Archive of Our Own

As Sanemi dashed past the enemy, there was no thought as he sliced the demon’s head off. Scowling when he sees a cut running on his forearm, he didn’t see when the demon had scratched him. He should’ve been training harder. Still, he found it no trouble slowing down the bleeding with his breathing.

“You know, Kanae gonna throw a riot when she knows you got hurt,” a voice interrupts. “She would tell you to be careful. Right, little brother?” A black-haired slayer walks forward, ruffling the boy’s white hair.

“I’m not your little brother, Kumeno,” the younger growls. Still, Kumeno smiles, his smile never falters against the brash responses. “Oh, come on, Sanemi, you know you can call me Masachika, or even big brother.”

Sanemi’s scowl grows. “Never.” Masachika grins brightly. “Never say ‘never’, little brother, because your big brother is–” Sanemi doesn’t pay attention, only walking off.

A part of Sanemi expected Masachika to continue to follow, but there was no sound behind him. Sanemi stops. Masachika was never silent. He was always filled with energy. When he turns his head, he sees no one is behind him. A sudden rush of anxiety rushes through his senses.

“Masachika?”

He wanted to grit his teeth and shout. “Masachika, this isn’t funny!” This was so familiar. As if he could hear her voice again, mocking him, telling him how she knows so much of his misery.

She’s dead.

The former Lower Rank One is dead.

She’s dead?

Sanemi’s mind rushes. When did she die? As he moved his hands to grip his hair, there’s an unsettling voice behind him, grasping his shoulders tightly.

“Why do you get to live while we die?”

When he turns around, he sees Kanae and Masachika standing there. Blood coated Kanae’s clothing, her butterfly haori was battered and destroyed, her uniform did nothing to hide the gaping wounds, showing her lungs and organs. How she was sliced by a golden fan from what their crows had shared. While Masachika’s eyes looked lifeless, filled with hatred as blood poured from his head wound.

They were taking steps towards him, letting out small sounds of agony as if any breath they took was agonizing to them.

“No…” Sanemi tried to step back.

And yet he couldn’t when he slips behind. He falls. He doesn’t know how far he falls as he feels as if he’s drowning.

Then he’s awake.

Sanemi was panting heavily, grasping the covers. His inner panic was shoved away by the beckoning calls coming from his crow. Forcing down the emotions he was feeling, as if he wasn’t woken up by the daily night terrors.

“MISSION! MISSION FOR THE WIND HASHIRA!” Sorai was perched by the open shoji. Exhausted lavender eyes focus on his crow as it hops inside. Sanemi doesn’t need to ask as it begins to talk.

“Your presence is required in the small village up north, known as Kizu. The villagers are plagued by a demon capable of killing thirty civilians as well as ten slayers…” As his crow continued to explain, Sanemi had tuned him out. His mind trailed off when he heard the name.

A distant memory when Masachika had mentioned his hometown, calling it Kizu. How everyone in his village referred it as such because of the suffering and anguish that came from living in the area. It was much colder as it was more reclusive. He doesn’t know the geological area of the location, but he knows his crow will guide him.

His fists tightened.

There was a part of him that wanted to reject this mission. Even with Masachika’s death being years ago, it never left him. Now, he’s being sent to fulfill a mission at Masachika’s hometown.

Pushing himself off the futon, he looks to Sorai. “Show me the way, Sorai.” Soon, it hits him that he cut the crow off as it wasn’t finished explaining. However, Sanemi has heard enough. He’ll be taking this mission. He’ll kill whatever demon decided to show its filthy claws.

As he rushed off, he couldn’t shake off the unsettling feeling that something was wrong. He ignores it. He has no time for his personal feelings.

Finish the mission.

At the Stone Hashira estate, Genya wasn’t too surprised to see Tanjiro, Kanao, Inosuke, and Zenitsu walking up the trail. He was busy training and doing minor chores while the Stone Hashira was off on a mission. A part of him feels bad for whatever demon had the misfortune to cross paths with Gyomei.

“Genya!” Tanjiro gleams. “Did you receive the mission report?” Genya nods his head. He’s surprised that Tanjiro is happy about the sudden arrangement considering what happened during the Hashira training exercises. He hasn’t seen his Nemi since then. His brother has been keeping his space.

Tanjiro adjusted the box on his shoulders. Nezuko was nestled comfortably inside, completely hidden from the sun.

“Yes, I heard. I was surprised the master allowed us to work with Aniki, considering everything,” Genya waves his hand around. Zenitsu grits his teeth. “I think he just wants us gone to have us work with that lunatic–I mean incredible person.” Zenitsu changed his last few words as he heard Genya’s heart quicken, spiking in anger.

“I’m ready to beat the wind guy,” Inosuke says, a menacing laughter coming from him. Kanao only offers a small smile. She didn’t mind working with the Wind Hashira. He isn’t rude to her, considering she’s Kanae’s little sister. Sanemi harbored no ill towards her.

