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Nagito had finally become content with his life after the Despair breakout. He had settled down, gotten married and could finally calm down and just take it easy, that was until Makoto broke the news to him that day, he remembered it clearly. He was sitting on the sofa, watching something on the T.V when Makoto practically bounced into the room. Nagito looked over at his husband with a big smile, anything that made Makoto this happy made him happy, or well he thought that would always be the case.
“Look at you, bouncing with excitement” Nagito chuckled dryly as he turned all his attention to his beloved. Makoto had a huge grin on his face as he quickly rushed over to Nagito and throws himself onto the couch beside him.
“You won’t believe it! It’s just our luck!” Makoto squealed, his feet tapping on the ground as he shoved his hand into his pocket and rummaged around, Nagito raised a brow as he watched Makoto who pulled something out of his pocket and holds it out “Look, Nagito!” Makoto exclaimed, moving closer as he grabbed one of the white haired mans arm and holds it in front of his face.
Nagito’s smile dropped to an expression of shock, eyes wide and mouth open. He just stared. Makoto was biting down on his lip excitedly, trying to not scream the house down with happiness.
“Is. . . is that?” Nagito’s voice was hushed and horsed, the shock evident. Makoto nodded, giggling happily.
“Mhm! Look, two lines!” Makoto pointed out, moving it closer to Nagito’s face to show him “I’m pregnant!” Nagito hesitantly takes the pregnancy test and stared at it. He just stared at it, his gray-green eyes focused on those god damn red lines. . .
“. . .ah, I- I see- it really is. . .” Nagito responded, giving him a nervous grin. Makoto was clearly too excited to notice as he pulled the test close to his chest and kicked his legs while giggling.
“Honey, I’m so excited!” Makoto exclaimed excitedly, giggling as he leaned against the taller man’s arm “We’re so lucky!” Makoto added, smiling at the chest. Nagito nodded and rested his head on Makoto’s soft chestnut brown hair, staring at the wall.
“Yeah. . .lucky” Nagito mumbled, doubt already beginning to swarm his mind. . .
Now here he sat, at Makoto’s bedside in the hospital while he slept, clearly exhausted due to the stress he had just put his body through. Nagito sat there silently, watching him sleep.
Nagito was zoned out, trying to process everything as Makoto rested, he takes a deep breath and sighed heavily as he rested his elbows on his knees, his chin on his interlocked hands. His mind was racing with the fear of now raising a child. Komaru, Kyoko, Toko, Byakuya as well as Byakuya and Kyoko’s six-month-old daughter, Himawari were in the room with them. Nagito didn’t bother to contact anyone he knew, he didn’t want to. They could meet the baby at another time.
The voices close to him was all background noise, Komaru’s excited rambling, Kyoko and Byakuya’s calm conversation about how long it’s been since they seen Makoto sleep with ease and Toko’s nervous chuckles at her wife’s excited display.
Nagito is aware he’s a fucked-up person, it’s not like he’d avoid the fact he is. He’s mentally messed up, not to mention physically weak and not the most attractive person alive, he was shocked Makoto even wanted him since he’s like a walking corpse, extremely skinny, pale and sickly, wheezing hard when he laughed and the fact he had come to terms his old behaviour was. . .very creepy to say none the less. He looked like a creep. That’s what many people say about him.
Makoto on the other hand, Nagito couldn’t believe someone so beautiful, both inside and out wanted him. . .his eyes raked over Makoto’s features, from his soft chestnut brown hair, tanned, freckle covered skin. . .and those Hazel eyes when their open, big and shimmering with happiness.
Makoto was the light of life, too good for him. He grimaced as his mind fills with self-deprecating thoughts, it’s been a long time since he’s thought anything like this. . . he felt so useless right now, lost. . . what was he meant to do? What if the nurse was wrong and the birth was too harsh for Makoto and he died? It would be Nagito’s fault! He was the one who accidently got him pregnant! Nagito gritted his teeth, grinding them against one another anxiously.
“Mr. Komaeda?” Nagito snapped out of his daze, sitting up straight to look at the nurse, holding a small bundle wrapped in a Sherbet yellow blanket “Your daughter is all cleaned up, nice and healthy!” She smiled at him, Nagito tensed up staring at his daughter. . . it still felt so foreign him “Would you like to hold her?” the nurse asked, holding her out.
Nagito remained tensed, staring at the small bundle. Komaru was grinning ear to ear, glancing between her niece and brother-in-law. Nagito forced and smile and puts his hands up in a defensive manner.
“T-that’s not the best idea, I’m very clumsy, I’d be afraid I’d drop her!” Nagito says, making up an excuse to avoid holding his own baby. Kyoko raised a brow at him in a confused manner, Komaru put her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes, the nurse seemed taken aback.
“Nagito! That’s your daughter!” Komaru huffed, Toko stood behind her and fixed her glasses while biting down on her bottom lip. Kyoko looked over at her husband, who shrugged. Byakuya seemed as confused as his wife “Hold her!” Komaru demanded, wagging a finger at him. Nagito shakes his head no.
“Knowing my luck, she’d slip outta my hands right onto her head!” Nagito responded “and- shouldn’t Makoto be the first to hold her? He did give birth to her!” Nagito added, clearly trying to get out of holding the baby anyway possible “or- or maybe you could hold her! She’ll probably love her Auntie Komaru!” Nagito says, smiling at her with a nervous grin.
