Chapter Text
Georjge Cooper Sr. grunted hard, SWEATY old man cheeks flush to the cold white porcelain of his toilet. More painful grunts erupted from between his grit teeth, forehead slick with sweat. A big fat smelly shit started spreading his tight ring of muscle down below, the hard and rough turd causing his gut to feel immense pain. His left hand gripped the counter next to him, as his hairy toes curled.
“Geoge! You better be ready to leave mister, we have to leave for church now,” A feminine voice called from outside the bathroom door. His wife, Mary…
When they first got married, he felt as if he were the luckiest man alive. Nowadays their marriage was devoid of love. He quickly found himself overwhelmed by her passion for church, women’s basketball, and her fetish for having him handcuff himself to a wooden board with a hole for his head and throwing tomatoes at him.
“Shut the fuck up bitch im SHITTING. Take the kids yourself you ugly whore.” Jorjgh said to her lovingly. Mary bursted into tears at his harsh words (which slightly aroused him) and left, incoherently sobbing something about the end of days at the mighty tentacle-hand of Cthulhu.
The confusion caused his sphincter to dilate further, allowing his stuck shit to fall out, violently plopping into the water and splashing shit water all over his cheeks.
Looking down as he prepared to wipe himself, he inspected his genitals. Was it just him or was his pp shrinking..? Oh well he’d go see a specialist about that later after he gets the money from the casino. He grabbed a thick wad of toilet paper and rubbed it in between his cheeks. He aggressively slid it between them like he was doing the Among Us card swipe task, until he suddenly felt something crawling on his finger.
Thinking he accidentally got some of his dark brown goodness on his finger he put it up to his face to inspect it then perhaps lick it if it looked tasty enough, he was surprised to see a collection of small bugs on his finger.
Was that.. Oh god did he have.. Lice??? On his ASS???Suddenly, the toilet bowl below him shifted. He felt the air pressure under his dirty bum shift, and he leaped off the toilet in a stunning display of acrobatics for a fat texan man. Before him, a head and neck was sticking out of the bowl, with two machine guns mounted on the side.
“What– what the he-”
“SKIBIDI BOP BOP DOP YES YES!!!!!!!!”
As the machine guns started to whirr, signifying an incoming hail of bullets that would surely shred him, an interdimensional portal opened up from behind Gourge coper. He felt the brief sensation of fur on his neck before he was pulled in and shoved behind cover. A hooded woman in what looked like a maid outfit under her unzipped jacket rushed out from behind them, swiftly pulling down her pants and using her extremely elongated clitoris as a lasso. The clit rope wrapped around the Skibidi Toilet’s neck, strangling it violently until it fell limp, though Hgrogjhe couldn’t tell if it was from the strangulation or the unbearable fishy stink.
The lady stepped back into the portal, and the furry man that held him gently closed the portal. In sync, they pulled down their hoods.
“Who are you….????” Geog confusedly asked in a confused manne,r.
“I am Nicelangelo Wilde…..” Said the furry fox man, who looked depressed and like he hadn’t slept in days.
“And i….. Am Celincestia ludenbegr.” said the maid dress weird looking woman with a stitch across her forehead.
“And we…. Are the resesntince……”
CHAPTER 1 END!!!!?!?1111111!!11!!!!!!!!