“I’m excited as well,” Kanao finally says.

Genya offers a smile to his friends. He’s glad he’s met them. Even with their missions keeping them busy, and Muzan being a little M.I.A at the moment, it felt nice to just relax. A part of him wonders if he’ll be able to talk to his brother. Even after the whole ‘trying to blind you’ accident, Tanjiro reassured him that his brother doesn’t hate him.

Zenitsu scowls, crossing his arms. His inner panic was down for now. He wants to leave, but he knows he can’t.

“Then let’s get going,” Tanjiro says, clasping his hands. The five slayers, plus Nezuko, walked down the path as they knew the journey would be a two-day trip.

So, when everyone was resting on the first day, Genya focused his eyes on the burning flames. He was unable to sleep.

“You can’t sleep?”

Genya shrugs, “It’s my nerves. I can’t really rest.” It goes unspoken that tomorrow they’ll be meeting the Wind Hashira. He’ll be able to see his Nemi again. Still, it goes through him, festering horribly that his brother would tell him to leave, not giving him a chance.

Or worse, another fight would break out.

“Genya,” Tanjiro interrupts his inner turmoil. Genya sees Tanjiro’s gentle gaze as he has Nezuko nestled on his lap. “Can you tell me about your big brother?” Genya shouldn’t be surprised, but he appreciated the kind gesture. A small smile glosses his face.

“My Aniki is the strongest person I know. When we were younger, he used to shield me from bullies. We weren’t well liked in the village because of strange appearances as well as our father.” Tanjiro noticed the change in Genya’s scent, resentment. Still, it wavers. “Aniki had white hair while all of us had black hair. Our dad didn’t help with the rumors, saying my mom had slept with another. Even with others saying we weren’t related, Aniki told me he didn’t care what others said.”

Genya grew somber. “A part of me wonders if he had doubts. A part of me wondered if he would leave us if he wasn’t related to us, but Aniki shut that down the day the bullies were beating on me. He protected me as they were telling him why would he protect someone he wasn’t related to? But Aniki told them that it didn't matter, because no matter what he was going to look after me and my younger siblings because he loved us. Nothing would change that.”

Tanjiro felt tears in his eyes. It was strange to hear these stories about the Wind Hashira. His personality from then contrasts against the personality Sanemi showed now.

Still, there was a salty scent, one so familiar. He looked at Genya to see his friend wiping his tears.

“Genya, are you–?”

Genya cuts him off, promptly. “I’m okay…just sometimes I miss those times.” Tanjiro knew how that felt. Some days, he wished he could live in the memories of when his siblings and Mom were alive. He runs his hand through Nezuko’s hair. His baby sister only snuggled close.

“I know how it feels,” Tanjiro finally answers.

Without even needing to ask, Genya knew what Tanjiro meant. He won’t pry into Tanjiro’s past. If he wasn’t ready to share, then he’ll wait. For now, the two enjoyed each other’s company, even if it was in silence.

On the second day, Tanjiro and Kanao had to stop Inosuke from fighting Zenitsu over the last fish. Genya would shake his head. He was surprised that Inosuke hasn’t focused his attention on him. Usually, they would be fighting. However, he did argue with Zenitsu about a few things he’s not willing to discuss.

“I’m just saying–”

“Not listening,” Genya says, shortly, cutting Zenitsu off. However, before they could continue. Genya notices Zenitsu stop, narrowing his eyes. Tanjiro seems to notice, glancing at him. “Is everything okay, Zenitsu?”

Zenitsu glares, “Tanjiro, can you smell?” The question alone had everyone on high alerts. “Because I can’t hear anything other than the normal sounds.” As if something was nulling his hearing. Tanjiro lifted a finger to touch his nose as he took a sniff. He stops.

“I…I can’t smell either.”

“Welcome to Kizu,” Kanao reads off, gazing at the sign in front of them. Despite the massive forest surrounding them, the air felt tighter. Inosuke didn’t seem fazed.

“Let’s go, Monjiro and Underlings!” Inosuke stomps forward with his swords out, prepared for anything that even dares to try and stop him. Genya seemed a little hesitant, but he followed behind. He’s determined to see his Aniki. Tanjiro follows behind, holding Nezuko’s box.

Zenitsu gasps, “D-Don’t you see how spooky this place is!?” He follows behind, not wanting to be left alone.

White hair wasn’t hard to spot when everyone else had dark, raven hair. Even with his sense of smell being damped, Tanjiro knew it wouldn’t be hard to find the Wind Pillar. Still, there was something awful about this village. An ominous feeling followed the group.

“I see Mr. Shinazugawa,” Kanao finally says. Genya immediately tenses up as he sees his Aniki. Sanemi was by one of the small shops with Sorai flocking around him, tugging at Sanemi’s shirt to try and urge him away. Still, Sanemi didn’t seem to pay his crow any attention.

Tanjiro puffed up his chest, wanting to greet the Hashira, but it seemed Inosuke beat him to it.

