have used a good cleaning like the rest of the rooms.