Komaru shakes her head and turned to the nurse and puts her arms out to her to take her niece. The nurse hands the baby girl over to the green haired woman who happily takes her and smiled.
“Hiya baby! I’m your Auntie Komaru! And this is your Auntie Toko!” Komaru cooed, Toko leaned over with a small smile.
“S-she looks just- l-like Makoto!” Toko pointed out, poking the baby’s cheek “She’s- so- soft” She added, Kyoko smiled fondly as she leaned over to admire the baby’s rosy, plump cheeks. She definably does get that baby fat look from Makoto for sure.
Byakuya walked over to Nagito while the woman where busy with the baby, he stared at him before sighing and sitting in the chair next beside him, Himawari on his knee with her little head snuggled against her father’s chest and sucking on her small fist.
“Nagito.” Byakuya firmly, looking at him “Why don’t you want to hold the damn baby?” he asked bluntly, Nagito blinked, looking at him nervously.
“I- it’s n-not that I don’t wanna-” Nagito blurted out, looking away and rubbing the back of his neck “I just-. . .she won’t like me” Nagito sighed, looking at his feet “I’m so- cold and creepy looking and- I mean, I’m gonna be a horrible father” Nagito chuckled dryly as he shakes his head.
Byakuya stared at him before taking a deep breath before exhaling in annoyance. He sits there and looked at Makoto who’s snoring quietly. Byakuya, against his will puts a hand on Nagito’s shoulder.
“Look. I get it.” Byakuya says, he’s doing this for Makoto’s state, not Nagito’s. He doesn’t really like him but Makoto is his best friend. . .so he’s gotta do something “When Kyoko gave birth to our daughter, Himawari. . .I had the same doubts.” Byakuya said, looking at his daughter who’s curiously looking around while resting her head against his chest, he kept his arm securely around her. “You’ll worry about these things but you just have to try, my father was emotionally distant, so I’m working on being the opposite but I’m better than him, so it’s not hard.” Byakuya says, patting his shoulder “and Makoto will help you. He’ll guide you through it so stop bitching and whining and hold your child.” Byakuya states firmly, pulling his hand away from Nagito’s shoulder.
Nagito looked back at Makoto, looking at his husband once more. Byakuya had a point. He takes a deep breath before looking over at the girls. Kyoko was now holding his daughter and admiring the cute new-born.
“Can. . .can I actually- uh- have. . .her now?” Nagito piped up, Kyoko looked at him and nodded, her heels clicking as she walked over and carefully placed the new-born into her father’s arms carefully. Nagito could feel his anxiety spike as he looked at the tightly wrapped bundle.
Nagito felt his breath stop, the weight in his arm’s slightly moved as she made small noises, her little eyes open up. Her eyes the same gray-green colour as himself but they had that same spark Makoto’s did. Nagito just stared at her, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open, he adjusted her in his robotic arm and moved his human hand to the top of her head and run it over her tuft of chestnut brown hair. She was staring up at Nagito with curious eyes, Nagito moved his hand to touch her face with the back of his bony, cold hand and ran it down her chubby tanned cheek. He remained quiet, saying nothing as he moves that hand to behind her head again and admired her little face and slowly began smiling.
“H-hey. . .hello there.” Nagito says faintly as he smiled at her, he rocked her softly back and forth in his arms, he didn’t realize his smile was getting bigger and bigger as he stared at her, he chuckled a little as his eyes began to water, he didn’t even realize as tears began falling down his face as he sniffled, staring at the small bundle of joy in his arms. His hands shake as he gently swayed her side to side “Aren’t you just. . .so precious. . .” He whispered to her, happy tears dropped down his face as he held her close and secure, afraid he’d drop the precious cargo in hand.
Makoto’s eyes slowly opened as he made a small groan, the first thing he’s greeted with is his husband holding their daughter which all it does is make him smile. Makoto slowly sits up in the bed and rubbed his eyes, he had pretty much fainted from the shock of the birth and hadn’t gotten the chance to hold the baby yet. Nagito looked up from the baby when he noticed Makoto’s movement from the corner of his eye.
“How is she?. . .” Makoto asked, his voice dry and horsed as he looked at his husband and their baby girl. Nagito smiled at him and slowly stood up, sniffling as he walked over and sits on the edge of the bed to show her little face to his beloved.
“Healthy and happy.” Nagito responded happily, showing him the baby. Nagito hands their daughter to Makoto, giving her to him. Makoto just grinned, happily holding his daughter to his chest as he leaned back against the cousins, his head against Nagito’s shoulder, Nagito rested his own head upon Makoto’s.
“She’s perfect” Makoto says, holding her close to his chest, stroking her head. Kyoko smiled at Byakuya and nods towards the door, he gives her a look of acknowledgment before walking towards the door, getting Komaru and Toko to come with them to give the new parents some privacy.
“What should we call her?” Nagito asked quietly, looking down at Makoto as he moved his hand up to the brunette’s hair and began running his hand through it. Makoto smiled widely.
“Nozomi.” Makoto says, looking at his husband before down at their daughter “It means hope. . .” Makoto finished as he stroked the baby’s hair, who had fallen asleep happily against her dad’s chest.
“Nozomi. . .I love it.” Nagito chuckled as he kisses Makoto’s hair before pulling him closer to him, an arm around both Makoto and Nozomi, holding them both close. Suddenly, the doubt he was feeling less then half an hour ago is gone.
He was peaceful and content.