“Pillar guy! Fight me!” Inosuke rushes for Sanemi. With one glance at them, Sanemi scowls, knocking Inosuke down before he could even get into his space. The others were following closely behind.

As much as Sanemi wanted to ask why they were here, he knew the answer after Sorai explained that his backup was going to arrive soon. He should’ve listened earlier, and yet, it wasn’t going to stop him from arriving.

“I apologize for Inosuke’s behavior,” Tanjiro begins. “Thank you for letting us join you!” Tanjiro’s smile grows bright. Scoffing, the Wind Hashira would’ve turned his back before settling his gaze on Kanao.

“Does Kocho know you’re here?” Sanemi crosses his arms. He knew how capable the youngest butterfly sister could be. All the butterflies were a force to be reckoned with. He wouldn’t look down on them. Kanae was one of the strongest people he knew. In a way, it reminded him of his mother’s strength. She may have been small, but she was strong.

That’s why he never looked down on Shinobu, even if she was unable to cut a demon’s head off, she made up for it in smarts. For Kami’s sake, she created a poison lethal to demons and became a Hashira.

Kanao looked hesitant before answering. “No, my sis–Master doesn’t know,” quickly she changed the last words of her answer. Sanemi narrowed his eyes before sighing. It shouldn’t surprise him that she didn’t inform Shinobu. It goes without saying that Shinobu was protective.

Considering she almost beat up Uzui for trying to abduct the other butterfly girls, or when Uzui smacked Aoi’s behind. It was amusing to see Uzui afraid of a girl much shorter than him.

Still, Sanemi glances at the others. The boar guy kept wanting to pick a fight with him. The yellow-haired boy looked like a wimp. He shifts his gaze away from his younger brother. He won’t acknowledge Genya’s presence, and then there was Tanjiro Kamado and his demon sister.

He cools his boiling anger. Mitsuri had explained during the attack at the Swordsmith village that the two proved to be helpful in defeating the Upper Rank 4. For now, he’ll keep his peace unless they choose to piss him off.

“Mr. Shinazugawa, do you know what’s going on?” Kanao wasn’t used to speaking often, but it benefited them all if she spoke to the Wind Hashira. “Tanjiro’s crow only explained the death count.”

Sanemi turns his back, beginning to walk. He didn’t say anything as they began to follow. A part of them wonders what’s happening, before the Hashira stops in front of a lake, fog clouding the water as it remained still. However, just as they looked, Tanjiro covered his nose. He didn’t need his skillful nose to smell the copper stench that came from the water.

Swinging his sword, Sanemi reveals the bodies in the water. That’s why the village seemed so empty. The villagers were all dead. The decaying bodies of slayers were in the water.

“A demon is driving people to kill themselves,” Sanemi explains. “There’s no life in this lake, not even a single animal in the surrounding forest.” Sanemi had arrived here two days earlier, searching endlessly for anyone or anything. He can’t even locate the demon.

As they stare at the dead corpses, Sanemi turns his head to face them. He sees the horror in their eyes, except for Kanao and Inosuke, who was wearing the mask. He tsks. “If you can’t stomach this, then you should leave.” He walks away from the massacre.

Still, he’s stopped by Tanjiro.

“Why haven’t you given them a proper burial? These are innocent lives lost and our former comrades,” Tanjiro tries. “Tanjiro–” Genya is cut off by Sanemi.

“Go ahead, be my guest!” Sanemi almost shouts, turning to face Tanjiro. He stepped into Tanjiro’s space, pointing his finger at Tanjiro’s chest. “The water is dangerous. You do not know what it can do, or if it’s the sole reason everyone has died.”

“Aniki–”

“Shut up,” Sanemi snaps, glancing at Genya. Furious lavender eyes glared at Genya, “I’m not your Aniki, so stop referring to me as such!” He moves away. “If you all can’t handle the simple truth of this mission, then leave. I don’t have the fucking time to baby anyone.” Sanemi stomps away.

As much as Tanjiro wanted to do anything, he couldn’t. The unsettling feeling continued to grow as Nezuko was lightly scratching inside the box, practically a warning to not go close. He turns his head before moving away. Everyone else was following behind.

Genya’s hands twitched. He wanted to follow his Aniki. He wanted to tell Nemi everything and get his brother to see that all they want to do is help. Still, it would be difficult to get through to the Wind Hashira.

As the others searched for any possible clues, Genya tried his hardest to catch his brother. With their senses dulled, they knew they were playing by the demon’s rules. Even Inosuke’s spatial awareness was targeted.

“We’re getting nowhere,” Zenitsu whines one night. They’ve been here for three days and have found nothing. Tanjiro tried to keep everyone’s hopes up, but now it’s been difficult. Even if there was no one living in this village anymore, they needed to get rid of the demon.

“Do you think the Wind Pillar has any luck?”

Kanao didn’t doubt the Hashira’s skills, but she shook her head. “Our crows would’ve informed us if the demon’s been killed.” She pets Nezuko’s head softly as she was sitting beside him.

“Argh! This is taking forever, let’s just search for it,” Inosuke interrupts. He begins waving his arms around. “That’s probably what the Wind guy been doing.”

Tanjiro glanced at Genya. “What do you think, Genya?”

Genya took a second before nodding his head. “We should join Aniki to find the demon.”

So, that’s what they did when they went to search for the Wind Hashira.

Sanemi wasn’t too far. He was looking at the water. Three days and no fucking luck on finding the damn thing. What was he missing? He knows they’re being watched, but he can’t figure out where it was coming from. The demon’s aura covered the whole forest and water. Thankfully, he brought supplies before he arrived.

‘Does Genya have–?’

No.

He shook his head. He won’t think about his brother.

“You look so sad.”

Sanemi stops. It was a soft, feminine voice. When he turns to his side to see a woman taller than him. She had tears running down her face. “Who–?” She looked to have no demonic features. Her aura wasn’t…

Where did she come from?

Where was she hiding?

Was she human?

She leaned down to the water, gathering just a little ounce of water. The water didn’t react as she lifted it up. “This town used to be so beautiful. Never was it misery. Everyone was so happy. And then kids were dying. They were drowning themselves. No parent could cope. So, they killed themselves…then they killed their children before they could leave them.”

What is she going on about?

“You were never a part of this village, but you lost someone…” Sanemi stepped back. What the hell is she going on about?

She only offers a small smile. “You have a brother, don’t you? One that’s alive–”

“Shut the fuck up!” Sanemi growls, revealing his blade. However, she doesn’t look fazed at all. She only grins, her smile twisting as Sanemi realizes who…no…what she is.

It’s a demon.

“Aniki!”

Genya and other slayers were rushing to him. The demon laughs, “I’m Kizu! Now, you’re finished as well as the others!” She shouts. As a Hashira, he should’ve blocked the attack. Yet, he was distracted the moment his little brother shouted his name.

“Nemi! Watch out!!”

Looking back at the demon, water rose from the lake, slamming into him. Sanemi grunted as he’s launched into the forest. Genya panicked. No. No! He begins running to the forest, desperate to catch up to his older brother.

The demon laughs. She has them where she wants them. As Tanjiro, Inosuke, and Kanao were rushing forward. She dissolves into the water, disappearing.

Sanemi would’ve been launched further if he didn’t grasp the tree branch. He grunted, wincing almost at his shoulder popping. “Fuck!” Sanemi drops from the branch as he adjusts his grip on the hilt. His shoulder was fine. He coughs into his hand to get rid of the remaining water.

Damnit!

He growled in anger. How could he have gotten distracted like that? It was child’s play, and yet he fell for the demon’s trap.

Before he could shout for the demon to show herself, there was something else.

“You truly are pathetic,” a voice mocks.

Sanemi freezes, for the first time in a long time, he feels as if he couldn’t move. When he glances back to see a familiar face, one he hasn’t seen in such a long time.

Even in the darkness, Sanemi could make out who was there, considering it was already hard enough for him to see at night. Masachika stood there, crossing his arms. There was an anger behind those once-kind eyes.

“You’re not real,” Sanemi splat. He held Masachika in his arms when his friend died. This was not real. Still, this fake only laughs.

“Is that what you tell yourself when you don’t want to reflect on your failure?” Masachika taunts. As he stepped out from the shadows, finally the moonlight reflected on Masachika. In the moonlight, his appearance was much more apparent. Sanemi’s eyes finally adjusted to him.

Sanemi couldn’t see color, but he didn’t need to when he could see the gaping wound on Masachika’s forehead.

“You’re selfish, Sanemi Shinazugawa,” Masachika spits out. “I’m so fucking ashamed that I ever thought of you as my brother!”

“You’re not fucking real!” Sanemi shouts. This was the demon’s BDA. None of this was real. This was his mind fucking with him. She was making him delusional. “YOU’RE JUST A DEMON!” Launching forward, Sanemi was prepared with his sword, slashing at whatever he could. He was going to slaughter this demon that dared to wear the friend of someone he once had considered an older brother.

“DIE!”

Masachika’s sword only clashes against his. He laughs, seeing Sanemi’s anger. His smile grows sweet as if he was smirking. “You were nothing like your mother. Only acting with anger and violence, just like your damn father! Like father, like son! What a shame!”

“Shut up! Shut up!” Sanemi twists his blade, almost hitting Masachika if it wasn’t for another hit to the stomach, slamming him back against the tree. He grunts as he slides down the tree. 

“Attacking your fellow comrades?” A sorrowful voice begins. Sanemi grits his teeth, forcing himself to sit. “Y-You’re not real,” he struggled out. As he tried to hold face, there was a horror crossing his features. As his eyes were casted downwards, already in his view was an ever-so familiar haori.

“Oh, Sanemi,” her voice softened, once warm hands settled on his face. A chilling sensation runs down his spine as she tilts his chin upwards to face her. Kind purple eyes looked into his eyes.

“I thought so highly of you,” Kanae admits. Her eyes grow sad as she only gives him a sweet smile. She leans him close, pressing his head against her chest. It was cruel. Sanemi’s body wouldn’t stop trembling.

“I wished you would’ve said how you felt.”

Sanemi snaps out of his thoughts, a warm substance dripping on his face and hands. When he looked down, he saw the substance coloring his hands. For a second, he felt as if he was just a small child. Kanae’s touch always reminded him of his mother. Both were soft, gentle, and so kind.

At this moment, Sanemi forced himself away.

There was a reason he felt the warm substance, Kanae’s chest was open, blood pouring out as her lungs were sliced. Blood dripped from her mouth as she held the same sweet smile. The same smile he’s seen Shinobu begin to adapt.

“Sanemi?”

Sanemi forced himself to stand on his two feet, gripping his sword. “All of this is just in my head! You’re all not real!” Sanemi shouts. “Just a fucking demon messing with me!” His grasp falters around his blade, his hands moving to grip on his hair. How dare this demon use his former friends as fucking puppets.

“If we’re so fake, then why don’t you look at us?” Masachika retorts. Sanemi gritted his teeth. “Shut up!”

Sanemi rushes forward.

Genya stopped once he saw his brother, just a distance away from him. He hears his friends following behind.

“Genya, please stop!” Tanjiro tried.

However, Genya was no longer paying attention. All his mind could focus on is that his brother is standing in the distance. His hands were trembling while he was holding on to his sword.

“Aniki?”

Genya tries. Tanjiro, Kanao, Inosuke, and Zenitsu stop behind him. In the distance was the Wind Hashira, silent and looking forward with his blade drawn. Sorrow and self-deprecating rolled off from the Wind Hashira’s scent. That’s when it hits Tanjiro, he can smell properly. His heightened sense of smell was back. Zenitsu stares forward, Sanemi’s heartbeat sounded erratic.

Why did they get their senses back now?

Something about this felt wrong. Why were their senses dulled in the first place? How did the demon know who to target?

The Wind Hashira only stood there in silence. It seemed that he was talking to someone, but there was no one. What was happening?

“Mr. Shinazugawa?” Tanjiro starts.

Why was he–?!

“Shut up!” Sanemi dashes forward. Tanjiro didn’t have any time to dodge, despite the training he received previously from the Hashira. None of it prepared him for the raw strength of the Wind Hashira. Before the sword could slash his stomach, he’s shoved away.

“W-What?”

Kanao was holding the Wind Hashira back.

“Wind Hashira! What are you doing?” She demands. Attacking Corps members was highly prohibited. It couldn’t be because of Tanjiro or Nezuko. Sanemi was told not to attack. He was loyal to the Master, so why?

“Wind guy is attacking!” Inosuke yells out, rushing to defend his fellow friend. Sanemi dodges it with ease. There’s no emotion in his eyes as he attacks as he backs away.

Genya was horrified. “Nemi! Stop!”

Then there was a laugh above them. All of them stood back as Sanemi raised his sword, waiting. A demon looms over them. The same woman they saw from the lake, the same one that stood in front of the Wind Hashira.

“He can’t hear you,” she mocks. “I knew a Hashira was here! I waited. I waited for him to come to me. He thought he could take me on, but he got distracted. I couldn’t take him out early, since there were more slayers. So, who’s more suitable for ending slayers, a Hashira!” She gestures to Sanemi.

Genya growls, “I will fucking kill you! What the hell did you do to my brother!?”

Her grin widens, “He drank the water…so I’ll let you guess what he’s seeing.” Genya only stares in horror when she makes a slitting sound. She was filled with delight from the absolute horror on their faces. “But! By all means, try and snap him out before he croaks and dies!” Her eyes focused on the slayer with the double barrel gun. The despair and anger on his face was beautiful.

“So, what will it be, to kill your fellow comrade or die trying!” She laughs, cackling. She disappears into the forest. She’ll get to have the sweet marechi and a bunch of other slayers, especially the boy with the hanafuda earrings. How pleased will her Master be!

There was anger in Kanao’s features for the first time. She glances at Tanjiro and Zenitsu. “Please, go after her! Genya, Inosuke, and I can handle him!” Kanao knew she should try and get Genya to go after the demon, but he had the highest chance to get through to the Wind Hashira.

Inosuke grunts, “Don’t order me around!” He waves his swords around as he goes to take the Wind Hashira back.

Tanjiro nods his head, heading off with Zenitsu. He should set the box down, but he can’t afford to be separated from Nezuko in case the demon tries to get a hold of his sister.

Sanemi, on the other hand, was trying to shut the voices. Masachika and Kanae were fighting too well. There was force striking him.

“SHUT UP! SHUT UP, DEMON!” Sanemi shouts. How dare it wear the face of Masachika! He rushes for the demon. Masachika laughs, dodging his attacks.

“Aww, poor Nemi can’t even hit me. No wonder you’re so pathetic!” With one swing, it forces Sanemi back as he grits his teeth. “What kind of pillar fails to protect anyone? It’s always you who gets protected.” Masachika mocked. “You should’ve been the one to die.”

Sanemi choked, his hands trembling around the hilt. He feels a grip on his shoulders. A whisper.

“You’re selfish,” Kanae’s sweet voice says. “You are nothing.”

“Why do you get to live?”

Sanemi swipes his blade when he turns around. He sees his younger siblings looking at him. Gaping wounds in front of him, scratches and deep cuts. Koto was sobbing.

“Why didn’t you save us?”

Sumi and Teiko looked at him with so much hatred. Shuya and Hiroshi were crying as well. “It won’t stop hurting,” Shuya begs. “Why, Nemi?” Sanemi felt tears in his eyes.

Moving one of his hands to his hair, he gripped it tightly as he was trying to get distance. It wasn’t helping as he kept seeing Kanae and Masachika aiming their attacks.

“Aniki, please!” Genya kept begging. Inosuke and Kanao were keeping Sanemi at bay, but he needed to get through to his brother. It didn’t even seem that Sanemi was even listening, until a hit from Inosuke and Kanao combined, threw the Wind Hashira back, almost slamming his head against the bulk of the tree.

Sanemi doesn’t even realize he’s bleeding as he’s gripping his hair with one hand. He was muttering the same words. Telling what he’s seeing that they’re just demons. Sanemi was hallucinating.

Kanao was unprepared for Sanemi’s next attack. The blistering wind knocked her into a tree, almost knocking her out as she let out a sharp cry. Inosuke rushes forward. “Leave Zanao alone!” He tries to block Sanemi’s attack until it forces him away into the leaves of one of the trees.

Sanemi was stepping closer, prepared to kill Kanao. “You aren’t Kanae,” Sanemi’s barely audible words were finally heard. Kanao’s head snaps to face the Wind Hashira. Lavender eyes were filled with complete anger that masked over the fear. “You’re a demon. A fucking leech! Fucking d–” Sanemi’s interrupted.

Genya had dashed forward, grasping his brother by the waist, knocking both of them away from Kanao. The sharp blade glided across Genya’s yukata as it sliced through the purple fabric. Genya bit down on the sharp sting in his side. He managed to pin Sanemi down.

He was surprised to get the upper hand, but he knows it's because of Sanemi’s heightened breathing that’s keeping him down. Sanemi was frantic. He was panting heavily, struggling. Sanemi’s blade had fallen away.

“Nemi, please!” Genya tried. It broke his heart to see his brother this way. Tears were falling from his older brother’s eyes as Sanemi tried to get the upper hand.

Sanemi needed to get out. He needed to get away. All he could see was soulless eyes looking at him, empty husks with no eyes. Genya was crying to him, there was blood leaking from his empty eye holds, dropping on his face.

“Nemi, why?” Genya sobs. “Why couldn’t you have let me die? It’s because of you I keep hurting! Why? Why?” Sanemi tried to shake Genya away. “Because of you, I’m going to die. Why are you just like Dad? I-I thought my Nemi would never hurt me.”

“I-I’m sorry!” Sanemi begins shouting. “Please, Genya, I’m so fucking sorry!” He can hear his heart pounding in his ears. He felt like he couldn’t breathe.

Genya’s grip almost loosens when he hears his brother apologize, tears running down his brother’s face. He was pleading for Genya’s forgiveness. All logic leaves his mind as he hugs his brother. He feels his own tears fall down his cheeks.

“Nemi, please, I should’ve been better. I should’ve been stronger. If I wasn’t so weak, I would’ve stopped that demon from getting you. I’m so sorry, Nemi.” He hugs tightly.

Suddenly, it all stops.

When Genya pulled away, Sanemi’s eyes were shut. His breathing was heavy as he was unconscious. Did Tanjiro and Zenitsu get the demon? He doesn’t need to answer when he sees his friends. Tanjiro looked at them with concern as Kanao sent her crow to get the Kakushi to assess the damage. 

But the damage has already been done. 

Genya didn’t leave his brother’s side when they were taken to the Butterfly Mansion. He did have to leave for a second to have his wounds examined. Inosuke had a minor concussion while Kanao had broken her wrist. Tanjiro and Zenitsu had very minor bruises. Thankfully, Nezuko wasn’t involved.

However, Sanemi was a different case. He managed to dislocate his shoulder, had scratches and cuts on his body from fighting the hallucinations, and was running a high fever from the contaminated water. Shinobu reassured him that Sanemi would be fine. Nothing like this could take the Wind Hashira down.

Even with her words, a part of Genya couldn’t relax. He's never seen his brother break down. To everyone, the Wind Hashira never showed his emotions, only expressing anger. All he wanted to do was snap in anger, but he shut it down. It wasn’t Shinobu’s fault. It wasn’t their fault for what’s happening.

Yet, if he didn’t blame anyone, then all his thoughts were directed back to him. The dark whisper in his mind reminded him that this was all his fault. He should’ve done something, anything to help his brother.

“I’m so sorry,” Sanemi’s words repeated.

His voice was voided of anger, all that was left behind was a broken man. It contrasts so differently from what he’s used to. If he was to die right now, he didn’t want his last moments to be about his crying Nemi.

“You’re such an idiot, Genya,” Genya uttered to himself, gripping the edges of his clothing. He shut his eyes tightly. He ignored the aching pain going through him. As much as the physical pain barely bothered him, he wished it was much more painful. He wanted the pain to mask over his thoughts.

He just didn’t want to think again.

And yet, he knew that was impossible.

“I’m so sorry, Nemi,” Genya apologizes. He finally opens his eyes to look at his sick brother. The sickening thought was that it reminded him faintly of the past. How rarely Sanemi got sick, even when he did get sick, his Nemi always shoved it away because he’s the older brother.

His Nemi was the strongest person he knows.

Leaning over, Genya grasps onto his brother’s hand. The freezing cold didn’t comfort him. His brother always ran cold. He rubbed his brother’s hand, pulling it close. He lay his head down, slowly moving his brother’s hand to ruffle his hair. Remembering the memory of his brother running his hand through his hair, ruffling and puffing it up.

Shutting his eyes, Genya finally falls asleep, wishing to the gods to not take his brother away, to hope that his brother will be okay.

Because even then, Genya didn’t know what he'd do if his older brother died.

Everything hurts.

That was all Sanemi could process when he was waking up, his eyelids struggling. His mind was spacing out, going between unconsciousness and consciousness. He wanted to sleep for decades because of how exhausted he felt.

He groaned, feeling the aching feeling in his arm. As his eyes fell downwards, he saw a sling on his arm. He huffs. ‘ Great .’ Still, when he tried to move his other arm, he stopped. There was something touching him. It almost made him flinch as if he was touching fire.

Right there under his careful touch was his younger brother.

Genya was sleeping peacefully under his hand. There were faint streaks of tears going down Genya’s cheeks. A part of Sanemi crumbled at the mere thought of his younger brother crying, worrying over him. He doesn’t understand why Genya keeps coming back. After everything he’s done, it didn’t make sense.

He hurt Genya. He almost blinded Genya just because he couldn’t fucking mentally comprehend the fact his baby brother was eating demons. He was willing to permanently injury his brother just so he would leave the Demon Slayer Corps. Despite everything, Genya kept coming back.

What did he do to deserve his kindness?

Still, his hand moves down to rub his finger against Genya’s scar. The rough patch of skin felt the same as his scars. He could never forget that night. Even as Genya called him a murderer, Sanemi didn’t care, because he knew that no matter what, he was going to protect his baby brother.

Nothing was ever going to change that.

He wished Genya would leave the Corps and live a full life. Never having to look over his shoulders that a demon would be lurking in the corners. He sighed. He knew that wasn’t going to happen. No matter what he does, Genya won't stay away. Still, a part of him wishes he could have his brother. It was selfish how much he misses his little brother.

Maybe he…Maybe he could try and get Genya–

“Because of you, I’m going to die. Why are you just like Dad? I-I thought my Nemi would never hurt me.”

Sanemi yanks his hand away, the memory finally returning. He forces himself to sit up as he tries to shake away the horrible hallucinations. Even if it was in his head, none of it denied the fact that it was what he truly believed. If he stays in Genya’s life, he would be nothing but a danger.

For fucks sake, he has this cursed blood coursing through his system. If he stays in Genya’s life, he’ll get him killed. The hallucination would be nothing but reality.

“Nemi?”

Sanemi snapped out of his thoughts, seeing his younger brother awake. There were tears in Genya’s eyes. “You’re okay!” Genya cries out, rushing forward, embracing his brother. Sanemi shook, trembling in Genya’s grasp. His mind swirls, shouting at him to shove his brother away.

He shouldn’t let Genya get this close.

He can’t.

‘Please, Genya, please just stop loving me.’ Sanemi tried. He couldn’t even get the words out, because he knew he could never push Genya away with his words. Genya was just like him, stubborn and headstrong.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, Nemi,” Genya continued. “I was so scared. I was so scared I was going to lose you,” Genya sobs. Sanemi’s heart breaks, little by little, his brother sounded so scared, so broken.

Genya’s grip never lightens, trying to tell Sanemi that he’s here. His brother is allowed to feel vulnerable around him.

Finally, the dam breaks.

Tight arms wrap around his midsection, yanking him close, unraveling the sling as Sanemi held tightly on his brother. Genya only returned the gesture. He wasn’t going to let go. He wasn’t going to let go. Genya doesn’t say anything as wet tears soak his clothing as Sanemi was sobbing against his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry, Genya,” Sanemi sobs. He felt like a child crying to their Mama for doing something wrong, but all those doubts were shoved to the deepest parts of his mind. Genya felt his own tears beginning to fall.

“I-It’s okay, Nemi,” Genya breaks. He trembles as he holds his brother.

The two brothers only held each other as they finally let down their walls. Neither of them planned to let go. So, it wasn’t surprising they were crying til the afternoon.

Sanemi may be shorter, but Genya was younger. Genya rested his head on Sanemi’s shoulder as Sanemi rested his head against Genya’s head. Both were content with saying nothing, considering how restless they were.

Even the butterfly girls or Shinobu haven’t come to interrupt them. Sanemi appreciated it. He doesn’t know if he has the will to deal with anyone.

“You got hurt, didn’t you?” Sanemi finally interrupts the silence. Genya tenses before sighing, lying wouldn’t be the best. “Yes,” he answered. “Still, my injuries were healed a few hours ago, so I’m okay, Aniki. How are you?”

“I’m fine,” Sanemi grunts. “I’m guessing the Kamado boy, and his friends ended the demon?” Genya hums before shrugging. “I believe so,” he continued, “Kanao, Inosuke, and I were in charge with fighting you.” Genya laughs a little dryly.

“I guess you were actually being light with the training,” Genya says, trying to make his words sound as if he was telling a joke. “The other slayers were right. You, Hashira, are on a different level.” Genya moves off Sanemi’s shoulder, looking at his brother.

He sees Sanemi’s hesitation before he sighs.

“We’re Hashira for a reason,” Sanemi says. “Being soft gets us nowhere, demons don’t play fair. They aren’t going to lower and give anyone a chance.” Sanemi’s fists tightened. “They aren’t kind.” Forcing down the dark memories of Kanae and Masachika below. “They take and destroy.”

Sanemi wanted to laugh bitterly. How those words described him. It was cruel, but it was true. He destroys everything he touches. Nothing will change that fact.

Genya saw Sanemi’s faltering. Even if Sanemi tried to put up this tough facade, Genya could always see right through it. His Nemi always wore his heart on his sleeve.

“Nemi, what happened yesterday wasn’t your fault,” Genya says. Sanemi’s head snaps to face him. “What the fuck are you talking about?” He wants to shout and react in anger, but Genya only offers him a sad smile.

“The demon…she didn’t need to say what you were seeing, but I can tell…You saw our siblings and Mom…you saw your friends. I…I tried not to think too much about it, but you kept saying ‘Masachika’ or ‘Kanae ’. You kept calling us demons for wearing their faces, but for me, you said my name,” Genya explained.

It was as if a bucket of freezing water was dropped on his head. Sanemi wanted to deny the statement, telling Genya he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but the words died the moment he tried to speak. A part of him was furious to himself that he allowed such a small fry demon to get him…to make him so vulnerable.

What kind of Hashira was he?

How disappointed Masachika–?

Sanemi shut down that voice. He gritted his teeth. “Leave.” He says, finally. Genya freezes. “What?” Genya was shocked. Sanemi growls. “I SAID FUCKING LEAVE!” Genya was shoved away as Sanemi looked furious. Sanemi forced down his tears as he wanted his brother gone from his sights.

He only calms down after Genya leaves the room.

Once Genya leaves, Sanemi only stares at the shut door.

Alone, Sanemi could no longer shake away the distant memory.

“Look, Sanemi,” his Mama’s voice was gentle and soft. In her arms, she held his little brother. Sanemi struggled on the tips of his toes to see the baby. He only hops onto the bed when one of the nice ladies lifted him up. Sanemi was on his knees, gazing at the little baby.

Sanemi tilts his head. “He’s so small,” Sanemi points out. Shizu giggles. “Of course he is, my love. He just needs to grow.” Sanemi nods his head, as he places his finger forward to touch the baby. The baby didn't cry when Sanemi touched his cheek. Dark purple eyes only falling on Sanemi.

The baby begins babbling, happily moving his hands as a chubby hand grasps Sanemi’s finger. Sanemi’s smile grows as he giggles. Shizu’s heart felt so full when she saw the sweet smile on her baby’s face. Sanemi was so engrossed with the baby. He doesn’t notice his Mama placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

“I’ll keep you safe, Genya,” Sanemi promises. “Your big brother is going to always be there for you.” The 5-year-old promises with his full heart. He’ll never let anyone hurt his baby brother. He’ll protect Genya no matter what.

Because that’s what big brothers do…they protect their little brothers. Even if it’s from them.

That’s what Sanemi will do.

He’ll protect Genya to his dying breath.

Even if it meant keeping Genya away from him. Genya will never be safe if he was around him. Sanemi didn’t deserve Genya. His little brother deserved so much better.

Even when he holds a crumbling Genya in his arms, shouting that his Nemi will do something. That his Nemi will stop and save him because…

“…because my Nemi is the sweetest person in the world.”